What’s up guys? I had a pretty good Saturday — the Astros got hammered by the Rays while I watched from great seats, but I got hammered, too. I think I win. And a pretty shit Sunday. My wife’s step-father is in hospice care and failing. She went out of the house Sunday afternoon not knowing much beyond that. It is definitely the end, we’re just not sure if its tomorrow or next week. Fuck cancer!
Our neighbors to the south got beat pretty handily. I did not get a chance to watch the match, but I heard Neymar finally got the penalty he spent the whole first round diving for. We’ll see if Japan has anything for the Belgish. The Belgs. The capital of EUtopia. Japan went up 2-0, currently tied 2-2 in the 80th minute. Update: Belgium pulls it out at the last second! Wow! Japan over-commits going for the win and gives it away.
Think of all the progressive car drivers in NYC who will be crying themselves to sleep tonight that they missed an opportunity. And you know, the rest of us who don’t wish death on the children of politicians we disagree with, let’s just give Eric Trump a thumbs-up for doing something decent.
Some people were making fun of this, but I like boiled hotdogs. I think I had five or six hotdogs at two baseball games last week. And I’m not sorry. I’m gonna buy a bunch and try this for 4th of July since my kids will want hotdogs anyways. And I’ll make ribs to fall back on if they are just hotdogs.
“The supposed quietude of a good man allures the ruffian; while on the other hand, arms, like law, discourage and keep the invader and the plunderer in awe, and preserve order in the world as well as property. The balance of power is the scale of peace. The same balance would be preserved were all the world destitute of arms, for all would be alike; but since some will not, others dare not lay them aside. And while a single nation refuses to lay them down, it is proper that all should keep them up. Horrid mischief would ensue were one-half the world deprived of the use of them; for while avarice and ambition have a place in the heart of man, the weak will become a prey to the strong. The history of every age and nation establishes these truths, and facts need but little arguments when they prove themselves.” – Thomas Paine, “Thoughts on Defensive War” in Pennsylvania Magazine, July 1775
May, 2018 went out with a bang for us. Our normally peaceful, quiet life was abruptly interrupted on the morning of May 29 by a knock at the door. A Deputy Sheriff had come to warn us that a gang of bandits had committed armed robbery and were now fleeing from the police on foot. They were hiding in the immediate area. We were to lock everything up and stay vigilant. We were a prime target for a desperate man looking to steal a getaway car.
I made certain all of our doors and windows were locked. I made certain the vehicle we keep out of the garage was locked up. I hid all of the keys inside the house. Later that afternoon a Louisiana State Trooper came to the door to reiterate just how dangerous the situation was. They had caught three of the four but the fourth man was still in the area armed and dangerous. After that sunk in I decided that keeping two small pistols out, one for myself and one for my wife, was not adequate. I got one of my Winchester rifles out of the safe and carried it around with me everywhere in the house.
We have dogs. They live inside the house with us and only venture out into a fenced in back yard. Dogs are the best burglar alarm one can have. No Frisbee time those two days but I still had to walk them out in the yard for bathroom breaks so I took them out one at a time several times over those two days so that I could keep one eye on the dog and one on the tree line. I carried my rifle with me.
That night was one of little sleep. I guessed that the fugitive would wait until dark to make his move. With all of the outside lights on and all of the inside lights out I put my wife in the bedroom with one Catahoula Cur and the three small dogs so that she could sleep. I slept on the couch with the other Catahoula, a 115 pound Teddy bear named Jack, sitting up with the Winchester across my lap. Every time Jack would raise his head or a cricket would chirp I would wake with a start.
On Thursday the 31st a hundred yards from our front door the last desperado gave himself up to the Sheriff. Two days of triple digit temperatures without food or water and near zero chance of escape convinced him to throw in the towel. It was a huge relief for the whole community. My rifle went back in the safe and everyone could mostly relax again. The experience reminded a lot of people that danger is real. The wolf can show up at the door anytime without warning. My pistols stay handy.
Incidentally Rigolette is pronounced ‘RowGulley’, one word. Hey, it is Louisiana.
I have to give credit to the Grant Parish Sheriff Steve McCain and a huge thank you to the other departments that aided us. Steve handled the crisis in a stellar manner. He got his man and no one was injured. He kept the suspect surrounded until he gave up. No doubt he could have gone charging into a couple hundred acres of thick woods after an armed and desperate man to put an end to the affair much sooner but he chose the safer tactic. It meant a sleepless night for a lot of people but if that is the price of no one getting injured I will pay it any day of the week.
This situation could have ended very badly but it did not. When it comes to deterring crime the police are only half of the equation. Mr. Alexis never did try to invade any of the homes in this community, not for hostages, not for food or water, not for a getaway car. He was afraid to. You see, everyone in this community owns firearms. Not a day goes by that I don’t hear gunfire from somewhere in the community. People here practice with their guns. There is sport shooting, hunting and just plain practice. Most importantly those arms are used for self-defense. The families and homes here are guarded with them. It seems that Mr. Alexis took note of this. I’m sure that crazy guy that walks his dogs with a rifle slung over his shoulder was no small part of his decision.
Holiday weeks suck when the holiday is in the middle of the week. Especially for those of us who don’t have vacation days. Meh, I need to stop complaining. At least its an extra day I get to spend with the family, even if I do spend it working. Which is not what Spain’s soccer will be doing. LOL, Russia? Really?!?! Also Croatia beat Denmark. And I will be cheering for Russia in their game. At least they’re exciting. That Croatia-Denmark match was exciting for about 10 minutes…the first five minutes of the game and the last 5. The rest was nearly unwatchable boring. And on Saturday, France beat Argentina…and the world laughed. There Uruguay beat Portugal…and it laughed harder. And I have to say, those were a pair of fun games to watch. Let’s hope Brazil-Mexico and Belgium-Japan are as much fun today.
Baseball games keep happening, and that means the Rays beat Houston again. What is it with that division that has them struggling this year? Other winners were: Baltimore (yes, Baltimore), Detroit, THE BIG RED MACHIIIIIIINE, the Mets, Phillies, Braves, Cubs, White Sox, Indians, Giants, Pirates, Dodgers, Mariners and Yankees.
LeBron upon seeing the state and local tax rates for Los Angeles.
And LeBron James signed with one of the Los Angeles basketball teams. I think it was the Lakers. So he will be playing there next year. Best of luck to him and Cleveland as they recover from the inevitable riots.
Hey, Hermann Hesse was born on this date. So was groundbreaking jurist Thurgood Marshall, shoe lover Imelda Marcos, Wendy’s founder Dave Thomas, “The King” Richard Petty, former Mexican President Vicente Fox, funnyman Larry David, Canadian wrestler Brett “The Hitman” Hart, steroid aficionado Jose Canseco, flamboyant figure skater Johnny Weir, drug- and alcohol fan Lindsay Lohan, and actress Margot Robbie.
Now its just called the Air Force. (And a few other things by Marines and Rangers.)
Its also the day Martin Luther decided he would become a monk after a violent thunderstorm, slaves aboard The Amistad revolt, Guiseppe Giribaldi began his hunger strike in Rome, Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid rob a train of $40,000 in Montana, John McGraw managed his first game for the Giants (a tenure that would last 30 years), the US Army Air Corps was founded, Amelia Earhart gets lost over Pacific, the “Lawrence Welk Show” made its debut, Elvis recorded “Hound Dog” and “Don’t Be Cruel”, Sam Walton opened his first store, LBJ signed the Civil Rights Act and Voting Rights Acts into law after the Democrats who had opposed it via filibuster give up, the Supreme Court allowed the death penalty to be reinstated, the first of the idiotic Susan B Anthony dollars was issued, Airplane! premiered, and the AbioCor self-contained artificial ear was created.
That’s the appetizer. Now for the main course. And by “main course”, I mean…the links!
Remember the link I put up last week about somebody leaving flyers with fentanyl on them on police vehicles here in Houston? It turns out to have been bullshit all along. Which means any cases where people were convicted based on the results of an initial drug test should be tossed out of court, right? They also need to get the deputy who was hospitalized with fentanyl-like symptoms some psychiatric help.
ZARDOZ SPEAKS TO YOU, HIS CHOSEN ONES. BEING IN BETWEEN GRAIN SHIPMENTS, ZARDOZ HAS DROPPED IN TO LIFT YOU FROM BRUTALITY. HE GIVES YOU THE GIFT OF THE LINK, TO USE IN YOUR SNARKING AT THE BRUTALS. THE FILTH OF BRUTALS MUST BE CLEANSED FROM THE INTERNET. SNARK AT THEM, DRIVE THEM OFF!
IT APPEARS THE BRUTALS OF MEXICO ARE GOING TOIMITATE OTHER FAILED NATIONS. THIS SHOULD RESULT IN MUCH BRUTAL MISERY. ZARDOZ IS PLEASED.
ZARDOZ IS NOT PLEASED WITH THE PAUSE IN CLEANSINGHERE. GET BACK TO IT, UAE BRUTALS!
NOW THIS IS SOME PROPER CLEANSING. ZARDOZ IS PLEASED.
Previously, I showed you how to make a chicken kiev type dish as an impressive date night main course. A date night dinner also needs a dessert. It’s ok to serve fresh fruit and cookies, but I’d like to show you how to make an equally impressive dessert to go with it. Although I said a date night dinner shouldn’t require you to spend time in the kitchen, this dessert does. It’s your chance to show off. I’m going to make a pineapple flambé to serve over ice cream.
Mise en Place
This dessert is yet another canvas for experimentation. I like to use a fresh fruit and a dried fruit. I soak the dried fruit in liquor. I am using dried cherries soaked in rum. Soaking them plumps them up and lets them soak up the flavor. I suggest you begin soaking them just before serving dinner. The rum is needed to make the flambe.
Cherries in Rum
I like cinnamon and pineapple, so I also dust the pineapple with a little cinnamon. I chop some fresh pineapple and sauté it in butter and a little brown sugar. When the pineapple reaches a good texture – easily pierced with a fork – I will add the dried cherries and rum.
IMPORTANT!
Important safety tip. Always remove the pan from the fire, add the alcohol, and then put it back on the fire. (Your guest should stand back.) If you have a gas stove, tip the pan slightly (away from you) and the fumes will catch fire. Impressive. If you don’t have a gas stove, use a lighter once the pan is returned to the heat.
Flambé!
FLAMBE BABY!
Once the alcohol is flamed off, remove from the heat, dish up some ice cream and serve the pineapple mixture over the ice cream. Add a few nuts for texture. I’m using chopped pecans, but walnuts would also work.
Finished Dessert
(I know this is two big servings, I decided this would be my dinner. DON’T JUDGE ME!)
Variations
You can do many different combinations. I have done fresh apples (use something tart) and golden raisins soaked in bourbon. An apple brandy could be used, or switch out the raisins for dried cranberries. Peaches and dried cherries, pineapple and dried bananas, bananas and dried pineapple – you pick the liquor. They all work. I’ve used cinnamon on apples and basil on pineapple. Peaches, dried cherries and mint worked well. A friend of mine makes vanilla sugar by putting split vanilla beans in sugar in a small container. I bet that would be a good substitute for the sugar and cinnamon I used here. You’re going to eat it over ice cream, it’s hard to screw up.
So this one is last minute because of two things: work has begun ramping up into the five weeks of transferring operations between the two labs which means new and exciting incompatiblities (of every conceivable type) being discovered, and also the freeware software I use to generate my star charts borked out. Hey, don’t blame me for being Jewish Scottish Miserly Frugal economically minded. The geocentric stuff is easy to find substitutes for, but it took a while to get some heliocentric views.
And I’m glad I did, because this week is a doozy:
Yeah, he really is
We’ve got a construction that takes in five of the seven planets, with neither arm being major to the other: Sol-Mercury-Venus and Mercury-Earth-Mars in mutual opposition. That first bit is a sign of good gossip, but when it’s in opposition with the second it means that there is going to be a major blowup on the homefront caused by news of someone’s love life. Now, the one bit of consolation if it happens to be YOUR love life news that is at issue is that one of these conflagrations, is that Saturn is not part of this construction. So, the relationship will not be ending. Actually, since Saturn is currently retrograde right now, adding it to the construction would give signs of a Medea situation, but it’s not so it’s not.
So, on to the conjunctive news:
You’ve got three more weeks of this joke to come.
This is the first full week of the Sun in Cancer, so be sure to wear at least SPF45 and get any suspicious spots checked for melanoma. You don’t want to end up like John McCain do you? Actually, this is one of those uncomfortable situations astrology-wise. For people identified with (born in) Cancer, having the sun there is good. But with Cancer being a water sign and the sun being about as fiery an object as there is, the juxtaposition makes the rest of the sky kind of grumpy and on edge. Enjoy your July!
Leo is getting some love, and it’s not even its turn in the sun yet. This week it’s got a conjunction of Mercury with Venus, so Gryffindors can expect good news, good lovin’, and their cats will only excrete into their litterboxes.
In sports news, this week’s World Cup matches will feature an upset, as the moon moves into Aquarius along with Mars. Wel, I’m reading it as an upset. Technically it’s just “disorder/chaos/change” so riots or a flash flood would also be appropriate.
I suspect Hell is about as hot, but not quite as humid, as it has been here this weekend. The rabbits and squirrels are moving listlessly, and their predators aren’t even bothering to chase them. Birds are walking. The only things stirring are our cops and our criminals.
Deputies believe Williams possessed less than 1 gram of cocaine and a 9 mm bullet without a firearm owner’s identification card, according to a criminal complaint filed in McHenry County court. Williams originally was stopped for multiple traffic violations, and then deputies searched his car, Sheriff’s Deputy Sandra Rogers said.
Williams, of the zero to 100 block of Ivanhoe Lane, has been charged with possession of a controlled substance, possession with intent to deliver a controlled substance and possession of ammunition without a FOID card.
Good thing that the fine folks in the criminal justice system don’t believe in overcharging to force a plea deal.
Team Blue is too fucking lazy to make giant puppet heads any more. Now, I can get behind getting rid of ICE, but what will their union say? And here’s a better idea: get rid of all of DHS, a remarkably bad idea shoved through during a spasm of hysteria. ICE, sure, but start with TSA.
The “Families Belong Together” demonstrations, like the Women’s March and the March for Our Lives protests before it, attracted crowds of seasoned activists and normally apolitical first-timers to political dissent.
I wonder if they carried on the Women’s March tradition of banning Jews? And of course, the usual abusive use of children as props:
But by far the most powerful images of the protests came from the children, who spoke out for the rights of kids their own age to enjoy happy and normal childhoods.
Y’know, I was part of protests against the Viet Nam war and I didn’t know anyone who said, “Hey, let’s dress up the kids in Viet Cong outfits and bring ’em along!”
[TSA spokesman Mike]England said the concern is not that people may be hiding explosives or other illicit material inside of food. Rather, it’s that the food itself can look similar to the components of an explosive — therefore making it more likely that bags with snacks would be flagged for a time-consuming manual search. Officials thought it might be more efficient, in some cases, to have passengers remove the snacks from their bags ahead of time.
“Some foods and some organic materials can bear a strong resemblance to explosive materials,” he said.
Americans overseas often face a complex filing regimen. Swanson received another shock when he found out he was behind on tax filing requirements he did not know about. “It was in the tens of thousands of dollars to get caught up,” Swanson said.
He did not actually owe much in taxes because he had been living in Germany, a high-tax country, which offset what he owed to the U.S. Most of that money went to the cost of the paperwork and accounting fees.
Willie Brown Middle School was the most expensive new public school in San Francisco history. It cost $54 million to build and equip, and opened less than two years earlier. It was located less than a mile from my house, in the city’s Bayview district, where a lot of the city’s public housing sits and 20 percent of residents live below the federal poverty level. This new school was to be focused on science, technology, engineering, and math—STEM, for short. The money for Brown came from a voter-approved bond, as well as local philanthropists.
On opening day in August of 2015, around two dozen staff members greeted the very first class. That’s when the story took an alarming turn. Newspapers reported chaos on campus. Landake was later quoted in the San Francisco Examiner: “The first day of school there were, like, multiple incidents of physical violence.” After just a month, Principal Hobson quit, and an interim took charge. In mid-October, less than two months into the first school year, a third principal came on board. According to a local newspaper, in these first few months, six other faculty members resigned. (The district disputes this figure.) In a school survey, only 16 percent of the Brown staff described the campus as safe. Parents began to pull their kids out.
What’s the culprit? I think you know:
In 1978, California voters passed the state’s most infamous law: Proposition 13 severely restricted raising property taxes, and required a two-thirds majority to pass many tax measures. This gutted California’s education funding so severely that the state’s public schools, which had been ranked best in the nation in the 1950s, fell to among the worst in a few decades.
During more than three decades as a diplomat, Melville had served at U.S. embassies in Moscow, London and Berlin before President Barack Obama appointed him to the ambassadorship in Estonia in 2015.
Kaplan disputed the child pornography categorization and told Indiewire that the filming of the scenes was done “under the careful surveillance of the girls’ mothers” and neither of the girls were aware of what they were depicting.
HAWT!!!
Need another reason to believe that soccer is stupid? Here ya go.
During the World Cup, Lumidolls Moscow is giving fans the chance to dress their sex doll in whatever football shirt they like. They are offering all the different football t-shirts worn by each team, England, France, Spain, you know,” Sergi, a former telecoms worker, explained.
Punters can pay around £67 for half an hour, or £83 for an hour, to get down and dirty with the dolls.
Expect Dirty Jobs to cover the guys who have to clean this up.
E don reach five years wey Ogochukwu dey try stop smoke Igbo. But if im stop am, small time e go start again. But for di past six months now, e dey try to stop am again. Ogochukwu say, “e first start as competition among my friends wen we dey school but before I know, e don take over my life.” Dat na how im take start to abuse cannabis aka Igbo, five years ago.
Any questions?
Old Guy Music! There are several iron laws, one of which is, “Anything by Justin Bieber sucks.” Another is, “Never try covering a Tracy Chapman song. It just won’t work.” So of course my universe is shaken by… a Justin Bieber cover of a Tracy Chapman song. And fuck, he pulls it off. This is really good.
Uh oh… you don’t get a direct call from SP when things are going well. It was a bit hard to hear her, with the Cartoon Network on at a high volume in the background, but she told me to come to the command center right away. In person.
We all filed in the conference room and took our seats.
Last Glibs Meet Up?
It was announced that we had a STEVE SMITH problem. Funny…I thought mexican sharpshooter had his tiny ass dog back, and STEVE SMITH was on the way to rape reindeer or roger Santa or somesuch. It was much worse than that…
We had credible intelligence that STEVE SMITH was really headed to the Netherlands…to the ICC. He was going to turn himself in for RAPECRIMES against Humanity. Worst of all, he was going to roll over on us. We had put him up to it, for site content! None of us wanted to go sit in Slobodan Milošević’s old cell and die waiting for trial in the Hague. So what were we to do?
mex begged off, having just had a scrap with the RAPESQUATCH. Understandable. SugarFree was willing, but he was a bit tied up with an odd situation at work. Something about a valuable member of the team had gone missing, and he was on the trail to find him. I looked over at Warty, but he demurred. He was too busy building a Brazilian Ju-Jitsu robot, to act as a sparing partner. The last guy he sparred screamed like a damned soul when Warty dislocated both his shoulders…and a kneecap…and an ankle. Oddly enough, nobody in the gym wanted to practice with him after that.
OMWC told us no way in Hell he was going to risk CPS kicking the door in while he was gone and end up with a warrant for a “Home Alone” case. SP couldn’t leave, as the site would crumble. Plus she was usually engaged in some sort of mortal combat with WordPress or Comcast or someone like that. BrettL and sloopy had links duty, and small kids. Riven was stuck in an endless meeting loop at work…kind of a beginning of Superman type prison thing. Sounded awful.
“Let us out of this meeting!”
HM volunteered, rather Heroically, I thought. But he had to stay and do some linguistics work for us. We have hopes for a rather profitable return on a Anime-Twerk-Thicc-English interpretation app. So he was told to stay and work on it. Anyway, if that CUMMIEBOT ever returns, we need HM to deal with it. Guess who that left… Me. Obviously ZARDOZ could not go undercover. Besides, he was too sympathetic to STEVE SMITH after the RAPESQUATCH helped him dry out last year. SEA SMITH…yeah, family loyalty.
Fine. OK. Guess I am it. This should take a week or more to do some recon, and lay in wait for THE STEVE SMITH SANCTION.
Did someone say “Sanction”?
I will do my best to send reports. I have to go pack now.
P.S. I want to be back in time for the wailing and gnashing of teeth this will bring.
It finally came to pass. Upon receipt of a Glib’s name and address, I boxed up the promised Grand Canyon Shaggy Bock along with a few others I thought would be of interest. Unfortunately, Stouts tend to fall out of favor earlier in the year in Arizona than other parts of the country so I did the best I could.
On the flip side, a little under a week later I received a message from UPS and the Glib who drew my name both confirming there was a package at my door.
This is my review of Big Ditch Excavator Rye Brown Ale. Hat Tip: Lackadaisical
I don’t know about you, but when I think of Buffalo, ditches are not what come to mind. Normally, it’s hot wings, the Goo Goo Dolls, Jim Kelly and lemon scent heavy starch.
Not this guy
According to the handwritten note (nice touch, BTW) I also received, the big ditch refers to the Erie Canal. For those of us that were fans of the NFL and/or Chris Berman in the 90’s, this is not a reference to the former starting quarterback of NY (football) Giants: Danny (Erie) Kanell.
The Erie Canal was one of the first infrastructure projects in the United States. Its purpose was to connect the northeast with the rest of the country by digging a waterway starting from Troy, NY to Rome, Syracuse, Rochester and finally ending in Buffalo at Lake Erie. From there, ships could travel via the Great Lakes to ports in the midwest. Congress easily passed an appropriation for the project but interestingly enough it was vetoed by president James Monroe because, get this—he thought the idea was unconstitutional.
Jefferson didnt much care for it either (emphasis mine).
1817 June 16. (Jefferson to Albert Gallatin). “You will have learned that an act for internal improvement, after passing both Houses, was negatived by the President. The act was founded, avowedly, on the principle that the phrase in the Constitution which authorizes Congress ‘to lay taxes to pay the debts and provide for the general welfare,’ was an extension of the powers specifically enumerated to whatever would promote the general welfare…it was never meant they should provide for that welfare but by the exercise of the enumerated powers, so it could not have been meant they should raise money for purposes which the enumeration did not place under their action…I think the passage and rejection of this bill a fortunate incident…[it] will settle forever the meaning of this phrase, which, by a mere grammatical quibble, has countenanced the General Government in a claim of universal power.”
How quaint. I’m getting another beer.
Nevertheless, the project was eventually funded by the state of New York and construction began on July 4, 1817. Given the time, construction was done the hard way—with picks and shovels. Yes, the work was done mostly by immigrants.
The canal is viewed by many historians as a success. Within 15 years of construction New York City became the largest port in the country by tonnage processed, exceeding Boston, Baltimore and New Orleans—combined. Nearly 80% of the population of Upstate New York lives within 25 miles of the canal because many cities grew around the canal, much like people later settled around railways and major highways.
Is this beer any good? If you have been following my weekly beer review you might know that I happen to fancy brown ale as well as rye beer. Naturally the combination of the two I found most enjoyable. Big Ditch Excavator Rye Brown Ale: 4.2/5
Also included was the Hayburner IPA.
This isn’t as overpowering as most IPA, so if you happen to be the type that is in search of the most horrifying, tear inducing IPA possible—keep looking. If you happen to be more of a traditionalist as far as IPA is concerned, you may like this. If you happen to find the idea of IPA to be in poor taste, stick to what you like. Big Ditch Hayburner IPA: 3.5/5
More to come on the Spring Beer it Forward…stay tuned.
I made certain all of our doors and windows were locked. I made certain the vehicle we keep out of the garage was locked up. I hid all of the keys inside the house. Later that afternoon a Louisiana State Trooper came to the door to reiterate just how dangerous the situation was. They had caught three of the four but the fourth man was still in the area armed and dangerous. After that sunk in I decided that keeping two small pistols out, one for myself and one for my wife, was not adequate. I got one of my Winchester rifles out of the safe and carried it around with me everywhere in the house.
