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  • Beyond the Pale

    Not long ago I saw an article that amused me. It was a bunch of eggheads puzzling over the mystery of how humans were able to domesticate dogs. I had to laugh. Clearly none of those guys had ever domesticated a wild animal. Any mammal that lives in social groups, and some birds, domesticate easily. Don’t hit them with a stick and give them food. I dare you to try and get rid of them after that. I have rescued and raised cottontails, raccoon, and red squirrel. I know people who have had pet flying squirrels, grey squirrels, foxes, and I once dated a girl who raised a whitetail doe. The damned thing lived in the house and slept in the bed with her every night. Don’t ask.

    Anyway, the real question is not how did we domesticate dogs, but why. My wife jokes that we did not domesticate dogs, they domesticated us–or as she says dogmesticated. I think it is closer to enslavement. Hold on while I check my grocery list. I think they need more chews and treats, maybe even a bag of food that runs around $50….

    I’m back. The answer, of course, is simple. Having a pack of wolves hanging around your paleolithic camp at night is a good idea when you live in a world where all manner of beast and man are trying to eat you. It is nearly impossible to sneak up on a camp of sleeping people without sounding the alarm by waking the wolves. They were the original burglar alarm. In that world, people didn’t move around all that much. Wander outside your tribe’s territory and you were likely going to be put on a spit. Contemporary primitive cultures live within strict boundaries. Many people I have met in the more backward parts of the world live out their whole lives never traveling more than a few miles from the spot where they were born. I once tried to explain to a Bolivian who wanted to know where I was from by telling him how long it would take to get there by canoe. “Two years that way,” and I pointed north. That made sense to him.

    Beyond the pale. Ever wonder what that means or where it came from? Europeans didn’t have the extinct Eurasian wolf to domesticate, so they would build a fence around their village that was bristling with sharpened sticks or thorns. That was called the pale. Try to get past it and you were likely to be impaled. It was often whitewashed, which is why we use the word ‘pale’ to describe a color. At night, if someone got inside the pale, their silhouette could be seen more easily against the white background. The expression ‘beyond the pale’ refers to going outside the safe zone or going too far.

    I am saying that there was never a golden age of gamboling about the fields and dales. Throughout all of human history, people lived within strict boundaries. Go outside those boundaries and some dude named Trog was going to bring your nutsack home to his wife so that she could tan it and make a little purse out of it. Travel has always been restricted. In fact, I would contend that people have more freedom of movement today than at any time in history.

    I have heard people blame travel restriction on the rise of nation states and the modern idea of borders. Human history is mostly a chronicle of ethnic or cultural groups invading their neighbors. Travel restrictions were always there; nation states arose from the need for greater security. Borders were not drawn arbitrarily. They mark the edges of cultural territories. Restricting who may or may not cross those borders was and is a matter of life or death.

    The open borders advocates around here have gotten me on the fence once or twice, but looking at contemporary events around the world got my feet back on the ground. I agree that freedom of movement is an inalienable right. One has freedom of movement so long as they do not trespass. If one believes in self-ownership, that every person’s mind, body, and conscience are their own property and no one else’s, then by logical extension they must accept that the fruit of one’s labor is their own property also. I decide who is welcome to set foot on my property and who is restricted from doing so. If a group of like minded people own property collectively, then they decide who may or may not set foot on it. I have no problem with the principle or practice of a nation preventing trespass so long as they do not restrict movement out of those borders or prevent one of the collective owners from re-entering.

    There are other factors at play besides security, of course–the welfare state being the largest of those. Ideology is a concern of mine, as well. I am not a multiculturist. All cultures are not equal and the spectrum is quite wide. Flooding our country with people who do not accept the principle of inalienable rights or private ownership is worse than a bad idea. There are many individuals despite being from inferior cultures that would be a great credit to our country, and we should allow them in, even encourage them. Allowing just anyone based solely on their culture or ethnicity on the other hand is…unwise. A merit based system really is the only sensible policy in my mind.

    I know this is one of the more contentious subjects around here, so y’all have at it. I’ll make popcorn.

  • Monday Morning Links

    What a Masters Sunday!  Except for the ending, anyway.  Thanks to the groundskeepers who forgot to trim one stupid limb, Speith missed his chance to birdie 18 and lock Patrick Reeds’s sphincter up a bit.  Oh well, even assclowns like him win majors from time to time. Also, congrats to University of Minnesoooda-Duluth on their college hockey National Championship. They took on the best of the Big Ten and took em down.  Speaking of hockey, the playoffs are almost set.  I’ll give a little spiel tomorrow once they’re firmed up.

    That’s it for sports. I’m buried at work today already. So I’m gonna move on to…the links!

    Hey Zuckerberg, this is for you, buddy!

    When one senior exec of your social media platform data mining operation has to cancel interviews because she said people should pay them extra for them to protect their data, and your CEO has to take a crash course in how to not be a smarmy, holier-than-thou idiot before their meetings on Capitol Hill to explain what, exactly, they’re doing with personal data, you might have a bit of a problem. If you’re invested in FB, I recommend shorting it as quickly as possible.

    Welcome back to the sixties, man. What could possibly go wrong?

    Apparently, the Department of Justice will start complying with requests from the people who are literally tasked with overseeing them. Its just a coincidence that they diverted millions in their budget to shredder purchases a week before the announcement, so I’m sure this is going to be transparent and open.

    Its not a lie if you believe it. I don’t know, seems there’s a lot of weird shit that can happen to a person in space.  But if Neil didn’t see it, I’m not sure it happened.

    When asked to comment, the Syrian President said “meep meep-meep” and went back to Bunsen Honeydew’s laboratory.

    In response to a reported gas attack in Syria, someone allegedly attacked Syrian troops. Nobody is taking credit and nobody is assigning blame.  I’m starting to wonder if Syria is even a real place.

    The Pacific Pole Championships were this weekend in Los Angeles. And hundreds of gals working their way through college and/or nursing school as well as others showed just how tough it really is. Enjoy art in its highest form, gents.

    If we could tie this song into the last link, I’d think that was pretty cool.

    Well, have a great day, friends.

  • ZARDOZ’S SUNDAY NIGHT LINKS

    GO, AND SNARK AT THE BRUTALS!

    ZARDOZ SPEAKS TO YOU, HIS CHOSEN ONES. ZARDOZ NEEDS HIS CHOSEN ONES TO UP THEIR GAME, OF SNARKING AT THE BRUTALS WHO PLAGUE THE EARTH. ZARDOZ HAS FALLEN A BIT BEHIND IN KEEPING THE BRUTALS IN THEIR PLACE….THE CHOSEN ONES CAN HELP. THEREFOR, RECEIVE THE GIFT OF THE LINK, AND GO FORTH AND SNARK!

    • INTERESTING HOW REUTERS LABELS THE PM OF HUNGARY A “STRONGMAN”. ZARDOZ SEES HE WON A THIRD ELECTION. SO IS ANGELA MERKEL LABELED AS GERMAN “STRONGWOMAN”? ZARDOZ THOUGHT NOT.
    • ZARDOZ IS …DISAPPOINTED. ZARDOZ WAS HOPING FOR A HATE FILLED DUEL TO THE DEATH (PREFERABLY BOTH BRUTALS EXPIRING). CIVILITY IS VASTLY OVER-RATED. WHAT EVER HAPPENED TO “GO FORTH AND KILL”?
    • ZARDOZ OFFERS THIS, WITHOUT COMMENT. ZARDOZ TRUSTS HIS POINT HAS BEEN MADE.
    • ZARDOZ CAN ONLY HOPE THIS IS FRUITLESS – HOW ELSE CAN ZARDOZ END UP WITH A MASS BRUTAL EXTINCTION EVENT?!

    ZARDOZ HAS SPOKEN.

  • Spontaneous Cooking for One: Pan Sauces

    Last time I explained the brown and bake method which is so simple it doesn’t even feel like cooking. Another simple dinner method is to saute a protein and then make a pan sauce. This is one of the most versatile methods I know, and is perfect for chicken breasts or thin pork chops. Both can become dry and tasteless. This method adds flavor and moisture.

    One thing I like about spontaneous cooking is that I am not tied to a specific recipe, I can buy whatever looks good at the store. This week, the asparagus at the market looked sad, but the green beans looked good, so that’s what I bought.

    The method follows a general set of steps, but they are not hard and fast. The steps are:

    • Brown the protein and set aside.
    • Add aromatics to the pan. Aromatics are things like garlic, ginger, shallots, onions, celery and carrots.
    • Deglaze the pan and reduce the sauce by half
    • Extend the sauce
    • Finish (braise) the protein and vegetables.

    Babs: Laziest Line Cook
    Babs: Laziest Line Cook
    I am playing a little loose with the definition of a pan sauce by finishing the protein and vegetables in the sauce. A classic pan sauce stops at step 3, then adds cream or butter. But this is how I cook and it shows the versatility. I will demonstrate the method by making a pork chop with mushrooms and green beans in a mustard cream sauce.

    Start with your mise en place (French for put in place). I have a bunch of small glass bowls that I got at the dollar store. They are really useful, and I recommend that anyone who loves to cook get some. First, I wash and trim the green beans I think I will eat. I get some salted water boiling while I prepare the rest of the mise en place.

    Take a shallot and chop some fine and set aside. You’re cooking for one – so you don’t need much. The shallot you don’t use will be ok covered in the fridge for a few days. Mince a clove of garlic and set aside*. Next clean and slice a few mushrooms. By now the water should be boiling and I add the green beans and just cook until they are bright green. I then remove them and add to a bowl with ice water to stop the cooking. I will finish them in my sauce.

    Mise en place
    Mise en place

    Brown the pork chop on both sides but don’t cook it all the way through. Remove it from the pan and set aside. Add the shallots to the pan and let brown. Shallots brown much more quickly than onions which is why I am using them here. When the shallots are browned, add the mushrooms and garlic and cook until the mushrooms are browned and softened.

    Add Shallots and Mushrooms
    Add Shallots and Mushrooms

    Now start the sauce. Add a little white wine to the pan and swirl it around to deglaze the pan. Next, I add a little dijon mustard and some stock. Because I want this to be a cream sauce, I will add the chop and beans back to the pan now. Normally, I would wait until I extended the sauce, but I don’t want to curdle the cream.

    Deglaze and reduce
    Deglaze and reduce

    Once I add the chop and beans back to the pan, let the sauce simmer and reduce by at least half. Watch the beans and chop carefully and remove when they are done. You don’t want to overcook.

    Finish meat and beans
    Finish meat and beans

    Once the sauce is reduced to a syrup – if you coat the back of a spoon you should be able to draw a finger through it and leave a clean streak- it is ready. Add a dollop of cream, swirl and plate over the chop and beans. Garnish with a few slivered almonds.

    Add cream
    Add cream

    Done!
    Done!

    This type of sauce – wine, mushrooms, dijon mustard, is flexible. Swirl in a little butter instead of cream to create a classic sauce. You could also pan fry a steak and make the sauce with red wine and serve with mashed cauliflower.

    Other Variations:

    Another classic is a piccata sauce and it works well with pork, chicken or fish. Deglaze with white wine and add lemon juice. Reduce, then add some broth before returning the protein to the pan. Garnish with capers. I like to do that with chicken and asparagus.

    Chicken and Asparagus
    Chicken and Asparagus

    Another classic is the sauce for coq au vin. That uses a little bacon (when done, remove from the pan and crumble), add onions and mushrooms and deglaze with red wine.

    Chicken cacciatore uses wine, onions, peppers and tomatoes. Add onions and peppers as your aromatics, deglaze with wine and extend with tomatoes and their juice.

    Next time I’ll break down how I translate a recipe to my cooking method.

    * This is a LOT of garlic for a single serving, so I set some of the minced garlic aside for a dressing.

  • The Hodorscope for April 8, 2018

    By Not Adahn

    Hodor!  Hodor hodor hodor.  Hodor hodor hodor hodor.

    Hodor hodor hodor hodor hodor hodor hodor.

    Hodor…

    Hodor, hodor hodor hodor hodor hodor; hodor-hodor hodor hodor hodor hodor.

    Hodor hodor hodor.

    Hodor hodor hodor hodor hodor hodor hodor hodor hodor hodor hodor. Hodor hodor hodor.

  • Sunday Morning Links of Loathing

    My solace is found in the poetry of Don Marquis- and my thanks to Warty for reminding me.

    LEADER no more, be judged of us!
    Hailed Chief, and loved, of yore—
    Youth, and the faith of youth, cry out:
    Leader and Chief no more!

      We dreamed a Prophet, flushed with faith,
    Content to toil in pain
    If that his sacrifice might be,
    Somehow, his people’s gain.

      We saw a vision, and our blood
    Beat red and hot and strong:
    “Lead us (we cried) to war against
    Some foul, embattled wrong!”

      We dreamed a Warrior whose sword
    Was edged for sham and shame;
    We dreamed a Statesman far above
    The vulgar lust for fame.

      We were not cynics, and we dreamed
    A Man who made no truce
    With lies nor ancient privilege
    Nor old, entrenched abuse.

      We dreamed … we dreamed … Youth dreamed
    a dream!
    And even you forgot
    Yourself, one moment, and dreamed, too—
    Struck, while your mood was hot!

      Struck three or four good blows … and then
    Turned back to easier things:
    The cheap applause, the blatant mob,
    The praise of underlings!

      Praise … praise … was ever man so filled,
    So avid still, of praise?
    So hungry for the crowd’s acclaim,
    The sycophantic phrase?

      O you whom Greatness beckoned to …
    O swollen Littleness
    Who turned from Immortality
    To fawn upon Success!

      O blind with love of self, who led
    Youth’s vision to defeat,
    Bawling and brawling for rewards,
    Loud, in the common street!

      O you who were so quick to judge—
    Leader, and loved, of yore—
    Hear now the judgment of our youth:
    Leader and Chief no more!

    And some more news to depress follows.

     

    Fire in a New York skyscraper, and yes, the rabid mobs have found a way to politicize even that, and of course in the stupidest ways. Read the comments and despair of humanity.

     

    Is Syria a shithole or a real shithole? They report, you decide. We need to be as far away as we can be.

    Syria has called the allegations of a chemical attack a “fabrication” – as has its main ally, Russia.

    I fucking hate people.

     

    It’s guys like this who give my character a bad name. But I have to admit being a tiny bit amused by the denoument.

    KOKH reported that he approached a woman while she swept the floor of the establishment and handed her $10. When she told him that employees were not allowed to take tips, he grabbed her crotch and her backside before telling her he’d like to see her in some red lingerie that was hanging from a stand in the store. He was 82 at the time of the alleged offenses and turned 83 in February, when charges were filed against him in connection with the incident.

     

    What should the US role be in an Iran-Israel war? Answer: absolutely nothing, other than to sell weapons. For cash. But that wouldn’t have filled the article. Ah, well.

     

    This is… astonishing. Just astonishing. I’ve really never seen such unawareness and derp packed into one piece.

    The solution for the people of California was to reconfigure the political landscape and shift a supermajority of citizens — and by extension their elected officials — under the Democratic Party’s big tent. The natural continuum of more progressive to more moderate solutions then got worked out within the context of the only remaining functioning party. The California Democrats actually cared about average citizens, embraced the inevitable diversity of 21st-century society, weren’t afraid of real innovation, and were ready to start solving the many challenges of our time, including climate change.

     

    My only other solace today is Old Guy Music, in this case a performer I love but sadly never got to see. Insane trumpet, John the Baptist to Clifford Brown’s Jesus.

     

  • STEVE SMITH SAD OPEN LINKS

    STEVE SMITH BIG HOCKEY FAN. STEVE SMITH HEAR ABOUT THIS, AND IS TOO SAD TO POST LINKS….BUT WANT FUNNY GLIBERTARIAN PEOPLE TO HAVE PLACE TO TALK/COMMENT/POST.

     

    STEVE SMITH VERY SAD
  • The Holy Thursday Special!

    Sometimes humans have an unhealthy infatuation with things that are simply not normal.  This has been going on since we realized that people with odd deformities are not the result of demons residing in their bodies.  Nope, these people were just freaks.

    This is my review of Green Flash Le Freak Belgian Style IPA


    This was the first beer I picked up following my annual medieval self-punishment.  It’s fairly inexpensive, available in my area, and a hoppy Saison sounds compelling in a, “that simply isn’t natural” sort of way.  Why did I get it?

    As I said, freaks have been a draw for a long time.  The earliest of nature’s curiosities are believed to gain popularity during the 1600s.  Later on, travelling shows featuring such people began.  One example were the conjoined twins Lazarus Colleredo and John Baptista, who travelled Europe with, “female about four feet high in every part like a woman excepting her head which nearly resembles the ape.”

    One person many associate with freak shows is PT Barnum.  Who is credited with the infamous quote, “There is a sucker is born every minute.”

    Turns out this is misattributed to him. Barnum however, was the type of person that would embellish the truth and even engage in activities of questionable ethics in order to turn a profit:

    The nature of this exhibition showcases Barnum’s willingness to skirt controversy and behave in potentially unethical or immoral ways. What he purchased was a nearly paralyzed woman named Joice Heth. This woman, who was nearly 80 years old, was displayed as a 161-year-old ex-nurse of George Washington.

    Barnum was well aware that buying slavers was illegal in New York at the time. However, he used a slavery loophole that allowed him to lease her for a year. During this time, he would display this frail woman for up to 12 hours a day. As a result, Heth passed away a year later and left Barnum with no source of income. Thinking on his feet, he scheduled a live autopsy of her body and charged 50 cents (a hefty sum at the time) for people to watch.

    He was even credited with creating hoaxes.

    The Cardiff Giant – This infamous case was a hoax based on a hoax. In 1869, a large statue was dug up in New York, which the discoverer claimed to be the body of a 10-foot ancient man. It was claimed that this was one of the giants mentioned in the Bible. The creator of this hoax charged people 25 cents to view it, and people showed up in droves. After it was sold for $23,000 to another showman, Barnum built a giant and claimed that his giant was the real one. When the owner of the original statue tried to sue Barnum, the case was thrown out of court. This event was the origination of the “There’s a sucker born every minute” line, a quip that was spoken by the plaintiff in this case, not by Barnum.

    The world’s earliest known photo STEVE SMITH?

    More info on PT Barnum and his antics during the age of toxic capitalism gone wild, can be found here.

    Is this beer worthy of it’s moniker?  It has good body like nearly every Saison out there with a strong citrus flavor.  It uses copious amounts of Amarillo hops which aren’t as bitter, which seem to compliment rather than balance.  It’s definitely different, but freak might be going too far.  Green Flash Le freak Belgian IPA:  3.5/5

  • Saturday Morning Links of Return

    I go away for a week and everything goes to shit. The morning links are totally generic, Brett gets too drunk to do afternoon links and punts… The only bright spots were contributions from the Glibertariat, some really fine articles. But the staff links… no. I’m thinking that the Glibs staff really does need adult supervision. Well, dammit, I’m back and I’m not going to wuss on you.

    Before diving in, I wanted to mention a fascinating documentary that SP and I watched last night on Netflix, The Man Who Would Be Polka King, the story of Jan Lewan, a polka star who ran a Ponzi scheme (even managing to bribe the Vatican). Much better than Jaws. Three things jumped out at us, which may or may not have been intended. First, as always, the people who got taken were a combination of gullible and greedy. No one ever thought to question why someone offered them 12% (or later, 20%) interest on an investment in a market where 3-5% was the norm. The second thing was the question of why this is even a crime, rather than a civil tort (and as libertarians, our reactions were certainly, “Because government-as-Daddy”). And the third thing was that clearly the people who came across as the most evil and vindictive were the government folks- especially the ADA from Delaware who put a non-violent offender in a maximum security prison, later leading to his throat being slashed. Every time she appeared on screen, my skin crawled.

    OK, sorry, this isn’t supposed to be a movie review, but after last week’s debacle, I wanted to plug a film that actually was thought-provoking and had redeeming qualities beyond a hilariously awful rubber fish. And as a hat-tip to Sloopy, I’ll mention that the Orioles, despite looking like it’s going to be a long and sucky season, came into New York and hammered the Evil Empire twice.

    On the same theme as my mini-movie review, here’s more creepy government overreach. We can’t possibly have free markets or people might buy and sell things that Daddy doesn’t approve of. Plus extra vindictiveness. Really, the FBI should have been sunset out decades ago, and wiping their asses with the First Amendment is once again a demonstration that lust for power and control will always trump the oath to follow the constitution.

     

    The cut of this guy’s jib, I like it.

    ” … (H)he chose to take the gun out and put it on the table not knowing if any of us had mental health issues,” said Lori Carter, a schoolteacher from Charlotte, N.C., told the newspaper. “What was to prevent me from leaning across the table to take that gun?”

    Go ahead, Lori, give it a try. The consequences would be amusing.

     

    Why do I think that this will not turn out to be quite how the WaPo is positioning it? Am I overly cynical? Hahahahaha… no. In the meantime, the Palestinian version of Emma Gonzalez is working every angle she can. Good luck with that project.

     

    “Bernie beclowns himself” seems to be a consistent theme. Or is he just getting tax tips from Reverend Al? The outrage that resulted is truly the funniest part.

     

    I shouldn’t find this funny. But I do. Schadenfreude is not a pretty emotion, but I’m not a pretty guy.

     

    Before getting to Old Guy Music, I wanted to give a quick thanks to the KC area Glibs who joined me for a really nice evening, a welcome relief from my work tedium. That said, Old Guy Music, this time featuring the delightful Albanie Falletta, accompanied by one of my favorite bass players, Ryan Gould, and the superb J.D. Pendley on lead guitar.

     

  • SEA SMITH’S FRIDAY NIGHT LINKS

    HAPPY FRIDAY!

     

    SEA SMITH PROUD OF COUSIN STEVE SMITH. HE GET SLOOPY AND CHEESE PERSON BACK. SEA SMITH DO RESCUE BEFORE. PEOPLE NO TALK ABOUT SEA SMITH HELP. HE GET NO CREDIT…ALWAYS “CAUGHT A BIRD” OR “DRIFTED CLOSE ENOUGH TO SHIP TO BE RESCUED”. THAT OK, SEA SMITH NOT WANT TOO MUCH PUBLICITY.

    BUT SEA SMITH WANT MUCH LINKS! SO HE GIVE YOU LINKS FOR FUN FRIDAY NIGHT!

    • SEA SMITH NOTICE SOUTH KOREA PEOPLE KNOW HOW HANDLE POLITICIANS…PUT IN JAIL!
    • LOOK LIKE YOU MONEY GET TO BE FIRST AID KIT FOR FARM PEOPLE IN TRADE WAR. SEA SMITH GLAD HE PAY NO TAXES. HAMMERHEAD SHARKS TRY IMPOSE TAXES ONCE. SEA SMITH DISSENT. BY DISSENT, MEAN RAPE SHARKS.
    • SEA SMITH HOPE PIPELINE GO IN SEA. THEN SEA SMITH GET VISIT WITH DRILLING AND PIPELINE CREWS. MAKE NEW FRIENDS!
    • SEA SMITH WONDER “WHAT WRONG WITH NEW JERSEY PEOPLE“? SEA SMITH NO GO THERE – DID ONCE IN 1980S, AND GOT HIT ON HEAD WITH BARREL OF CHEMICALS GET FLY-DUMPED INTO OCEAN.

     

    SEA SMITH HOPE YOU HAVE FUN FRIDAY NIGHT. SEA SMITH GO SEE WHAT ROWDY FRIENDS (DOLPHINS) UP TO. SUSPECT IT IS RAPE. YOU KNOW DOLPHINS (AND SEA SMITH).