Hola a todos, Brett is in meetings all day, so he’s letting me take over for the afternoon.
California is still on fire, and a former nuclear research site got burned. Oops. Fires are currently burning across the mountain west with concentrated activity in Idaho/Utah/Nevada and just east of the Cascades, which is just crazy since everyone knows that California’s forestry management policies are causing the fires…across 8 states.
Floridian—who looks like every middle aged man I know who does local community theater—has a bunch of jihaddi preferred explosives “for homemade fireworks.” “‘The white crystal powder [TATP] has been referred to as ‘Mother of Satan’ by terrorist organizations who have used it in deadly attacks around the world,’ the Volusia County Sheriff’s Office said in a statement.”
Speaking of Florida, our solar system is apparently about to get rocked by a “dark matter hurricane” but you probably won’t notice much unless you have severe axion sensitivity along with your EMF and gluten sensitivity.
Lotta folks are on losartan thanks to the Western Pattern Diet, if you are one of those people, you might want to have a chat with your GP about this recall. In related news, the USG is *begging* you to at least take the stairs instead of your off-road-capable mobility scooter. The big take away is that even brief activity counts toward the backstop goal of 150 minutes of activity per week (a week is 10080 minutes) as recommended by the AHA.
Week 7 – Accountability, Correspondences, and Fearful Symmetry
No, I said Learned Man. Not Learned Hand.
Words have power. It’s true. Ask any wizard. Or any regulator. Speaking the true name of an object or an idea gives the learned man power over the object or the idea. It forges an instant and powerful connection. And all magic is based on connections. Some other connections are tied to blood or cast-offs from the body like hair and fingernails. That’s why I wash my hands exactly 36 times a day and scrub my body with a stiff brush till it turns red. Some connections are made in the before times. Trick the Gods once, and you’ll be feasting on meat while they are stuck with burned offerings.
Today’s topic is about harnessing the occult forces of Genealogy!
This power can be leveraged to work your will on the physical universe as well as the spiritual. But power always comes at a cost. Always. Value can not be created, only traded. To gain this power, you must simultaneously make yourself weak. To gain control of your body, you must turn it over to someone you are already tied to. To become more powerful, you must make yourself weak.
Look, I started reading occult texts the same semester that I that I took Statics and OO Design. The parallels between these things were a serious mind-fuck, but they exposed me to some simple truths. There are connections everywhere, and the symmetry is truly fearful.
Improving health requires making changes. Making changes is hard. To do hard things, you have to make yourself stronger. One way to make yourself stronger is to give up strength.
The techniques in this post require Cor 3, Life 3, but having an email address counts as sympathetic magick.
When I decided to get serious about making life changes for my health, I knew it was going to be hard and that I wasn’t up to the task. So to make myself stronger, I leveraged the most destructive force in my life: Catholic Guilt.
I told my brother about my plan. This is not normal. The relationships in family are mostly a tangle of emotional abuse from my parents and grandparents generation. The story of my generation is each of us breaking out of that web before our parents and aunts and uncles crawl over to drain us. But the link between my brother and me is strong and healthy. The link between my other two siblings is strong and healthy, too.
But even then, I rarely bared my soul to my brother. It’s not.. That’s not how my family operates. But I needed to be stronger, so I made myself weaker in front of my brother. I told him about my fear of dying early, before my kids are out of college or maybe even before they start. I told him about my fear of going under for bariatric surgery and never coming back.
This guy knew words have power.
But, of course, that was all part of the bargain. I gave him what was in my soul in exchange for power. After I laid this all out, I said I can’t do this without your help. I need you to stay on my case and take away my freedom to stop dieting. I will email you every weekend with an update on my health, and your job is to hound my ass to the gates of Hell if you don’t get it by Sunday evening. And if he doesn’t, then his kids grow up without an uncle.
See. Simple. I send some of the Catholic Guilt along the correspondence to him, and he sends it back to me when I need it. And I use that power to impose my will on reality.
Aleister Crowley, shown above, was totally a wizard.
And it works. The only food I’ve eaten in the last eight months that hasn’t been logged is whatever I ate after the I’m-too-drunk-to-use-a-cell-phone-or-remember-this-burrito part of my brother’s wedding earlier this year. And I have to do this logging, because I am incapable of lying to my brother–on account of the guilt I feel over using Catholic Guilt on him. And I need to be able to honestly tell him every weekend that this week I did everything by the book.
I can’t tell you how to work this magic yourself. True power is always about self exploration. But I can tell you there is a path, if you are willing to give up enough to follow it. It is the Logos, the word you speak to immanentise your own eschaton. Find someone who loves you enough to tell you that you are a fuck up when you are a fuck up. Aim them at the weakest part of you, and tell them that if you fall off the wagon, it is their job to put a pillowcase over your head and drag you back to the straight and narrow path.
Bonus 1 week challenge
Take an inventory of the challenges that are preventing you from reaching one of your health goals. Take an inventory of the people that love you. Tell one of them about your challenges, and ask them for help. Shit, I guess I can tell you how to work this magic yourself.
...is the essence of ultrarunning.
Hey! That's not ventriloquism but it is funny, at least to some.
Same with ultrarunning: it's not ventriloquism, but it is funny,
at least to some.
This article is a quickly written, poorly thought out, biased introduction to the hobby.
You ready?
Ready anytime you are!
Technically, an ultramarathon is any foot race longer than 26.2 miles. Typical ultra distances are 50k (31 miles), 50 miles, 100k and 100 miles. Marathons are, more often than not, done on roads, and conversely ultras are more often done on trails.
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People run for many different reasons. Ultrarunners tend to run because they like how they feel as they are running. Some people get into ultrarunning through more traditional running (e.g. track and field or cross country); others come into it through hiking (sometimes through through-hiking).
Did I mention that ultrarunning isn’t really running? The nomenclature can be confusing. Someone who has finished an ultramarathon may casually say, “I just ran [name of ultramarathon] ” when in reality that finisher spent a good portion of the time walking or hiking. I guess the boastful may be deliberately choosing a misleading word to make the accomplishment sound bigger, but ultrarunners use the same word when talking to other ultrarunners who know full well how much walking might be involved (depending on the “runner,” the course, and the conditions).
You don’t have to be Albert Einstein to do the math and figure that someone who completes a 100 mile “run” in 29 hours is not running all that time. In fact, some people do complete ultramarathons without running at all. More typical is the mid-packers strategy of hiking the uphills, and running the flats and gentle downhills, and standing still or even sitting when eating or using the bathroom. Yes, there are exceptions even to those rules testified by little wiggly lines in the sand.
Consequentially, “running” an ultramarathon can be easier (potentially *much* easier) than running a marathon. It’s a great sport for slackers. In the middle of a “race” you can just drop your dummy and stop for whatever reason. Lots of ultra race reports include pictures that were taken by the participants during the race. You can do this when “running” a marathon (and people do), but there is often a different mindset involved.
When someone runs a marathon for the first time, it is not uncommon for that race to be that runner’s first time running that long. Typical training plans for beginning marathon runners have the training go up to 20 miles, with race day being the only time that runner does the full distance. As such, people tend to underestimate how long it’s going to take. In addition to not being aware of just how quickly they may fall apart in the best of circumstances, there’s just enough new stuff going on that virgin marathoners tend to make a lot of mistakes (going out too fast is super typical), yet they cross the finish line and are overwhelmed by emotion when finishing their first marathon.
Anywhere from seconds to weeks after finishing, the disparity between the prediction and reality becomes unsettling, but when thinking about all the mistakes that were made, the next step people often take is to sign up for their second marathon, eliminate the mistakes and see a dramatic decrease in finishing time. However, just as the nascent marathoner didn’t realize how quickly things can fall apart on one’s first marathon, it’s as easy to over extrapolate the gains that one makes between one’s first and second marathon, leading to disappointment on the third.
Some people then fall into a trap and get a bit neurotic about their marathon finishing times. They put in big blocks of time training for an event and then if anything goes wrong (weather, family emergencies, work) they feel let down. They’re no longer running for the fun of running (if they ever did that; there are a lot of people who run their first marathon for reasons other than a love of running).
Marathon courses are typically measured to be exactly 26.2 miles long, because if they’re shorter they can’t be used to qualify for the Boston Marathon and if they’re longer then all the people who are trying to set new personal records (PRs) are going to avoid them.
Ultras, especially trail ultras, tend to be different. Often the distance of the course is an approximation; the “natural” starting and stopping points, due to where the trails are, might cause a 50 miler to be 53 miles. Whereas the presence of hills on a marathon course (unless it’s a downhill course) tend to turn away marathoners, elevation change on ultras is often seen as a way to change gears (i.e., walk!) or as a challenge. Additionally, weather (and fires) cause course re-routes, so not only is it hard to compare two different ultras of ostensibly the same size, it’s often hard to compare the same ultra from year to year. That helps break the PR-driven mindset.
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Did I mention the free drugs? Many people get the runners high when running long but not particularly hard (after years of training, so their muscles, joints and ligaments are all used to the effort). Just watch the portion of this video that has the black and white photos.
These people are about 60 miles into a very tough 120 mile event. Look at their eyes; those people are fucked up. Look at their smiles; those people are happy! Oh, sure, the tequila helps also. In addition to the endocannabinoids your body makes, ultra aid stations often have free beer, tequila or other spirits.
Ultrarunners tend not to take themselves very seriously. The Dahlonega Ultra Marathon Association (DUMASS)’s motto is “Poor Decisions Make for Better Stories.” The Javelina Jundred, a popular hundred mile race outside of Phoenix, has a major aid station named “Jackass Junction.”
Sure, some people bucket-list a particular distance or a particular race. Sometimes that turns into a one-and-done, but many people find that the slower pace, along with the camaraderie and feeling of freedom leads to a fun hobby that can be enjoyed for hours (sometimes days) at a time and done again fairly soon thereafter. This isn’t always obvious from the race reports and videos that people write and make, because it’s human nature to emphasize the grueling aspects or the problems that had to be overcome.
However, although ultramarathoning is still pretty tiny, it’s growing by leaps and bounds, primarily because it really is pretty fun (to some people) and it’s definitely a lot easier than it sounds.
CrossFit. For some the word conjures up visions of guys with man-buns doing an impossible gymnastic feat over and over again on a set of rings, or a girl in a sports bra who is THICC in all the right (or perhaps wrong) places blasting out heavy Olympic lifts in rapid succession. To many it’s a weird and masochistic form of exercising with a cultish following whose adherents refuse to shut up about it.
“A CrossFitter, a vegan, and an atheist walk into a bar. I know because they told me when they walked in.” H/T Dr. Fronkensteen
Stereotypes exist for a reason and far be it from me to defend how some CrossFitters act (much less what they choose to post on social media). That being said, I myself am an adherent to this weird libertarian workout cult and can say that, while I will not claim it is the end-all-be-all form of exercise, it does offer something that most conventional gyms and exercise programs do not.
Part I: A short and incomplete history
CrossFit methodology was developed in the early 2000’s by self-proclaimed “Rabid Libertarian” Greg Glassman. Appropriately for a libertarian, his physical appearance resembles a construction worker on the tail end of a three day bender rather than the founder of an internationally successful fitness movement.
Glassman was a gymnast in high-school who sought to get stronger than the competition by incorporating barbell lifting into his training regimen. He quickly realized that while training specialization might make his friends and competitors better in one particular activity, it often came at the expense of skill or strength in another and that when competing in varied activities and competitions he was often far better equipped than those who focused solely on their event or sport.
Fast forward to 2000 and he’s codified his “jack-of-all-trades” approach into the term known as “CrossFit” and is poised to unleash a fitness phenomenon on the world, complete with head bands, compression socks, copious amounts of loose chalk and pretentious FB posts. The fancy description of the goal of CrossFit goes something like this:
“greater work capacity across broad time and modal domains”
and
“Adherents train to enhance 10 key physical qualities: cardiovascular/respiratory endurance, stamina, strength, flexibility, power, speed, coordination, agility, balance and accuracy.”
Put more simply, the goal is to be “fit.” Strong? Yes. Endurance? You bet. Flexible? Yup. Fast? Uh-huh….. You get the idea.
Unlike many other popular forms of exercising CrossFit eschews specializing in one particular area and seeks to train an individual in all dimensions of fitness simultaneously. An avid marathon runner may have incredible cardiovascular/respiratory endurance but this often comes at the expense of muscular strength. A body builder may be incredibly strong but they are rarely flexible or possess the stamina for prolonged energy expenditure, and so on.
While this may have been a revelation in the fitness world circa 2000, it was by no means a “new” idea. In fact, 20th century fitness was founded on this approach. The CrossFit brand may be relatively new, the methodology however bears a striking resemblance to Georges Hébert’s “Natural Method” of the early 20th Century.
“A (Natural Method) session is composed of exercises belonging to the ten fundamental groups: walking, running, jumping, quadrupedal movement, climbing, equilibrium (balancing), throwing, lifting, defending and swimming.”
While their definitions of the dimensions of fitness do not perfectly align, their similarity is undeniable. The underlying belief is the same: being all-around fit makes you better equipped not only for survival, but life in general.
The 1970s gave us two trends that would turn the idea of what fitness is on its ear. The running boom and Arnold Schwarzenegger. These two divergent phenomena pushed people away from pursuing fitness itself as a goal and toward physical specialization. New marathons, half-marathons, 10Ks and 5Ks began to pop up across the country, not as a spectacle for the super athlete to compete in, but as something for the average person to aspire to do; participation levels spiked as never before. Soon you had a sizable portion of the population pursuing running only (or at least endurance sports only) and neglecting strength training almost entirely under the false assumption that it makes you “bulky” and “slow.”
One the other end of the spectrum you have Arnold Schwarzenegger, a physical specimen the likes of which the world has never seen. His muscles had muscles. His physique made Michelangelo’s David look like a pajama boy and his popularity redefined the international conception of what it meant to be “strong.” So begins the “gym rat” phenomenon of [mostly] men pumping themselves up in the gym, trying to look like Arnold, moving away from some of the old-fashioned barbell power lifting movements in favor or isolating muscle groups with exercises like curls, flys, bench press, military press, leg extensions, etc. The gym rats were almost as disdainful of cardio/endurance training as the marathoners were of strength training; “it makes you skinny” and “it kills muscle.” “Cardio” if done at all, was confined to a separate workout to be done one or two days a week for most gym rats.
Thus over the last forty years we see the average person faced with a false dichotomy; pursue endurance specialization or strength specialization, when in fact both approaches neglect at least half of what being “fit” is all about.
Fast forward back to the mid-2000s and enter Greg Glassman. New guy peddling an old idea. For the average person, “fitness” is the goal of exercise. Your average person does not exercise to compete in a specialized sport but to have a healthy and functional body. As A Leap at the Wheel put it in GlibFit 2.0, Son of Glibfit:
Fitness is the process of picking things up and putting them down, using excess energy in your diet to improve your heart, lungs, and muscles.
I would add that training your muscles and your heart and lungs need not be, and perhaps should not be, mutually exclusive; fitness is your body’s ability to perform work and that work must be done at the pace that the situation and environment demand.
Will your average person ever “need” to run 26.2 miles? Is there any point to being able to bench 400 lbs beyond being able to claim you can bench 400 lbs? Neither goal is a bad thing in and of itself, yet, hitting a certain run time or weight on a particular lift is often an arbitrary standard to judge one’s fitness. For the average person who is not a competitive athlete training for a specific event, the better standard may be to ask yourself:
Can I lift the heavy object off a child?
Can I climb out the window of a burning building, hang from the ledge and drop to the ground?
Can I pull myself back in that window if need be?
Can I sprint a half-mile down the road to get help?
If I’m in a situation where I need to defend myself or others with my body do I have the stamina to keep fighting for several minutes after the initial assault?
CrossFit came about to supply a demand in the fitness market for those who prioritize function over form and utility over aesthetic. It’s not the only way, much less the perfect way, it’s just a really good, and increasingly available way, to achieve physical utility. While a person’s individual physiology certainly plays no small part, committed CrossFitters often end up with a body type that resembles someone whom works hard outdoors for a living. For those of us attached to keyboards and chairs all day, that’s not a bad thing.
Some of you are asking by now “So what the hell is it exactly? What makes it so libertarian?” Good questions that will be answered in Part 2. Please let me reiterate this disclaimer; I do not claim CrossFit is the perfect form of exercise. While I believe in the methodology, its execution often falls victim to human nature and I intend to distinguish between good and bad trends within CrossFit in Part 3.
For now let me close by saying that its appeal, for me, is rooted in the libertarian virtue of self-reliance. Sure it’s nice to look good naked and know that I’m doing something good for my body, but below that at the core it’s about capitalizing on the body I’ve been given.
In a world that is increasingly dismissive and hostile to the idea of self-reliance, I sleep better at night knowing I am physically able to come to the aid of a family member or neighbor in a time of crisis. It’s about being confident that I’m at least somewhat prepared physically to respond to the unforeseen. The best analogy I can come up with: it’s akin to owning a firearm or a tool; my body does me little good if it’s neglected and rusty.
Some people then fall into a trap and get a bit neurotic about their marathon finishing times. They put in big blocks of time training for an event and then if anything goes wrong (weather, family emergencies, work) they feel let down. They’re no longer running for the fun of running (if they ever did that; there are a lot of people who run their first marathon for reasons other than a love of running).
