Category: Family

  • Poll: Siblings

    I’ve mentioned before that I come from a large family. How large? I’m one of nine siblings. Five male, four female. In three groups.

    I am the oldest daughter, and the middle child of the first group.  We have kids born in the 1950s, ’60s, ’70s, and 1980s. My youngest sibling is just two months older than Web Dom.

    There are whole, half, and step siblings in my family, but none of us use the modifier when describing the others. We all get along, there are no factions. One sister died as an infant; one brother died at 43. The rest of us persist.

    It’s really a pretty typical 19th century family structure…except my Mom just died a few years ago, and not in childbirth at age 30. My parents, though divorced, continued to get along very well, which was good since they worked at the same place and lived about ten miles apart in a very rural area. It would have been impossible to avoid each other. My Mom undertook fund raising for my step-brother’s medical bills when he was dying.  My step- and half-brothers helped my Mom with various “guy” projects. Mom was a guest at Dad’s new home for Thanksgiving on the occasions her side of the family wasn’t gathering.

    I’ve never really believed in the birth order stuff (make sure you read the section about sexual orientation). However, I will say that the “baby” of each group of siblings is very much like the stereotype. I, of course, am nothing like a middle child.

    Also, birth order has absolutely nothing to do with the success of romantic relationships. Most of my relationships have been with oldest male children. A couple of my husbands were middle children. The marriage that was is the best match was is with an oldest child.

    Tonight’s questions:

    1. Do you have siblings? (Side note: progressives are the only children of the political world.)
    2. If so, where are you in the birth order?
    3. How many sisters and how many brothers do you have?
    4. Do you get along with your siblings?
    5. Do you have a particularly strong bond with one sibling?
    6. Do you think birth order has had an impact on your personality and life?
    7. Have you had any inappropriate sexual contact with any of your siblings?
    8. Do you have photos?

    Discuss!

     

  • Liberty for Me, but Also for Thee

    Liberty for Me, but Also for Thee

    Philosophical consistency is an aspirational goal.  It is not, no matter how much we may want to believe in our own purity, something any of us will ever truly achieve.  Also, even if you drive a Prius your farts stink; you have to spring for a Tesla before they turn to perfume.

    It is easy to see the inconsistencies in the belief systems of people with whom we disagree (because they are all stupid and rude); it is much harder to recognize those in our own noble, and wise beliefs. Almost all of us here are small l libertarians.  I am a conservative leaning libertarian.  We yokels sometimes make jokes about capital “L” Libertarians being all about pot, Mexicans and ass sex which is our deliberately offensive shorthand for our belief that The Libertarian Party, (sorry I know it doesn’t really deserve a capital letter but how else do we distinguish between libertarians and Bill Weld?) campaigns exclusively on sexual liberation (which has been pretty completely achieved, and no you did not get a speck of credit from the progs), drug legalization (yay crony pot!), and open borders, to the exclusion of freedom of association, gun rights, and limiting the massive growth of government, which we see as the more significant issues.

    I set this all out as a starting point, because I am going to be examining one of my own prejudices and it helps to give some context about my belief structure.  In other words I studied law and philosophy and am now completely incapable of getting directly to the point.  Hell, just be glad I didn’t spend 5 pages defining every noun in this article.

    Up to this point you are probably thinking:  Pompous guy spouting above the fray platitudes, libertarian model II, Paulista edition, time to move to the comments, nothing interesting here.  But I am not writing this to signal virtue; I am writing this, and struggling with it, because I have realized (not for the first time) that I have a conflict in my beliefs, and one that I think quite a few people here share.  

    It has to do with everyone’s favorite non-acronym acronym.  That wonderful keyboard swipe that defines sexual politics, LGBTQ. I am not worried about the L, they take care of themselves just fine, the G, they aren’t even victims anymore, the B, doubled date chances and all, or even the Q (Hi Q thanks for the mammaries!), but I have a problem with the T.  Ok, I don’t really understand the Q, I mean literally, I do not understand what queer means if it is something not covered by the L, B, or G.  So back to that troublesome T.

    I believe that there are three phenomena lumped into that T, and that due to deliberate conflating of these phenomena, a great deal of misery is being created.  First, there are the physically intersex individuals.  That tiny minority who are born with some ambiguity in their sexual characteristics.  Second, there are those suffering from gender dysphoria.  Also a small minority, but in this case with a psychological disconnect between their otherwise normal physiology and their self perception.  Finally, there are those I think of as the snowflakes.  Generally young people who I believe identify as transgender either in confusion about their sexual desires, a search for victimhood, or just to dramatize teen angst.

    For the intersex folk out there I have nothing but compassion.  My only wish for them is that they find whatever role and path to happiness they can.  If that means surgery, hormone treatments, and selection of a gender, great; if it means some other path, also great.  For those with actual gender dysphoria my thoughts are more complicated.  I personally think that treating a psychological disconnect by changing the body is the wrong path, but it isn’t my place to decide what path someone else should take, so who cares what I think?

    For the snowflakes, less sympathy, a lot less. As with many snowflake issues the answer is that growing up is hard, but worthwhile, and I suggest they give it a try.  No, occasionally having a stereotypical feminine feeling does not a dysphoria make. You are not a lesbian woman trapped in a man’s body.     You are just a straight dude, even if you get off on wearing women’s clothes. Equally, if you are ok with your body, but want to engage in sex with another dude that is called being gay, it does not require surgery, hormones, or switching restrooms.   Just do what makes you happy, don’t harm other people and stop being so dramatic.

    And now you are all thinking:  Ok, what’s so contradictory about all this?  These are pretty bland, basic viewpoints on this issue, and even the part where I diverge from the sjw narrative I admit is none of my business so why bother to spout off? Aren’t I just being an angsty snowflake myself with all my dramatic “philosophical contradiction” nonsense?  BUT I AM SPECIAL DAMMIT!

    Well, there is a more controversial part of all this.

    What about the kids?  Pretty much anyone who claims to be libertarian is going to eventually come around to the idea that adults can make their own choices about hormones and surgery.  There may be some waffling about bathrooms, and we may think prisons, sports leagues and other sex segregated venues should go by biology, but it’s very hard to claim to be pro individual liberty and at the same time deny adults the right to make their own decisions about their bodies.  Children are a different thing. (Why will no one ever think of them!)

    Children do not have full autonomy.  Obviously, you cannot let a toddler, or grade-schooler, or even a middle-schooler  make all, or even most, of their day to day decisions.  A diet of soda, candy, and ice cream is unhealthy.  Spending all day playing Fortnite or hunting Pokemon is less productive than school (ok, maybe the kids are right on this one).  Vaccinations are actually a good thing, even if shots sting.  And, no, the dog does not want to be dressed as your caparisoned stallion and ridden to battle with the forces of evil over at Mikey’s house.  So, we all accept that children can rightly be prevented from doing as they wish.  

    We accept the concept of parental authority, and the idea that children’s basic right to liberty is in abeyance until some degree of maturation has occurred. (Or at least until they get big enough to be useful as cannon fodder.)  Very young kids have effectively no liberty, and as they get older they gradually get more autonomy until at some magic point they morph into adults and become free to go to hell in their own way, just like all of us.

    I have voiced the opinion that encouraging, or even allowing, children to take puberty blockers, or cross sex hormone treatments, is blatant child abuse.  Puberty blockers have permanent effects and the idea that prepubescent kids are developed enough to make permanent decisions, or even to decide that they are transgendered, as opposed to simply homosexual, or just unsure about their sexuality, is nonsense.  

    By definition, prepubescent kids are not sexually developed.  It is the rankest prejudice to say, “Oh, I know little Johnny is gay, or straight, or transgendered,” when little Johnny hasn’t hit puberty.  Manifestly all you can be basing that belief on are your stereotypes about how gay people, or straight people act. You see, prepubescents aren’t supposed to be engaged in sexual behavior (sorry OMWC), and sexual behavior is what actually defines you as gay, straight, bi or whatever the hell, and no, playing with dolls doesn’t mean little Johnny is gay, or a woman.

    Now, child abuse is a tough subject for libertarians and conservatives.  We can accept that children don’t have full autonomy, and default to the idea that therefore their autonomy devolves to the parents.  Since that leaves the parents effectively owning the liberty right of the child, we are skeptical about government involvement, but what about abuse situations?  If libertarian belief followed all the way left us with no way to stop parents from torturing, raping, or killing their kids, then libertarians would really be as evil as Vox says.  Fortunately, libertarian philosophy doesn’t have to take us there.  

    I think what saves us is the concept of a fiduciary.  Parents do own their children’s liberty rights, but they own them as fiduciaries.  In other words, they hold the right for the benefit of the child, not the parent’s own benefit, and Mommy and Daddy have a corresponding obligation to act in little Johnny’s interest.  So, no problem right?  If using puberty blockers is a bad idea, poorly justified, by inadequate evidence, ofpossibly nonsensical, gender confusion, with long term deleterious effects, then it is child abuse and should be illegal, just like any other permanent physical harm inflicted!

    That has been my belief and I have voiced it frequently.  Here is the problem:

    I support the right of crazy anti-vaxxers to refuse to get their kids shots.  I also got furious, along with most of the people here about Charlie Gard.  In other words I believe that medical decisions fall squarely within the parent’s role.  So, despite thinking transgender treatments for children are as stupid as the Flat Earth Society bragging that they now have chapters around the globe, and as evil as a Broward County election supervisor, I have to support the parent’s right to make this decision.  

    So, that leaves me with three possibilities:

    1.  Medical decisions must be subject to some test and the parents only get to make the ‘right’ decisions.

    The problem here is obvious.  What test?  Who decides?  Doctors? Judges? Every single case of puberty blockers being given involved a doctor, as did the decision to kill Charlie, which was upheld by the British courts.  So going this route doesn’t get me EITHER side of what I want.  When an answer requires the right top men, it is not a libertarian idea

    2.  Puberty Blockers are up to the parents and child, hopefully in consultation with doctors across a decent spectrum of understanding of the consequences, and I can sit quietly disapproving but shut up about it.

    3.  My thought process sucks and you all will let me know why I am stupid in the comments.

    Much as it pisses me off, I have to go with 2 here.  The unexamined life may not be worth living; but examining it mostly leaves you feeling a bit dirty.

  • 2nd Annual Glibertarians Feast of Thanksgiving Recipes

    [et_pb_section fb_built=”1″ _builder_version=”3.22″][et_pb_row _builder_version=”3.25″ background_size=”initial” background_position=”top_left” background_repeat=”repeat”][et_pb_column type=”4_4″ _builder_version=”3.25″ custom_padding=”|||” custom_padding__hover=”|||”][et_pb_accordion module_class=”my_accordian” _builder_version=”3.17.6″][et_pb_accordion_item title=”Happy Thanksgiving!” _builder_version=”3.17.6″ open=”on”]A note about the format for this post: I’ve added the recipes accordion style to avoid having multiple tabs open and to prevent having to scroll for miles to see them all. When you click on the + on the right side of an item, the previous item you were looking at will close. Depending on the speed of your connection, it may take a second for your browser to bring the new item to the top of the screen.

    Each item has a print button. You may save or print the recipe as a pdf, or just simply make it easier to have the one you want open on your mobile device without all the rest of the page clutter.

    I’ve included the recipes from last year’s post, but not a couple items that were narratives. You can read that post here.

    Enjoy these Thanksgiving recipes contributed by your fellow Glibs!

    Happy Thanksgiving!
    ~ SP
    [/et_pb_accordion_item][et_pb_accordion_item title=”A note on Thanksgiving wine pairings by Spudalicious” _builder_version=”3.17.6″ open=”off”]

    print as pdf

     

    I’m going to go through what I consider to be decent wine pairings for the traditional Thanksgiving meal.

    We’re talking turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes, a boatload of gravy, cranberry sauce and the token side dishes that only Aunt Martha eats.

    This is a high salt, high fat, carb rich environment. It can also be a wine killer. And turkey really doesn’t pair well with heavy wines. My overall suggestion is that you want a wine that can cut through all of that. Meaning, leave your high dollar Cabernets and your big, blousy, oak filled Chardonnays in the cellar. All they will do is add to the heaviness of the meal.

    White wines

    Light, crisp, aromatic, those are all descriptions to look for in a white wine pairing. One of my favorites is a dry Gewurztraminer. I’m not talking about the majority of the wines available that have too much residual sugar, I’m talking about a lighter in body, fruity, spicy dry white. A producer I would point to is Navarro Vineyards.

    Another white that would fit the bill is a dry Riesling. DRY people, DRY. Navarro also fits the bill quite well here. You could also go German and look for a Riesling in the Kabinett, or maybe the Spatlese category. It will depend on the producer.

    Sauvignon Blanc is also a good choice. Just keep an eye on the alcohol level. Some of the New Zealand brands would fit well, just don’t go too crisp and dry. You want to cut through the richness of the meal, not hack it to bits with a machete.

    If you insist on Chardonnay, go with one of the many unoaked versions now on the market. They are crisper and still maintain the Chardonnay flavor profile. Two to choose from would be Joel Gott and Mer et Soleil Silver Label. These are both in the $15-20 range.

    Rosé

    Avoid domestic producers. Almost all of them have too much residual sugar. Look to Rosés from the south of France, such as Provence, or Italy. They are dry and crisp and would be a good foil to the meal.

    Red wines

    As I mentioned earlier, avoid the Cabernet. Save it for Christmas Eve prime rib.

    Georges Debouf is a marketing genius. Around this time of year, Beaujolais Noeveau is released. It’s a young, fresh light red from France made from the Gamay grape. It goes well with heavy dishes. Traditional Beaujolais would also work well. Fruity and not too heavy.

    Pinot Noir. Love, love, love a good Pinot for Thanksgiving. This is my go to. Go with what you like but given what’s happened with the alcohol levels in Pinot Noir, I would avoid anything much above 14% and most preferably, below. Oregon Pinot would be a good choice here.

    Domestic Syrah these days are pretty much a variation on Pinot in structure. Stay away from the big alcohol versions and you should do okay. Sierra Foothills and some of the choices from Washington State should be just fine. As much as I would love to tell you to go with a Cote Rotie from France, I just don’t think this is the place for it.

    One big red that I have found does seem to work well on Thanksgiving is Zinfandel. Avoid the monsters over 15% alcohol and try and find something a little more balanced. Sierra Foothills is again a place to look to to fit the bill.

    What about the pumpkin pie?

    This is where the sticky white wines go. As long as your pie isn’t too sweet, this is the time to pour small glasses of late harvest Gewürztraminer, Riesling, Muscat, or a Sauternes. Again, go with a small pour. It’s the end of the meal and a few sips will be plenty to cap off the event.

    The other alternative to the above suggestions?

    Drink whatever you want. Box, jug, homemade, whatever. If it you like it and it makes you happy, go with it. It is, after all, Thanksgiving. A time to enjoy friends and family, and reflect on just how good we’ve got it compared to those poor saps who didn’t hit the lottery and get to be an American.

    [/et_pb_accordion_item][et_pb_accordion_item title=”Autumnal Cocktail from RC Dean” _builder_version=”3.17.6″ open=”off”]

    Autumnal Cocktail from RC Dean

    Not sure what the name of this one is, but the maple syrup makes it very autumnal.

    • 3 oz. Rye or bourbon (- I prefer rye for just about any cocktail)
    • 3/4 oz. Orange Juice
    • 1/3 oz. Lemon Juice
    • 3/4 oz Dark Maple Syrup
    • 4-6 dashes bitters (Angostura works, but I also like Woodford Reserve Bourbon Barrel)
    • Seltzer couple ounces
    • Orange garnish (optional)
    1. I originally saw this “stirred, not shaken”. In my experience, you may not get the maple syrup to fully dissolve by stirring, so I prefer to make this one in my trusty shaker (also, drinks with citrus are classically shaken). The RC Dean method is to put everything but the seltzer and garnish in a shaker, pour over ice, top with seltzer and garnish.
    2. Protip: if you add the seltzer to the shaker, you will get a spectacular mess, so don’t do that.


    [/et_pb_accordion_item][et_pb_accordion_item title=”DblEagle’s Aged Eggnog” _builder_version=”3.17.6″ open=”off”]

    DblEagle's Aged Eggnog

    • Dozen egg yolks (reserve the whites for something else)
    • 1 lb sugar
    • 1 pint half and half
    • 1 pint heavy cream
    • 1 pint whole milk
    • 1 cup rum
    • 1 cup cognac
    • 1 cup bourbon
    • 1 teaspoon nutmeg ( freshly grated is best)
    • 1/4 teaspoon (kosher) salt
    1. Beat egg yolks, sugar and nutmeg until falls off a whisk in a smooth ribbon
    2. Combine the dairy, booze and salt in different container
    3. Slowly beat the booze mixture into the egg mixture
    4. Store in glass container(s) for 2 weeks to 2 months* in refrigerator
    5. Serve in glasses with nutmeg (fresh is best) garnish

    * You can drink immediately (and I have) but the aging time enables the tastes to smoothly combine


    [/et_pb_accordion_item][et_pb_accordion_item title=”Artichoke Dip by jesse.in.mb” _builder_version=”3.17.6″ open=”off”]

    Artichoke Dip

    Use fresh dill because dried dill is for little bitches, as is spinach in artichoke dip…get that filler out of here!

    • 1 14 ounce can artichoke hearts (drained)
    • 1 8 ounce package cream cheese
    • 1 cup grated good Parmesan cheese
    • 1/2 cup mayonnaise
    • 1 clove garlic peeled
    • 1 teaspoon dill weed or to taste
    1. Preheat oven to 400F
    2. Process the artichoke hearts in a food processor until smooth.
    3. Add cream cheese, Parmesan, mayonnaise, garlic and dill to the artichoke mixture in the food processor and process until desired texture, but well blended.
    4. Spoon into a 9-inch pie pan.
    5. Bake 10 to 15 minutes, or until bubbly and light golden brown.


    [/et_pb_accordion_item][et_pb_accordion_item title=”SP’s Easy Dinner Rolls – Vegan (or Not)” _builder_version=”3.17.6″ open=”off”]

    SP’s Easy Dinner Rolls – Vegan (or Not)

    (Use the ingredients in the parentheses for Not Vegan)

    • 2 tbsp white sugar ((or honey))
    • 1/2 tsp salt
    • 1 2-1/4 tsp packet rapid-rise yeast
    • 2 cups unbleached all-purpose flour give or take – divided
    • 1/2 cup unsweetened plain almond milk ((or regular milk))
    • 1/4 cup water
    • 2 tbsp margarine and a bit more for finishing ((or butter))
    1. With a small whisk, combine the sugar, salt, yeast and 1 cup of flour in a small bowl.
    2. In a microwave safe bowl or measuring cup, heat milk, water, and margarine or butter to about 105F. If it’s too hot, let it cool a bit before using.
    3. Place the dry ingredients into the bowl of a food processor or stand mixer. With the machine running, pour in the liquid ingredients. Process or mix for 2 minutes or so. Scrape the bowl sides, add 1/2 cup more flour and beat or process until a soft dough forms, about 2 more minutes. The dough will be sticky, but should loosely hold its shape.
    4. If the dough is too soft, mix in the rest of the flour a tablespoon at a time until the dough is still soft but holds shape. Turn the dough out and let it rest on a floured surface, covered, for 10-15 minutes.
    5. Meanwhile, grease an 8-inch round cake pan. An actual 8-inch pan, not man “8-inches.”
    6. Divide the dough into 8-12 pieces and shape into rounds. (I am a little compulsive, so I weigh the dough to have rolls of the same size at the end.) Place the shaped rolls in the greased cake pan, cover and let rise until doubled, about 45 minutes.
    7. While the rolls are rising, preheat the oven to 375F.
    8. Bake the rolls for 20 minutes or until nicely browned. If you wish, brush the top of the rolls with a little melted margarine or butter. Serve pretty close to immediately.

    And you thought you couldn’t bake yeast breads from scratch!


    [/et_pb_accordion_item][et_pb_accordion_item title=”Tulip’s Mother’s French Landlady’s Bread Recipe” _builder_version=”3.17.6″ open=”off”]

    Tulip's Mother's French Landlady's Bread Recipe

    This no fuss recipe is what a French housewife actually made. To make the recipe even easier, my mother, who is in her 80s, uses a food processor to mix the dough. Just be careful not to over work it. I get better results with the spoon. If you over work it, you don’t get the air pockets.

    • 1/2 c scalded milk
    • 1 c water
    • 1 1/2 T sugar
    • 1-1/2 T butter
    • 1/4 c additional warm water
    • 1 pkg yeast
    • 4 c flour
    • 2 tsp salt
    • 1/2 T sugar
    1. Add 1 c water, butter and sugar to scalded milk.
    2. Cool to lukewarm.
    3. Add 1/4 c water and yeast. Rest 10 minutes.
    4. Add flour salt and sugar. Beat 100 strokes with wooden spoon.
    5. Let rise 2 hours.
    6. Cut into 2 and shape into loaves.
    7. Put loaves on greased sheet and sprinkle with cornmeal. Slash tops and let rise 30 minutes or more.
    8. Bake at 400 for 15 minutes then at 350 for 30 minutes more.

    It is not as good as what you get with a poolish, but adding steam during the bake gets the flaky crust. It is also easy easy easy, so worth it. I use it as a canvas – so easy to change to a honey wheat or oatmeal etc. I also think of it as truly authentic.

    My favorite variation is sub 1 cup oatmeal for 1 cup flour and replace the sugar with brown sugar. Put the oatmeal in a bowl with the butter and brown sugar. Pour the scalded milk over the oatmeal and let cool to lukewarm. Then continue as normal.


    [/et_pb_accordion_item][et_pb_accordion_item title=”Jennifer Reese’s Cornbread – contributed by jesse.in.mb” _builder_version=”3.17.6″ open=”off”]

    Jennifer Reese's Cornbread

    • 6 tablespoons 3/4 stick unsalted butter
    • 1 cup all-purpose flour
    • 1 cup white or yellow cornmeal (whatever grind you like)
    • 1/2 cup sugar
    • 4 teaspoons baking powder
    • 1 teaspoon kosher salt
    • 2 large eggs
    • 1 cup milk
    1. Preheat the oven to 375°F. Put the butter in a 10-inch pie plate and place it in the oven to melt.
    2. Mix the flour, cornmeal, sugar, baking powder, and salt in a large bowl. In a smaller bowl, whisk together the eggs and milk.
    3. When the butter has melted, take the pie plate out of the oven and swirl the butter around to coat the pan.
    4. Let it cool for 1 or 2 minutes, then pour the butter into the milk-egg mixture. Whisk to combine.
    5. Whisk the liquid into the dry mixture–not too strenuously. A few lumps are okay.
    6. Pour into the pie plate and bake for 25 minutes. When it is done, the bread will be slightly puffed and a toothpick inserted in the middle will come out clean.
    7. Serve immediately. Leftovers keep for a few days, covered, at room temperature.


    [/et_pb_accordion_item][et_pb_accordion_item title=”Semi-Spartan Dad’s Cranberry Compote” _builder_version=”3.17.6″ open=”off”]

    Semi-Spartan Dad's Cranberry Compote

    These are simple recipes that are easy for anyone to reproduce. I don’t use measurements when cooking so these are just estimates. The recipes have been cobbled together from various sources over the years, including online sites, but I can’t remember where to give credit or where I modified. I set up a buffet of warming trays and my recipes are all portioned for the half-size trays (gravy excluded).

    1. Put (3) 1-pound bags of whole cranberries into large saucepot.
    2. Add 1.5 cup of orange juice, 2-1/4 cup sugar, nutmeg, pinch of cinnamon and salt.
    3. Start on high heat, once boiling- cover and turn down to simmer.
    4. Cook 30-35min and stir every 10 minutes. Turn heat off and let sit with cover for 20-25 min.
    5. Pour into tray and place in the fridge.


    [/et_pb_accordion_item][et_pb_accordion_item title=”Spudalicious’s Cranberry Sauce” _builder_version=”3.17.6″ open=”off”]

    Spudalicious's Cranberry Sauce

    1. One bag cranberries, one cup sugar, one cup orange juice and some orange zest.
    2. Bring to a simmer and cook until the berries pop.


    [/et_pb_accordion_item][et_pb_accordion_item title=”westernsloper’s Candied Jalapenos” _builder_version=”3.17.6″ open=”off”]

    westernsloper's Candied Jalapenos

    There was a place in Phoenix (can’t remember the name) that topped one of their burgers with candied japs and it was great. I had to try and duplicate it and this is what I came up with.

    • 10 japs sliced
    • 6 baby carrots sliced longways into 1/4’s
    • 1 c water
    • 1/2 c White Vinegar
    • 1/2 c Apple Cider Vinegar
    • 1-1/2 c sugar
    1. Bring liquid to boil, add sugar and dissolve.
    2. Add japs and simmer/slow boil/reduce until mixture is bubbly and thick (couple hours or so).
    3. Jar it up and refrigerate. Top burgers, pulled pork, anything.

    SP’s note: I bet this would be killer on a leftover-turkey sandwich!


    [/et_pb_accordion_item][et_pb_accordion_item title=”KibbledKristen’s Ma’s Grape Juice Mold” _builder_version=”3.17.6″ open=”off”]

    KibbledKristen's Ma’s Grape Juice Mold

    • One box lemon gelatin
    • One box raspberry gelatin
    • 16 oz. one bag frozen unsweetened raspberries
    • 1 brick of cream cheese
    • 1 1/2 cups grape juice
    • 1/2 cup boiling water
    • ~2 tbsp sugar
    1. Coat a standard loaf pan with cooking spray.
    2. Place raspberries in a wire strainer over a large bowl and sprinkle sugar on top. Allow to thaw completely, tossing occasionally. Reserve juices.
    3. Bloom/dissolve lemon jello in boiling water (approx. 5 minutes). Add cream cheese and grape juice to blender. After jello is bloomed, crank blender to high and slowly pour in lemon jello while blender is running. Pour into loaf pan. Cover and refrigerate until jello is firm set.
    4. Add water to reserved raspberry juice to equal 1 3/4 cups (sometimes I go to 1 1/2 cups if the raspberries are particularly juicy). Nuke juice/water to just shy of boiling. Add raspberry jello and stir until dissolved. Gently stir in thawed raspberries.
    5. Cover and refrigerate raspberry jello until is it cool and egg white consistency. Pour/spoon raspberry jello over lemon jello/cream cheese in loaf pan. Cover and refrigerate at least 2 hours.
    6. Slice with a spatula and serve over a leaf of Bibb lettuce.


    [/et_pb_accordion_item][et_pb_accordion_item title=”24 Hour Salad by Hayeksplosives” _builder_version=”3.17.6″ open=”off”]

    24 Hour Salad by Hayeksplosives

    Stays good for days, even after tossing. Great with Thanksgiving leftovers.

    • 6 cups chopped lettuce 2-3 Romaine or one large iceberg (divided in half)
    • 1 teaspoon sugar
    • 1 teaspoon salt and pepper
    • 6 hard-boiled eggs sliced
    • 1 10- oz pkg frozen green peas thawed
    • 2 stalks celery chopped
    • 1 small can sliced black olives drained
    • 1 lb bacon cooked (drained and crumbled)
    • 16 ounces swiss or cheddar cheese (shredded. I usually chop pre-sliced swiss.)
    • 3/4 cup mayonnaise
    • 1/2 cup sour cream
    • 1/4 cup green onion chopped
    1. Place 3 cups lettuce in bottom of large glass bowl. (Doesn’t need to be glass, but it makes for a nice layered presentation before tossing.)
    2. Sprinkle with sugar, salt, and pepper.
    3. Layer eggs over lettuce, lining up a few around the edge of the bowl for looks.
    4. Layer peas, celery, olives, remaining lettuce, bacon, and cheese.
    5. Whisk together mayo and sour cream. Spread over top, sealing to edge of bowl.
    6. Sprinkle green onions over the top.
    7. Chill for 24 to 48 hours.
    8. Toss. Add a little cream or water if needed to thin dressing.
    9. Make additions/substitutions as desired.


    [/et_pb_accordion_item][et_pb_accordion_item title=”Web Dom’s Bean Salad” _builder_version=”3.17.6″ open=”off”]

    Web Dom's Bean Salad

    • 1 15 oz can black beans
    • 1 15 oz can garbanzo beans
    • 2 15 oz cans dark red kidney beans
    • 1 15 oz can great northern beans
    • 1 pkg frozen corn
    • 1 pkg frozen peas
    • 1 large white onion chopped

    Dressing

    • 3/4 c olive oil
    • 2-1/2 tbsp apple cider vinegar
    • 2-1/2 tbsp white wine vinegar
    • 1 tsp balsamic vinegar
    • 1-1/2 tbsp maple syrup can be omitted
    • 1/2 tsp celery salt
    • 5 cloves garlic grated on a Microplane
    • 1/2 tsp black pepper freshly ground
    • salt (to taste)
    1. Drain and rinse beans.
    2. Combine with onion, peas, and corn in a large glass bowl.
    3. Make the dressing to taste, adjusting the vinegars, etc., as needed.
    4. Pour dressing over the veg.
    5. Mix well and chill before serving.


    [/et_pb_accordion_item][et_pb_accordion_item title=”Celeriac Gratin by OMWC” _builder_version=”3.17.6″ open=”off”]

    Celeriac Gratin by OMWC

    Celeriac (celery root) is the red-headed stepchild of winter root vegetables. Yet this is a dish that Spudalicious and I used to make on the regular, and our non-vegetarian friends would start demanding it in advance. I can’t ever recall having leftovers. It features Raclette cheese, the pride of Switzerland. Gruyère will work but not be nearly as fun-funky. Take the trouble to find Raclette, and the Swiss kind is slightly better than French for this. Yes, this recipe makes a lot of pots to clean up, but that’s why God invented dishwashers and orphans. It’s worth it, trust me.

    • 2 lbs celeriac peeled and cubed (peeling is a pain in the ass, but necessary)
    • 2 lbs Yukon Gold potatoes ( peeled and cubed)
    • 1 c heavy cream
    • 1/2 c butter
    • 1/2 – 1 tsp saffron depending on your bank balance (it's definitely cheaper in Indian groceries than at Whole Foods)
    • 2 cloves garlic finely minced
    • 1-1/2 c Gruyère grated
    • 1 c Raclette grated
    • Salt and pepper
    • 1/2 c Italian flat-leaf parsley (chopped)
    1. Boil the celeriac in salted water until it’s soft (check by piercing with a skewer or paring knife). Scoop out and drain. Return the water to a boil and add the potatoes, cooking until they’re soft. Drain.
    2. While the potatoes cook, heat the cream until it boils, then stir in the butter, saffron, and garlic. Reduce the heat, then simmer for 5 minutes until the saffron is extracted and the mixture slightly thickened. Set aside.
    3. In a large bowl, puree the celeriac (you could use a food processor; I prefer a hand-held Braun immersion blender), while gradually adding the cream sauce. Mash the potatoes coarsely, or use a ricer if you want a smoother texture. Combine the potato, celery root, and one cup of the Gruyère; season to taste with salt and pepper.
    4. Spread the mixture in a greased oven-proof dish, top with the remaining cheese and the parsley, then bake in a preheated 400F degree oven until the top is browned, about 20-30 minutes.

    Wine pairing would include crisp whites like Seyval (Bully Hill makes an excellent and inexpensive one). Chardonnay from Macon or (if you’re lucky) Beaujolais is a superb match as well. I would not fart in your general direction if you defaulted to a dry Vouvray, which might be easier to find.


    [/et_pb_accordion_item][et_pb_accordion_item title=”Mom Lachowsky’s Chile Cheese Grits” _builder_version=”3.17.6″ open=”off”]

    Mom Lachowsky's Chile Cheese Grits

    • 3 cups water
    • salt
    • 1 garlic clove minced
    • 1 cup quick-cooking grits
    • 1/2 cup butter cubed
    • 1-1/2 cups shredded cheddar cheese
    • 3 tablespoons chopped green chilies
    • 2 eggs
    • 1/2 cup milk
    1. Bring water, salt and garlic to a boil in a pan, then stir in grits.
    2. Reduce heat; cook and stir for 3-5 minutes or until thickened. Remove from the heat.
    3. Add butter, 1 cup cheese and chilies; stir until butter melts.
    4. Beat eggs and milk; add to the grits and mix well.
    5. Pour into a greased baking dish and then bake, uncovered, at 350° for 45 minutes.
    6. Sprinkle with remaining cheese and serve.


    [/et_pb_accordion_item][et_pb_accordion_item title=”Semi-Spartan Dad’s Pecan Glazed Sweet Potato Casserole” _builder_version=”3.17.6″ open=”off”]

    Semi-Spartan Dad's Pecan Glazed Sweet Potato Casserole

    These are simple recipes that are easy for anyone to reproduce. I don’t use measurements when cooking so these are just estimates. The recipes have been cobbled together from various sources over the years, including online sites, but I can’t remember where to give credit or where I modified. I set up a buffet of warming trays and my recipes are all portioned for the half-size trays (gravy excluded).

    1. Roast 5 large sweet potatoes in oven for 1.25 hours @ 375F

    2. Mix sweet potato, 1/2 cup brown sugar, 2 beaten eggs, 1/2 teaspoon salt, 4 tbsp butter, 1/2 cup milk (cut with cream), 1/2 tsp vanilla extract, cinnamon. Place in baking dish.
    3. For topping: Mix 1/2 cup brown sugar and 1/3 cup flour. Cut 4 softened tbsp butter in until mixture is course. Stir in 1/2 cup chopped pecans.
    4. Layer topping over sweet potatoes. Bake 30 min @325F.


    [/et_pb_accordion_item][et_pb_accordion_item title=”Chipping Pioneer’s Party Potatoes” _builder_version=”3.17.6″ open=”off”]

    Chipping Pioneer's Party Potatoes

    • 1 bag frozen hash brown potatoes little cube form (thawed)
    • 1/2 c butter (melted)
    • 2 c cheddar cheese (grated or your choice – – something smoked is good)
    • 1/2 c chopped onion
    • 2 c full fat sour cream (I cannot stress to the wife enough how low fat sour cream is inadequate yet there it is in the refrigerator)
    • 1 tsp salt
    • 1 tin cream of chicken soup
    1. Preheat oven to 350F.
    2. Mixed thawed potatoes with melted butter.
    3. Add remaining ingredients and mix well.
    4. Spread in a greased 9×9 casserole dish.
    5. Bake 1 hour at 350.


    [/et_pb_accordion_item][et_pb_accordion_item title=”Mashed Potato Croquettes by Nephilium” _builder_version=”3.17.6″ open=”off”]

    Mashed Potato Croquettes by Nephilium

    • 3-4 lb. potatoes
    • 8 oz. butter
    • Salt and pepper to taste
    • Panko

    Optional:

    • 4-6 strips of bacon (cut into lardons [small pieces] and fried)
    • 2-4 oz. shredded Cheddar cheese
    • 1/4-1/2 tsp. Roasted Garlic powder or crushed rosemary
    1. Cut the potatoes into equal sized pieces, and boil in salted water until fork tender (approximately 20 minutes). Mash the potatoes with the butter, salt, pepper, and any other optional ingredients. Let the mashed potatoes cool to the touch. Then roll them into approximately 1-2″ balls (or cylinders), and coat in panko.
    2. You have several options to finish them, you can either freeze them and then deep fry them (if you’re already deep frying your turkey), or you can oven roast them at ~350 F for 30-45 minutes (or until golden brown). If you’re baking them, and want them to get more golden, you can mix in a couple of drops of oil into the panko (you want it barely damp, not wet).

    For the optional ingredients, do what ever flavors you want. Chorizo, Garlic, Cheddar, Bacon, Pancetta, Rosemary, Pepper jack, Sour Cream, Chives, Chipotle pepper are all valid options. Just remember you don’t want the potatoes too loose, and if you’re deep frying them, you may want to wrap the potatoes around any cheese to seal it in.


    [/et_pb_accordion_item][et_pb_accordion_item title=”DblEagle’s Zucchini Strudel” _builder_version=”3.17.6″ open=”off”]

    DblEagle's Zucchini Strudel

    • 6-8 decent sized squash all zucchini or mix with yellow squash depending on your garden and taste
    • 8 eggs
    • dill
    • black pepper
    • 3-6 cloves garlic (minced)
    • 8 oz feta cheese
    • phyllo dough
    • melted butter
    1. Preheat oven to 350F.
    2. Grate squash.
    3. Layer into a strainer with salt between layers.
    4. Let drain 3 hours.
    5. In a bowl mix: Eggs, dill, black pepper and garlic. (Don’t be shy with the dill or garlic).
    6. Crumple feta cheese into the egg mixture.
    7. Mix the ingredients.
    8. Return to the squash. Squeeze the fluid out handful by handful (generally 2X per handful since drier the better).
    9. Add squash to egg mixture and mix well.
    10. Pour into baking pan/casserole pan.
    11. Cover the mix with 5-8 pieces of phyllo dough, covering dough with melted butter between layers.
    12. Bake at 350 for one hour.
    13. Serve hot or cold.


    [/et_pb_accordion_item][et_pb_accordion_item title=”Semi-Spartan Dad’s Stuffing/Dressing” _builder_version=”3.17.6″ open=”off”]

    Semi-Spartan Dad's Stuffing/Dressing

    These are simple recipes that are easy for anyone to reproduce. I don’t use measurements when cooking so these are just estimates. The recipes have been cobbled together from various sources over the years, including online sites, but I can’t remember where to give credit or where I modified. I set up a buffet of warming trays and my recipes are all portioned for the half-size trays (gravy excluded).

    1. Get 1.5 loaves of French or Italian bread, cut in half, dice into cubes
    2. Toss cubes in bowl with melted butter, olive oil, and seasoning (pepper, salt, sage)
    3. Put in oven on sheet tray for about 15 minutes
    4. Toss cubes in large bowl with salt, pepper
    5. Add sautéed green onions and mushrooms
    6. Add chicken broth to moisten bread (maybe cup and half)
    7. Place in casserole dish and bake in oven for 35-40 minutes @ 350F


    [/et_pb_accordion_item][et_pb_accordion_item title=”Semi-Spartan Dad’s Gravy” _builder_version=”3.17.6″ open=”off”]

    Semi-Spartan Dad's Gravy

    I don’t use measurements when cooking so these are just estimates. The recipes have been cobbled together from various sources over the years, including online sites, but I can’t remember where to give credit or where I modified.

    1. Add giblets to sauce pot with a couple celery stalks, few carrots, half an onion, bay leaves, and parsley.
    2. Fill to top with cold water and simmer while the turkey cooks. Replenish as the liquid cooks down but not close to the end as doing so dilutes the flavor
    3. If roasting a turkey, pour everything in turkey roasting dish through a strainer into new, clean stockpot. If not roasting, there should still be plenty in the giblet stockpot.
    4. Pour the giblet stockpot through strainer into said stockpot (use back of spoon to work through strainer)
    5. Taste, now is the time to add salt and pepper, if needed, and a heavy dose of sage
    6. Use beurre manié or corn starch slurry (1:1) to thicken
    7. Thicken with whisk at slightly below boiling
    8. Place gravy pot in cast iron pan to keep warm


    [/et_pb_accordion_item][et_pb_accordion_item title=”Playa Manhattan’s Superior Turkey & Gravy” _builder_version=”3.17.6″ open=”off”]

    Playa Manhattan's Superior Turkey & Gravy

    If you’re roasting your turkey whole, you’re doing it wrong.

    1. Dark meat: Dry rub and rest for 6 hours. Tightly wrapped in foil, 300F for 6 hours.
    2. White meat: 2 day brine in pineapple juice, MSG and friends, citrus peel, sodium phosphate 10%, smoked salt, peppercorns, and powdered bay leaf. Sous Vide at 145F for 3 hours, 5 minute sear at the end.
    3. Gravy: 1 container Empire Kosher Chicken fat, 2/3rds cup flour. Cook to blonde roux. Add 3 cups rich unseasoned veal stock, whisk in. Seasoned with onion salt, yeast extract, MSG and helpers, and a touch of garlic powder. Skim unincorporated fat from the top.

    I’m pretty comfortable serving this to 30 people next week.


    [/et_pb_accordion_item][et_pb_accordion_item title=”How To Roast a Stuffed Turkey by Count Potato” _builder_version=”3.17.6″ open=”off”]

    How To Roast a Stuffed Turkey by Count Potato

    Based on casual observation most people do it wrong. They try using bacon, aluminum foil, etc. to keep the bird from drying out. Or they soak it in brine which alters the taste and consistency of the meat. Whereas the best way is to keep the natural juices inside the turkey from the beginning.

    1. Get a covered roasting pan with a rack. Mine has a tight-fitting lid with an adjustable vent.
    2. Preheat the oven to 325°F.
    3. Find out how much the turkey weighs. If you bought from a store, it will be written on a label on the package. Otherwise, weigh it on a scale.
    4. Wash, dry, and stuff the turkey. Make sure to sew the neck and tail openings shut. Season it with salt and pepper. I also rub the outside with a mixture of dried herbs. The important thing is that the skin is well-salted.

    5. Place the bird on the rack in the pan. Then pour in a quart of low-salt stock or broth. I used to use chicken stock before turkey broth became widely available.
    6. Cover it with the lid. Put it in the oven.
    7. Estimate the total cooking time by multiplying the weight in pounds by 20 minutes. Leave it in the oven for half that time without opening the lid. No peeking.
    8. After half the total estimated cooking time has passed, remove the lid. Don’t be dismayed if the turkey “looks boiled”. It’s because it will be covered in a whitish pellicle. This is a coating of fat and proteins that will waterproof the bird like Flex Seal. This was demonstrated by the Indians at the first Thanksgiving by sawing a canoe in half.
    9. If you use a thermometer, stick through the center of one of the breasts while being careful not to touch any bone. Put it back in the oven uncovered. Do not baste it until the skin begins to turn golden brown. When it’s done, the legs should move freely, and there shouldn’t be a large amount of liquid pooled around the thighs. You can check by taking a thin knife and cut above where the thigh attaches to the back — there shouldn’t be any pink flesh or red blood around the joint.
    10. After you remove it from the oven. Let it sit for 15 – 20 minutes before carving. I move it to a dish, so I can make gravy from the roasting pan during this time.
    11. Osteoporosis!


    [/et_pb_accordion_item][et_pb_accordion_item title=”Deep Fried Turkey by mexicansharpshooter” _builder_version=”3.17.6″ open=”off”]

    Deep Fried Turkey by mexicansharpshooter

    This is a dangerous but delicious dish to make.

    • 20 lbs Turkey

    For the brine

    • 1 gallon water
    • 1 gallon broth doesn't matter what kind (chicken broth is plentiful and cheap)
    • 2 cans kosher salt
    • 1 jar whole cloves
    • 2 lemons
    • 2 pkgs fresh rosemary (You can substitute dried, but why cheap out?)
    • ginger root (You can use candied ginger, but I like to shred it and throw it in the brine. Get as much as you dare.)

    For frying

    • 2 gallons peanut oil (minimum – see instructions)

    The brine

    1. Mix the brine and let the thawed turkey soak in it at least overnight, the longer the better. I normally go 2 nights.

    The fryer

    1. Incidentally, Underwriters Laboratory does not place their coveted seal on any gas fired turkey fryer. This is a dangerous item to have, and can result in serious injury if you are not careful. Especially if you are like me and know how to bypass the thermocouple that acts as a safety device but prevents the oil from getting hot enough. If you are faint of heart—just roast it like the Nancy Boy you are and take up valuable oven space.

    The process

    1. Now that we got that out of the way. You will need a minimum of 2 gallons of peanut oil. Prior to brining, you will need to establish the turkey’s overall displacement by filling the pot with water and marking where the turkey rests in the pot completely submerged. This may exceed the “Do not fill above this line” written inside the pot, but if you made it this far, you probably are ignoring the safety people anyway.
    2. Remove the bird from the brine, and let it dry. A wet turkey will cause you to have a very bad day, and will prove the Nancy Boys at UL right. Don’t do that.
    3. Set the bird in the stand butt down, wings tucked back. Put it in the pot of hot oil SLOWLY.
    4. Ideally, the oil should average around 175F (I can’t help you if you are in Canada), but remember the turkey is cold and will drop the temperature of the oil once you set it in there. I’m usually able to keep it between 150-165F without setting my yard on fire. 3 1/2 minutes per pound should net a result that is moist on the inside, and delightfully crisp skin in the outside. This needs to sit at least 30 mins before carving.


    [/et_pb_accordion_item][et_pb_accordion_item title=”Brown Sugar Cookies from Nosh with Me – contributed by jesse.in.mb” _builder_version=”3.17.6″ open=”off”]

    Brown Sugar Cookies from Nosh with Me – contributed by jesse.in.mb

    • 14 tablespoons unsalted butter (1 3/4 sticks)
    • 1/4 cup granulated sugar (about 1 3/4 ounces)
    • 2 cups packed dark brown sugar (14 ounces)
    • 2 cups unbleached all-purpose flour plus 2 tablespoons ( about 10 1/2 ounces)
    • 1/2 teaspoon baking soda
    • 1/4 teaspoon baking powder
    • 1/2 teaspoon table salt
    • 1 large egg
    • 1 large egg yolk
    • 1 tablespoon vanilla extract
    1. Heat 10 tablespoons of the butter in a pan over medium-high heat until melted. Continue to cook the butter until it is browned a dark golden color and smells nutty, about 1 to 3 minutes. Transfer the browned butter to a bowl and stir the rest of the butter into the hot butter until it melts- let this rest for 15 min.
    2. Preheat oven to 350 degrees F. In a baking dish, mix granulated sugar and a ¼ cup of the brown sugar until combined well; set this mixture aside to roll dough balls in.
    3. Mix flour, baking soda, and baking powder in a bowl. Add 1 ¾ cup brown sugar and salt to cooled butter and mix until there are no lumps. Add egg, yolk, and vanilla to butter mixture and mix well, then add flour and mix until just combined.
    4. Roll dough into balls about 1 ½ inches in diameter, and roll balls in brown sugar and white sugar mixture. Place balls about 2 inches apart on parchment lined baking sheets.
    5. Bake sheets one at a time until cookies are puffy and lightly browned, about 12-14 minutes. (It says the cookies will look slightly raw between some of the cracks and seem underdone, but be careful not to over bake.) Cool on sheet for about 5 minutes and then transfer to a rack to cool.


    [/et_pb_accordion_item][et_pb_accordion_item title=”jesse.in.mb’s Aunt Sheryl’s Dutch Apple Pie” _builder_version=”3.17.6″ open=”off”]

    jesse.in.mb's Aunt Sheryl's Dutch Apple Pie

    (It’s the best, fight me!)

    • 1 single 10" pie crust

    Filling

    • 2/3 cup sugar
    • 2 Tbsp all purpose flour
    • ¾ tsp cinnamon
    • ½ fresh lemon
    • 6-8 tart apples pared cored (pared,cored and sliced (equaling 6 cups))

    Crumb Topping

    • ½ cup flour
    • ¼ cup sugar
    • ¼ cup butter

    For Filling

    1. Combine first three ingredients.
    2. Put apples in crust, sprinkle dry mix over apples then squeeze ½ lemon over them (can be left for up to 24 hours in the fridge for more flavor).

    For Crumb Topping

    1. Combine flour and sugar, cut in butter until crumbly.
    2. Sprinkle on top of apples.
    3. Bake at 400 for 45-50 minutes


    [/et_pb_accordion_item][et_pb_accordion_item title=”Ina Garten’s Pear, Apple & Cranberry Crisp – contributed by SP” _builder_version=”3.17.6″ open=”off”]

    Ina Garten's Pear, Apple & Cranberry Crisp – contributed by SP

    This is pretty close to a crisp I make, except I use fresh cranberries. But this one has the added virtue of already being keyed in.

    For the filling

    • 2 pounds ripe Bosc pears (4 pears)
    • 2 pounds firm Macoun apples (6 apples)
    • 3/4 cup dried cranberries
    • 1 teaspoon grated orange zest
    • 1 teaspoon grated lemon zest
    • 2 tablespoons freshly squeezed orange juice
    • 2 tablespoons freshly squeezed lemon juice
    • 1/2 cup granulated sugar
    • 1/4 cup all-purpose flour
    • 1 teaspoon ground cinnamon
    • 1/2 teaspoon ground nutmeg

    For the topping

    • 1 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
    • 3/4 cup granulated sugar
    • 3/4 cup light brown sugar lightly packed
    • 1/2 teaspoon kosher salt
    • 1 cup old-fashioned oatmeal
    • 1/2 pound 2 sticks cold unsalted butter (diced)
    1. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F.

    For the filling:

    1. Peel and core the pears and apples and cut them into large chunks. Place the fruit in a large bowl and toss with the cranberries, zests, juices, granulated sugar, flour, cinnamon, and nutmeg. Pour into a 9 x 12 x 2-inch baking dish.

    For the topping:

    1. Combine the flour, sugars, salt, oatmeal, and cold butter in the bowl of an electric mixer fitted with a paddle attachment. Mix on low speed for 1 to 2 minutes, or until the mixture is in large crumbles. Sprinkle evenly over the fruit, covering the fruit completely.
    2. Place the baking dish on a parchment-lined sheet pan and bake for 50 minutes to 1 hour, until the top is brown and the fruit is bubbly. Serve warm.


    [/et_pb_accordion_item][et_pb_accordion_item title=”Pumpkin Imperial Stout Tiramisu by Nephilium” _builder_version=”3.17.6″ open=”off”]

    Pumpkin Imperial Stout Tiramisu by Nephilium

    So here’s a recipe (modified from an issue of BeerAdvocate).

    • 1 pint heavy whipping cream
    • ½ tsp cinnamon
    • ¼ tsp nutmeg
    • 1/8 tsp clove
    • ¼ cup Dry Malt Extract
    • 1 cup pumpkin puree
    • 2 cup mascarpone cheese
    • 24 oz Rasputin Imperial Stout or any other good Russian Imperial Stout
    • 3 packages ladyfinger cookies
    • 1 cup Simpsons Special Dark Roast Malt ground to a powder
    • cinnamon ground
    • powdered sugar
    1. In a medium bowl, add cream, cinnamon, nutmeg, clove and DME. Mix this until soft peaks form, then set aside. In a different bowl, mix together the pumpkin and the mascarpone until fully combined. Fold the pumpkin mixture into the spiced whipped cream until blended (some streaks are fine), and then set aside.
    2. Pour the stout into a shallow bowl or a pie plate. Select your serving container (I usually use a 13 x 9 pan, but you can use whatever size you wish). Then you begin the assembly of the tiramisu.
    3. Dip ladyfingers into the stout for 10 seconds, then flip them, and let them sit for 10 seconds again. Then place the ladyfingers into your serving container until you have a single layer.
    4. Then take a third of the pumpkin cream filling and distribute it over the ladyfingers. Dust with malt powder, then add another layer of soaked ladyfingers.
    5. Top the second layer with pumpkin cream and then garnish with malt powder, some cinnamon, and powdered sugar.
    6. Cover with plastic wrap and refrigerate for at least two hours before serving.

    DME and Simpsons Special Dark Roast can be acquired at your local homebrew store. Otherwise you can substitute ovaltine for the DME, and cocoa powder for the Special Dark Roast.

    If you use a smaller container, you can go to three layers of each, or even four. Do what you want, it’s your dessert.


    [/et_pb_accordion_item][et_pb_accordion_item title=”Hayeksplosives’s Easy, No Brainer, Creamy Pumpkin Pie” _builder_version=”3.17.6″ open=”off”]

    Hayeksplosives's Easy, No Brainer, Creamy Pumpkin Pie

    Easy, foolproof, and better than anything the store sells.

    • 1 14 oz can Sweetened Condensed Milk
    • 2 eggs
    • 1 tsp ground cinnamon
    • 1 tsp ground ginger
    • 1 tsp ground nutmeg
    • 1 15 oz can pumpkin
    • 1/2 tsp salt
    • 1 9-inch unbaked pie crust (I ALWAYS use graham cracker–it's great with the pumpkin spices.)
    1. Preheat oven to 425F.
    2. Whisk pumpkin, sweetened condensed milk, eggs, spices, and salt in bowl until smooth.
    3. Pour into pie crust.
    4. Bake 15 minutes.
    5. Reduce temp to 350F and bake 35-40 minutes until knife inserted in center comes out clean.
    6. Cool.
    7. Garnish with whipped cream or Cool Whip.


    [/et_pb_accordion_item][et_pb_accordion_item title=”SP’s Vegan Pumpkin Chia Pudding” _builder_version=”3.17.6″ open=”off”]

    SP’s Vegan Pumpkin Chia Pudding

    Even Web Dom can have a seasonal Thanksgiving dessert.

    • 1/4 c chia seeds
    • 1 c unsweetened vanilla almond milk
    • 1 tsp vanilla extract
    • 2 tsp sugar (or 10-15 drops liquid stevia, or to taste)
    • 1/4 c pumpkin puree
    • 1/2 tsp pumpkin pie spice (or equivalent components)
    • pinch salt
    • 2 tbsp pecans (toasted and chopped)
    1. Combine chia seeds with almond milk in a medium bowl. Set aside for one hour.

    2. Add vanilla extract, sweetener of choice, pumpkin puree, pumpkin pie spice, and salt to the bowl with chia seeds and almond milk. 

    3. Process with an immersion blender until smooth. Adjust sweetener to taste.

    4. Pour into a dessert dish and top with pecans.

    We prefer less-sweet foods, so you may want to adjust the sweetness to your preference.


    [/et_pb_accordion_item][et_pb_accordion_item title=”SP’s Candied Cashews” _builder_version=”3.17.6″ open=”off”]

    Candied Cashews

    • 2 cups whole cashews
    • 1 egg white
    • 1 tsp water
    • 2/3 cup granulated white sugar
    • 1/4 tsp salt
    • 1/2 tsp cinnamon
    1. Preheat oven to 325F. Line a baking sheet with a silicone baking mat or parchment paper.

    2. Beat egg white with the water in a medium bowl until foamy and light.

    3. Add the cashews, sugar, salt and cinnamon to the bowl. Stir thoroughly; nuts should be completely coated.

    4. Spread the mixture as evenly as possible on the baking sheet. Bake for about 30 minutes or until nuts are beginning to caramelize.

    5. Remove from the oven and allow nuts to cool.  Store in an air tight container.


    [/et_pb_accordion_item][/et_pb_accordion][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section]

  • Poll: Nicknames

    A while ago in one of the comment sections, we had a discussion about names and nicknames. It was revealed that I hate, despise, loathe the most common nickname for my given name. In fact, I’m not all that crazy about my given name, but at least it’s tolerable and not stupid. Did I mention I detest the usual diminutive?

    When I graduated from high school in my tiny hometown, I was determined to be called “nickname” no longer. So I laid down the law to my family and friends, and started correcting local shopkeepers who had known me my entire life by “nickname,” and was generally a pain in the ass about it to everyone. But it worked.

    My Mom settled on just shortening my name by lopping off the very end. My Dad shortened it even further, just calling me by the first syllable; he’d done that most of my life anyway.

    Whenever I met someone new, I’d introduce myself by my entire name, and if they immediately used “nickname” I would gently correct them. That worked well for most of my life.

    Then I allowed OMWC to convince me to relocate to the Midwest.

    People who are from here, and that seems to be almost everyone I meet–either nobody ever leaves or they all come back–invariably immediately assign “nickname” to me in their minds, and that is what they call me forevermore. No matter how I protest. *sigh*

    In my non-GlibWorld interactions with Glibs, it seems many prefer their whole given name, too, which brings me to this week’s poll questions:

    1. Do you have any preference between your given name or a nickname? Or do you just not care?

    2. Are there people in your life who get a pass on what they call you?

    3. Do you have a nickname not related to any part of your name? Did you make it up yourself, T-Bone? (I suspect many Glibs are called unflattering things, even–or especially–by strangers.)

    In case you’re curious, my current intimates–OMWC, the Founders, and other very close friends–often just call me the initial of my first name. When my children want to be assholes, they call me the abhorrent nickname.

    Yes, they are already disinherited.

  • An Eight Year Journey

    My old pal Joe, one helluva good friend

    I started smoking somewhere around the age of 14. My dad smoked, his three brothers smoked, it just seemed like the right thing to do. I started with Camel Lights and moved on to Winston, because it tastes good, like a cigarette should. Even early in high school, I was known as the heaviest, most constant, and most consistent smoker around. I was buying cartons by my senior year. By the time I reached college, I would go through 5-6 packs a weekend during my sessions of binge drinking. And all that was without sharing, I didn’t bum to people, I hate bums. Get a damn job and buy your own smokes you leach. And I never tried and had no plans to quit. I loved smoking, let me repeat, I loved smoking! Besides, it just takes the shitty years off the end of your life. 

    Somewhere around 2008-2009, smoking started to look a lot less glamorous to me. I was fine with idea of getting lung cancer. Lung cancer usually kills you quick. While I don’t prefer it, at least it won’t ruin your life for years. My fiance (at the time, now ex-wife) had a grandfather with COPD. That’s what really changed my mind. Watching the misery he went through was enough for me. I hearkened back to the asthma I outgrew during my childhood. I remembered what it was like to not be able to breathe. I decided I didn’t want that feeling ever again.

    Tastes Good like a cigarette shoud
    A pack of Winston S2’s I recently found in my old hiding spot at my parents house.

    I didn’t know anything about e-cigs at the time. So I tried to switch to dip. I had done it a few times in college; it really wasn’t my thing. But, I’d rather lose my gums and jaw than not be able to breathe. Grizzly Mint Long Cut was semi-successful. I was smoking less, but I certainly hadn’t quit. I was probably down to a pack or so a week for about 6 months. I went back to cigarettes, nearly exclusively, at the funeral of the man who was my inspiration to quit (the grandfather).

    Right around this time I had moved back in with my parents again while saving for my wedding. My brother, a lover of gadgets, had ordered my dad an electronic cigarette from some company online, I scoffed at the idea. But my father, who had never tried to quit in his life, decided to give it a go. He had one “analog” cigarette three days after starting the electronic and was disgusted with how it tasted. That was 2010, he hasn’t smoked a cigarette since.

    He told his bothers, all lifelong smokers, about it. 2 of the three switched with him. Now after a month or so of their success, I decided maybe it wasn’t the snake oil I thought it was and maybe I should give it a shot. These were the earliest days of vaping. The only shop in town that sold this stuff was actually a rare coin shop. The owner of the shop had started vaping and after his success he decided to start selling it out of the coin store. I bought my first ego 510 and I was off to the races.

    I was amazed at how well it worked. It didn’t taste exactly like smoking, but it was close enough. It mimicked the motion and movement. It produced the visual effect. Most importantly, it kept my nicotine receptors happy. Also, I can’t begin to tell you how much better I felt. I could breathe and I could breathe well. It only took a few weeks for my smoker’s cough to vanish. It was amazing. The other thing that I really like about it was that I could cheat. When I was drinking with friends, I’d have a smoke or two. The next day, I was fine with going right back to vaping.

    The technology changed incredibly rapidly during those first couple of years. In the early days you actually put a few drops on some poly-fill stuffing and held it up to the atomizer. It burned the poly-fill often and tasted awful when it did. Tanks came out next. Variable voltage after that. Then sub-ohm atomizers, variable wattage, stainless steel coils, etc. The products out there today are vastly superior to what I started out with.

    Shit i spent a lot of money batteries
    An array of the batteries I’ve used through the years. On the far right is the Joytech ego 650mA. As the got more advanced they got bigger. The one on the far left is the Innokin Cool Fire IV with variable voltage/wattage up to 100 watts.

    After the first couple of years of vaping, I actually stopped using tobacco flavored juice. That was a big step. And when that happened, I realized I wasn’t addicted to cigarettes any longer. I was actually more addicted to vaping than I was cigarettes. I still cheated occasionally (especially while drinking or hanging out with old smoker buddies), but it became less and less as time went on. About two years ago, I realized I really didn’t like smoking anymore, not even my occasional cheat. So I stopped real cigarettes altogether.

    Finally, about a year ago, I started questioning if I should try to quit vaping. Like cigarettes, I had never planned to quit. I actually thought I’d vape until I die. But, I started to worry about impending FDA regulations. I was concerned how much it was starting to cost (Indiana regulations drastically increased the price). And with more FDA regulations, the price is only destined to get higher.

    I started taking Wellbutrin (aka Bupropion or Zyban), a prescription quit smoking aid (and anti-depressant). I could tell when I first started taking it that I cared less about my nicotine addiction. About two weeks after starting it, on January 28th, 2018 I stopped vaping and all forms of nicotine. I haven’t had any since. Truthfully, after just a few days, almost all of cravings had subsided. After about 6 months I stopped taking the Wellbutrin. I very rarely crave nicotine at all anymore, and when I do it passes almost instantaneously. I really have no desire to ingest it in any form anymore.

    It was about an 8 year journey for me to quit nicotine. I think that using the dip actually helped me to start to break my habit. Then, the e-cig saved my life. They are a life saving device. If you smoke and you want to quit, give it a shot. My father, two of his brothers and countless friends of mine also quit smoking by switching to vaping. It really is a miracle of modern times. The only caveat is that you have to want to quit for vaping to work. But if you do, it might save your life.

    As a quick aside, I wrote many smoking related papers while in college. That’s how I found Jacob Sullum’s book For Your Own Good: the Anti-Smoking Crusade and the Tyranny of Public Health. His book led me to TOS, which in turn brought me here. BTW, I recommend the book, I wish there were an updated revision.

     

  • The Three Way Contour

    On the side… On the back… On the front…  No Glibs, it’s not that kind of three way we’re talking about.  This particular THREE WAY is a “Contour” watch made by Hamilton Watch Company of Lancaster Pennsylvania for only two years – 1938 and 1939.  It was a massive market failure and as a result is one the more highly desirable watches made by Hamilton because of its scarcity.  The watch sold so poorly that Hamilton bought back all remaining stock from its retailers, removed the movements to re-use them in more popular case styles and recycled the Contour cases.

    The New THREE-WAY “Contour”

    So called “driver’s watches” that could be worn on the side of the wrist became trendy in the late 1930s.  The Contour was Hamilton’s answer this trend.  Hamilton watches were arguably one of the best mass produced watches of the time.  Many would say they are better than anything almost anything of the period except for some limited production Swiss watches.  In terms of massed produced watches the American brands were generally superior to the mass produced Swiss watches of the same time.

    For whatever reason it’s also the watch that my maternal grandfather wore.  I’m not sure if he liked the style or simply got a deal on a watch that didn’t sell especially well.  Sadly, I never got the chance to ask him about this particular watch as I found it when cleaning out a closest in the basement after he died.  Fortunately, I was close to my grandfather and we did talk about many other things.

    Restored Hamilton Contour – Click for Full Size Image

    When I found the watch it was missing its band and buckle as well as its stem and crown.  It also had a cracked crystal.  Luckily as a Hamilton collector I had an original stem and crown in my parts collection.  For a band I used a period correct pigskin band with a period correct gold filled buckle.  I was able to order a replacement plastic crystal that you see in my photos from a parts house.  However, later a fellow collector sent me a new old stock original mineral glass crystal after he found out I was restoring a family piece.

    The movement in the watch is a Caliber 980 – a 14/0 size tonneau shaped movement that is about 19mm or 0.73 inches in length.  The 980 was commonly used in Hamilton’s gold filled cased watches.

    Hamilton 980 Movement

    This is the original and correct movement to my grandfather’s watch.  However, for Hamilton’s higher end and solid gold movements they also made a more highly finished version of this movement called the 982.  Functionally it’s identical to the 980, but has more jeweling and finishing.  It is one of my absolute favorite Hamilton movements.

    Hamilton 982 Movement

    In the old days watchmakers would inscribe the inside of the case every time the watch was brought in for service.  These cases are far from dust proof and the lubricants of the time also evaporated relatively quickly.  As a result watches of the period needed to be serviced every 2 to 4 years.  Here is the case back of the watch.

    Contour Case Back

    And here is a close up of the service marks:

    Service Marks – Click for Full Size Image

    It appears the watch was serviced from 1939 through 1955.  Each watchmaker had a different code and style for service marks so it is difficult to be 100% sure.  Today we don’t scar a watch like this. We use a Sharpie to note the date that we last serviced the watch and remove it with solvent when we clean the watch again.  With modern synthetic lubricants and gentle usage of the watch you can easily get a decade or more between services.

    The case is gold filled which means it is made of brass with thin sheets of gold applied to either side of the brass and bonded to it under high pressure.  The thicker the gold the longer it will last, but it almost always wears through on the high spots and the edges of the case.  After a decade or so of usage by my grandfather the corners on the top of the case have worn through.  There is no way to repair it.  Folks have tried to electroplate the cases, but it generally doesn’t work well.  It’s a problem with watches from this era as many case styles were only available in gold filled.  Here is how the case is constructed:

    Case Back
    Front of Case
    Underside of Case

    The dial of the watch is made with sterling silver and has solid gold applied numerals. I’ve never gotten a good answer as to what karat gold the numerals are.  The consensus is 18K.   The hands are gold plated.  The dial is one of the most fragile parts of the watch.  There are firms that specialize in restoring dials, but collectors prefer originality if at all possible.  Best I can tell this dial is original, but during routine service of the day it wasn’t uncommon for the dial to be sent out for repair as part of a general service.

    Contour Dial

    Values for Contours in good condition are anywhere between $500 and $1,000 US.  Needless to say for me, the watch is priceless and is basically the only watch in my collection that I wouldn’t sell.

  • CO-149: The Silver Thread – A Love Letter

    Preface

    Not too long ago, I asked in the comments what the commentariat’s favorite stretch of road is.  The answers ranged from US 7 in the Massachusetts Berkshires to Highway 95 to Zzyzx in the Mojave Desert and everything in between.  That post was a lead up to this article which I’ve been planning for some time.  Most of my submissions to the site have been self-important, bloviating, pseudo-philosophical dreck best left to stoned college sophomores.  For a change of pace, I thought I’d write a simple love letter to my favorite stretch of road, along with some purty pictures.

    The Silver Thread

    I speak, of course, of the article’s eponymous road, The Silver Thread, aka: CO-149, one of Colorado’s Scenic Byways.

    Cute, likes you and never says “no”.

     

    Beautiful when she lets down her hair.

    I have been traveling this road to the Undisclosed Location since I was six months old and it will never be replaced in my heart as my favorite drive.  While it’s most definitely beautiful, it’s more like the cute and comfortable girl-next-door.  Not the popular cheerleader like US 550 from Durango to Ouray,

    She’d rather be with the quarterback.

    or the unattainable bombshell like the Richardson Highway from Delta Junction to Valdez.

    Wouldn’t give you the time of day.

    It’s not seductively dark and mysterious like the Redwood Highway,

    Who knows what pleasures lie in those curves?

    nor exotic and sensuous like US 1 from Miami to Key West.

    ¡Muy caliente!

    Nevertheless, it is “my road” (not really, but I think of it that way), and I think it’s as beautiful as the day I met her.

     

    This 117 mile stretch of road runs from South Fork to US 50 just west of Gunnison.  In the process it goes over two passes: Spring Creek Pass, 10,898 feet where it crosses the Continental Divide,

    Pee in both the Gulf of Mexico and the Pacific simultaneously.

    and Slumgullion Pass, 11,530 feet.

    Before.

    Slumgullion is in an area that has been hit the hardest by the spruce beetle epidemic and the picture above shows it before the epidemic hit.  The following picture is after.

    After.

    This is what a good realtor would call “emerging views”.  The road also passes through the charming old mining towns of Creede and Lake City.

    Creede.

     

    Lake City.

    In my opinion, of the two, Lake City is the more scenic and has the bizarre story of Alferd Packer, the legendary cannibal and subject of Trey Parker and Matt Stone’s first foray into writing (“Cannibal: The Musical”).  It also sits at the base of five of Colorado’s Fouteeners; Uncompahgre Peak, Wetterhorn Peak, Handies Peak, Redcloud Peak and Mt. Sunshine.

    L-R: Wetterhorn, Matterhorn, Unnamed, Uncompahgre.

    Creede was the more productive mining town and has more Wild West heritage, counting Soapy Smith, Poker Alice, Bat Masterson and Robert Ford among its previous residents.  Lake City gets its name from Lake San Cristobal, a natural lake formed when about 10,000 years ago a massive landslide, called the Slumgullion slide, broke off the mountain and dammed up the Gunnison River.

    Lake San Cristobal.

     

    Slumgullion Slide.

    Lake City is also the gateway to the Alpine Loop, a great 4×4 trail that loops from Lake City to Ouray to Silverton and back to Lake City.

    Top of Cinnamon Pass in the Alpine Loop.

     

    Beginning of Engineer Pass in the Alpine Loop.

     

    Fall colors on the Alpine Loop.

    The Silver Thread represents my little slice of Heaven of hiking, shooting, fishing, offroading and drinking.  Driving on it always means that I can look forward to what it’s all about.

    Back to the Undisclosed Location.

     

    Also what it’s all about.
  • Motorcycles: A Rumination

    Besides being a pervert, and a libertarian, I’m also motorcyclist.  It is a hobby I’ve had for over 15 years and I still consider it part of my life.  There’s really nothing like the feeling of freedom when riding a motorcycle down a country mountain road.  This essay will be a little rambling, much the way I like to ride.  Hope y’all enjoy it.

    I bought my first motorcycle in 1999. My dad had been riding a few years, and I decided to ride bitch on the back to see what it was like. And I was fucking hooked.  At that time, I’d had my first real job. I had my own place, and money in the bank, the recipe for first motorcycle ownership.  Within a week of that ride, I had purchased a used Honda Shadow 600 and all the gear I needed.  I taught myself how to ride in a parking lot and off I went for the rest of the summer, taking rides with my dad and his friends.

    And my God did I enjoy it.  The only thing close to the sense of acceleration I’ve ever experienced was sky diving.  There’s a strange alchemy that happens; the gasoline is converted to freedom via the engine and a connection with the world around you that is simply joyful is transmuted from the speed and wind.  Not to horn in on Persig, but there is something Zen about riding.  Once you get the mechanics of it, you can reach a state of flow, where your body is taking in all the inputs and piloting the machine so smoothly, so perfectly, it feels like you are in that state of being one with everything.

    It is dangerous though. There is no denying it.  Donorcycle is a word for a reason and so is squid.  There isn’t much protection on a motorcycle, and mistakes can cost you dearly.  There’s ways to mitigate the risk; safety classes, good riding habits, proper gear, but there’s no denying the danger. I’m honest enough to admit that is part of the thrill. Part of the fun is that testing of your own skill and nerve.

    I went on to take safety classes, teach them, and I’ve owned about 10 motorcycles over the years. From Honda to BMW, from Triumph to Harley-Davidson. I’ve worked on them in my garage. Though I’m at best good for doing bolt-on accessories and extremely simple maintenance. I’ve helped my dad change stuff on his bikes, from replacing the pipes to swapping the carb. And vice versa. There’s still an element of pride in customizing your bike, making it yours, an expression of your individuality that is satisfying.  Add in spending time with your dad and it’s hard to think of a better way to spend time besides actually riding.

    Current Ride. No it doesn’t mark its territory

    A motorcycle allows for both solitude and camaraderie.  Riding a motorcycle down a country backroad, somewhere with curving roads and beautiful scenery is a rare respite from crowds.  You get to be alone with yourself in a positive way, let the motion carry off your cares and worries and focus simply on enjoying the ride with no voice but the engine’s growl and whip of the wind.  Or you can ride in a group, safely ensconced in a pack of people with the same interest, enjoying that feeling of doing something fun with people you like.  Making a day of it, stopping to eat and laugh and relax.  I gained, and later my friends my age gained, a great deal of wisdom from such rides with my dad and his pals.

    As you may have noticed, riding was often a way for my dad and I to connect.  Some of the rides we took will be those memories I hold onto for a long time.  I remember one year we went to a rally and as was our habit we didn’t haul the bikes in a trailer, we rode ‘em.  The last night of the rally he dumped the bike on his foot and broke it.  I had to rent a 20’ UHaul to get us and the bikes home as that was all that was available.  I had to ride both bikes up the little loading ramp to get them in and then drive us both home 400 miles in that monster.  My dad and I still reminisce about that trip and laugh.   We were chatting about it and other rides that were both perfect and not so perfect last week.  He’s selling his motorcycle this spring as he is no longer going to ride.  He wondered if I wanted the bike, but I have one, and for now that’s enough.

    I wonder though.  All the miles under my belt on motorcycles, the joy I get from riding, one day the risk will be too high for the reward and I’ll hang it up too.  I hope that day is a long way off.

  • Poll: Lost Friends & Family

    As most of you know, this past weekend OMWC and I had a lovely dinner with A Leap at the Wheel and Pope Jimbo. During which I asked if they had any suggestions for this week’s poll.

    Pope Jimbo’s response was, perhaps, predictable

    .

     

     

    However, Leap had a great suggestion, and so, I present this week’s poll with a big H/T to Leap!
     
     

    How many friends have you lost due to your politics?

    How many family members have stopped speaking to you due to your politics?

    Do you have any suggestions for future GlibPolls? If yes, email to: poll at thiswebsite dot com

    Discuss!

  • The Problem with Aggregation, Part 1 of an.. Aggregation

    I am not a number!  I am a free man!” So begins one of the filler songs on one of the top 5 metal albums of all time.  But I come here today not to extol the virtues Bruce Dickinson or to ruminate on the fact that galloping bass-lines are best bass lines.

    No, today I’m here for something much more interesting – Math!

    Let’s take a look at second grade arithmetic.  Here’s a refresher on the equivalence properties of equality:

    • The Reflexive Property tells us that an A is (equal to) an A.  Oh, now I’m sad again.
    • The Symmetric Property tells us that if A is equal to B, then B is equal to A.
    • The Transitive Property tells us that if A equals B, and B equals C, then A equals C.

    Pretty straight forward, and if you want to do arithmetic or algebra, these are the rules that let you do it.  But there are a lot of assumptions built into. For example, you can expand the Transitive Property of Equality to generate the Transitive Property of Inequalities, such that if A is less than B and B is less than C, A is less than C.

    And that is useful and intuitive too.  You can do some nice arithmetic and algebra with that too.  But like both my graduate-level math classes and my collected works of HP Lovecraft reminded us, there is more to this universe than nice reasonable Euclidean space.

    Take football.  If Directional State beat Poly A&M last week, and Poly A&M beats Costal U this week, stands to reason Costal U has no hope against Directional State next week, right?  After all, if DS > P A&M and P A&M > CU, so we know DS > CU. Just stands to reason, Transitive Property and wot not. All us learned gentlemen can see this.

    And a any sports fan knows… That’s not the way it works.  CU beats DS in, what, 35% of the games under this scenario?

    It’s almost like you can’t apply the Transitive Property to a model when in reality it doesn’t apply. You can’t just apply theoretical rules, you have to look at the real universe and see if they apply before you can incorporate them into your model.

    So let’s move to another domain and see if all the rules of basic arithmetic apply.  A man, a woman, and their kid are going backpacking. Weight is the limiting factor, they can walk until any one of them is worn out.  In a universe that is perfectly fair, but stupid, they all would carry the same load. In the real world, the kid would carry a day of food, a day of water, and emergency supplies.  The woman would carry a bit more, and the man would carry the most. They then hike farther than in the stupid and fair world. Thus, the transitive property holds true in this model.

    Here’s my first assertion for this series of articles: Assuming arithmetical property where they don’t actually exist in humanity is the root of most evil these days.

    One place that it shows up* is in macroeconomics.  Specifically, I’m thinking of the study of optimal tax policy.  This is the study of how to structure taxes to maximize utility.  Assuming arguendo that taxes will be a thing, how do you structure them so that the most good / least bad is done by them.  There’s a lot of math, behavior economics, etc that goes into these analysis.  And there are some beautiful curves telling you how to structure a tax policy.

    And they are always wrong.

    No galloping bass-lines here. Move along.

    They all boil down to how much can I rob Peter to pay Paul.  If a tax structure results in Peter having -3 happy points and Paul getting +5 happy points, that’s a net of +2 happy points.  So that’s a winner right? (I’m going to call “happy points” by their common made up name, utils.)

    No.  There is no +2 utils floating around as the product of aggregation.  There isn’t Peter+0 and Paul+2.  There is only Peter-3 and Paul+5. This leaves a pissed off Peter and a Paul who is going to get trained in the fine art of rent seeking.  Take it too far, and the Peters revolt. Take it too far the other way, and Paul becomes a parasite on society. Keep it right in the middle, and you can divide and conquer Peter and Paul for their votes.

    Why does aggregation work for the backpackers and not for the taxpayers?  Distance. Emotional distance, to be precise.

    The backpackers are a family, but that was just an excuse to use a kid in the example.  They could be a group of friends out for vacation, or a firm out to find gold in them thar hills.  Human nature says that those we care about are those closest to us. Its

    Adam Smith was probably into galloping bass-lines too, but we’ll never know.

    normal for you to care about yourself.  Adam Smith has a great example about a man in Europe facing the loss of his finger and hearing about an earthquake in China.  Which one does he care about more?  The finger, even though he would know that that’s nothing compared to hundreds of deaths.  It sounds cruel and heartless, but that’s just utopian thinking. In the real world, we all can identify with this idea. The closer you are to someone else, the more you care about them.

    You might even care enough to take on their burden to make their life easier.  In the real world, a parent would pay -3 utils to see their kid get +5 utils. The transitive property works because there is an emotional bond there.

    But there are 300 million people in America.  Any random American can only have a personal relationship with maybe a few dozen of them.  Any system that assumes the aggregation utils among all Americans is going to be a cock up.

    So ok, there’s one mathematical model with this flaw.  Hardly the root of all evil. Well, step out of the math and into the real world.  Race. Class. Religion. Political Party. These are all aggregation techniques. On rare occasions they are useful mental shortcuts.  In most cases, they just erase the individual in your mind and replace them with a cardboard cutout called up from your own mental Hollywood. All cops are violent. All Southerners are racists.  All progressives are stupid. All intellectuals are out of touch and dangerous.

    These are common errors in thinking.  And they are the root of all major humanitarian disasters of the last century.  Except it was all blacks being violent, let’s roll out the drug war. All reactionaries are racists, let’s roll them off to the gulag.  All low-income female workers are stupid, let’s sterilize them. All intellectuals are a danger, let’s hunt them down.  The pattern repeats itself, and as we’ve seen, this pattern is dangerous.  Any pattern that could lead to genocide, mass sterilization, or the drug war should be cut off before it can get anywhere near this scale of disaster.

    So I hope here to have laid out a case that aggregation doesn’t apply on the large scale.  But for individuals, they can have it apply to themselves and their small circle.  This error is complex, but it reaches into some of the worst events in living memory. In the next article, I’ll discuss how a person could harness this insight to make themselves a better person.  And in a twist that I’m sure would make all of you Jordan Peterson fans with clean rooms interested, this technique doesn’t require any change from anyone but yourself.