STEVE SMITH WORK WITH TOURISM BOARD! HIM READY FOR CLOSE UP, MR. DEMILLE!
STEVE SMITH SEE FUNNY GLIBERTARIAN PEOPLE ON VACATION, BUSY AT WORK AND HAVE TROUBLE GIVE LINKS. STEVE SMITH WANT TO HELP! SO HIM FINISH UP WITH HIKER GROUP. BY FINISH UP, MEAN…WELL, YOU KNOW. AND THEN DO COMMERCIAL FOR TOURISM BOARD. “COME SEE WOODS. BE CHANGED FOREVER.” IS TRUTH TOO. STEVE SMITH MAKE SURE VISITOR HAVE TRANSFORMATIONAL EXPERIENCE.
TRANSFORMATIONAL EXPERIENCE, COMING UP!
NOTHING STEVE SMITH CAN DO BUT SHAKE HEAD AT CHICAGOMEDICAL EXAMINER. NOT WORK, MISS EASY CASES. STEVE SMITH WORK VERY HARD, TAKE PRIDE IN WORK, SO HIM NO UNDERSTAND BAD DOCTORS.
HERE CAUSE OF DEATH, STUPID MAN!
MORE SPORTS GAMBLE. STEVE SMITH NO GAMBLE, HIM SAVE ALL MOSS AND LEAVES AND BARK, SO CAN RETIRE EARLY! HAVE 401(P) PLAN. P IS FOR PLANT. MIGHT OPEN 403(R) PLAN TOO. R IS FOR… WELL, YOU KNOW.
STEVE SMITH LAUGH. HIM LIKE TABLOIDS! “FECES FIEND” VERY FUNNY! WHAT ALSO FUNNY IS STEVE SMITH THINK….WHICH FUNNY GLIBERTARIAN PERSON WAS THIS, GET CAUGHT AS POO JOGGER? HA HA HA! STEVE SMITH LAUGH MORE.
KILL NO FUNNY – BUT THIS VERY TABLOID STORY. THIS MAKE STEVE SMITH WONDER …. WHERE FUNNY GLIBERTARIAN NUMBER 6? HIM FUNNY BRITISH GLIBERTARIAN, AND STEVE SMITH MISS.
CRAZY ROCKET MAN AND HAT AND HAIR GET READY TALK. STEVE SMITH GET READY LAUGH. LOOK AT PICTURE… STEVE SMITH THINK SINGAPORE PEOPLE FUNNY!
Deb Haaland won the Democratic nomination for a New Mexico congressional seat on Tuesday, clearing her path to becoming the nation’s first Native American congresswoman.
…
Haaland, a single mom based in Albuquerque, is an enrolled member of the Laguna Pueblo tribe. She chaired New Mexico’s Democratic Party from 2015 to 2017 and was the Native American vote director for Barack Obama’s presidential campaign in 2012. That’s in addition to her nearly two decades of volunteering on Democratic campaigns and her failed bid for lieutenant governor in 2014.
There are currently two Native American representatives in the House — both are men from Oklahoma.
To get a sense of how significant Haaland’s presence in Congress would be, consider that more than 10,000 people have served in the House and nearly 1,300 have served in the Senate since the first Congress met in 1789. Not a single one was a Native American woman.
“Crazy, right?” Haaland said in a February interview with HuffPost. “It’s 2018.”
Poor Lizzie Warren. She just can’t catch a break. I guess she’ll have to go back to picking at her kale and quinoa salad while binging Scandal and crying. (Sanders/Warren 2020!)
Among the hackneyed jokes about fishing and steaks in the Father’s Day cards at your local drugstore this year, you may happen upon a bit of visual humor that’s disturbingly open to interpretation. On the front of one card from American Greetings, an alarmed-looking boy holds up a pair of men’s briefs so large, they stretch from nose to knees and across his entire wingspan. The punchline within: “I think I’ll just stick with trying to fill your shoes.”
But the boy isn’t holding a pair of shoes. He’s holding underwear. His message concerns the impossibility, or undesirability, of trying to fill his dad’s underwear. Inquiring minds might wonder—just what would it mean to do that, to fill dad’s underwear?
The card lends itself to two schools of thought. The more benign reading, under the loosest possible definition of benign, holds that it’s a fat joke. Dad has a big butt and a big belly, so he needs an enormous pair of underwear to cover it all. A few steps closer to the gutter is the second interpretation: that it’s a commentary on Dad’s giant penis.
Watching Mandy Marcotte’s replacement on Slate grope her way through a story has always been grimly funny–about on par with watching the fat kid at summer camp no one likes slowly drowning in a secluded part of the lake–but Christina Cauterucci’s attempts at a lightweight humor article about a non-subject is more like being forced to help fish that fat kid’s body out before Parent’s Weekend. She seems incapable on some fundamental biochemical level of either understanding or producing humor. She approaches everything with her keen sense for sniffing out things to be outraged about dialed to 11. I’d call her a one-trick pony, but that would be unfair to ponies, tricks, ones, and hyphens.
KELOWNA, B.C.—An afternoon drive turned into a “devastating” experience for a woman and her son when she says human feces fell from the sky and into her eyes through the open sunroof of their car in Kelowna, B.C.
Susan Allan, 53, said she and her 21-year-old son Travis Sweet had just returned from having lunch with her mother in nearby Peachland when a smelly substance fell on their faces and covered the vehicle.
The feces appeared to have fallen from a plane that she saw when they were stopped at a red light with another car that was also hit, Allan said, adding she and the other driver went to a car wash and sprayed themselves off before she called the Kelowna airport.
She said an administrator told her Transport Canada would be investigating and the department has confirmed it is looking into the possibility of frozen lavatory waste, called “blue ice,” falling from an aircraft.
“I just want everybody to know that although this seems like a surreal type of story, this happened to me and my son,” Allan said in a Facebook message to The Canadian Press.
“All we want people to know is that it was quite devastating to be covered in poop and I hope it never happens to anybody else.”
What is more punk than throwing battery acid in the face of your little sister after she’s been raped?
The Pakistani Taliban has debuted a new uniform that combines decades of punk rock, splashes of Gwen Stefani — and a dash of dominatrix.
Flawlessly blending a combination of camo pants, black shirts, fingerless leather gloves and a total disregard for parental authority, the Tehrik-e Taliban Pakistan (TTP) strutted their stuff in a new training video featuring rocket-propelled grenades, white board instruction and standing around in mid-”La Macarena” poses.
There’s no official word yet on the meaning behind “No Tension,” but if it’s a band name as we assume, it sounds rad.
By tucking camo pants into knee-high white socks, TTP fighters now have greater aerodynamic maneuverability when firing RPGs, as well as the added flexibility required to break into an impromptu mosh-kick whenever No Doubt’s “Just a Girl” blares from the speakers of a gun-mounted Toyota pickup.
Add in the fingerless leather gloves and high-top sneakers, and you’re guaranteed a seamless transition whenever going from firing a Kalashnikov to hopping on a skateboard and dropping into an empty pool.
Honestly, I see this as a huge step backward fashion-wise. The old uniforms built on a few simple pieces–the light sweater, the canvas pants, the balaclava; all in classic black–that any aspiring jihadist might very well already have in their closet. And while a graphic tee might do well for team spirit, how will they stand up the rigors of rural life or training? How available are replacements? It goes against the whole logic of the prêt-à-porter aesthetic the Taliban and other international terrorist groups have cultivated from the very beginning. (Who could forget the clean lines of the turtlenecks worn for the massacre at the Munich Olympics or the simple elegance of Arafat’s checkered keffiyeh?)
74 years ago, 160,000 men got off various ships or planes and went ashore in the Normandy region of France. Enemies were waiting for them, and that meant more than 9,000 of them would be dead by the end of the day. To this day, combat experience aside, I cannot imagine what that would have been like. So as I grumbled about getting up this morning, it struck me… what would it have been like to get up that morning, and know what was coming. So I got into my comfortable auto, drove to my climate controlled office building and had a cup of good coffee and shut my gob.
In honor of that massive effort and undertaking…you get Links early.
Your church have anything special about it? This one does. Bonus points for having the patron saint of paratroopers.
This might make OMWC shudder a little (Australian Shiraz!!!!) but we ain’t the only ones in TRADE WARZ with China. Another example of the need for actual free trade – not having commerce turn into a lever for the CCP to bend another country to their will. Of course, this also is a good risk management teaching point for anyone who depends too much on a single market for their growth. Ride the Dragon to profits, and it may turn around and bite you.
Sorry Cleveland, it appears your annual Biblical Plague hath returned. Maybe they could set a river on fire to repel them?
Only the classiest, most wantedcan work on the White House! Yuge charges. The best.
We will end with someone ending their military career in … an entertaining fashion. Not the way I chose to leave, but you have to give him credit for originality.
A male pilot whale struggled for five days to stay alive in Thailand near the Malaysian border after rescuers found it with 17 pounds of plastic bags in its stomach, the Washington Post reported on Sunday, but it ultimately succumbed to its illnesses.
The whale died on Friday, the Post wrote, and an autopsy discovered what Thailand’s Department of Marine and Coastal Resources said were 80 plastic bags lodged in its stomach.
I keep seeing this story all over the place and every time, I think: Stupid fucking whale. 80 plastic bags, whale? Did they taste good or something, whale? 80?!? You couldn’t have stopped after, say, 50 plastic bags, you stupid fucking whale?
It’s far from the first time whales have turned up sick or dead from ingesting trash. Per the Post, experts say that the whale likely believed the bags were food:
Thai officials said they believe the whale mistook the floating plastic for food. Pilot whales primarily eat squid but are also known to hunt octopus, cuttlefish and small fish when squid prove elusive, the American Cetacean Society said.
That excuses eating the occasional bag, like “Oh, no! I accidentally ate one of those mysterious dark green potato chips that are sometimes in the bag!” but 80? 80 fucking bags, whale? You sure are one dumb fuck of a whale.
“What’s worse than Insane Clown Posse?” is supposed to be a rhetorical question, not a life goal.
Least surprising story or leastest surprising story?
After a Melbourne woman named Eliza Stafford wrote on Facebook that Houston rapper Riff Raff drugged and raped her at a 2013 show, his Australian tour was swiftly canceled. Riff Raff has yet to respond to Stafford’s allegation, and now a second woman alleges that the rapper tried to coerce her into sex when she was a minor.
In a phone call with Jezebel, 20-year-old Kelsey Doucette, who shared her story on Facebook on Friday, says that she met Riff Raff when she was 17 years old at the Milwaukee, Wisconsin stop of Warped Tour in July 2015. Doucette attended the tour with four friends, two of whom confirmed the details of her story with Jezebel. Contacts for Riff Raff’s management and booking did not respond to requests for comment for this story. A press contact for Warped Tour also did not respond to a request for comment.
Look, ma’am. I’m not going to say you are as stupid as a plastic-bag eating whale, but you were at a Riff Raff “concert.” You have already made a questionable life choice on par with having your eyeballs tattooed. And then you go off alone with the guy who looks like the picture of a rapist in a children’s book about rapists? There’s no good time to be had here. None. There is only molestation.
tl;dr Buy the women in your life all the bear mace you can find.
BONUS JEZEBEL CONTENT:
Curious Squid
6/04/18 9:25pm
It sounds like all her friends were teenagers too so I know I should give some leeway here, but I can’t help wondering what her male friends’ thoughts were when they were told “Oh….he doesn’t want any guys coming in the van, only the girls”. Like, this feels like it could be a teachable moment about how being a good dude isn’t just not being a bad dude, it’s looking out for your girl friends and standing up to potentially sketchy behaviour from other dudes.
Really? I thought the lesson here was “don’t get in the van with a guy who looks like a rapist.”
A deadly viral disease spread by bats is once again infecting humans, but in this case, it isn’t Ebola. As of June 1, an outbreak of the Nipah virus has infected at least 18 people and killed 17 in Kerala, India, the World Health Organization (WHO) reported. The outbreak, which is the first to hit South India, raises fears of the disease becoming more far-reaching.
Nipah was discovered in 1998, when it sickened nearly 300 people and killed 100 in Malaysia (its name was taken from one of the villages where it first struck). Many of the victims had been farmers who contracted the virus through close contact with their pigs, which led to the euthanization of millions of pigs. But it turns out the pigs actually got the virus from another animal: It’s now known that fruit bats belonging to the genus Pteropus (otherwise called flying foxes) are the native carriers of Nipah.
Not everyone exposed to Nipah gets sick, but those who do develop flu-like symptoms of fever, cough, and headache within three to 14 days after being exposed. Often, the illness gets worse quickly, with sufferers developing pneumonia, acute respiratory distress, or neurological symptoms like seizures and coma within a day or two. There’s no cure or specific treatment for Nipah, and its mortality rate can range from 40 to 100 percent.
I can only assume that the bats were having sex with the pigs. Really, nothing else makes sense.
MÉXICO – Este domingo por la noche se reportó la ejecución del peleador mexicano de 25 años, Gilberto Parra Medina, en la colonia Ejidal de Pueblo Yaqui, en Ciudad Obregón, Sonora, en compañía de Orlando Verduzco, de acuerdo con reportes locales.
Parra Medina, mejor conocido como ‘Parrita’, disputó en marzo de 2015 el campeonato de peso minimosca de la Organización Mundial de Boxeo, y apenas en marzo pasado perdió ante el capitalino Saúl Juárez la pelea por el campeonato latino de peso minimosca del Consejo Mundial de Boxeo.
Según reportes locales, el boxeador estaba a bordo de un auto gris de marca Matiz, que iba conduciendo el propio peleador, cuando fueron atacados por otro vehículo, del que no se dio más información.
Agentes periciales no informaron de inmediato sobre los impactos de bala que recibió el joven boxeador. De acuerdo con un testigo, los dos tripulantes del vehículo fallecieron al instante, lo cual provocó consternación en el medio boxístico local, estatal y nacional.
Parra Medina sostuvo 31 peleas profesionales, de las cuales ganó 26, perdió apenas cuatro y tuvo un No Contest.
MEXICO CITY – This Sunday night, the execution of the 25-year-old Mexican fighter, Gilberto Parra Medina, was reported in the Ejidal neighborhood of Pueblo Yaqui in Ciudad Obregón, Sonora, in the company of Orlando Verduzco, according to local reports.
Parra Medina, better known as ‘Parrita’, played in March 2015 the World Boxing Organization light flyweight championship, and just last March lost to the capital Saul Juarez the fight for the Latin World Lightweight Championship of the World Council of Boxing.
According to local reports, the boxer was aboard a gray Matiz car, which was being driven by the fighter himself, when they were attacked by another vehicle, of which no further information was given.
Expert agents did not immediately report on the bullet impacts the young boxer received. According to one witness, the two crewmembers of the vehicle died instantly, which caused consternation in the local, state and national boxing media.
Parra Medina held 31 professional fights, of which she won 26, lost just four and had a No Contest.
Venezuela threw me for a loop and released prisoners. I bet it because the prison ran out of food.
El gobierno de Venezuela liberó a 80 opositores detenidos, algo que calificó como un acto de paz después que el presidente Nicolás Maduro diera la orden el viernes. En el listado de los opositores presos que salieron en libertad este fin de semana están Gilbert Caro, Renzo Prieto, Wilmer Azuaje y Raúl Emilio Baduel. El fiscal general Tarek William Saab además comunicó que se pueden esperar más excarcelaciones en el transcurso de la semana.
The Venezuelan government released 80 opponents arrested, which he described as an act of peace after President Nicolás Maduro gave the order on Friday. In the list of the imprisoned opponents that were released this weekend are Gilbert Caro, Renzo Prieto, Wilmer Azuaje and Raúl Emilio Baduel. Attorney General Tarek William Saab also announced that more releases can be expected over the course of the week.
La ironía de esta declaración es que Trump se refiere a una práctica espeluznante que está ocurriendo en su gobierno y que refleja la profunda crisis moral del país. Según un reporte del diario The New York Times, desde octubre pasado el Servicio de Control de Inmigración y Aduanas de Estados Unidos (ICE, por sus siglas en inglés) ha separado a 700 niños de sus padres o de otros adultos tutores mientras intentaban cruzar la frontera suroeste hacia EE.UU.
Dentro de estos niños se encontraba un bebé de 18 meses, cuya madre se presentó ante las autoridades de inmigración para pedir asilo con el certificado de nacimiento del pequeño en su poder.
A principios de este mes, el secretario general de la Casa Blanca, John Kelly, protagonizó varios titulares por ni siquiera haber intentado ocultar su desprecio frente a estos niños, al decir que aquellos arrestados por los agentes “serán atendidos, llevados a un cuidado temporal o lo que sea”.
Y, semanas previas, el Departamento de Salud y Servicios Humanos admitió que la agencia había perdido el rastro de aproximadamente 1.500 niños inmigrantes que puso en el sistema de hogares temporal de Estados Unidos, durante los gobiernos de Trump y del expresidente Barack Obama. Recientemente, una red de traficantes que se hizo pasar por patrocinadores para estos hogares fue expuesta por forzar a los niños inmigrantes a vivir y trabajar bajo condiciones espantosas en granjas de pollos en Ohio.
The irony of this statement is that Trump refers to a creepy practice that is occurring in his government and that reflects the deep moral crisis of the country. According to a report in The New York Times, since last October the US Immigration and Customs Enforcement Service (ICE) has separated 700 children from their parents or other adult guardians while trying to cross the border. Southwest border towards USA
Among these children was an 18-month-old baby, whose mother appeared before the immigration authorities to request asylum with the child’s birth certificate in her possession.
Earlier this month, White House Secretary General John Kelly made headlines for not even trying to hide his contempt of these children by saying that those arrested by the agents “will be taken care of, taken into temporary care. or whatever”.
And, weeks before, the Department of Health and Human Services admitted that the agency had lost track of the approximately 1,500 immigrant children it placed in the United States’ temporary housing system during the Trump and former President Barack Obama governments. Recently, a network of traffickers posing as sponsors for these homes was exposed for forcing immigrant children to live and work under appalling conditions in chicken farms in Ohio.
informan que el animal iba en una transportadora de mascotas desde Phoenix y se dirigía a Newark, Nueva Jersey. Fue encontrado muerto en su caja el miércoles por la mañana en una instalación de carga en el aeropuerto.
Relacionado:
“Al final del vuelo, el perro estaba muerto y la mujer lloraba sentada en el pasillo”
Delta Air Lines informó que un asistente de vuelo revisó al perro alrededor de las 6 a.m y luego dos horas más tarde, cuando ya lo halló muerto.
La aerolínea informó en un comunicado a la televisora WXYZ-TV que está “llevando a cabo una revisión exhaustiva de la situación”.
A principios de este año, un cachorro de bulldog francés murió después de que una azafata de United Airlines le dijo a su dueño que colocara la jaula del perro en un compartimento superior.
they report that the animal was on a pet carrier from Phoenix and was heading to Newark, New Jersey. He was found dead in his box on Wednesday morning at a loading facility at the airport.
Related:
“At the end of the flight, the dog was dead and the woman was crying sitting in the hallway”
Delta Air Lines reported that a flight attendant checked the dog around 6 a.m. and then two hours later, when he was found dead.
The airline said in a statement to WXYZ-TV that it is “carrying out a thorough review of the situation.”
Earlier this year, a French bulldog puppy died after a United Airlines stewardess told her owner to place the dog’s cage in an overhead compartment.
Happy birthday to New England Patriots owner Robert Kraft, Ron Livingston, “Marky” Mark Whalberg and Kenny G!
Maybe not Kenny G.
Translation services provided by the Alpha Beta corporation. Who think you are dangerous.
OAKLAND, CALIFORNIA—“STIGMA KILLS,” “MY BODY, NOT YOUR CHOICE,” “SEX WORK ≠ TRAFFICKING”—those were just a few of the signs pumped in the air as over 300 sex workers and allies gathered Saturday in downtown Oakland for International Whores Day, a global celebration of sex workers’ rights. This long-standing annual event was injected with renewed intensity this year thanks to outrage over FOSTA, the country’s new “anti-trafficking” law. Several marchers with years of activist experience said the turnout was unprecedented for a sex worker rally.
“This is more sex workers than I’ve ever seen in one place ever,” said Pele, a 42-year-old dominatrix who has been a sex worker for more than 20 years. “We’re out in the street and loud and proud—I’ve never seen this.”
The Fight for 15 is about a maximum number of orifices filled at once. Surgical techniques advance every year. Imagine a sex worker crossed with a Dyson crossed with a Swiss Army knife. Imagine a bluetooth-capable Flesh-scooter that bleeds and screams and poops strawberry ice cream. Imagine a hooker with a supercharger and 4k eyes. I cannot wait. The future will be more erotic and terrifying than any of us can imagine.
While some Democratic leaders, including Sen. Kirsten Gillibrand of New York, have suggested that Clinton should have resigned at the time, the former president defended his decision to instead fight impeachment charges. He said he wouldn’t have changed his approach, in light of #MeToo.
“Well, I don’t think it would be an issue. Because people would be using the facts instead of the imagined facts. If the facts were the same today, I wouldn’t,” he said.
…
Clinton said his critics are now pouncing on that affair because of their frustration with President Trump, who has been accused by numerous women of inappropriate sexual behavior, all of which Trump has denied.
“A lot of the facts have been conveniently omitted to make the story work, I think partly because they were frustrated that they got all these serious allegations against the current occupant of the Oval Office. And his voters don’t seem to care,” Clinton said. “I think I did the right thing. I defended the Constitution.”
The only good thing about Billy-Jeff being in the news so much is watching his scrofulous march to the grave. And wondering if Hillary took the cure for every dose of syphilis he gave Her–I mean, the physical and mental decline from tertiary syphilis would explain the last couple of years, right?
When I was a sophomore in high school, I went to see Darren Aronofsky’s Black Swan with my best friend. It was the first time I ever saw a lesbian sex scene, and it’s fair to say it had a profound effect on me. I came out as gay a year later.
Black Swan was one of the first films I’d ever seen where female pleasure was depicted whatsoever—and the first movie I saw that took lesbianism seriously. At least I thought it did. Eight years later, I’ve realized that the romance that helped me understand my own lesbianism is not just deeply unromantic, it’s also founded on homophobic tropes. Watch more in the video.
Now, I understand that you won’t watch the video, so I’ll tell you the highlight: When the narrator talks about coming out as a lesbian she flashes a before and after photo of herself.
Apparently, coming out as a lesbian isn’t about admitting a same-sex attraction to women, but rather getting the cast of Les Eye For The Straight Girl to turn you into a stylish Mexican twink.
This video is from Slate’s unintentional hilarious series Pre-Woke Watching, a running struggle session with the guilt of enjoying TV and movies before you were taught that they were double-plus ungood wrongthink.
Apparently, even Slate is sort of embarrassed about it since they don’t seem to have a handy link the series as a whole. Look to the bottom of the article above to find past episodes.
It’s claimed Roquefort cheese created in a cave near Roquefort, France, today in 1070. Not sure if this is true, but it sounds good, and yay cheese.
June 4th seems to be a good day for ballooning. In 1783 Joseph and Jacques Montgolfier make 1st public hot-air balloon flight (unmanned), with an estimated altitude of 1,600-2,000m. One year later in 1784 Madame Elizabeth Thible becomes the first female balloonist.
ZARDOZ SPEAKS TO YOU, HIS CHOSEN ONES. ZARDOZ FINALLY HAS A DAY OFF FROM GRAIN HAULING…AND HE CAN THINK OF NOTHING BETTER THAN SHARING LINKS WITH THE CHOSEN ONES. FOR ZARDOZ HAS LIFTED YOU FROM BRUTALITY, AND WOULD KEEP YOU SNARKING AT THE BRUTALS WHO PLAGUE THE EARTH AS IN DAYS OF OLD.
ZED COULD BEAT JAMES BOND
FIRST, HOWEVER, ZARDOZ MUST ANSWER THIS BIT OF BRUTAL FOOLISHNESS. SOMEONE HAS OVERTHOUGHT THINGS A BIT. WHAT IS WRONG WITH SIMPLY ENJOYING A CINEMATIC MASTERPIECE? FOOLISH BRUTAL.
BUT YOU ARE NOT HERE FOR THAT…YOU ARE HERE FOR LINKS. THEREFOR, RECEIVE THE GIFT OF THE LINK! GO FORTH AND COMMENT!
ZARDOZ HOPES THE IDIOCY OF THE BRUTAL WITH MOOBS IS LISTENED TO…ANYTHING TO HASTEN THE COLLAPSE OF BRUTAL SOCIETY! BESIDES, ZARDOZ DOESN’T NEED GASOLINE OR DIESEL FUEL!
One of the reasons I prefer doing morning links is that I’ve just taken my daily blood pressure pills so the effect is still fresh. Otherwise I’d pop a few blood vessels with sheer rage. But let me ease into the rage inducements slowly, and start with Today’s Birthdays. (“I mean in history, Patty. Before they changed the water.”). They include unperson and southern sleazebag Jefferson Davis, chief Bowery Boy Leo Gorcey, Bernie Schwartz (“Yonda lies da castle of my faddah, who is da king!”), Raul Castro (may he burn in hell), Steve Dalkowski (the most interesting pitcher of all time), and Suzi Quatro, who is one of the few challengers to Diana Rigg in the “who looks best in tight leather pants” contest.
OK, now it’s rage time, but I’ll try to temper it with some amusement. Let’s get the nutpunch out of the way first. Surprise, surprise, if we let government thugs steal with impunity, they… steal with impunity. In a world that was even 1% just, every elected official who supports asset forfeiture would be impeached and imprisoned, and every lower level grunt who used that process would be fed feet-first into a woodchipper. Hanging from a lampost would do, but the woodchipper would be more entertaining. Rule of thumb: any policy enthusiastically embraced by Trump, Obama, Bush, and Clinton is 99.999% sure to be totally evil.
It is hard being a Muslim. Even harder if you’re a female. And harder yet during Ramadan. This story had so much snark opportunity, I didn’t know where to start, but hey, maybe with the photo of the Muslim “beauty blogger” with the canonical Groucho eyebrows, selfie head-tilt, and obligatory duck lips. The Jews had a better idea- make ’em stay outside the city walls until the bleeding stops.
Old Guy Music. I confess to being an unabashed fan of Okkervil River, and I present here one of their lesser-known songs with maybe the oddest theme of any song I know of.
STEVE SMITH THINK SINGAPORE PEOPLE FUNNY!
