Author: Old Man With Candy

  • The Greatest Political Movie Ever- And My Favorite Politician

    The Greatest Political Movie Ever- And My Favorite Politician

    In my professional life as a scientist, we spend a lot of research effort on phenomena known as “phase transitions.” The most interesting of them are ones which are sudden and irreversible- for example, if you’ve ever had the experience of superheated water from a microwave oven, where it looks placid, but a small disturbance causes it to violently boil, almost exploding, you know what I’m talking about.

    There have been lots of excellent movies about politics- Wag The Dog, In The LoopPrimary Colors, The Candidate… but the one I think is the greatest of all time deals with a phase transition in a social sense. The Last Hurrah was made in the late 1950s as television was really taking hold in American culture. And it was extremely prescient in that it perfectly captured the moment of political phase transition. Old school politics was relentlessly retail- as with the principal character in this film, a city mayor would have a true and deep love for his city, know anybody who was anybody (and that did not exclusively mean “the rich and powerful”), spend all his time taking the pulse of every community, and almost exclusively focus on what we now call “constituent services.” Campaigning was in person: appearances at funerals, weddings, bar mitzvahs, pancake breakfasts, lodge meetings, everywhere the mayor could be seen. And everyone knew exactly who he was and had stories to tell about how he helped them personally.

    In this movie, Spencer Tracy played Frank Skeffington (a thinly disguised version of Boston mayor James Curley), a true old-school politician, who clashed with the social elite (rather than counting on them for funding) and was familiar to the ordinary folks. The film follows him (through the eyes of his nephew) during his last campaign, which he runs exactly like all of his other previously successful campaigns. But there’s a new element, a phase transition about to happen. The city elite find a telegenic young man, inexperienced and without any real ideas or principles, a tabula rasa made for TV. He runs a campaign that’s an early version of a modern political campaign, TV-oriented, all about image and appearance, and well-funded by the old-line old-money elite who hated Skeffington. The only thing missing is Frank Lutz doing a focus group.

    And of course, Skeffington loses. The phase transition is irreversible. We have suddenly transitioned to modern politics.

    So beyond this being an excuse for me to urge all of you to see this movie, and maybe tell me I’m full of shit for calling it the greatest movie about politics ever made, I wanted to reminisce a bit about my favorite politician, someone very much of that era. Mimi Dipietro was a city councilman for 25 years in Baltimore, a product of lower-middle-class ethnic white East Baltimore, and while not exactly the articulate and smooth Frank Skeffington, he embodied the virtue of truly being one of the people.

    “I know how to do my job. I do it honestly, sincerely and I help everybody who needs help. Yes, I got a big mouth, and if you got it coming to you, I’ll give it to you. But I’ll help you. That’s one thing. I’ll represent you, and I’ll try to help you. “

    And that he did. Have a problem? Mimi will fix it. Potholes, weeds, zoning issues, permits, Mimi was on your side and ready to use his power and influence to get it fixed. Despite his conversational abilities in English, Italian, German, and Polish, his battles with the English language were legendary, and the English language usually lost.

     

    “I would never tell a lie. If I have to lie to you, I’ll deviate from you.”

    “I have been to half a dozen political affairs lately, and each time I get a standing evasion.”

    “The criminal justice system suffers from too much flea bargaining.”

    Asked about why Baltimore was a great city (right after the Mount St. Helens eruption): “’Cause we ain’t got no volcanoes.”

    My favorite Mimi story has, to my knowledge, never been printed. I know about it because a friend of mine was a witness. My friend was visiting Mimi’s office during the winter, when two of his constituents came in with a problem. “Our apartment ain’t got the heat workin’ and the landlord ain’t fixin’ it.” Mimi immediately got the city inspector’s office and the city custodian on the phone. “I got a coupla niggers in here that ain’t got heat! Ya gotta fix this for ’em!”

    My friend, stunned, said, “Mimi, you can’t use language like that!”

    The two constituents replied, “That’s OK, that’s just how he talks, we don’t care, we just want the heat.”

    And two hours later, a city crew was at their building and they got the heat.

  • Monday Afternoon (((Links)))

    Monday Afternoon (((Links)))

     

    Brett decided to celebrate his 60 Days Sober award by having a drink. Then celebrated that drink by having a drink. And those two drinks seemed so lonely that he needed another… anyway, as his sponsor, I guess you’re stuck with me for your afternoon entertainment.

     

    Aren’t you glad Hillary didn’t get elected? If she had, we’d be going to war in Syria. Which we now totally won’t do. Nossir.

     

    Feel like a nutpunch? Of course you do. And here ya go!

     

    Oscar ratings bust. Fox News attributes it to politicization. Maybe. Or maybe because ratings for everything are down as people unplug.

     

    The screaming for more Action Against Drugs continues. Note something interesting:

    The number of kids sent to pediatric intensive care units (PICUs) doubled between 2004 and 2015, a team at the University of Chicago Medicine Comer Children’s Hospital found.

    Of course, the article doesn’t mention what that number actually is or how it fluctuates from year to year or how it relates to changes in overall PICU intake. Because that might make panic seem stupid, and we all know we’re having an opioid apocalypse.

     

    Should I take this personally? Well, I’m not on Facebook anymore, so I guess it’s moot.

     

    Someone has NOT gotten with the narrative.

     

    Lord of The Flies comes to mind.

     

    Weekday edition of Old Guy Music. From the brilliant movie “The History of Future Folk,” a plaintive ballad. Hondo!

  • Sunday Morning Pie In the Sky Memorial Links

    Sunday Morning Pie In the Sky Memorial Links

    Fault is easy to find in this instance. Pie wrote a fine piece this week on Romanian wines, and showed me a category of wine I haven’t tried and you may as well show me the smooth body of a young girl. I’m there. So SP and I made the trek up to Milwaukee, the closest source of the intriguing Feteasca Neagra (Pie will forgive my inability to get the funny accent marks correct), a red wine made from the eponymous grape, a native of Romania (rather than an adapted variety from elsewhere). The first place we went, the salesman was helpful but somewhat befuddled. “I could have sworn we had some bottles of this, and our inventory shows there’s five of them somewhere…” After much digging and consultation with the store manager, they figured out that the inventory was a mistake. FUCK! But, they helpfully determined at another store nearby had stock and sent us in that direction, after observing, “No-one has ever asked for that wine before.” Extra points to the salesguy for not misusing the word “varietal,” one of those nails-on-chalkboard things for me.

    At Store #2, the salesman (after overcoming surprise from people actually asking for this) found their stock quickly, two different ones from the same producer (Cramele Recas) and upon observing the low prices, we grabbed half a dozen bottles. Since Pie liked the La Putere cuvee, and the name was vaguely reminiscent of prostitution, we started there. The good parts: very full bodied, smooth despite the relatively high alcohol, big fruit and spice, quite distinctive. It smoothed out a bit with air, and paired with dinner, it came across as almost sweet. The bottle drained rapidly. The bad parts: screwcap (that is not a closure which is good for development with aging), American oak (that was a bit jarring- why not Slovenian?) with a bit too much new wood. It’s very slick and commercial. Nonetheless, for ten bucks, we were happy. I’d love to try this variety made from perhaps a cooler area, not as much wood, lower levels of manipulation (e.g., more barrels, fewer chips), and cork-finished. But that said, we’d drink this regularly, and several hat tips to Pie for expanding our horizons.

    OK, enough wine talk, let’s have links!

    Trump actually gets off a few good lines. There’s even some self-deprecation, which is more than Obama could ever manage. My favorites:

    “I just want to say this, this is one of the best times I’ve had with the media — this might be the most fun I’ve had since watching your faces on Election Night.”

    “We were late tonight because Jared could not get through security.”

    “As far as the risk of dealing with a madman is concerned, that’s [Kim Jong Un’s] problem, not mine.”

     

    “President for Life.” Figure that only happens in dictatorships and shitholes. Or maybe other places as well

     

    This sort of thing has always ended well… I hope that the vicious bigot Bishop Desmond Tutu is smiling.

     

    His ex will unveil the statue so she can set him up one last time.

     

    They’ve learned how to manipulate the media from the Parkland puppets. Two people quit and it gets headlines.

     

    Old Guy Music! This is a guy I used to see regularly in Austin, and has made a pretty decent career for himself. Here’s a rollicking little number from one of his Japan tours. Oldsters will remember Shakey’s.

  • Saturday Morning How Do I Top This? Links

    Saturday Morning How Do I Top This? Links

    I feel like my Uncle Eddie.

    Eddie wasn’t really my uncle, he was my dad’s best friend, but still, Uncle Eddie. Eddie was a rather fearsome fellow, remarkably talented and intelligent, and (unlike my dad, who was remarkably kind and considerate) completely lacked in any shits to give regarding people’s feelings. He was smart, sarcastic, cutting, snarky, and merciless.

    I loved Uncle Eddie.

    In any case, Eddie’s employer decided to send him to a course, named after a best selling author of yore, which would (they hoped) help him to smooth over his rough edges. This was futile in that Eddie was nothing but rough edges, but they were tired of having person after person quit after being verbally ripped to shreds when their work was anything less than Eddie’s exacting standards. Part of the course was persuasive public speaking. The class was given an exercise: each person would stand up and extemporaneously give a speech that was supposed to arouse emotion in the audience. Person after person spoke, and because sadness is an easy emotion to tap, they all told sob stories, one after another. Near the end, a blind guy in the class got up and started speaking about his seeing eye dog. He spoke at length about the bond between them, the way the dog became almost part of him in a way that most humans couldn’t understand, how the dog transformed his life and gave him a love and devotion that could never be duplicated. He went on to talk about the dog’s eventual decline in old age, then talked about the night he held the old dog in his arms as the dog finally died. The class was in tears.

    Now it was Eddie’s turn.

    He stood up, shook his head sadly, and observed, “It’s tough to follow a dog act…”

    This aroused emotion in the audience, and Eddie was lucky to escape alive. And that is how I feel trying to follow SugarFree. Well, no matter, links must be served.

    What I’m taking away from this is that you’d do well to let incredibly corrupt and capable lawyers set up things like this rather than approaching it as a businessman. There’s much to learn from the Clintons.

    As long as there’s money to be raised and publicity to be hounded, there’s people you can always count on.

    And as long as there’s meaningless moral preening points to be made, there’s people you can count on to make them, while of course relentlessly self-promoting. This would be delightfully easy to intersectionally troll. “Wait, you visually decide? It’s not physical, it’s a social construct, you shitlord!”

    Speaking of which, here’s an example of toxic masculinity in action.

    This is the kind of shit that drives me crazy. A basic question is asked of a physicist, he gives a very standard answer, the reporter doesn’t understand it, and voila! clickbait ensues. The correct answer, Mr. They-Don’t-Teach-Science-In-J-School is, “Just because you can formulate a grammatically correct question doesn’t mean that it’s physically meaningful. There is no such thing as ‘before’ the beginning of time, it is a meaningless phrase, and Hawking tried to tell you that.” TW: Neil deGrasseTyson.

    There are some questions that really don’t need to be asked.

    And just because. Miss you, dude.

    In today’s Old Guy music, I’m reminded of why They Might Be Giants might be the best pop band ever. This is one of their lesser-known songs, but it shouldn’t be.

  • Sunday Morning Links of Pain

    Not that SP and I over-indulged yesterday. Nosirree, we would never do anything like that. We’re too mature and classy, at least she is- and I have proof, it was on her report card last semester. In actuality, while drinking, we watched the DW Griffith version of “Abraham Lincoln,” mostly because it was DW Griffith’s first talkie and had Walter Huston in the title role. It needed more alcohol, but there were definitely a few fun spots, including some actors in blackface, and some scenes with Walter Huston made up to look like The Joker. Surprisingly, the screenplay was by Stephen Vincent Benet, one of my favorite authors, who demonstrated that hagiography was apparently his only weakness as a writer.

    OK, what’s the news today? Of course, the Big Story is Team Blue demonstrating that they can lie just as effectively as Team Red, just at greater length. The idea that the people paying for all this shit ought to be able to actually see the court filings is crazy talk. The idea of secret courts and domestic spying being unconstitutional is even crazier talk. I mean, that sounds crazy enough to come from libertarians!

    Fun fact: the constitution is unconstitutional. There are some ideas that are so stupid that it takes professors to believe them.

    What’s Spanish for “kabuki”? Another story where I just hate everyone involved.

    Fuck California. Seriously. I lived most of my adult life there and couldn’t imagine going back to that authoritarian shithole. I don’t often root for law enforcement to actually come to personal harm, but in this case (as with drug and vice cops), I wouldn’t shed any tears if it did happen.

    Not satisfied with using taxpayer-funded land and receiving massive subsidies to produce dead animals parts for human consumption, the US Cattlemen’s Association (that name is problematic!!!!) is trying to get the government to play whup-ass on producers of meat imitations, rather than compete in a free market. Because millions of times a day, people mistake veggie burgers for ground up cow, and it’s all about protecting the people rather than rent-seeking. This is my shocked face.

    More shocking news: ratings for the corrupt enterprise we laughingly call the Olympics are down. If this trend continues, how will the poor folks in the IOC get bribed by politicians? And how will the few remaining television viewers be able to experience the thrills of trash sports, 24/7?

    Music Time! From Dead Kennedys covers to Sibelius in 24 hours. This is a brilliant composition, and the buildup from the start of the Intermezzo to a stunning march gives me chills every time I hear it.

  • Saturday Morning Family Friendly Links

    When researching themes for the links, I occasionally find out interesting tidbits. Today marks the anniversary of the death of Dr. Thomas Bowdler, the original Family Friendly guy, who brought the world a cleaned up version of that notorious pornographer, William Shakespeare. He also was the inspiration of the word “bowdlerize,” a successful physician, and a master-level chess player. Oddly enough, it is nearly impossible to find pictures of him- apparently he never rated a portrait. So I can only use my imagination.

    In any case, I need to roll out links as discussion points amongst you folks with an unusually close relationship with your maternal parent.

    Arabs do what Arabs do, and the UN does what the UN does. I know, let’s send in troops! That should fix things.

    Serious question: can someone name a car rental company that isn’t involved in the latest round of social signaling and useless symbolism in support of the destruction of our constitutional rights? Not that I’m a big fan of the NRA, given its history of mindless support of cops, but I wish businesses would go back to the idea of being businesses and stop alienating their customers by immersing themselves in the outrage du jour.

    An old tradition has been revived. Sorta. Pro tip: cold areas are not ideal if you want to make an impression.

    Billionaire offers to save taxpayers a chunk of money. Outrage ensues. I would have thought that having a rich guy pay for government over and above his mandatory taxes would delight progressives, but I suppose that my search for and shred of intellectual consistency will have to continue.

    I’m not sure how to make this story Family Friendly. When I read through it, I marveled at how delightfully weird people can be, so at least there’s amusement.

    It’s time for Old Guy Family Friendly Music, and this go-round, a delightful cover of my favorite song from the punk era.

  • Last Minute Slapdash Morning Links

    Quick, cheap, high quality- pick two. In this case it’s quick and free, the latter of which offends my Hebraic sensibilities.  This is what “Hey, Old Man, you have five minutes to put together a post” looks like.

    CNN scripts Town Hall questions, calls shooting survivor a liar. Keep it classy, CNN!

    I’ll never understand the British. Never.

    “Racially insensitive food.” And it’s not the delightfully named “Tetes de Negres.” This time.

    “I have no idea what you’re talking about. Prove it.” I hope she countersues and makes her lawyers rich(er).

    I am jealous, truly.

    Sorry folks, this won’t happen again. Oh wait, yeah, it probably will.

     

  • ACLU, RIP

    It’s no secret that in counting from 1 to 10, the ACLU seems to always skip 2. It’s also no secret that they have a continuing habit of conflating, “You have a right to do X” with, “You have a right to demand taxpayer money to do X,” and their remarkably immoral support of Mandated Racism Affirmative Action is stunningly hypocritical. More and more, they seem to have lost sight of their purported mission, despite flashes here and there of doing something good. But this morning when I clicked over to their site to read an article about our loss of Fourth Amendment rights in the notorious 100 mile zone, I got this popup:

    Remember when they used to beg, “Donate monthly to fight Obama’s attacks on people’s rights” after the arrests of journalists, the abuse of the IRS to attack his political enemies, the drone killing of Americans, record-setting deportations, expanded domestic spying, and stepped-up incarceration rates for victimless crimes? Yeah, me neither.

    So at this point, it’s not a matter of the mask slipping, it’s been totally removed. The ACLU is nothing but an arm of the Democratic Party, no different than MoveOn.org or Democratic Underground, and now doesn’t even pretend otherwise.

    That sound you hear is Nat Hentoff and other principled civil libertarians of yore spinning in their graves.

  • Who Wants To Be President?

    An amusing news story yesterday caused some discussion. These seem to pop up every year or so and are generally used as a way for academics to bash their latest not-a-leftist target. Eight straight years of “see, Bush is horrible!” followed by eight straight years of “Obama is dreeeeamy!” sort of triggered my cynicism meter. Of course, the inclusion of presidents still in office is de rigeur for sending the desired signals, and putting Trump on the list after barely a year in office is reminiscent of Obama’s affirmative action Nobel Peace Prize, just before he started six new wars and began drone-killing Americans.

    Likewise, historians love presidents who were incredibly active, preferably ones who killed a few hundred thousand people. The bias that “doing something” is better than “leaving us alone” is a powerful means of slanting the ratings. So given OUR biases as libertarians, how would you rank our presidents?

    My own personal feeling is that there’s probably 5 or six great ones, five or six horrendous ones, and most of the rest form a blob in the middle and ranking them is useless.

    My Top Five:

    1. Calvin Coolidge- did a wonderful job of leaving us alone, and look what happened. Economic boom time, which only ended when a more activist president and congress decided to start meddling.
    2. George Washington- for doing what every president ought to do: serve his time, then go home and shut up. I put him here in the top 5 because he wasn’t John Adams.
    3. Grover Cleveland- someone whose first instinct is to avoid federal action unless specifically demanded by the constitution ought to get more libertarian love. And he had a wonderful way of phrasing.
    4. Bill Clinton- wait, what? His arrival here wasn’t due to anything he deliberately did, but what he managed to do accidentally was totally tie the government into knots so that they were too busy with perjury and blowjobs to fuck things up. Economic boom, balanced budgets, only minor wars, who can complain?
    5. William Henry Harrison- for the obvious reason.

    My Bottom Five:

    45. Richard Nixon- the guy who came close to killing a million, brought us the War On Drugs, the EPA, wage-and-price controls, “Affirmative Action,” decoupling of currency from hard assets… he was a fucking disaster, top to bottom.
    44. Lyndon Johnson- easily the most corrupt and murderous human to ever occupy the Oval Office. Besides killing millions, he halted the progress of black Americans and destroyed their next several generations.
    43. Woodrow Wilson- it was hard to not rank him the worst, and I think a good argument could be made for that. Besides getting us into a world war and setting the conditions for an even bigger one, he was famous for his intense racism, his love of eugenics, his complete disregard for the constitution, and… well, I can think of absolutely nothing in the favor of that disgusting piece of shit.
    42. James Buchanan- sometimes the historians are right.
    41. John Adams- the Alien and Sedition Act and the Quasi War sent the US in the wrong direction from which we still haven’t fully recovered.

    I have not towed the libertarian lion of putting Lincoln in that bottom five, mostly because (unlike the guys there) he was a mixed bag and besides the obvious evil, accomplished some great things as well (like Amendment XIII). And FDR came oh so close to the final cut, and I would not argue about his inclusion…

    OK, my droogs, discuss.

  • Tuesday Morning Hey It’s Not Sloopy Links

    And I bet after this weekend’s fun, you’re too scared to click on any links I put up. Well, you sometimes have to have faith.

     

    Oh noes, let’s keep the Scare Machine working.

    “Last night I told my wife I would take a bullet for the kids,” said Robert Parish, a teacher at an elementary school just miles from Marjory Stoneman Douglas High, where a former student killed 17 people, including three staff members who found themselves in the line of fire. Since the attack last week, said Mr. Parish, “I think about it all the time.”

    Curious if Mr. Parish spends just as much time thinking about lightning strikes, too. I’m guessing probability and statistics weren’t part of the Education curriculum.

    It’s always nice when voting district boundaries are arbitrarily set by unelected and unaccountable lawyers wearing black dresses.

    Preliminary analyses of the new map showed congressional races in the state being much more competitive for Democrats.

    This is my shocked face.

    In another shocker, Amazon has invented a technology that monitors fucking-off time and can be used to improve their efficiency. To be fair, I’d never consent to wearing this shit, but the key word here is “consent.” Of course, the socialists are birthing a bovine.

    As a company, Amazon is simply too powerful and must be dismantled. Under capitalism, the scientific and technological advancements made are being used to squeeze every last ounce of profit out of workers. We must liberate the productive forces of society from the capitalists in order to benefit the many, instead of continuing on the current trend of the vast majority being driven into the abyss of slave-like low-wage labor.

    “Slave.” You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means. And really, this is much creepier– creepy enough that I think it’s the future for the Glibertarians’ staff.

     

    “I tried.” And you managed to re-invigorate a faded career. Well played.

     

    Young horny New Zealanders, take hope!

     

    Music from the Dinosaur Tour. I had a sentimental frisson- not only was I a big Cream fan as a youngster, this was the first song I ever learned to play on the guitar. It is a bit weird to see Jack Bruce playing that particular bass- was he channeling McCartney?