Glibertarians.com 2018 Archive

Author: jesse.in.mb

  • Wednesday Afternoon Links

    Hola a todos, Brett is in meetings all day, so he’s letting me take over for the afternoon.

    • California is still on fire, and a former nuclear research site got burned. Oops. Fires are currently burning across the mountain west with concentrated activity in Idaho/Utah/Nevada and just east of the Cascades, which is just crazy since everyone knows that California’s forestry management policies are causing the fires…across 8 states.
    • Floridian—who looks like every middle aged man I know who does local community theater—has a bunch of jihaddi preferred explosives “for homemade fireworks.” “‘The white crystal powder [TATP] has been referred to as ‘Mother of Satan’ by terrorist organizations who have used it in deadly attacks around the world,’ the Volusia County Sheriff’s Office said in a statement.”
    • Speaking of Florida, our solar system is apparently about to get rocked by a “dark matter hurricane” but you probably won’t notice much unless you have severe axion sensitivity along with your EMF and gluten sensitivity.
    • Lotta folks are on losartan thanks to the Western Pattern Diet, if you are one of those people, you might want to have a chat with your GP about this recall. In related news, the USG is *begging* you to at least take the stairs instead of your off-road-capable mobility scooter. The big take away is that even brief activity counts toward the backstop goal of 150 minutes of activity per week (a week is 10080 minutes) as recommended by the AHA.

    Today’s musical number the video may be potentially work-unfriendly. If that got you in trouble, I apologize.

  • Monday Afternoon Links

    Some of you may get the impression that we at Glibertarians really enjoy beating up on Brett for being insanely unreliable. That couldn’t be further from the truth; we enjoy beating up on Brett for his Brettness. His fickleness and last minute ghosting on links duty is just a convenient excuse for a verbal soap party.

    The British government is trying to tackle loneliness with prescription dance and cooking classes. I just spent a week in an independent living facility and I can see the value in that kind of socializing. The proposals are less ridiculous than the mandatory broccoli, but it’s interesting to watch state run healthcare trot down this course.

    Speaking of the Brits: Duchess Meghan, Prince Harry are expecting their first child in the spring…*cries*. I’m a little annoyed Megan Duchess of York news keeps getting floated for me just because I tried to find the uncensored version of the pics from that one party Harry attended that one time.

    Kim Kardashian and Kanye West met with Yoweri Museveni, whose leadership of Uganda is almost as old as I am. I don’t know why but I find everything about this passage mind-blowing:

    The President [Museveni] earlier in the day tweeted, “I welcome American entertainment stars Kanye West and @KimKardashian to Uganda. I held fruitful discussions with the duo on how to promote Uganda’s tourism and the arts.”

    This is a man whose presidency is old enough to be a Millenial and he’s @ing Kim Kardashian like it’s just what you do.

    You guys may have Autumn with your blaze of orange, red and gold leaves, but a California Fall is ablaze with…you know… actual fire. Also I was just in the greater Rochester area this last week and I’d like to call shenanigans on this whole Autumn thing. It was 83°F, humid and sunny the whole time.

    And because everyone likes Shakira covered in crude oil, your music of the day.

  • Friday Night – Links After Dark

    It has been a long week. A long week of nothing but Brett Kavanaugh news. Having told my news feed I didn’t want any stories tagged “Kavanaugh” twice, it started floating stories about “Supreme Court” “Law” “Dr. Ford” all of which got banned 1-2 times. Eventually it just started floating 6+ stories a day tagged “TRENDING” and occasionally “Anita Hill” which got my phone put in airplane mode for the past two days.

    Now that I’m avoiding news. I’m trying my best to fill my online time with pictures of Hemsworth brothers shirtless, but even the celeb gossip rags have nothing for me because they’re all talking about people I’ve never heard of or have purposefully forgotten. Except for dear, sweet Gwyneth Paltrow who is getting married to someone I’ve never heard of after being badly abused by the CA government for misleading consumers with vaginal rejuvenation eggs. Luckily she takes everything in stride.

    And just to convey my disdain for this week more completely: a musical number

  • Wednesday Afternoon Links

    Before Rufus gets a chance to ask the question: yes, some of us DO work. One of those people is apparently Brett. I guess getting loaded on cocaine and blowing strangers is just for fun. In his absence, I’ll be providing links. If someone posted something earlier, I apologize. I haven’t been paying attention.

    • Cody Wilson’s no good, very bad day. I want to believe this guy has been caught up in a plot to “neutralize” him, but he seems to have set served himself up on a silver platter by signing up for a site called SugarDaddyMeet, exchanging nudes with a minor (article says the girl was *under* 17 the age of consent in Texas [you’re welcome for keeping you off a list by looking it up for you]), and then hiring her for sex. The bragging about being “a big deal” may not have been helpful either.
    • I’m sure all of you nerds have already seen that Linus Torvalds–father of Linux–is taking a breather so that he can think about not being a dick to a group of people volunteering their time. In the wake of this there’s now a code of conduct, which has of course been immediately decried as the SJWification of the Linux kernel. I’m currently fantasizing about Buddhist monastic life.
    • Normally, this story would have me glancing at the headline and moving on, but how can I resist linking to a story with the phrase “rape by use of drugs, oral copulation by anesthesia or controlled substance”. The surgeon in question is relatively pretty, and I can guarantee his near future will include rigorous training on the value of consent.
    • I assume this is just fake news meant to fluff The Meg, but it’s still neat. “the males would each travel in a V-shape pattern as many as 140 times a day. It’s unclear if the behavior is related to mating or if they are hunting for different species of fish.”
    • Speaking of unfortunate interactions between adults and minors, Mr. Michael Aliperti threatened to shoot an 11 year old who beat him at Fortnight and got arrested for it. Mr. Aliperti should fix a cup of chamomile and take a long hard look at where life has taken him.

    Our user engagement analytics department indicates that we need more Minnesota content, so…here

  • What Are We Drinking; or a very special National Tequila Day Post

    Dearest Glibertariat, as some of you may know (or not), every day is a national day of something, to the point where the entire concept almost becomes empty…like my glass…right this second *runs off to fix that*, but what you need to know is that July 24th–TODAY–is national tequila day, and I can think of no better reason to clear some space off of your shelf and celebrate the pluralism of ‘murrica by drinking something that cannot be legally produced here! I have recruited the Boyfriend (henceforth TBF) to help me drink a bit of every  tequila in my home and asked the other Glibs to join in with their notes on such an effective beverage.

    My portion of this is storied including a reposado that I received as a gift for marrying a couple who met on TOS, a bottle given to me by my aunt and destroyed by a theater major 14 years ago, a couple of bottles that my roommate LOVES and a bottle of mezcal that she declines to finish, so I’ll be helpful. We’ll be rolling through easiest to hardest to drink.

    Mixed tequilas as found in jesse’s house

    Clase Azul Reposado

    • Jesse: This is too easy to drink, almost desserty. Nice notes of vanilla, kinda sweet. I can sip this at room temp and not flinch.
    • TBF: Really smooth. I’m guessing oak-barrel aged [J: we looked, he guessed right]. It’s the color of honey and has citrus, vanilla and clove notes.

    Casa Noble Reposado

    This has a special place in my heart. 15 years ago my aunt gave me this bottle, which I saved for New Year’s Eve. I brought this and a bottle of OJ, took the first sip of the tequila and gave the OJ to someone who had a bottle of vodka and looked lost…it made her night and I proceeded to drink the Casa Noble straight all night until a theater major cracked the cork into the bottle and I—most of the bottle deep at this point, and quite possibly stoned (things are fuzzy here)–proceeded to spend the night enjoying it in reverse. Because of the corking it’s sat on a shelf for years and I’m using today as an excuse to try it again.

    • TBF: You goofed. I can tell this was good once but it’s oxidized to shit. All the flavors are muted to the point of being uninteresting. I’m getting some wood and leather, it’s like drinking Jesus’s sex dungeon, but it’s incredibly smooth.
    • Jesse: [glumly] I goofed. *pours out the rest of the bottle with chunks of cork floating in it, contemplates buying a new bottle because it was that good…even at this price point.

    Espelon Reposado and Espelon Añejo (bourbon barrel aged)

    I’m pairing these together because they were similar. The reposado was a bit softer than the Añejo, which we found surprising, and the reposado was a bit simpler with the Añejo having a more complicated and more bourbon-ey profile.

    • TBF: *cracks reposado bottle open* HELLOOOO SPRING BREAK. This is all very agave, very drinkable, but not a ton of complexity.  This screams going to a frat party in your sweatpants senior year of college. This is why your roommate’s margaritas are so good. I just thought she was skilled. *tries the añejo* way more complex, more vanilla and bit harsher. The bourbon notes ask the question “Jesse, why are you making me drink tequila when you have bourbon in your house?” This is a frat party in sweatpants in KY.
    • Jesse:  If we kill off everything  below [the reposado] and make this the plastic jug tequila the world will be a better (or maybe worse) place. Still sippable but we’ve definitely stepped down a tier from the Clase Azul and Casa Noble [circa 2004]. The añejo is good, but I’m happier with the reposado *has more reposado*.

    Mezcal Embajador de Oaxaca (blanco)

    Kinda the oddball here. I hoped TBF would enjoy it since he likes Islays. My roommate decided it was undrinkable and I’ve been chipping away at it for a while.

    • TBF: This smells like nail polish and smoke. It’s like a structure fire at a nail salon off the nose. *Sips* Do moonshine distilleries explode like meth labs? You know what, they probably do. That’s what I’m getting from the flavor. Can we go back to the Clase Azul?
    • Jesse: I’m getting more smoke and less “Vietnamese women perishing in a fire”. It’s got a warm front, extremely bland middle and smoky/spicy finish. It’s surprisingly easy drinking for how smoky it is, but not particularly interesting. I’m definitely circling back to the Clase Azul.

     

  • Thursday Afternoon Links

    Artist’s rendition of BrettL hopped up on Bathsaltz and Florida sunshine

    Hey guys, it’s Thursday and Brett is either high on bathsaltz, covered in bacon fat and wrasslin’ gators or in some kind of very dull workplace meeting (your imagination knows best), so I’m filling in today. All links are safe for work, so feel free to you know, click through and then make salient comments about them.

    • Florida oysters viciously murder 71-year-old man. You knew it wasn’t safe to swim in Florida water with open wounds, but you apparently also shouldn’t eat the shellfish while vaguely immunocompromised. VISIT FLORIDA TODAY!
    • We all know that those dastardly Millenials are killing everything from industrial beer production to fabric softener, but what will they be responsible for killing next? Themselves, apparently: A Spike In Liver Disease Deaths Among Young Adults Fueled By Alcohol. Drink up, me hearties, yo ho!
    • I’m guessing you guys are just as into the fringiest Christian eschatology of (repeatedly proven) false prophets/straw-grasper Rabbi Jonathan Cahn and opportunistic asshole John Hagee as I am, so I’ll give you a heads up that a BLOOD MOON (or for the less dramatic: lunar eclipse) is happening soon and it’ll be the longest in the last century. Look to the heavens the night of 07/27 if it’s visible in your area and the weather is good, for the four horsemen will totally be coming this time.
    • Out of respect for/fear of one of the most powerful of us, I will not label this story but will only mention that those who like things trapped in amber, or issues of a herpatological nature might find the story interesting.
    • Speaking of herps, hackers may have the latest results from your HSV1/2 test Hackers Breach Network of LabCorp, US’ Biggest Blood Testing Laboratories, so you may want to engage in some proactive radical honesty with your sex partner(s). Currently the intrusion seems like it was contained and no confidential information was accessed, but that’s always how these things start and then it’s Russians reading your emails and making fun of your use of comic sans. Just be glad those doofy Chevy HHRs aren’t autonomous…yet
    • For the nerds among us…I assume that’s most of you: CNET’s 2018 SDCC roundup. I know you’re all nerds in your unique and meaningful ways and I’m not going to enact your labor if I don’t have to.

    Huh, I’m being told that not including a music link is a grievous sin. I’ll let this raccoon DJ some background jams for you while you curate your tittaaaays and whatnot.

  • Friday Afternoon Links

    Gutentag, Glibertariat! It’s Friday. I hope you’re all enjoying it. Now the depressing state of the world…except the bit about the Commonwealth, it’s emotionally neutral…just like its new leader.

    Multistate Outbreak of E. coli O157:H7 Infections Linked to Chopped Romaine Lettuce. I know this is oldish news, but the affected area keeps expanding. You officially have Glib permission to throw a tantrum is someone serves salad…for now.

    ‘World’s worst’ super-gonorrhoea man cured. *Books flight to Thai red-light district immediately* This is a gentle and slightly drippy reminder that you should wear a condom during your sex tourism and we should probably up our game in the microbial arms race, because staph and gonorrhea certainly have.

    No Surprise: Charles to Succeed Queen as Commonwealth Head. Huh, I remember talking about this over drinks with folks from various Commonwealth countries a decade ago and they thought Charles would never lead the Commonwealth because of his intense blandness, so I’m surprised, but whatever.

    China has a few animal welfare stories recently: Kangaroo in zoo dies after being pelted by bricks from tourists trying to see it hop and China black market demand for ‘cocaine of the sea’ pushes two marine species closer to extinction in Mexico. The population of vaquita–the cutest cetacean you never knew you needed more of in your life–is down to 12 because the Chinese want totoba swim bladders for beauty reasons. The supply has dwindled and demand is high enough that they can go for over twenty grand, and as such have become valuable purely for their rarity.

    In memoriam:

    Avicii

  • Wednesday Afternoon Links

    I’d apologize but that would be showing signs of weakness, so instead I give you UNBROKEN EYE CONTACT.

    TMZ publishes some screenshots of alleged bomber’s blog posts from a ways back. He sounds like a peach.

    Israeli Defense Chief Regrets Clearing 2007 Syria Nuclear Reactor Strike for Publication: Israel claimed credit for the 2007 attack, 11 years after it was carried out to stop Syria from developing a nuclear capacity with North Korean help. Haaretz is being useful by putting everything you need to know about the news in the headline and making the article about the politics behind the news, which are kinda fun.

    Speaking of Israel, this is one girl lucky to still be alive. Try this in Egypt or Lebanon or Syria and see what happens.

    Most of kidnapped schoolgirls freed, Nigeria says. The rest of the world responds with “wait, that was STILL going on? WTF?” Edit: “Most of the 110 schoolgirls kidnapped last month in Nigeria by the terror group Boko Haram have been released and returned to their hometown of Dapchi, a Nigerian minister said Wednesday.” Late links are bad links y’all.

  • Wednesday Afternoon Links

    Happy Pi Day fellow Glibs. At Akira’s suggestion I made a shoofly pie based on the NYT recipe, shamelessly stolen from an 1860s Amish family cookbook (cultural appropriation at it’s flakiest and sweetest). It was delightful and my coworkers have been gently brought back under my control except the one doctor that grokked I was just trying to get them all fat. The Verge is already in before you start grousing about Tau Day, so don’t, not that it’ll stop you since it’s like herding cats below the fold.

    Breitbart reports having pictures of Hawking’s last moments on Earth

    The Chinese reporter’s eye-roll that turned a fawning question into an unmissable TV moment. Better than Kim K’s derriere doing it, I suppose. Aww bummer:

    But hours later, Liang’s media accreditation to cover the NPC was revoked, according to one of her colleagues.

    By Tuesday night, her personal Weibo page had been taken down and search results of her name on the social media platform were censored.

    Duterte to withdraw Philippines from ICC after “outrageous attacks.” File this under shit got too real:

    The decision marks a stunning about-face by Duterte, who has repeatedly dared the ICC to indict him and said he was willing to “rot in jail” or go on trial to defend a war on drugs that has killed thousands of his own people. […]

    Last month, he indicated he would cooperate with the ICC examination and even said he would prefer a firing squad to prison.

    Meet the students of Saudi Arabia’s first driving school for women. Saudi Arabia is stepping into the 20th Century. It reminds me of this possibly apocryphal story about women drivers and the House of Saud.

    Like the other instructors, Dr. Deema Alsekait has a driver’s license from living abroad. Hers is from the state of Virginia. Saudi leaders lifted the driving ban in part to boost women’s participation in the workforce as the economy diversifies away from oil.

    We’ve been made aware of the commentariat’s…appreciation for tits, and wish to include this gift of tits for you as a value-added perk to Afternoon Links

  • Afternoon Links

    Friends! It has been so long. Brett is in a post-apocalyptic wasteland and his second through fourth string replacements are working (yes, Rufus, some of us work). So you get some slap-dash, last-minute links from me:

    Florida legislature! “Florida House declares pornography as a health risk: Republican Rep. Ross Spano says there is research that finds a connection between pornography use and mental and physical illnesses.” Republicans are apparently aiming to be the party of science now. Good for them.

    Now here’s some science. “Drinking Alcohol Helps Better Than Exercise If You Want To Live Past 90 Years Old” Guess what, we at Glibertarians don’t care if this is good science or not. 건배!!

    Rejoice! He’s in a far better place than this. “Billy Graham, preacher to millions, adviser to U.S. presidents, dies at 99”

    Time to sit your boss down and have The Talk.  “Phishing schemes net hackers millions of dollars from Fortune 500: IBM has uncovered sophisticated campaigns which are successfully targeting Fortune 500 companies.”