Author: Brett L

Monday? Is it still only Monday? I worked until about 3am (to be fair, I didn’t really get fired up until 8pm) and was up getting kids ready before 6:00. I think it’s Monday, and I hope this is the Glibertarians Afternoon Links slot. If this is the company wiki, I’m about to be out of a jerb.

Dems realize that nobody gives a shit that the Federal Government “closed”, agree to end closure. My neighbors across the street just had a baby last week and grandma got an extra day with her daughter and new grandson out of this.

This is pretty much everything I think about the modern US Navy. It’s a long way from “We’ll cross a frozen river on Christmas to kill you in your sleep.”*

*Technically not the Navy, but given that material…

Oh joy, Wonder Woman 2… THAT’S NOT FUNNY!! (may not be the actual subtitle). As someone pointed out, the first movie was basically Captain America, pushed back a war — probably to prevent a lawsuit — with a woman so beautiful that she lowers male IQ 30 points and men didn’t care. I don’t know if that’s going to work for a second feature-length film

Since we have lots of cooking nerds and history nerds, here is a nerd who recreates historical food.

This is basically what my head has sounded like all day.

Okay, well, I’m just about well enough to start drinking my way through Friday afternoon, although there’s a good chance my kids will be drawing on my face in permanent marker by 8:00tonight. Hopefully, not dicks unless my wife is particularly annoyed with me and gets them started.

This thing that happens regularly since the Clinton administration is All Trump’s Fault! Meh. If only the government were to actually shut down.

Mattis unveils new Russia and China strategy. Will roundhouse kick them to space if they don’t shape up.

CNBC finds the one TSA crew in the world doing their job.

The latest on the Las Vegas mass murder. It looks to me like a Whitman style attack where a smart guy got sick in the head and figured out a good way to kill a lot of people — the same way, get a high spot that is hard to get to in a target-dense environment and shoot a lot of rounds.

Dicks on face or not, I think I’ll just stay here and drink.

Well, my body is no longer attempting to fire my guts out my asshole every 10 minutes. So I’ve got that going for me. I still feel like hammered shit, but I won’t let that stop me.

Drag is a labor issue. (H/T SF, now you know how he gets his material)

That sonofabitch Trump wants to let trans-people die untreated if they don’t have the right religious views!

Let’s play a game: Venezuela or Whole Foods.

Brooklyn brings shower bus to homeless masses.

I’m so out of it, this finally made sense to me.

Is it Tuesday? Monday? Wednesday. I know it ain’t Friday. You know what else I know now — I won’t kick my wife out of bed for eating crackers. No, literally. She was sick last night and ate crackers in bed. And I decided I loved her more than I hate crumbs in bed. So there’s today’s love story.

SO I’m going to go with 80% chance Trump did say “shithole countries“. But given that Dick Durbin is the apparent source, and he’s a lying fuck, I can’t be certain.

In my ongoing needling of Californian Glibs, I offer this further proof of 3rd worldism.

Zoolander 3 is pretty fucking dark. Err. Wow, that might seem racist. I mean bleak and ugly.

Seal gets the #metoo treatment. Like Omar said, “when you come for the [queen], you best not miss.”

I am not surprised that Ed Sheeran is not at all original. Yes, yes, it happens to the best of them. Sometimes.

Not Ed Sheeran.

Its a holiday for my kids, which means it has been no picnic for my wife and I today. I hope you had an excellent day and your employer did not expect you to labor.

It looks like the Cranberries are out a vocalist unless she comes back a zombie, but at least she didn’t linger.

I’m going to guess that Florida Man had something to do with this: Fire on a boat.

Falcon Heavy is supposed to static fire again today after a launch pad problem last week caused them to scrub after a full fueling. I’ve got the lube and tissues ready. (TW: Autoplay)

Huh, an app that tracks fertility for contraception is being blamed for a rise in pregnancy. Who could have seen this would be less effective than chemical/mechanical contraception?

I guess we’ll do an In Memorium song.

With Brett’s kind indulgence…Swiss Servator adds: Read this – see how far we have come, see how we have failed.

Happy Thursday everyone. This will be my last links of the week as I am attending a nuptials tomorrow afternoon. Given the invite list, I think it is safe to say that I am going to be encouraged to drink heavily after the ceremony. And perhaps before and during! And then my beautiful wife is turning 29 (again!) on Saturday. So, I’m basically mailing it in from here on out. Starting with the links!

As a “libertarian”, I’m not sure I’m in favor of any more government “control” than they already have, but I do admire this congressman’s idea that the US in more in need of “idiot control” than another gun law.

Britain begins to feel its way towards the proud pan-European tradition of holding referendums until they get a vote they like, then quitting.

Listen, buddy, don’t fuck up the commute because you’re an idiot. Pick a less disruptive form of autodarwination.

Florida Man gets a new, faster ride. For when you absolutely, positively have to get to your meth dealer in minutes.

What happens when a country boy drops acid?

Thanks to SP for filling in for me yesterday. I had to get a chipped tooth fixed so I can escape immediate identification as Florida Man until after my unstable and dangerous behavior really takes off. In some new-to-me sports news it looks like the Astros are trying to avoid becoming one-hit-wonders. Or maybe aspiring to become one-hit-wonders. Insert your “traded for more good pitching” pun here.

Canadian hitchhiker brutally dismembered in Philly. Nobody is surprised by this.

Good news. A little caress for your junk.

I would like to remind everyone that I no longer reside in Tallahassee.

For those of you wondering if you have a drinking problem — there’s a website for that! I’m just going to suggest that if the police or lack of funds are your regular ways of stopping, you might want to see about changing things. Or if you’re the chick in the picture.

Meanwhile, in Russia…

Here’s a homeless guy singing a drinking song.

Wow, its good to be back. I got to wrangle the kids all by myself last week and there was a whole lot less poop than I expected. Lots of crying, but I think 4 and 2 are just dramatic ages. Swiss and OMWC took good care of you guys while I was gone.

Sometimes you just have to say Phuket, run naked through the airport and throw shit (literally) at people.

If they have to find 12 non-racist jurors to convict minorities, there’s gonna be a lot of overturned death penalty convictions in GA.

The disappearing sideline reporter in Houston is now found, and showing all the signs of a delusional break with reality. I had a friend almost 15 years ago now who would quit taking his downers, get spun up on a bipolar manic episode and have shit like this happen. Maybe I’m wrong, but that’s my experience.

Lots of people shooting their eyes out! (SFW) Air rifles are blamed, but the time period and age cohort lend themselves to the rise of paintball and airsoft.

I got a one-track mind.