It started so….simply. The CDC said to stay away from Romaine lettuce, until they figured out why it was giving the bloody flux, dropsy, the grippe or whatnot. I shrugged and headed off to work… just a couple of hours, and then I would have a nice 4 day weekend for Thanksgiving.
On the way home, I stopped by the grocery store to pick up a couple of last items for Thanksgiving. “Huh, looks like all the romaine is gone.”
Then I noticed it. The mood was…ugly. The shoppers were already blasting adrenaline, and in a surly disposition. This didn’t help. In fact, it pushed them over the edge…
I was surprised at the lack of response at the store. Bust a shoplifter, and usually there were three squad cars roaring in for the kill (hoping it was a hot 17 or 18 year old perp). Now…nothing. I fled the store, and that is when I found out how bad it was. The cops didn’t come, because this scene was playing out everywhere. And not just the grocery stores. Riots at various and sundry sandwich places….rioting vegetarians and vegans at salad bars. I even saw a burning Sweet Tomatoes restaurant as I tried to make my way home.
Never got there… had to go by too many Panera Bread locations. The primal fury of the quasi-hipster mobs was something to see. How those skinny jeaned, bearded, Planet Fitness members managed to flip over the fire truck, and tear the crew apart…. no, I don’t want to know. I cannot erase the images from my already shaky mind.
The few of us that managed to make it to the farm (corn and soybeans, thank God it wasn’t a lettuce farm) tried to piece it all together. The cops were overwhelmed right away, and the states were collapsing before they could even think about calling out the National Guard. And what were they going to do, with their mess sections already in mutiny. Communications went next…everyone frantically checking their devices for the store that would let them get crazy Aunt Sophie’s @#$%ing salad mix. The net and the cell towers never stood a chance. Transport was impossible, as the roads became a single, extended road-rage episode. Hell, even domestic rabbits and chinchillas went straight at their owner’s throats.
In the quieter moments, when we are not trying to scratch in the soil – hoping for one last head of butter lettuce – I marvel at how fragile our society was. A wanderer did come by and mention that he had heard a few hydroponics outfits in rural Canada may have survived. Come Spring, we may send a scout up that way….but I hold out little hope.
Not sure why I am penning this, in the last pages of a scavenged spiral bound notebook. Vanity, I suppose. Maybe I just hope it will serve as a warning, should the survivors rebuild a civilization someday.
Don’t shit where you grow lettuce.
Comments
279 responses to “The Day Civilization Fell”
The CDC is being paid off by Big Iceberg. I think I read it here 1st.
and since Im not driving anywhere…
Hit that sweet, sweet, motherfkin’ THEME MUSIC !
And a holiday two-fer .
One out of two ain’t bad. I bet they never let Millie Vanillie in the drivers seat!
Especially considering his normal track record.
First the Titanic, now this. Those bastards.
WWZD?
The cornucopia is guns. Duh.
Cleanse?
Give CORRECT ADVICE?
USE GRAIN SLAVES TO GROW GRAIN FOR THE VORTEX.
I heard if you squat down and scratch the ground, you can tame a Turkey…..
A House without Lettuce cannot stand. I’m pretty sure Honest Abe said that back in the day, but please correct me if I’m wrong.
Green beans is as close as we get this year, they are green…..
A house divided without a lettuce stand?
Fuck it. I’m risking it. I’ve got two bags of salad that contain Romaine. I’ll just make sure the 95 year old doesn’t eat any.
Sanitize the salad by filling your stomach with germ-killing alcohol.
That’s my plan. 3 kegs of home brew on tap, a selection of craft beer in the fridge, a fantastic selection of whisk(e)y, and a solid selection of other booze.
Good plan. But what about your guests…
Well, if any of them bring me more alcohol, they’re more then welcome to indulge in some of mine. I’m waiting to see how the girlfriend’s boyfriend reacts to it.
Neph is a CUCK! CUCK! CUCK! CUCK! Ok I’m done. was it good for you to?
This will teach me to comment when drinking (probably not). I meant my niece’s boyfriend (he’s got two families to deal with tomorrow). Today has been a day of cleaning and drinking.
rioting vegetarians and vegans
Do they even have the energy to riot?
I saw rotting vegans….
They’re #rioting
#Rotting
#fierce #rawr #resist #lovetrumpshate
Damn straight we do.
I think this story from 2013 started it.
I can’t tell if that’s from the Onion or not.
Democrat Lawmaker Brings Nuke to Tweet Fight
Throw away your romaine, hog wash. This is the same government that said there where WMD’s. This is the same government that told us to eat mostly carbs or we would get fat. This is the same government that told us JFK was killed by a lone gunman. This is the same government that has a man who eats well done steak as the chief executive. This is the same govt that……..
And instructs you to limit your alcohol consumption to eight units… a week!
No that is just unrealistic. On the other hand, 8 in a night is a very good limit.
Oh ya, I have been lectured about that one. Never tell them the truth.
A unit is what, a pint of whiskey?
19 units
Looks at my home bar.
So I’m good for decades!
Paging Straffin. Straffinrun to the courtesy phone….whats with the masks?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fze5s1SlqB8
Not giving everyone food poisoning?
I see that walking down the street now and then (in NYC). It is 100% of the time an Asian person.
Kinda why I asked our asian correspondent. At the steel mill, I saw japanese contractors doing the same thing. However, in that environment, it made a little more sense.
I just think it’s a bit of over-reaction to “pollution” or the perception thereof. There’s little dirty manufacturing any more here so it’s not an issue – but it’s probably a learned thing from their families. I don’t know about Japan but China is sure polluted AF.
Japan isn’t on the scale of Chinese pollution.
Masks in the video above are probably more like hairnets and gloves in food service here. Elsewhere, if you’re sick or other people are sick. Or just want to avoid social interaction. Or not put on makeup. Seriously.
I have a couple packages of those face masks but I feel too self conscious to wear them here. Japan Airlines describes them as moisture masks and I do wear them onboard and it does seem to make a difference.
The not-spreading-your-illness use case is pretty compelling, but yeah I don’t see it catching on in the states.
https://youtu.be/hL5mKE4e4uU
Another school lunch video. I like this one a little more. It lacks the Ira Glass wannabe narration.
Question: What age is ok to leave your child in your car unattended for roughly 5 minutes? A friend of mine just had to deal with the police after leaving his 5 year old in the car to run into a restaurant to pickup some food. Apparently some woman saw it and immediately called them.
My philosophy is any age is fine on their own for a couple minutes, however I’m weary to do so for the reason above.
I had to do that a couple times over the years to use the restroom I always parked in low traffic spots (on the side of the building etc) because people are busybodies.
I agree any age works I would say 11ish before people don’t start getting involved.
11? Watch your brother, call granma if something happens
/pre cell phone
Nah, not good 5 year olds are dangerous I would be pissed
That is ridiculous. A five year old is fine in the car alone. If I had a young kid today and I needed to run into a store for something and leave the kid alone for a few minutes I would tape a sign on the window, “I am in the store and will BRB, the kid is fine, if you feel the need to be a busy body go fuck yourself, and if you try to get into the locked car and I see you I will shoot you in the face. Have a nice day.”
Good luck with that, even 25 years ago when mine were young that shit don’t fly
My kid is 22 now. I left him in the car when I ran in the liquor store more than once when he was five. Had to, in OK, (where we lived at the time) your kid is not allowed to enter the store. He sat there next to the other cars with kids sitting in the passenger seats. There is nothing wrong with a five year old sitting in a car. What are they going to do? drive off? Get abducted? Whatever. They are fine.
Where I live carjacking might be an issue
Then it seems cops and the community in general have much bigger worries than kids in cars.
Just say’n.
Well, then wouldn’t having a kid in the car help prevent that? Car thieves would want the car without having to deal with a kid.
Well then you live in the wrong area. No offense, but if I lived somewhere where car jacking is an issue I would move.
You monster!
My dad always took me into the store, and the clerks made sure to give me a pretzel stick. I always enjoyed going to the beer store with my dad.
7.
Though I have no Fuck trophies.
These rat fuckers call the cops for every thing their pea brains imagine, and the dip-shit cops come running, despite the obvious absurdity of the callers concerns. When I was a kid the cops would have told the busybody assholes to get a life and call back when you see a crime. I never leave my kid in the car. Just really don’t wanna talk to cops more than I have to
Growing up and continuing into adulthood I have been about as well behaved as you could imagine any non Mormon kid being and I have had the cops and code enforcement called on me dozens of times. Petty tyrants don’t get punished for wasting cops times so I have had the cops called on me for parking in a space that blocked someone’s view of the street, fireworks on forth of July, having a fire pit (which was in a former playground area surrounded by 4 ft on all sides by pea gravel) and more.
Yeah, that shit is all a crime in CA. Like a handcuffs and post bail crime.
This is why I’m glad that
a) my kids are grown and gone
and
b) I don’t have to deal with people very often.
I would have a very hard time keeping myself from shoving “some woman”‘s teeth down her throat.
.. Hobbit
You need to work on your anger issues.
See b) above.
The more I avoid people the better everyone is..
Meh. You seem like a good guy to have a pint with.
No…let the hate flow through you!
Same here. It is way more dangerous to take your kid out, walk across a parking lot full of people stupid enough to call the police immediately, but I also don’t want to get cop-murdered.
I take my kid in everywhere, not because she couldn’t handle 5 minutes in the car, but because I don’t want to deal with some meddling idiot calling the cops on me.
My strategy, were a confrontation to actually happen, is to go on the offensive. Somebody is creeping around my kid in my car? Seems like a child molester from my point of view.
Ha! My wife has done exactly that when confronted by some busy body fuck. I forget exactly what it was about (something on a playground I think), but she immediately went with, “why are you paying so much attention to my kids? You don’t have any kids yourself and you are hanging around a playground?” They pissed right off.
BOOM!
I love that angle.
That is genius.
“I’m gonna have to get your name, and report you, Creepy.”
Were the cops right around the corner and waiting for him when he came out of the restaurant?
I’ve left my 8- and 4-yo in the car while running into grab pre-paid takeout, but bring them along if I expect whatever I’m doing to take more than 2-3 minutes.
When you are sure they aren’t gonna get out unless they are in danger.
Couple weeks back left my 5 year old in the van while we walked through an open-house that caught our eye.
Thanks to technology, she was good for half an hour.
Of course it was street parking and no sidewalk on that side so any busybodies had little chance of spotting her.
I even let her play outside on her own. She’ll be in one of three yards.
Our neighbors are either the parents of kids she plays with(who also allow light supervision in any of our yards), or are age 70+ and don’t know they’re supposed to report all unattended children as being mere seconds from abduction.
Are you an OMWC sock?
J/K
I think it is great you have a kid, how do you keep up?
*Thunderous applause*
I also don’t leave my dog in a car, ever. IF you can’t be bothered to control your child while shopping, maybe consider your life choices, or get a babysitter.
I have no problem leaving the dogs in the car as long as the temperature isn’t above 75*. I don’t leave a window all the way down however, because Big Dog will scare the living crap of anybody that gets within five feet of his head.
A <1 year old strapped into his car seat isn't going anywhere, and I'm not going to 'control' him anyway. Sorry, not getting a babysitter to make a 5 minute
beerformula run.Plan ahead, this is getting dumb
On that we can agree.
The whole country is not CA Yufus. People do that stuff all the time in some areas.
This is true, POV I guess, heat, lack of air, can’t leave it running some criminal will steal it, guess I’m paranoid
Its illegal in AZ, year round.
Ya, well, it is 110 in AZ year around so that makes sense. Not sure a law is needed but I understand.
It was only 80 today…
Don’t bring reality into my exaggerated comment.
FREEZING! I lived there for a year in 93-94 and towards the end, I got really cold and went to get a pendelton out of my truck. On the way I saw a thermometer and it was 85 degrees. Don’t miss that place at all…
I left my five and seven year olds in the car today twice by themselves for a few minutes each time. It was pissing rain and I had to drop off/pick up their three year old brother at his pre school.
*slow clap*
They say the veneer of society will drop within the average of three days suplly of food, most people keep in their French-door refrigerators. This is what Swiss witnessed first hand.
Honestly I thought that was just a normal day in Chicago.
Pictured: Swiss goes to the market
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=qKGBMbLzxzo
I love slice of life pieces.
In the ’94 earthquake we were without power for about a week. No gas pumps, street lights, nothing. People had a massively increased sense of community, and did favors for each other at unheard of levels. The common survival bond is far stronger than I’d have thought.
Unfortunately, the SJWs arrived on the scene since that Golden, Golden Age.
I’ve got a 25cf deep freeze full of vegetables, protein and vacuum sealed leftovers right next to the wine cabinet. I also have a 5kw generator and at least five gallons of gasoline always on hand. Not to mention the propane tank on the grill with a full backup. I’m good for at least a week before I ever have to break into the emergency food supply.
I have a couple cans of soup and some Pop Tarts.
Add some Hormel chili and slim jims and you are good for weeks.
Needs more ramen. For trade fodder.
I feel like Rhywn has other services he could trade in an apocalypse situation.
Good point, and ramen keeps for decades.
I do usually have some on hand. Just not at the moment.
And toilet paper. With that diet, don’t forget massive amounts of toilet paper.
I also know where the Mormons live, so I’m all good.
Generator, a handy brass and lead collection and a very low standard of what I consider food.
Plenty of that on hand too. I’ll save the squirrels and such until I need fresh meat.
I do draw the line at long pig.
Some societies. Tokyo was fine after the big quake in 2011. Hell, even Fukushima prefecture didn’t even come close to rioting or looting. If people don’t give a shit about, or even worse openly hate, their neighbors, that’s when you get the devolution to animal level.
2011 in my part of the world. Small town I inhabited was leveled by a F4 tornado. 90% of people went out of their way to lend a helping hand to those who lost everything.
A few percent of people went looting. They were mostly unsuccessful, but they did manage to steal some things. Those few looters are a scourge that deserve to have their legs broken.
Taking advantage of another person’s tragedy lands you squarely in scumbagville.
That sort of grandstanding is all government does.
To be fair, you kinda also need access to arms. As you know, in Japan there is no right to bear arms and their gun and knife laws are extremely draconian. It is extremely difficult to loot the local FamilyMart on one’s judo skills alone.
Relevant
Mark Steyn on ‘ridiculous’ authority of judges in America
I hate the talk radio format as it exists now. I realize they have to fill 3-4 hours, but there is just so much wasted time.
Sounds like television.
Isn’t most of it ads?
And talking about what we’re about to talk about, without talking about it.
Usually about 26 minutes of ads and a 3 minute news broadcast per hour. So an hour of talk radio has about 31 minutes of content, usually. So MOST of it is content, barely.
Only if all 34(?) minutes of content are actually content.
My God! Steyn was the only person on that panel who isn’t a drooling mongoloid!
That’s his curse these days.
Great read.
Still working on my BIFs. Today is a nice Southern English Brown Ale.
https://www.beeradvocate.com/beer/profile/29061/97798/
Hope you’re enjoying them.
I grow lettuce in my garden that is fertilized with lime and chicken shit. I have yet to contract an illness. That is all.
I think these outbreaks mostly come from human shit, which isn’t used as fertilizer, but what else you gonna do when you’re out in the field picking lettuce and get the burrito shits.
I understand Chinese rice is fertilized with human shit.
I understand
Chineserice is fertilized with human shit.damnit, the italics were supposed to be a strikethrough. I hate rice.
How can one hate rice? It’s like saying they hate the flavor of water.
I don’t get it either.
And jasmine rice at least actually has a nice flavor.
But rice does have a flavor (which isn’t good), and it’s just wasted space in my stomach.
I think we need a ruling from UCS on this.
It’s not keto friendly. 🙁
Anyone here that doesn’t have a place to go tomorrow, just know that I’ll be in the comment section providing emotional support to those who need it. You are not alone. Everybody has value in the eyes of me. I’ll help build your self esteem and then, when you’ve stepped back from the ledge, I’ll give you a nice little nudge back on it. I mean, c’mon, I still want entertainment.
Just in time for Black Friday, get it before it’s banned!
Right now it’s all still up, because I replaced all the MAGA Prime’s with a knock-off.
The heart shaped choker is classy. Maybe a Christmas gift for my bro.
Lots to choose from, Hat and Hair, MAGA Prime (knockoff) and Warty Hugeman!
I love the coffee mug with the H&H. Between that and the glib mug, they’ll be great conversation starters with my coworkers.
This is the one to impress all the ladies you bring home.
That’ll definitely knock out all the local obaa-sans.
I’ll be here. Or rather in a hole in the ground working. And ‘here’ as well.
Wherever 3 gather in his name…bukkake?
In a hole. So you’ll be… *dons sunglasses* …Threedoor down?
Hahaha. Beautiful. No I’m literally in a hole. Working in a quarry. Signal sucks here because of the hole.
I should be around up until around late morning. Most of that time will be roasting the turkey, and that only requires me to look at it about every half hour.
So, what now, CDC? I guess I just have to drink my Caesar dressing right out of the bottle, like some animal?
It works as lube in a pinch. I’ve heard.
Replace the lettuce with fried chicken. It’s much more satisfying.
If you can score some Cardini’s caesar? Not only is it carb-free, but worthy of chugging out of the bottle.
Works for me. Caesar dressing is delicious.
Use a glass FFS.
Im about to throw together a chocolate cake, if anyone wants in on this
Frosted with Chocolate Thunder?
Straight from the Hershey highway!
As long as they don’t take my cabbage away.
I didn’t know you were a carnie.
“One of us! One of us!”
This clown is the gift that keeps on giving.
Well, until he gets out of jail. Then he’s totally a banger again.
Prison changes a man.
I meant in a couple days, assuming he’s innocent. (He has some sort of career to promote, after all.)
But if not, well… yeah.
Article said he’s in lockup right now, so I figured I’d use the only good line from that Zorro sequel.
If he’s in lockup and hasn’t gotten stabbed, he’s probably not pretending to be a banger.
WORST Immigration Arguments of ALL TIME
She’s a totally indoctrinated moron, but she’s hawt, imho. Can’t decide which side of the crazy/hot scale she falls on, so I won’t cast that judgement. (but, for the sake of that argument, I’ll defer towards WOOD).
Her intellectual sloth and cool aid stained looks takes her down to about a 6. I “wood” only as a hate fuck. With prejudice + power.
Cool aid stained *lips*….I blame the stupid I caught fromisten ng to her talk.
Sorry, feeling grumpy tonight. This intersectional bullshit is just plain evil. It is designed to A) punish and marginalize white people ( particularly men) and/or B) breath life back into real racism so we can see a resurgence of shit like the KKK again. Either way, people will suffer because these deluded narcisicsts won’t be happy until we have a race war.
I didn’t even know cool aid was a ‘black’ thing until my black friends in college started talking about it. I was raised on cool aid. It’s just a poor thing.
#metoo
#ohyeah ?
LUXURY!
Them days all we had was cold Flavoraid.
We had to drink our Flavorade without water.
I’ve tried that once… do not recommend.
We had water (warm) but it was used…secondhand
I’m with you. I’m just plain SICK of hearing debate and deliberation about whether or not there are “enough” minorities, women, or trannies in this occupation or that occupation.
A relative (also of Asian descent) sent me a link to this “Crazy Rich Asians” movie, and they were telling me about how it’s the first American movie with an all-Asian cast and how there are no speaking roles for non-Asians… And they were mentioning this as though it were some great news for me, as though this movie has improved my life somehow.
I know that in general, things are getting better (crime, poverty, technological advances, etc) but sometimes I think we’re on a simultaneous backslide on ethno-cultural matters.
Awkwafina has improved all of our lives, bro.
Um, what counts as an ‘American movie’? I mean, Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon was a co-production of American and asian companies 18 years ago. And isn’t it silly of me that I dreamed of making a movie with a multi-cultural cast (including american indians, which are hugely under represented in films still when a character is supposed to be indian) where that was not ever brought up in the plot, just these characters who happen to look different, 20 years ago. How racist of me, we can’t have people of different races represented without pointing out what race they are, otherwise that would be racist!
I loved that movie.
We need more wuxia over here in general. I’d love to see a good adaption of Jin Yong’s work. Hell, I’d just love to see some official translations of his novels!
I guess they never saw “The Flower Drum Song.”
I have some black friends on my facebook that (when I used it more often) posted all these ‘this is how black people do X’ memes, I made sure to point out that no, that’s how poor people do things, myself being poor.
White people can’t be poor because something, something, structural privledge.
Definitely would. She doesn’t get my phone number and I’m dressed and out of there as soon as possible.
I just want to know why people get so worked up about something that is either misdemeanor or a mere civil penalty, depending on what exactly is being referred to.
To what referring of referring of being referred to are you referring to?
Illegal immigration, which consists of either the misdemeanor of “improper entry” or the civil fine of “unlawful presence”. Particularly, in the case of unlawful presence, it’s like frothing at the mouth over someone parking illegally.
I should add that unlawful presence wasn’t even an infraction before 1997.
Funny how this one part of political culture can make a film like The Coneheads still relevant. As an adherent to my own Constitutional Property Rights Minarchy philosophy, having immigration and naturalization in the constitution means until it’s amended we should adhere to it, but that’s far down my list of constitutional infractions.
I know that naturalization is an enumerated power of FedGov in the Constitution, but where is mention of immigration – except, perhaps in the 10th as a power reserved to the individual States or the people?
FUCK YOU! (I’m drunk and therefore not in proper mind to discuss this, love you big butt banger)
I should get drunk.
That woman shouldn’t keep her kids under her skirt, that’t child abuse.
For me it’s all the other illegal and immoral things that come along with it. Identity theft, tax evasion, welfare fraud, anchor babies, theft of services…
Irish car bomb is an incredibly insensitive name for a drink according to these thin-skinned inbred tourists from England. Apparently it’s analogous to if they were to order a drink called a 9/11. Which got me to thinking what would be in a 9/11? Liquor’s prohibited in Muslim cultures so that doesn’t help. I was thinking part-Manhattan but then what? Fermented goat’s milk? I’ll be damned if another country whose star has waned is going to create this drink.
A Manhattan with a with a shot of Aviation Gin dropped in?
And replace the vermouth with Aftershock.
Is Aftershock that peppermint drink in the volcano bottle? Fond memories.
Cinnamon drink with the sugar crystals in the bottom.
Yep, that’s the one. And doesn’t it have a diametrically opposed relation in a blue bottle?
Are you talking about Goldschlager?
Not sure. I only remember the red cinnamon flavor one. And having it sit in the back of the cupboard for 20 years until I finally tossed it down the drain.
Nope. There was also a “cool” Aftershock in a blue bottle.
Who could confuse Goldschlagger with anything else. I mean it has REAL GOLD flakes that cut your stomach lining so the alcohol gets into your bloodstream quicker. (actually heard)
I have a large bottle of Jäger that has that as its future in another 15 years or so. To this day I don’t know why the fuck I bought it – I hate it.
Cough medicine is cheaper if one really likes the flavor.
Give it to one of the bums on your way to the grocery store.
I just realized you live in Brooklyn, iirc, so probably don’t see that many bums actually. Give it to the next Russian you see?
Huh. Apparently Jack + Jaeger + SoCo is a 9/11 because “it can bring you down with only a couple”. Who knew.
Jaeger, it’s so cute when people think that’s something strong.
It is basically strong cough syrup.
SoCo is still being consumed by people?
Contrary to Raston above, SoCo is what my friends and I called ‘Grampa’s Cough Syrup’ Jeager was just black licorice in a bottle. These days gin is about the only spirit my stomach can handle.
Jaeger was the shot to do with the girls when I was out clubbing and drinking, because “they could handle it”. I knew one person who drank SoCo, and he hated every other liquor there was. It became a running joke in our circle of friends.
And if you hate the flavor of anise, stay away from Aviation Gin (named ingredient in a classic cocktail).
Speaking of anise, my Persian acquaintance used to order Sambuca shots. I’m leaning toward that in the revamped 9/11.
Where does Tanqueray fall on the anise scale? That’s my favorite gin, although I don’t think I’ve had it in almost a decade because it’s too expensive.
The standard Tanqueray? Far more citrus than anise. Although I prefer the Tanqueray expressions (Malacca is my favorite, with Rangpur being a close second, and the 10 is there as well). Back in the day, it was just a call pour at most places bars.
Wow, you are high maintenance on all fronts.
I would take offense, but I maintain myself.
If I have a bad habit, I try to do it well.
My wife didn’t touch anything distilled for about six years after drinking soco
All this talk about spirits makes me glad I stopped drinking them. So many bad decisions.
A 9/11? I’d go with cinnamon liquor (fire), vodka (distillation was a middle Eastern invention). If I wanted to be a monster, I’d aid Bailey’s and Lime Juice (concrete).
As for the Car Bomb, there was one local Irish Pub that was staffed by expat Micks. I was there one time two drunk whitecaps (assholes) decided to argue and order an Irish Car Bomb from an Irish bartender. After being told to fuck off once, they persisted. The bartender made the drinks, and set them down in front of the bastards. They grabbed them and shot them down, at which point the bartender said, “That’ll be $60”. He charged them for a full pour of every liquor (and beer) in the drink. To be fair to the whitecaps, they paid for that drink and moved on.
Sounds more like a “Truther” but I like where your mind is at.
That’ll be $40.
Same as downtown.
Some dingus I used to work with had a severe lack of intercultural competence (he mixed up China and Japan once, and when I corrected him, he said “aren’t they basically the same country??”)
Anyway, he was talking about going to Ireland and mentioned how cool it would be to be in a real Irish pub and order an Irish car bomb. I told him that it probably wasn’t a good idea to order that, but he just didn’t get it. I wasted a good few minutes trying to explain to him that the average Irish person might not find it funny.
I met an Irish guy once at a Halloween party when I was dressed as gorilla, he was depressing as fuck. Now I hate all micks!
Well fuck off you cunt!
Never mind, up for a pint?
Was it your own gorilla suit, or did you borrow it from a friend?
It looks like I forgot to do something. Probably the final ”
Anyway, https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/guise-and-dolls/
+Nanking
I’m hard pressed to think of an English-Irish equivalent event. The Scots sure, but not the Irish.
Besides the Famine??
I did not know the English caused the famine.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Great_Famine_(Ireland)#Genocide_question
There seemed to be plenty of alcohol in Iraq when I was there. I saw one bar when we were out. But Iraq isn’t Saudi.
Good point. So the 9/11 should have a touch of House of Saud. What do Yemenis hate?
You know who else hated the same thing?
Real reason Ghosn was arrested
So he was not a soy boy I see.
Good morning glibs. How is everyone? I just got done with drinking my coffee and doing my “just got to work” stuff.
For some reason I do not instinctively know what hour is in USistan… And my first post shows 11 50 pm… Hmmm … Then I remember not all of you are on the same hour and am never sure which hour the site is. I assume Chicago standard time.
I’m on the same time as Chicago, so #metoo BUY SOME STUFF!
That site does not ship to Romania. I feel discriminated
In the one true ‘Merican time, it’s currently 01:00.
so you’re a time traveler? Because in America’s Heartland it’s on only 12:10.
Everytime I’ve met a European here in ‘Merica I’ve tried to explain our immense scale. When I put it in measurable units they finally get it without getting it. Wisconsin is the size of Germany, and Wisconsin is one of the smaller states the farther west you go. And all are controlled by one government, when I put it in terms of how far away Wisconsin is from DC and how far away their country’s capital is that’s when they finally gain some perspective.
I love it when euros tell me I need to travel to other countries to get a better, more rounded perspective. You can find such diversity (more than in Europe) simply by driving across the us.
Some of are fortunate enough to be on Pacific time. The real American time zone.
Besides Hawaii’s timezone, I can’t think of a less American timezone.
Speaking of funny time, I have a pending post that was last modified on 26 November. I call shenanigans.
We are roasting two turkeys for Thanksgiving. Both are 16 pounds. Wife went to Butterball site for cooking instructions. 4 hours later she tells me to carve them. Both are still pink inside.
I do a Google search to find out they should cook for another hour and twenty minutes and the temperature should be 25 degrees higher. Back in the roaster they go. Should be interesting to see how they turn out.
Wait is it thanksgiving today or was it yesterday?
For you, today.
Currently 11pm in California. Tomorrow is Thanksgiving.
You’re telling us you cook your turkeys the night before? WTF?
Californians are weird.
Happy thanksgiving
That is not inclusive of people who are unhappy.
Do you lot get a day off work today?
Yes. I work retail so this and Christmas are the only days I get off.
Almost everyone would get today off
Hospitals, gas stations etc being the larger exceptions.
I work retail – shoe salesman?
I work at Home Depot. I don’t know if your familiar with them. I’m not sure how big they are outside the US but they are basically the Walmart of hardware stores. I work in the lawn and garden department. Mostly working with Christmas stuff since late September.
Can you recommend a good flamethrower that ships to Romania?
I wish. our customers are a bit less Bond villain and more confused little old lady.
I’m (happily) surprised you actually get those days off. I see way to many stores open on holidays.
Wait you can’t just come here at this hour and answer old comments
Well, it is too late for you to stop me.
*cackles manically*
I will have the old witch woman down the street hex you if you keep that up
I am too. Other than gas stations I don’t know why places should be open on big holidays.
What are the bigger holidays you have that we don’t celebrate?
Like no work days? Ehm…
various national holidays – 24 January (wallachia and moldova unified) and 1 December (transylvania joins the group)
1st of may (commie labor day)
1st of June (children’s day)
30 november (St Andres)
15th August death of the Virgin Mary
Besides that we have Easter and Pentecost, 25 26 December, 1 2 January
15th August death of the Virgin Mary
Wut?
What confuses you? In orthodox religion the I think english used word Dormition is a significant holly day and it is a public holiday in Romania.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dormition_of_the_Mother_of_God
I knew Romania was an Orthodox country, I was just unaware celebrating the death of virgin mary was a thing. One would think celebrating the day she got knocked up would make more sense.
Wikipedia again (I did not know all of them myself)
The Twelve Great Feasts are as follows (note that the liturgical year begins with the month of September):
The Nativity of the Theotokos, 8 September
The Exaltation of the Cross, 14 September
The Presentation of the Theotokos, 21 November
The Nativity of Christ/Christmas, 25 December
The Baptism of Christ — Theophany, also called Epiphany, 6 January
The Presentation of Jesus at the Temple, 2 February
The Annunciation, 25 March
The Sunday before Pascha (Easter) — the Entry into Jerusalem or Flowery/Willow/Palm Sunday
Forty Days after Pascha (Easter) — the Ascension of Christ
Fifty Days after Pascha (Easter) — Pentecost
The Transfiguration, 6 August
The Dormition (Falling Asleep) of the Theotokos, 15 August
… is this for Christmas? I always thought Romanians were Orthodox (mainly).
Yes it is and yes we are. But the Romanian Orthodox Church goes by the Gregorian calendar. Russians for example have a different calendar.
Good stuff. The only Orthodox (besides Catholic Orthodox) I’ve met IRL have used a different calendar and celebrate sometime in January, iirc.
There is a lot of autocephaly in orthodox churces and each can differ. Russians, as usual, are wrong.
Indeed, it is hard to keep things straight because they’re all different. Not as bad as protestants (who range form being avowed atheist preachers to handling snakes and talking in ‘tongues’ like psychos).
I always wonder what all these types do in the US. There is only one orthodox church in about a 10 mile radius of where I am, I’m guessing a lot of different types all go to the same church.
Well-done, Switzy. Thank you.