“I told the brethren that the Book of Mormon was the most correct of any book on earth, and the keystone of our religion, and a man would get nearer to God by abiding by its precepts, than by any other book”[ii]
Joseph Smith, Jr.
The previous article discussed Joseph Smith and the translation of The Book of Mormon. This article discusses the book itself.
So, what is The Book of Mormon? To start with, the full title of the book is The Book of Mormon Another Testament of Jesus Christ. The book is a volume of scripture similar to the Bible. Like the Bible it is comprised of “books” – the writings of various prophets expressing the will of the Lord to people whose willingness to obey what the Lord said varied wildly.
If it’s just like the Bible, then why do we need it? It’s another witness of the divinity of Christ. In Paul’s second epistle to the Corinthians, he re-stated the Old Testament dictum that “in the mouth of two or three witnesses shall every word be established.”[iii] We have had the Bible and now we have the Book of Mormon which both bear witness of the divinity of Christ.
The Book of Mormon teaches of Christ on nearly every page. As Nephi, the first prophet of the Book of Mormon, states “And we talk of Christ, we rejoice in Christ, we preach of Christ, we prophesy of Christ, and we write according to our prophecies, that our children may know to what source they may look for a remission of their sins.”[iv]
The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints sees the Book of Mormon as the fulfillment of prophecy. It is Isaiah’s “voice from the dust”,[v] and “sealed book”[vi] (see the story of Martin Harris’ encounter with Dr. Charles Anton in the previous article), and the stick of Joseph referenced by Ezekiel.[vii]
The importance of the Book of Mormon to the Church cannot be overstated. Joseph Smith’s description of the book as the “keystone of our religion” is apt. Like the arch a keystone supports, the Church would crumble without it. If the Book of Mormon is not the word of God, then Joseph Smith was a master con-man whose fraud continues to this day, and all the millions of people who have professed a belief in his teachings are either credulous dupes or cynical perpetuators of the fraud. If, on the other hand, the Book of Mormon is the word of God, then it was translated as Joseph Smith said it was, which means that Joseph Smith was a prophet, and the Church has a modern imprimatur from God.
The Book of Mormon is an abridgement of sacred writings generated over a thousand years by prophets living in the Americas. The records were selected, edited, and compiled mostly by the prophet Mormon (after whom the book is named). The project was completed by Mormon’s son Moroni (the same Moroni who gave them to Joseph Smith). After Moroni finished his father’s work, he added two things: The Book of Ether, which relates the story of the Jaredites (see below), and the Book of Moroni, which contains letters and sermons which Mormon gave to his son along with procedures for ordinances such as baptism and the administration of the sacrament.
The Book of Mormon was not created for the people it talks about. It was written for the people who lived in the time it was brought to light – our time. The prophet Mormon was compiling it as his nation was sliding towards oblivion. His enemies would have destroyed the writings if they had found them. His son Moroni added his contributions and buried the plates to preserve them, and there they remained for 1400 years, until he showed them to Joseph Smith.
So, what’s in the book? Wonderful things. The Book of Mormon relates the rise and fall of two civilizations on the American continent. The earlier civilization, known as the Jaredites, began as a number of family groups who came out from the confusion of tongues at the Tower of Babel under the guidance of a prophet known only as the brother of Jared. This prophet guided them to the sea shore where the Lord instructed them to build boats in which he would carry them over the sea to the land of promise. While the Jaredites were building the boats, the brother of Jared went to the Lord with two problems: because the boats were airtight, 1) it was dark and 2) the people in them would suffocate and die.[viii]
The Lord told them how to solve the problem of the air: Drill holes in the top and bottom of the boat, and stop them up. When the air gets foul, open which ever plug is on top. If water comes in, you’re underwater, plug it back up.[ix]
For light, the Lord told the brother of Jared to come back with a suggestion. They couldn’t have fire – they’d be going up and down on waves and diving beneath them – but he should come up with something.[x] The prophet melted sixteen clear, small, stones (two for each boat) out of a rock and brought them to the Lord, and asked him to touch them so that they would shine in the darkness.[xi] The Lord agreed, and when he reached out to touch the stones, “the veil was taken from off the eyes of the brother of Jared, and he saw the finger of the Lord; and it was as the finger of a man, like unto flesh and blood; and the brother of Jared fell down before the Lord, for he was struck with fear.”[xii] When the Lord asked him what had happened, the brother of Jared replied that he had seen the Lord’s finger, and was afraid he would be struck down “for I knew not that the Lord had flesh and blood”[xiii].
The Lord responded that faith had enabled the brother of Jared to see the finger, and the fact that he would eventually take on a mortal body. He then revealed his spirit body to the brother of Jared, and introduced himself as Jesus Christ.[xiv]
After this revelation, the brother of Jared took the lit stones down off the mountain and put them in the boats. After preparing stores for themselves and their flocks for the voyage, the Jaredites boarded the boats, and the Lord conveyed them across the ocean. The remainder of the Book of Ether reports a cycle of righteous and wicked kings among the Jaredites. They war and intrigue against each other until finally, in a last calamitous battle, the Jaredite nation destroys itself completely. The Book of Ether reports that the lone survivor was one of the kings, who had been warned by the prophet Ether that if he did not repent of his sins, he would live to see his lands taken over by another people.[xv] The Book of Mormon records the fulfillment of this prophecy in the Book of Omni.[xvi]
The other major civilization described by the Book of Mormon is the family of Lehi. Lehi was a prophet who lived near Jerusalem in 600 BC. Lehi warned the people of Jerusalem about the imminent Babylonian invasion. When the people tried to kill him, the Lord instructed Lehi to leave and take his family – comprised of his wife, Sariah, his sons Laman, Lemuel, Sam, and Nephi, and an unspecified number of daughters – out of the city. 1 Nephi, the first book in the Book of Mormon, is the story of their travels in the wilderness until they came to the seashore, where they built a boat, and were guided by the Lord to the Americas.
The story is punctuated by tension between the brothers. The older brothers (Laman and Lemuel) were quite happy with their civilized lifestyle, and didn’t actually believe their fathers teachings. Bailing out of the city at a moment’s notice, based on a dream their father had was not part of their plan. The younger brothers (Sam and Nephi) believed their father and obeyed his commands without complaining.
One example of this division is an event which took place in 1 Nephi 3. The Lord commanded Lehi to send his sons back to Jerusalem (several days journey from where they were) to obtain plates which contained the scriptures and other records they would need to preserve their civilization once they arrived at the promised land. These plates were in the keeping of Laban – a powerful member of the ruling class in Jerusalem.
From the beginning of the journey back, Laman and Lemuel complained about the orders and their father. When the plan ran into difficulties, they took it out physically on their younger brothers.[xvii]
Eventually, the plates were obtained by Nephi who found Laban drunk in the street, killed him after a fair amount of soul searching, and assumed his identity to trick Laban’s staff into giving him the plates.[xviii]
Once the family reaches the Americas, the split grows wider. Once Lehi dies, the family splits into the two factions by which they are known for the rest of the Book of Mormon: the Nephites and the Lamanites. The Book of Mormon is told from the point of view of the Nephites who followed the same cycle of righteousness followed by wickedness we saw in the Book of Ether.
The highlight of the Book of Mormon takes place in 3 Nephi. At the death of Christ, the Nephites and Lamanites are wracked by a series of natural disasters followed by three days of impenetrable darkness.[xix] At the end of these three days, the resurrected Christ appears and ministers to them.[xx] He preaches the Sermon on the Mount, blesses them, heals their sick, and ministers to their children. While he was among them, he chose twelve especially righteous men as disciples to run the church, and gave them their choice of a reward. All but three of them chose to be reunited with him once they had lived out a normal lifespan. Those three made the same choice as John the Beloved and chose to remain on the earth as ministers until Christ’s millennial return.[xxi]
After the departure of Christ, the inhabitants of the new world lived in peace for 200 years. There were no divisions among them, “nor any manner of
-ites.”[xxii] After the 200 years were done, people began to abandon the teachings of Christ, and things began to go downhill. One group who left the church called themselves the Lamanites, and the old divisions began again. By about AD 320 the entire civilization was sliding over the edge into apostasy and wickedness.
The prophet Mormon, who compiled the Book of Mormon, narrates the end of the Nephite nation. His writings form an internal Book of Mormon. The people had grown so wicked that they would not listen when he tried to teach them, and, at one point, the Lord forbade him to try because they had willfully rebelled against God.[xxiii] Mormon’s writings tear at the heart, because you watch this man of God desperately trying to save his people. A people so far gone into wickedness and nihilism that they weren’t interested in survival, much less salvation.
The final battle took place at a location called Cumorah in about AD 384. Mormon lists by name 11 commanders of 10,000 who fell along with their commands – wiped out to a man – along with his 10,000 and those of his son Moroni. He also states that “there were ten more who did fall by the sword, with their ten-thousand each[.]”[xxiv] There is no count of the Lamanite casualties, but of the nearly a quarter million Nephites who marched to that final battle, 24 escaped alive.
After the death of Mormon, Moroni completes the project of compiling the plates, adds the Book of Ether and his own writings, and buries them. This was completed in about AD 420.
That’s the bare plot, but it doesn’t do justice to what the book is. Intertwined with the narrative are the teachings of Christ. The book discusses faith, moral agency, the fall of Adam, the atonement of Christ, and many other principles – sometimes putting them in terms clearer than what the Bible describes.
So, what is the Book of Mormon? To the believers, it is another testament of Jesus Christ. It contains His gospel, and His promises to our day. It is also a warning – that God will not always strive with man. Sometimes, when we are sufficiently unwilling to listen his voice, he withdraws and leaves us to the natural consequences of our actions.
[i] Photo credit: www.lds.org
[ii] History of the Church 4:461
[xx] 3 Nephi 11 – 26
I have removed the “Mormons in the Mist” title because the Prophet has asked that we not use the term “Mormons” to refer to members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
Why couldn’t it have been 50 Shades of Grey instead of this fraud of a book?
Because Solomon already wrote that one.
I thought that was 50 Shades of Gazelle browsing among lilies?
Wait, I thought you couldn’t say Mormon now.
I think I”ll be forgiven for using the title of the book, and the name of the prophet who compiled it. 😉
Did the sealed boats have toilets?
Since they didn’t report mass die-offs, I’d guess that they had some form of sanitary facility, but they don’t talk about it.
And so it came to pass…
*Pokes thread”
Sorry, I can’t take anything in this thread seriously. “it [the Book of Mormon] is comprised of ‘books.’ ” How can a book be comprised of book? To me, that is preposterous. Crab rangoon, things of that nature.
*hides the Lord of the Rings from Leap*
Well, it’s like Christians who worship three gods but insist that it’s just one. Of course, being one of (((those people))), I cannot grasp the subtlety of the theological argument.
Too stiffnecked.
To me, that is preposterous. Crab rangoon, things of that nature.
Now you have gone too far!
Crab rangoon is not kosher.
Aren’t they usually imitation crab*? Still delicious.
*Imitation crab is garbage, but I am willing to eat it when it is smothered in cream cheese and deep fried.
Its a cultural reference.
How would you describe it? As with the Bible, each prophet wrote his revelations and experiences in their own book. Mormon compiled those writings into the Book of Mormon. Thus the Book of Mormon is comprised of all of those books written by the individual prophets.
*pokes back*
So, a question for you… what’s your opinion on some of the Christian churches that claim LDS (since you aren’t supposed to be Mormons anymore, is this the correct appellation) and Catholics don’t count as Christian? For what it’s worth, I was raised Catholic, and was devout in my younger years. I always just considered them mistaken and ill-informed.
only orthodox count as Christians
…which Orthodox? I know some Greek Orthodox that might have a strong feeling on that.
Ask a certain Knight of Malta.
..Oh, I think I will pass on that.
*quietly slips out of room and runs away*
Just be sure to remind those protestants that their religion is founded in heresy.
Meh. Now as an agnostic, I don’t have to care. It just seemed strange to me that it was always the LDS followers and the Catholics who were singled out as not Christian. Not the snake handlers, or the Jehovah’s Witnesses, or the mega church televangelists, or etc… etc..
As a retired catholic (atheist), that is a comment I occasionally use when aggressive protestants won’t leave me alone. Otherwise, I don’t care either way.
Let me ask an analogous question: are Christians actually Jewish because they believe in Yahweh and the divine origin of the Torah? Or are they not because they’ve slapped another theology and set of laws on top of Judaism?
A similar question is whether Allah, YHWH, and the triune Christian God are the same God.
Ask a Baha’i.
Saw the Lotus temple in Delhi when I was there last year. That is one cool building. Beyond that, I know nothing about Baha’i.
The Quran makes it quite clear they are the same entity.
But it’s kind of hard to trust the ramblings of a man whose last words were “Murder all of (((them))).”
Because ((((they))) perverted His Word by creating a shit ton of complex rules obscuring the central tenant of simply worshipping the One God. Then the Christians screwed things up by deifying Jesus who, while a big deal prophet was just a man (as was Mohammed).
Well they did made fun of and insulted him when he was trying to create a new religion.
https://jewsforjesus.org
This is edgy you should never inherent from a G-d class, you’ll never get clean code after a refactor.
I’ve always considered the concept of the Trinity (central in Christianity) to be mutually exclusive with the (((Oneness of G-d))). That’s where I personally think Christianity departs most starkly from Judaism. Getting the identity of the Messiah “wrong” is one thing, but building a separate metaphysics on top of that is a larger departure IMO.
I’d say close, but not analogous, as one of the standard lines from those Christian churches (Jack Chick style Christian) was that you just had to accept Christ and his teaching in order to be Christians. By that definition, Catholics and LDS would be Christians. But then those same churches would claim that the Catholics secretly worshiped the Pope, Mary, and the Saints over Christ, and went into crazy rants about the LDS.
But I would say that as an outsider looking into Judaism, I would say that to be of the Jewish faith, you would have had to accept the covenant set forth in the Torah. Most of my exposure to Judaism is Ashkenazi reform Jews, while there are some Orthodox in some pockets here in Cleveland, they tend to keep to themselves (I worked with one for a couple of months on a help desk, really nice guy, but work is not the place for in depth conversations about religion).
Probably not, but this is not a question I feel the need to resolve.
This was an argument in the early church and was covered in the book of Acts.
Some argued that to for a gentile to be Christian they first had to convert to Judaism. That got smacked down hard.
Ask the members of Jews for Jesus….
As a protestant, I’ve never understood the arguments against counting catholics as Christians. To me, there’s a huge gap between “very, very wrong” and “no longer Christian”. Same applies to Mormonism, but I don’t understand their beliefs well enough to determine which side of the line I think they’re on.
The answer is dependent on your definition of Christian. If you define it as accepting Peter’s declaration that “for there is none other name under heaven given among men, whereby we must be saved” (Acts 4:12), we qualify. If you define it as accepting the Apostles Creed or the Nicean Creed, we don’t.
My personal definition is that anyone who feels themselves part of the New Covenant, is. My understanding is that LDS sees itself as a part of that New Covenant.
I would agree with this definition.
Source.
I wasn’t aware of this line of thinking. Stands to reason that there would be no true Scotsman arguments amongst the various flavors of Christianity, but I escaped exposure to it until now. Thanks, Neph. You prick.
You gotta draw a line somewhere, because “Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven, but only he who does the will of my Father who is in heaven. Many will say to me on that day, ‘Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name, and in your name drive out demons and perform many miracles?’ Then I will tell them plainly, ‘I never knew you. Away from me, you evildoers!'” (Matthew 8)
Meh, seems like the man upstairs needs to draw the line, not me. As someone that lacks faith, the various expressions of it aren’t terribly important to me.
Meh, seems like the man upstairs needs to draw the line, not me.
As someone of faith, I feel very, very strongly that this is the way that we should consider others faith. Maybe right, maybe wrong, but not something we have authority to decide for them.
This. I may have misspoke if I gave the impression that I was the one drawing the line.
No worries trashy, I read it that way, I was just offering my interpretation.
The first time I encountered it in the wild was long before the internet, when I had a paper route if memory serves (so around 5th grade). I was collecting for the paper route, and one of the people asked me if I had accepted Christ into my life. I said yes, I went to church and was an altar boy. I was then told that I wasn’t Christian. I may have stammered out a, “Huh? What do you mean?”
And seriously? You never saw that the smaller the differences, the bigger the infighting before? Fuck, there’s a great joke about it.
There is a similar joke floating around using libertarian subgeneres. It is a good joke.
You underestimate my apathy. I’m great at tuning out things that hold little interest to me. I’ve almost certainly been exposed to it, but it never made an impression. Most of the inter-Christian arguments I’ve actually paid attention to have been about disagreements on how certain things are done, not about whether a certain group is or is not Christian.
I’m going back into that bubble, it’s nicer there.
I haven’t been to mass in more than 40 years. And yet, this triggers an instantaneous “fuck you, you heretic” response in my head.
Technically true. I go into this in more detail in an upcoming article, but when Michael and his angels kicked the devil and his followers out of heaven, that was a family fight of immense proportions. I’d also ask the author of that quote how that precludes “our” Jesus from being the same Jesus who died for our sins? He has no black sheep in his family?
My in-laws, the model of Christian charity, told my then-fiance and I that I was condemning their little girl to hell, since I was brought up Catholic and not really Christian. We will keep you posted as events develop.
Is…… is there internet in hell?
There sure is Hell in the internet…
Yes, and the only data it transmits is celebrity news.
I was raised Catholic too, so i’m kinda biased. But i don’t see how anyone could say that Catholics aren’t christian, when they can trace the history of their religion and their bishops pretty much all the way back to JC himself
I don’t remember all the details now, but some of the really narrow sects who preach the Catholic church is not Christian, argue that there was always an underground, true faith, persecuted minority that kept real Christianity alive. As I recall, there are some Baptist groups that claim a lineage that predates Luther.
As I recall, there are some Baptist groups that claim a lineage that predates Luther.
There were a few precursors to Luther, such as the goose (Jan huss). Also, at the time of the reformation, there was a strong anabaptist movement in areas like Switzerland.
From Wikipedia on the origins of anabaptism:
Medieval antecedents may include the Brethren of the Common Life, the Hussites, Dutch Sacramentists,[12][13] and some forms of monasticism.
The most horrifying anecdote from the reformation was the rule that “those who dip (adult baptism) shall be dipped (drowned for heresy)”
Luther?!
*scowls, looks over at picture of Zwingli*
I don’t take seriously anyone who adds on the “and Catholics” part.
I am ecumenical in nature, but personally put Jehovah’s Witnesses, Christian Scientists, and LDS outside the big tent. If I am wrong, cool, good for them.
Trinitarianism is a core tenet of Christianity. Theologies begin to crumble without the foundation of trinitarianism.
Ask the UU about that.
Oh, wait.
I’m curious, what part of our theology pushes us out of the tent?
Probably the origin of the Christ, for one.
I read the article, I just don’t have anything worthwhile to add.
..and when has that stopped ANYONE on this site from commenting?!?!?!?!?!
Okay, um… look at dees boobie pics!
https://goo.gl/images/ATf81n
I’ll be in my bunk.
OT: I watched Chappaquiddick last night. It was pretty good. I don’t think it was terribly harsh on Teddy, but it did show him as cold and calculating (if also inept) after the incident. I remain surprised that it got made, given that it portrays a Democrat in a poor light.
The Kennedys no longer have the influence they used to; in fact they (JFK in particular) represent a “moderate” strain of Democrat that party leadership would prefer go extinct (I realize that Teddy Boy was not really a moderate, but they are not the great socialist hope, so they’re fair game for unpersoning).
” they’re fair game for unpersoning”
yeah. this general trend of “The past is all tainted: we must burn all our history and start anew as enlightened progressives” is increasingly common
Welcome to Year Zero!
Frankie Avalon says hi
Pretty underrated film. Ray Milland gives a good performance.
I have removed the “Mormons in the Mist” title because the Prophet has asked that we not use the term “Mormons” to refer to members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
I gather that the rebranding was stated ex cathedra?
*narrows gaze*
True story: I had the then-director of the Mormon Tabernacle Choir as one of my chemistry students back in the day. He was a very intelligent man, super nice (in the way Mormons tend to be), and got me some great seats for their concerts.
You always pull that kind of stuff with music!
*stamps foot*
Heh, ask SP about her LA days, hanging out with Leo Kottke. I can’t top that. Well, except the time Dizzy Gillespie tried to pick up one of the two girls I was having dinner with before his show (“Looks like you have an extra.”).
Your reply:
“It takes two to handle me.”
“Mind if we dance with your dates?”
Heh, Dizzy was a sweet old guy with an enormous smile and tons of charm. He got the phone number of one of them despite being, oh, 40 years her senior.
Everyone knows it takes two to make a thing go right.
Yes. The link in the note goes to a talk President Nelson gave over the weekend at the semi-annual General Conference of the Church. That’s about as ex cathedra as it gets.
Thanks. Insert “deadname” joke here.
We’re missing the most important question of all: why are LDS women so damn hot?
(Thanks for the series Gad, my understanding of Mormonism was pretty cartoonish before these articles; I enjoy learning about people’s belief systems)
To trick you into converting.
Nope, that was the Children of God.
why are
LDS womenwhite chicks so damn hot?Racist.
https://i.pinimg.com/originals/a2/c6/0d/a2c60d5bc181515a6c274262b51ecaeb.jpg
*weeps softly*
Clean living. 😀
So, what is the Book of Mormon?
Source material for the musings of the South Park creators? //IkeeIkeed
Speaking of South Park, this season has been awesome so far. Extra offensive and extra funny. I also am thoroughly enjoying Last Man Standing. I did not dislike the new Mandy as I thought I would. She has the character down as far as speaking and mannerisms.
Eh, the second episode of SP seemed kind of flat. I enjoyed everyone going to church to heckle the priest, but there wasn’t much else to the episode.
I liked the end. Nobody learned a damn thing.
Not entirely true. Father Maxi did. I loved that he blamed himself for not doing more even after he destroyed the Vatican 14 years ago.
SP is most assuredly not flat.
SP confirmed for OMWC sock.
What happened to Commodious? Oh, he got nuked.
Oh, an answer to you your question re: random (presumably unlabelled) billet:
Yes, you will need to heat-treat it after shaping.
Unless you’re performing stock removal via a process so tedious that not even you will consider worthwhile, you’re going to overheat it. And that’s assuming it’s not currently fully annealed to make shaping easier.
I’ve found the billet. It’s a quarter inch thick. It’s going to need a lot of work regardless.
Hawt.
Can confirm.
…Just like Stan’s mom.
LOL
OT: I decided to take the initiative and create the patriarchy meme discussed in the morning links.
It’s also hiding her vagina due to her shame at having one.
PATRIARXY
To Twitter! Go, man go!
Never go full mango.
Never go full Mandingo.
Full mangina.
Steven Soygal.
That’s up there with Cuck Norris. Well done.
I don’t have a twatter. Somebody else will have to twat about twats for me.
For whatever reason, I’ve always liked “twat” as a dysphemism for vagina/vulva and not even in the insulting and/or humorous sense. It’s nicely onomatopoeic; kind of like “fuck”.
“Keep your legs together! This isn’t Jamaica!”
How do you reconcile the lack of any archaeological evidence of a Semitic civilization in the Americas? I mean, the Aztecs and the Mayans and the whatnots do they even get mentioned in the Book of Mormon?
We don’t know precisely where it took place, so finding (for example) the ruins of the city of Zarahemla (the Nephite capital) is going to be difficult. “Somewhere in the American continent” is kind of vague. There is some research on the cultural aspects of the book. Most of it isn’t checkable, but the first book (First Nephi) names a place (Jerusalem and it’s environs) and a time (600 BC). The book — An Approach to the Book of Mormon by Hugh Nibley — details how the narrative in First Nephi dovetails with what we know about Middle Eastern culture at that time, including some things in the book which weren’t known until after Joseph Smith’s death.
Or the bone fields that would exist from a battle where over a quarter million people died before artillery could vaporize them.
Great article Gadianton. I don’t have any comments but have enjoyed reading both articles and expanding my knowledge about LDS.
I got about 30 pages in to the Book of Mormon and had to put it down it was so Fucking hilarious,
nice people though, and why does every one say that? I don’t trust nice people
Interesting take on how contemporary feminists are basically proving those opposed to women’s suffrage correct.
https://www.spiked-online.com/2018/10/08/hating-white-women/
This won’t end well for anyone. It can’t.
I don’t trust nice people
Seriously. What do they want from me? What are they hiding?
Seriously, nice people usually turn into Snakes, smiling all the time…..
Be nice, don’t LOOK nice
Ain’t that the undisputed truth?
*narrows gaze*
But your not smiling Ted…..
tl;dr is there any update on the “Why” of the sacred underwear? I have known many mormons, but this topic has been very hush hush.
unrelated: dumbest ‘mainstream journalist conventional-wisdom’ tweet I’ve seen lately.
Yeah nate, its crazy how they didn’t just shake off the ‘mobs of activists still blocking their doorsteps’ and the piles of death threats still coming into collins office, and offer big hugs to Corey and Kamala, who surely would have welcomed the generosity.
*in fact, Nate Silver remains one of the dumbest-motherfuckers in the pundit biz, imo. His whole, “unlike my peers, i am very good with numbers”-shtick amounts to often making wild, complex claims on the back of boring, meaningless headline-stats.
iow, he just trades on the idea that he’s some numbers-wizard who can tease great significance out of superficial polling-data. its pure charlatanism. 90% of the time he makes statements that don’t say anything at all, but somehow this is still treated as ‘a ha, the numbers guru has spoken’, rather than, ‘so what’
He’s a doosh who once got a C in intro stats.
Also, the whole “let’s be buddies with the Dems” has failed spectacularly for decades. Only when emboldened by Trump to start punching back did they start seeing success.
Did he really?
I don’t have my catalog in front of me, but…. I think I remember Into to Stat being just basic probability and combinatorics.
If he got a C, that’s dumb. It’s even dumber that he continued.
Metaphorically.
I know nothing about his personal history, I just think his stuff is remarkably simple minded and he uses some magic black-box model that he won’t let anyone see because he knows it’s unsophisticated. Of course most journopundits couldn’t pass College Algebra so the fact that he uses numbers at all looks like psychic sorcery.
So…. it’s your truth.
DON’T DENY MY LIVED EXPERIENCE.
Sounds like a credible accusation™ to me.
“he uses some magic black-box model that he won’t let anyone see”
this is my basic problem w/ political forecasting people.
they want credit for being ‘right’ when they call something correctly, and they want the credit attributed to their ‘models’.
but its possible they just guessed, and that their models are bullshit. but they collect lots of ‘consulting’ fees in the interim. the next time they make a call, and it goes wildly wrong, its not the model but some single piece of trivial data which they claim ‘threw it off’.
but you have no idea what weight that ‘trivial’ thing was given because you’ve never seen the model.
basically, if someone thinks they have a better system, they should publish it. if it turns out its a great model, they’ll get hired for their big-brain anyway: but if its bullshit, people will see why, and the methods of political handicapping will improve by seeing why models fail.
basically, they want all the credit but none of the risk. so i consider them charlatans from the get-go.
Lookit College here with his combinataurus and his grades. HEY, COLLEGE, THAT BIG HEAD OF YOURS GOOD FOR SOMETHING OTHER’N GABBING?
!
*sigh*
Make a good factorial joke and crickets.
Pearls before swine, I tell you.
http://images4.fanpop.com/image/photos/20700000/Math-Jokes-math-20787065-550-400.jpg
To quote Daniel Moynihan:
“‘You are entitled to your opinion. But you are not entitled to your own factorials.”
And I think you would do better with a fartorial joke here on Glibs.
Well, that, and adopting the whole “HANDS OFF MY MEDICARE!” shtick from the DNC wholesale.
Keep your government hands off my Social Security!
Here is the official write up on the temple garments. The short version is that they are worn by members who have gone through the temple as a reminder of the sacred promises we make there.
As opposed to the Dems, who to me seem like they are going after 4.7% of the country.
zing
but you actually make a good point which exposes some of Nate’s stupidity
No party NEEDS to go after “100%”. They need to go for 51% (more or less)
If they have a loyal, partisan, 25%, like GOP does (or Dems do), they’re not fighting over the remaining 75%; they’re fighting for a slim majority among independents.
its not necessary to appeal to “the other side”; and this is an argument the Dems/progressives make all the time. not everyone is ‘winnable’ so they shouldn’t try.
*its just that Dems have made this argument in extremely stupid ways: saying, “we don’t need working class white votes (anymore); we have immigrants and minorities and women etc”. But neither half of that is true.. 1) they already have lots of white working class votes: and they lose them with that kind of rhetoric; and 2) they don’t have any de-facto lock on minority groups; if anything, the absurdly high share they already have can only go in one direction in the future: down.
Untrue, the Communist party Always goes for 100% – even if they have to shoot any other candidates.
there’s also usually a fair amount of magnanimity and reaching out to the losing side
Traditionally, the losing side isn’t issuing death threats, threats of violence, and announcing their plans to stalk and harass the winners.
Just saw, BTW, that apparently the FBI took something like 1,400 anonymous complaints from people claiming Kavanaugh raped them. Assuming he started in high school and has continued at a steady pace every since, that’s around 37 rapes per year.
I suggest to the progfems that, if they don’t want to be treated like hysterical ninnies, they stop acting like hysterical ninnies.
You might want to have a bit more epistemological humility, Dean.
I mean, I’ve never seen Kavanaugh and STEVE SMITH in the same room. And we all know that STEVE SMITH was a lawyer. And if you squint a bit, it’s true that Kavanaugh has a “Squatch-y” shaped-head.
What’s wrong with just asking questions?
You might want to have a bit more epistemological humility, Dean.
And I might drive to work tomorrow in a Bugatti Veyron. I suspect both are equally likely.
Humility. Pshaw. *adjusts monocle, vigorously canes orphan*
But it’s a job interview. Granted one with accusations of a horrible crime.
Still not STEVE SMITH numbers but impressive for a human.
As noted above, this assumes facts not in evidence.
Just saw, BTW, that apparently the FBI took something like 1,400 anonymous complaints from people claiming Kavanaugh raped them. Assuming he started in high school and has continued at a steady pace every since, that’s around 37 rapes per year.
Wilt Chamberlain says Kavanaugh is a piker.
The football-spiking after Kavanaugh was confirmed this weekend was one such example. There’s always *some* of that after a big policy/electoral win, but there’s also usually a fair amount of magnanimity and reaching out to the losing side.
I don’t remember that after Obamacare was passed. “Elections have consequences”, dontcha know?
May I reiterate once again that we live in the best of all possible timelines.
https://www.breitbart.com/big-government/2018/10/07/stormy-daniels-sorry-for-mocking-donald-trumps-penis/
I still say it is possible she is working with Trump to troll everyone.
The world exists to give SugarFree material…
Man, he really is having a good week.
“Because in a way it’s body shaming.”
Oh, fuck off. Penises are funny and ugly.
The purple headed yogurt slinger!
Unlike vaginas, which are beautiful. Every single one.
On an unrelated note, what kind of sandwich should I get for lunch?
Fish.
Tuna Taco!
Can’t go wrong with spam.
Egg salad.
Is a taco a sandwich?
Well, crap.
This morning I resumed work on the kitbash for the article and noticed I’d lost one of the horses. After running around searching for the missing equine, I got annoyed and ordered another kit from the internet to get horses from.
And now I just found the horse.
Should I cancel the order, or let it show up and have more bitz?
the most certainest way to find something is the buy a new replacement.
Ship it to me, I’ll make use of it, complete or not….
/Model Whore Yusef
“complete or not”
Like a gelding?
I think the Germans used supply horses at Omaha Beach (at least according to The Longest Day).
Yes they did
The mane thing I’m wondering is; why have you shared this tail with us?
maybe he wasn’t Thorough?
The worst part is, I even hoofed it to the local game store before placing the order.
*narrows gaze*
*narrows gRaze*
Ah, but it’s a horse of a different color.
High school cheerleader distributed pot brownies in bid to win homecoming queen.
Jeez, Helen, reel it in a little bit.
Oh shit! It didn’t say these brownies had peanuts in them! Quarantine them and send in the bomb squad to dispose of them properly. The children must be protected from the evils of peanuts!
Blowjobs are more effective.
But only for half the voters!
Miniature American flags for others.
Brownies are faster and gender neutral, so you get to more voters.
I don’t need any details.
…it’s striking the degree to which the GOP governs as though it’s only interested in 47% of the country… instead of shooting for 51%
Sure, Nate.
“Can’t we all just get along? Why aren’t you willing to abandon your agenda and adopt mine?”
After all the reality has a liberal bias. /Proggie.
Should Florida Gibs be worried about Deep State Operators falling out of the sky?
Deputy Attorney General Rod Rosenstein will fly with President Donald Trump on Air Force One on Monday to a police chiefs’ conference in Florida.
I could end up eating my words soon, but here goes:
That sounds like good news for Rosenstein. If he were fired, he would have heard about it on twitter by now.
See, my first thought was “I guess you don’t need to be on a helicopter to take the proverbial helicopter ride”.
I saw he was Orlando when I went to the gym. Leave us alone!
https://youtu.be/0wG_h3U568w
You’re Orlando.
Orlando Bloom is most definitely *not* a Florida Man.
I don’t know, paddle boarding naked seems like something I’d do.
Yes, but there’d have to be booze and/or meth involved. Did Orlando do that?
He seems too health conscious for that.
Is Ruby Rod about to become Don’s lap dog?
Bzzzzzt!
Deputy Attorney General Rod Rosenstein will fly with President Donald Trump on Air Force One on Monday to a police chiefs’ conference in Florida.
It’s not a helicopter, but I guess it’ll do.
/jk
its pure charlatanism. 90% of the time he makes statements that don’t say anything at all, but somehow this is still treated as ‘a ha, the numbers guru has spoken’, rather than, ‘so what’
Media Barbie says, “Math is hard!” and dares not try to look behind the curtain.
ps- “charlatanism” is an excellent word choice.
https://freebeacon.com/culture/review-man-out-andrew-l-yarrow/
“Today, about 14 million working-age men are neither employed nor looking for work. Thirteen million men ages 18 to 34 still live with their parents[…]After decades of increase, male life expectancy actually fell in 2014.”
With you so far…
“Male membership in civic groups has fallen a half to two-thirds since the 1960s. Just half of men are husbands, compared with three-quarters a half-century ago.”
Ummm… why does this matter?
“Yarrow guesses there are about 20 to 25 million “men out,” compared with 120 million or so adult men in the population today. In that group he counts the out-of-labor-force, older men who have remained unmarried too long or divorced”
What’s “too long”?
“younger men who haven’t left home, fathers denied access to their children or who are absentee”
Soyboys and molesters.
“serial consumers of computer games and pornography”
NOW THEM’S FIGHTIN’ WORDS.
Now they’re after my Lucky Charms?
That’s a long list of factors. Not sure how you could obtain anything scientific from it.
computer games and pornography
That’s like half my weekend. Just add beer to it.
/tosses Rebel Scum a beer
Huh… let’s see. I’m an adult male, who’s employed and unmarried (with no children). So am I one of these serial consumers of games and porn? And didn’t they leave out beer and bourbon from the list?
Jesus Christ, Q! Learn to Conservative!
During the 1950’s a lot of men were part of the Rotary or the American Legion, and shit like that. So it was a good thing, like everything else that is associated with the childhood memories of the Boomers. This is why 1950’s were the best of all possible times.
So good in fact that they had to tear it down as system of oppression and conformity.
Don’t blame them, B’nai B’rith has problems with membership these days as well.
“We don’t need government to provide welfare, churches and private organizations can take care of that” and “what difference does it make if there are no more churches and private organizations”
The topic of the article isn’t the relationship between civic organizations and government, but of masculinity.
No one ever thinks that the role of the local Masonic Temple in providing a place for men to shoot the shit has been supplanted by virtual fora, like the lobby of an online game server or the comments section of a blog.
That was my first thought, but as a disembodied canine head I suppose I’m persona non grata.
Technically, as a canine head you’re not persona at all.
It was a macaronic pun, Ted.
There are people who want you:
There was also the role that fraternal organizations played as group health insurers previous to it being shifted to employers with a tax break.
This is true, which connects with Jus Sayin’s point. It’s also worth nothing that a lot of the group health insurer organization were ethnic ones, and as different groups assimilated into American culture, the importance of these groups faded, as did their membership.
I got that. It’s all related, though. The local Masonic temple (if we’re talking about the Anglo version and not the continental variety) provided social support to its members (life insurance, financial support in times of distress, and social events for families) and imparted liberal values (religious tolerance and the equality of persons) that isn’t provided through social media, generally speaking.
I’m not saying they didn’t do good things, but the wailing and gnashing of teeth by a certain tribe of Culture Warrior that the local Grange is suffering to find members is overwrought.
Creative destruction isn’t found in financial markets.
I’ve heard the complaints about the VFW, the Eagles, the Rotary, and the Knights of Columbus. In almost all of these instances, their recruitment problems started 30 some years ago. From my circle of friends I know one person who joined the Eagles (for cheap beer), and another who joined the K of C (he’s devoutly Catholic and wanted to do more for the community).
Insurance programs were founded as mutual societies. When the gold standard was killed by Nixon it went hand-in-hand with demutualization of insurance companies. If you can get insurance as a customer instead of being a member of a mutual society, you might prefer that.
Especially, as I’d been told, so many of those civic organizations were used as training grounds for future government office seekers.
(((Freemasons))) are too busy infiltrating positions of power and prepping for the New World Order to worry about masculinity. Such petty concerns are of no consequence to the pursuit of raw, orgasmic power.
Bowling hardest hit.
You just have to live in the right neighborhood. Old blue collar neighborhoods don’t die, and they aren’t attractive to hipsters.
Heh. I grew up in Western New York – I know from bowling.
The girlfriend has tried bowling a couple of times, and dislikes it because “she’s not good at it”. She didn’t like the statement that she would have to practice to get better. Then she tried to claim that it was good because it was exercise. Bowling can be many things, exercise is not one of them.
Some of the most unhealthy individuals I’ve ever seen have been in bowling alleys.
I dated a bowler back in those days with a smokin’ body. OTOH it could be that he was 19 years old….
I’ve yet to see someone try to bowl on a Rascal scooter, but I’m sure there’s videos out there of people trying exactly that.
Florida Man:
Finished putting together my AR pistol yesterday. Went with an Omni Hybrid lower (for the weight, as well as the fact that it was only 30 bucks), the Shockwave brace and the Palmetto State Arms classic M4 lookalike upper. Got it in 5.56 for the lower recoil (and the cheaper ammo). The Shockwave brace is surprisingly versatile and comfortable to use in many different configurations.
Can’t wait to go shoot it today.
I’m excited for you. Can’t wait for the range report.
The Shockwave brace is surprisingly versatile and comfortable to use in many different configurations
Interesting. *Googles*
Oh, its for firearms. Never mind.
The headlines at Slate haven’t changed for a couple of days. Apparently, the entire staff committed seppuku.
Crosses fingers.
Seconded.
Don’t tease/
Anyone else read that as “Straff committed seppuku”?
Oops. There’s at least one writer still alive at Slate.
Are they wearing any cloths or did they rip all of them to shreds?
“Male membership in civic groups has fallen a half to two-thirds since the 1960s. Just half of men are husbands, compared with three-quarters a half-century ago.”
Ummm… why does this matter?
A new talking point has surfaced recently which blames the “lack of civic participation” for political polarization. They for some reason not clear to me neglect to mention the concerted efforts of government expertists over the course of several decades to stamp out civic voluntarism in pursuit of local municipal problem solving.
A decline in membership of private organizations does lead to more government
There’s a confounding variable at work, methinks.
Not really.
Nothing in the realm of human behavior in aggregate is ever so neat.
I think so
My ex was kind enough to text me on my birthday, but I can’t very well eat a happy birthday. What I’d really like is a nice birthday lay. AFAIK she’s not seeing anyone. Where’s the love?
I hope this was the text of your reply to her.
Seconded. Although ex-sex is only nice if she didn’t let herself go and not weighs over 300lbs like mine did.
But you still fucked her…
I think it would be rude not to.
Wasted quite enough self-esteem barking up that tree.
I don’t get it, either. We had a perfectly serviceable, one might even say adequate, sex life. She moves away, moves back, and it’s like we’d only ever been friends, and not especially close ones at that.
Right here.
The least she owes you is a handy.
Apparently, the entire staff committed seppuku.
Too bad google street view doesn’t offer real time viewing. If they all defenestrated, I’d kind of like to get a shot of the pile of bodies on the sidewalk as wallpaper for this computer.
Personal greed?
Or running for president and personal greed?
https://nypost.com/2018/10/08/clintons-gear-up-to-cash-in-on-the-lecture-circuit/
The Clintons announced Monday they will visit cities this year and next across North America in a series of conversations dubbed “An Evening with President Bill Clinton and former Secretary of State Hillary Rodham Clinton.”
Tickets, depending on the seat and venue, range from $70 to $699.
The tour will be produced by promoter Live Nation, the company behind Michelle Obama’s massive tour to promote her new book as well as tours for Beyoncé, Taylor Swift and Bruno Mars.
The couple will hold joint conversations at the shows and share “stories and inspiring anecdotes that shaped their historic careers in public service, while also discussing issues of the day and looking toward the future,” Live Nation said.
PresidentBill Clinton andformer Secretary of StateHillary Rodham Clinton.The title goes with the office. You don’t get to keep it after.
$70 to $699
Anyone who pays that is an idiot.
I would settle for “disgraced former President Bill Clinton and execrable former SoS Hillary Clinton”.
I’ve always hated that affectation. It’s not a patent of nobility. There are exceptions for coach and various esteemed individuals whose job is part of their personae.
Ditto for Mister Napolitano.
I am surprised that after the Haitian earthquake last week the Clintons didn’t “volunteer” to go help out again…
older men who have remained unmarried too long
I’ve made it this far, you’l never get me, now!
*clenches K-bar in teeth, runs into forest*
This post might not be the right place for <a href="https://www.navytimes.com/news/your-navy/2018/10/08/navy-petty-officer-wins-transgender-bodybuilding-contest/" target="_new"this revelation. I am happy for him/her or whatever they think they need to be called, but man are us Navy guys gonna have to roll with the punches after this.
John Mayer says that “WE NEED A NEW ‘MALE CONTRACT’ …
Screw This Alpha Male BS” and proposes:
“John Mayer wants to can the idea that men must be alpha males and take what they want — including women — and replace it with a new doctrine focused on respect and sensitivity.
The guitar-slinging crooner was doing a cancer benefit show Sunday night at the Modell Performing Arts Center in Baltimore when he went off on a tangent about toxic masculinity, which he called a “bulls**t” alpha male contract that’s nailed into boys’ heads from a young age.”
Yeah, this will work well for guys. Unfortunately for him and other beta guys, I feel compelled to point out that while chicks pretend to like beta dudes and that alpha guys are dicks, these chicks (not to be confused with the ugly male hating types that make the majority of lefty types) always seem to end up fucking the alpha guys. Betas are much nicer to hang out with, and even to marry (so they can then nag the fuck out of the poor dude until they divorce him and take his shit), but the alphas have the sex.
My wife used to like his music in college, and I absolutely ruined it for her.
I do an impression that you can’t unhear.
A buddy of mine used the expression “sweatin’ like John Mayer tryin’ to sing” once, and while I don’t know what it means I find it absolutely hilarious.
Can you also please ruin Dave Matthews for people.
I loathe that fuckhead.
You can be tough and a nice guy. I don’t see the two aspects as mutually exclusive.
John Wayne
Charles Bronson. Andre the Giant.
John Mayer is an idiot.
The idea that strong, self-confident, unabashedly-masculine men are bad is what’s toxic. If you look at typical male role-models, they’re not bullies–the bullies are their inferiors–they’re honest, they’re courageous, they admit their own weaknesses and failings without using those as excuses to avoid doing the right things, they keep their words, they work hard, they sacrifice of themselves for others, all sorts of things that are positive traits you want to see from everyone, man or woman. People want to be around people who display those qualities, not around people who are oversensitive, or cowardly, or who show the typical “beta” traits. Because you can’t trust a “beta”; you can’t rely on them in a difficult situation, you can’t be sure they won’t stab you in the back, and you know you’ll have to carry their weight because they can’t do for themselves.
And like I say, those are traits you want to see in men and women, it’s just that when you see them in men they’re displayed by people who act like leaders, and the people who push this “toxic masculinity” shit don’t want strong leaders, at least not from outside of their own ranks.
If I were to write Cliff’s Notes for Atlas Shrugged it would be this.
That can’t be the Cliff’s Notes to Atlas Schrugged . Even in Cliff’s Notes form, “the Speech” would have to take at least 13 pages.
” a “bulls**t” alpha male contract that’s nailed into boys’ heads”
reminder:
this is the guy who has banged ever superstar bimbo in sight for 2 decades and then talked shit about them to tabloid press
he even fucked kim kardashian before Kanye.
now he’s playing woke. and it will probably work.
For the record, John Mayer gets laid … a lot.
So this guy highjacks a cancer benefit to rant about some totally unrelated social justice hobbyhorse?
Christ, what an asshole.
So, to wrap up the “who’s a christian” debate, I’ll turn to the experts on the topic.. Parker and Stone. From the South Park Mormons episode:
If you haven’t watched that episode, you must do so immediately. Do not eat or sleep until you have seen it. It is brilliant. (as are the scientology episodes)
Also, go see the Book of Mormon. “I Believe” is worth the schlep down to the theater all by itself.