By Fourscore (plus one now)

All of us are getting old(er) but when does it happen? How does it happen? Do we know we are getting old?

Most of us have had grandparents or parents that we saw growing older and older. We really never thought much about it on a personal level since it wasn’t happening to us. As kids we believed our parents were super people that could do anything, solve any adversity that was thrown at them and always be there for us. We knew Grandpa walked a little slower but still could play golf and catch fish and always seemed to have ice cream money for us.

We grew up, went off to conquer the world (’til we got married) and then had kids of our own. Suddenly our own parents were grandparents! What the hell is up with that? They must be getting old!

If they are getting old what does that say about us? When do we or did we get old? Well, I’m gonna relate those things that I experienced, indicators that tell me I’m old on a daily basis.

The physical changes are subtle but are happening to all of us as I speak. Yeah, you and me. When I was 40 I was playing driveway basketball with my kids, I was still taller and could out rebound them.

When their friends came over I got to play if the sides were uneven and would sometimes get chosen first (unlike high school). A couple years later my son was taller than I, had better skills and the boys relegated me to my daughter’s team. By my mid 40s it was like, “Hope your Dad isn’t going to play, he screws up too much.”

Then one day I went to Seattle to work for a few weeks, I found I couldn’t tell the difference from an 1/8 to a 1/4 on a tape measure, what was up with that? In the evenings at the motel I couldn’t read, my arms had gotten too short. A few weeks later I checked into the local optometrist and got my first pair of glasses, it was a miracle! I could see again, I was 47 years old. Along life’s journey my boss made me an offer I couldn’t refuse, if I would stay ’til I was 55 I could retire and enjoy some benefits that we had worked out.

My wife and I had bought some rural property earlier and remodeled a rundown cabin. We started building a retirement home two years before retirement, working every weekend, every vacation and every day I could sneak off from work. When the big day came we moved into our home and finished it out, hell, I was a young guy, right, 12 hour days were something I’d grown accustomed to and was no big deal.

The days went by, growing a big garden, cutting fire wood, the fishing and hunting, traveling. My daughter got married, started making babies and now my wife and I were grandparents, what the hell is up with that? Where did the time go? Then my son got married and divorced before the ink was dry on the marriage license.

Life was good, until I got a phone call, a classmate had died and the funeral was…. Then another and another. Every few months. I began to look at my friends and classmates more critically, I’m guessing they were looking at me the same way. I was thinking I was still the same person, but the testosterone was telling me different. Some things were NOT the same! Mrs Fourscore started staying up late, TV was more interesting than me. The side effects of the purple pills were as bad as the hangovers I’d had before I quit drinking.

If one has 2-3 good friends consider yourself lucky. I have my bestie from 3rd grade and two from 9th grade. These are guys that you would loan all the money in your billfold without worrying about getting it back or ever getting it back, and vice versa. I consider myself very lucky and we’re all the same age. A year or two ago I found myself sort of shuffling my feet as I walked outside. I started paying attention and I was dragging at least one foot, not serious but still…. Then I saw one of the boys with the same problem. Another has osteoporosis. I have been falling down a couple times a year, always looking around to see if anyone has seen me ’cause I would be embarrassed.

My work days are shortened to a couple hours in the morning, couple hours in the afternoon. Bending over cutting firewood with a chainsaw is tougher, running a splitter is in 45 minute spurts. Dressing out a deer requires having a tree nearby to help me stand up. We’ve been doing flyin fishing trips to Ontario for the past 21 years, after this last one in June we had to admit we’re just not able to do it anymore. The drive is 9 hours, getting in and out of the boat is difficult and dangerous. It doesn’t hold the mystique that previous years have had.

I only have one prescription pill, a beta blocker that regulates my heart. I run 44-48 BPM, even after exercise I can only make about 60 BPM and is quickly restored back to normal. I use an 81 mg aspirin, any slight scratch or cut bleeds profusely. A calcium and vitamin round out my pill popping.

I’ve had a few surgeries, hernias, varicose veins, 25 years ago had a bone growth removed from my heel. A few years ago I developed a sticky trigger finger and had it repaired, two years later same problem other hand. BTW these would not have been done with single payer, while the fingers were painful and annoying it was not life threatening. Had cataract surgery, resulted in no improvement in vision. A couple years ago I was having deteriorating vision problems, many check ups, new glasses, consultations. The prognosis was not good. Then a few months ago I got my last prescription and suddenly I could see, read, drive safely, it was finally a usable prescription. I’ll be in my deer stand in November.

The psychological part of aging is something that preys on my mind. There are no more surprises in life. I don’t worry about my kids (well, OK, I do) but there is nothing I can do. I can’t worry about my grandchildren, they have youth on their side. I’ve outgrown politics by becoming a libertarian many years ago. All politicians look the same to me. Like many others here I am an introvert, took a long time to learn to like myself. My wife and I have structured our assets in a trust, ’cause my family is mostly dysfunctional.

My two older brothers died 7 years ago, making me the patriarch by default. It’s an easy task, since no one pays attention to me anyway. One older female cousin in bad health, a few younger ones but most with serious health problems. The greatest worry is the mental deterioration. So far, so good.

We’re having our annual Honey Harvest on Sep 16th. I’m hoping the MN glibs and any local lurkers will attend. All glibs are invited, but unless you are in the area it’s not worth the effort. We will spin out the honey, eat lunch, tell lies and we’re family friendly.

As someone who sees his sphere of friends dwindling and mobility increasingly becoming a problem, I am truly grateful to those running this site and all those who contribute to making my days a little brighter. I have a lot of new friends that I’ve never met.