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...is the essence of ultrarunning. Hey! That's not ventriloquism but it is funny, at least to some. Same with ultrarunning: it's not ventriloquism, but it is funny, at least to some.
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This article is a quickly written, poorly thought out, biased introduction to the hobby.
You ready?
Ready anytime you are!
Technically, an ultramarathon is any foot race longer than 26.2 miles. Typical ultra distances are 50k (31 miles), 50 miles, 100k and 100 miles. Marathons are, more often than not, done on roads, and conversely ultras are more often done on trails.
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People run for many different reasons. Ultrarunners tend to run because they like how they feel as they are running. Some people get into ultrarunning through more traditional running (e.g. track and field or cross country); others come into it through hiking (sometimes through through-hiking).
Did I mention that ultrarunning isn’t really running? The nomenclature can be confusing. Someone who has finished an ultramarathon may casually say, “I just ran [name of ultramarathon] ” when in reality that finisher spent a good portion of the time walking or hiking. I guess the boastful may be deliberately choosing a misleading word to make the accomplishment sound bigger, but ultrarunners use the same word when talking to other ultrarunners who know full well how much walking might be involved (depending on the “runner,” the course, and the conditions).
You don’t have to be Albert Einstein to do the math and figure that someone who completes a 100 mile “run” in 29 hours is not running all that time. In fact, some people do complete ultramarathons without running at all. More typical is the mid-packers strategy of hiking the uphills, and running the flats and gentle downhills, and standing still or even sitting when eating or using the bathroom. Yes, there are exceptions even to those rules testified by little wiggly lines in the sand.
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Consequentially, “running” an ultramarathon can be easier (potentially *much* easier) than running a marathon. It’s a great sport for slackers. In the middle of a “race” you can just drop your dummy and stop for whatever reason. Lots of ultra race reports include pictures that were taken by the participants during the race. You can do this when “running” a marathon (and people do), but there is often a different mindset involved.
When someone runs a marathon for the first time, it is not uncommon for that race to be that runner’s first time running that long. Typical training plans for beginning marathon runners have the training go up to 20 miles, with race day being the only time that runner does the full distance. As such, people tend to underestimate how long it’s going to take. In addition to not being aware of just how quickly they may fall apart in the best of circumstances, there’s just enough new stuff going on that virgin marathoners tend to make a lot of mistakes (going out too fast is super typical), yet they cross the finish line and are overwhelmed by emotion when finishing their first marathon.
Anywhere from seconds to weeks after finishing, the disparity between the prediction and reality becomes unsettling, but when thinking about all the mistakes that were made, the next step people often take is to sign up for their second marathon, eliminate the mistakes and see a dramatic decrease in finishing time. However, just as the nascent marathoner didn’t realize how quickly things can fall apart on one’s first marathon, it’s as easy to over extrapolate the gains that one makes between one’s first and second marathon, leading to disappointment on the third.
Some people then fall into a trap and get a bit neurotic about their marathon finishing times. They put in big blocks of time training for an event and then if anything goes wrong (weather, family emergencies, work) they feel let down. They’re no longer running for the fun of running (if they ever did that; there are a lot of people who run their first marathon for reasons other than a love of running).
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Marathon courses are typically measured to be exactly 26.2 miles long, because if they’re shorter they can’t be used to qualify for the Boston Marathon and if they’re longer then all the people who are trying to set new personal records (PRs) are going to avoid them.
Ultras, especially trail ultras, tend to be different. Often the distance of the course is an approximation; the “natural” starting and stopping points, due to where the trails are, might cause a 50 miler to be 53 miles. Whereas the presence of hills on a marathon course (unless it’s a downhill course) tend to turn away marathoners, elevation change on ultras is often seen as a way to change gears (i.e., walk!) or as a challenge. Additionally, weather (and fires) cause course re-routes, so not only is it hard to compare two different ultras of ostensibly the same size, it’s often hard to compare the same ultra from year to year. That helps break the PR-driven mindset.
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Click here to view the entire video on Vimeo
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Did I mention the free drugs? Many people get the runners high when running long but not particularly hard (after years of training, so their muscles, joints and ligaments are all used to the effort). Just watch the portion of this video that has the black and white photos.
These people are about 60 miles into a very tough 120 mile event. Look at their eyes; those people are fucked up. Look at their smiles; those people are happy! Oh, sure, the tequila helps also. In addition to the endocannabinoids your body makes, ultra aid stations often have free beer, tequila or other spirits.
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Ultrarunners tend not to take themselves very seriously. The Dahlonega Ultra Marathon Association (DUMASS)’s motto is “Poor Decisions Make for Better Stories.” The Javelina Jundred, a popular hundred mile race outside of Phoenix, has a major aid station named “Jackass Junction.”
Sure, some people bucket-list a particular distance or a particular race. Sometimes that turns into a one-and-done, but many people find that the slower pace, along with the camaraderie and feeling of freedom leads to a fun hobby that can be enjoyed for hours (sometimes days) at a time and done again fairly soon thereafter. This isn’t always obvious from the race reports and videos that people write and make, because it’s human nature to emphasize the grueling aspects or the problems that had to be overcome.
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Click here to view the entire video on Vimeo
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However, although ultramarathoning is still pretty tiny, it’s growing by leaps and bounds, primarily because it really is pretty fun (to some people) and it’s definitely a lot easier than it sounds.
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Comments
203 responses to “Ultrarunning: A fucked up sport for fucked up people”
“Ultrarunning: A fucked up sport for fucked up people”
WHEN STEVE SMITH CATCH WILL BE ULTRARAPING.
Not rape.
https://hotair.com/archives/2018/06/08/false-rape-accuser-heading-prison/
She got off light.
STEVE SMITH NO CARE IF SENT TO PRISION, IN PRISON STEVE SMITH RAPE ALL PRISONERS. AND GUARDS TOO. AND VISITORS. AND EVERYONE.
STEVE SMITH NO LOCKED IN HERE WITH YOU! YOU LOCKED IN HERE WITH STEVE SMITH!!!
The thing that has most impressed about STEVE over these may years is that he is simply incapable of discrimination. There should be a national STEVE SMITH holiday. Maybe even a whole month.
STEVE LIKE SOUND OF RAPETEMBER OR RAPEUARY. BUT STEVE NOT GONNA TREAT IT SPECIAL. GO AHEAD AND RAPE LIKE NORMAL.
We would expect nothing less, STEVE.
” Later she decided to make up the rape story to win the support and affection of a different boy she had wanted to date.”
Boy meets girl, girl makes up rape story, boy gets girl, 2 black guys go to prison, everyone lives happily ever after.
The penalty for a false accusation should be the same as the underlying crime. And she should have to register as a sex offender when she gets out.
Reading this, the whole time I was thinking about this guy
Not any surprise guy is a farmer. When I was growing up, I used to work for some farmers during the summer to earn some spending money. These old 50-60 year old guys were the toughest SOBs I ever seen.
You see the same thing around here. One of my former coworkers grew up as one of many kids on a farm. Some of the stories he told, I’m amazed he lived through it.
And people give me shit for my shuffling gait. I’m not lazy, I’m efficient.
I am incredibly efficient. So efficient, I’ve reduced my running effort to… zero. Lol.
Wow! I was unaware of this man. That’s really something.
Right? That’s amazing to me. All of these pros train for this thing for years, and he just shows up, like, “Yeah, I think I can do this. Check out my resume filled with sheep herding.”
You would. Maybe lose the veil, first.
But divorced after only five years.
Maybe he fucked the same as he ran?
Slow and steady mang. Slow and steady.
What a stud. Thanks, Riven!
Uffda. That was awesome.
My thought too – he was an Australian folk hero at the time.
Think I’ll be utranapping here shortly.
Dude, it’s Friday, it’s drankin time! I just finished work, now only waiting for wifey so I can pick her up at the train station. Woohoo!
Oh I still might make it out:). Long week.
Interesting. I always thought that ultramarathons were hardcore competitive races for the hardest of the hardocor. This makes it sound more like linear ultimate Frisbee.
I hated running as an elementary school kid. I don’t remember ever running a mile (but I have a poor memory) back then. However, I did play a lot of ultimate Frisbee in high school. Pretty much every lunch and then a Saturday game. I still hated running qua running. I only accidentally discovered that I liked it when a friend had a fun run that I wanted to attend for social reasons. Before that I had already built a strong endurance base by hiking.
Social reasons? What was her/his name?
Heh. I had no sexual interest in the guy who was putting it on. It was a simple 2 mile run, albeit in Las Vegas in August. At the time I had done a lot of hiking and thought it would be fun to show up and say “I’ve never run a mile before, but I’ll run with y’all.”
I was planning on doing just that, but then I got cold feet. A family member of a friend had done some exercise on a hot day (and there may have been drinking involved) and wound up having seizures. Since I knew absolutely nothing about running, I decided to run around my block a couple times (a distance just over a mile) a few days before the fun run–just to see what would happen–and to my surprise, I liked it.
That was July 22nd, 2009. I know the date because I sent email to a friend of mine and mentioned that I had run my first mile and “although I don’t think I’ve caught the running bug … I liked it”. I go back and reread that letter every few years.
Nice article. I watched a Netflix documentary on this one: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Barkley_Marathons
Neat stuff.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dRpEE-82bWc is available for free. It’s by Jamil (who is the race director of JJ100), but John Burton (of the “jacked and jacked-up” photo on the main Glibs page) makes a brief appearance. It was John’s first year at the Barkley Marathons.
Yep, http://barkleymovie.com/ is awesome, well worth watching
That was a great flick.
First “Ultimate Frisbee”, now this. Get off my lawn, damn hipsters.
I should really refresh before posting.
Just set up the typical trip lines and land mines. Works every time.
“Front Toward Hipsters”?
OT, but probably of interest: Charles Krauthammer’s dying of cancer. This is his second run at it, having had an operation last year to try and excise it from his abdomen. He’s saying his goodbyes, and regardless of what you may think of him, his farewell letter is classy.
https://www.facebook.com/FoxNews/posts/10157044437066336
Rogan recently did an interview w/ one of these ultramarathon people. he looked like an animated egyptian-mummy. I dated a woman addicted to running for many years. she started off athletic and fit. she gradually morphed into angular and bony and neurotic. i think fitness is cool – self-destruction via over-exercise, less so.
unrelated: i enjoy the way the term “creative persistence” is used in this piece
obviously gilmored that.
*yes, people should read K-hammers bye bye piece.
Albuquerque lost a talented runner to anorexia. She got flu one weekend and died. It happens and is tragic. Some of the people who have raced some tough ultra marathons have had subsequent issues due to rhabdo and/or metabolic syndrome. It does happen. Sounds like the woman you dated may have succumbed to an unhealthy addiction.
OTOH, some people’s bodies are much more resilient than one would expect. Dr. Marty Hoffman has been doing a longitudinal study of ultra runners and overall they appear to be pretty darned healthy as a group.
Self-destruction is horrible, especially for family members and loved ones, but I suspect it’s less common in ultra runners than the general populace. I know of many ultra-runners who have come from self-destructive backgrounds and turned that tendency into what I believe is a positive habit. For example, in general, ultra runners drink, but there are many who abstain because they have decided they’re powerless over alcohol.
I am mostly kidding when I say “fucked up hobby for fucked up people”, but there’s a kernel of truth in there, if the second “fucked up” is taken as “not normal”.
Just saw that – classy indeed. I don’t agree with the guy on a lot of things, but we are worse off with his departure.
Yes
The letter is classy, the people imploring him to find Jesus are not.
I call it savior syndrome.
Something told me not to read the comments.
Something told me not to read the comments.
“Common sense,” I assume.
What do Christians think happens in the afterlife to good (i.e. practiced Jesus’ teachings) people who are, none the less, buddhists, jews, hindus, atheists, etc. who don’t accept Jesus as their personal savior?
Hell
Well, not all of them:
https://www.amazon.com/Unconditional-Good-News-Understanding-Universalism/dp/0802818358
I have been told that Christ died for everyone, irrespective of their religion or lack thereof.
I would add that I do not think the term personal savior is anywhere to be found in the bible.
So, no Hell? All go to paradise except the non-believers don’t get to be in the presence of God?
The guy was smart, articulate and principled. We didn’t agree on everything but I respect the guy. I am very sorry to see him go.
> Sure, some people bucket-list a particular distance or a particular race
And, do you have such a list?
Even watching your videos, I’m still trying to wrap my head around how this can possibly be “fun.” It sounds like pure torture.
If I’m running, you should be running too, because something is chasing me.
The only things chasing me that I have to worry ’bout in The Lower Rainland™ are grizzlies. And brown bears. Er, also black bears. Um, cougars. Wolves. Bad-tempered coyotes. Those effing crows that are strafing people everywhere right now. The raptors living in the woods near my house.
. . . criminy. I’m FloridaMan.
*bro-hug*
Yes. Exactly.
If I am running, expect there are zombie-velociraptors being ridden by Terminators behind me.
I’d watch that.
When does this movie hit the big screen?
It’s not exactly a bucket list, at least not how I think of bucket lists, but there are definitely some ultras I’d like to do, primarily Hardrock 100, Western States (again; I DNF’d my first attempt), Tor des Géants and UTMB. Before anyone asks: I’m not interested in attempting the Barkley Marathons. Hardrock is pretty tough, but doable by mortals.
And what does DNF stand for?
Did not finish.
or Did Nothing Fatal.
If’n you’re interested, this race is beautiful:
https://www.canadiandeathrace.com/
I’ll be in Grande Cache for a wedding in late August/early September. The bride-to-be was one of the organizers of the Death Race for awhile.
Thanks. I just learned I was an ultra runner for much of my 20’s – as was every Marine in the Infantry. We regularly speed marched over 26 miles. I did over 40 miles in a day once – with a full combat load.
Congrats! One of us! FWIW, I plan on another Glib article on the Bataan Memorial Death March, an event that I learned of via Gary Johnson’s candidacy. Its name sounds disrespectful, but it’s a big deal to the honored attendees (people who were on the actual Bataan Death March) as well as the participants.
I started looking into it after mentioned in a previous comments. A foot march with or without a load at your own pace, just have to finish by a certain time sounds like a goal for me in the future.
Yeah, I love hiking so something like that appeals to me as well.
And the T-shirt is probably pretty cool.
Plan on doing it next year. Each year the number of vets from the real Bataan Death March are fewer. The memorial march is held on a Sunday and the day before some of the vets on the real march speak. It is life changing.
Did your avatar just change?
Yup. Computers are tough, but SP schooled me.
I was interested til White Sands Missile Range. never again.
Better that, than FT Irwin.
The worlds largest cul-de-sac.
was there ’83 and still find sand and spiky plant tips in my stuff.
Giant kitty litter box.
Thanks for the article.
I’m considering doing the BMDM next year.
Fuck Drake. You were in the infantry? I might have to rethink my opinion of you
I think one time they tried to make us go on a march of 10 miles and it took our squadron about 2 before we thumbed a ride with a passing truck.
Uffda. I had “” surrounded by my goofy made up <swinging-with-the-wing-puke> tag and it got swallowed up.
Didn’t mean to throw shade on the infantry.
I love this article. I have a completely new respect for ultras. No one fucking told me there was booze and drugs!!
When someone runs a marathon for the first time, it is not uncommon for that race to be that runner’s first time running that long.
How about the runner’s first race ever? 1995 Twin Cities Marathon. My first and only marathon. My first organized race, ever. I was in a bagillion races over the next 20 years, but 25K was the longest I ever did.
I admire you crazy fuckers.
You would like this: The Marathon du Médoc: running the world’s longest, booziest, race. It’s on my wife’s bucket list.
Back when I was actually running, this was the only marathon I ever seriously considered doing.
I’m a sad, sad man.
Lol.
There are a surprising number of races that are off the radar, including ones that involve drinking. There’s the “A” Mountain Challenge down in Las Cruces. It’s a 24-hour event where you run as many times as you want around a four mile loop. You can do it sober or drinking. The drinking category requires you to drink a beer before each loop. I did 12 loops and then celebrated by drinking some stronger beer.
The Duke City Marathon was my first race. I did it a little less than three months after running my first mile, but I was already regularly hiking the Crest Trail, which is over 26 miles long.
At that DCM, I stopped to use a portapotty at the half way point and could barely get off the pot. I had to use my arms to pull myself up, because my legs had no lift. Then I could barely walk, although eventually I was walking and even running a little bit, until mile 20. At that point my right knee told me in no uncertain terms it was done running. I walked the remaining 6 miles. I’ve since finished over 100 marathon or longer races, although in all but a tiny handful I’m sandbagging and just running at a comfortable pace.
My body is much better at this than it used to be, so what I do these days beats me up way less than what I did in my early days. I run six days a week (and bike on Sundays) and almost all of that is at a heart rate of 130 beats per minute, meaning it just feels great (runner’s high).
Here’s a race that’s only been completed 18 times by 15 runners.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Barkley_Marathons
Side note: I HATE running. Back when I was still playing competitive soccer I could run 11 miles in an hour. That was half a lifetime ago and was only for the purpose of training. I could put up with the running (which I hated) as long as it made me better at the sport (which I loved). Now, I’ve got shitty knees and am old and useless so (like those above) I don’t run unless my life depends on it.
Is that the same as Comment 5? 😉
D’oh!
Fine, I won’t click on your booby links anymore…wait, no…
So, in your next article, would you please explain how one trains for something like this? And what about (non-alcoholic) calorie intake etc?
(Not that I have ANY plans to even attempt such a thing, but subcultures are very interesting.)
subcultures are very interesting.-
Yes! I love learning about things people are passionate about. It might not be what I’m into but I still find it fascinating.
Charles Krauthammer’s dying of cancer.
As long as he dies of something.
signed,
Not a Nice Person
No Ultraman clips? For shame!
Seeing Ultraman led me to think about the Superhuman Samurai Syber-Squad toy I have from my childhood and then led me to remember Guyver. (They all have a similar look, that’s why ma brain connected them)
Who thought it was a good idea to use solar power for your giant robot?
I have an appointment across town. I’ll be back in a few hours. I’m happy to answer any questions people may have.
BTW, I’m aware that I’ve provided enough info that it would be trivial to figure out who I am. I don’t care if people know, but I’d prefer my name not actually be posted in the comments, because I don’t want searches for my name bringing people here. OTOH, nobody agreed to that precondition, so it’s just a request.
No worries, dude. We’re all in the same boat. Thanks for writing the article!
Too late, Tulpa! We’re on to you!
Whatever you say Tom Cruise
No worries here. There are quite a few of us whose careers/personal lives would suffer for the same reason.
You’re the guy in the green loincloth thing right?
You gave me an idea for another article, which would have some identifying bits in it about me, but I would expect that courtesy as well.
Too late, my friend. I know where you drink!
Headed out to Lake Heron for the weekend, by the way.
I have been incredibly lax. I could probably be doxxed in a heartbeat.
I love hiking, but I have trouble walking on any uneven ground these days. I need to get one of those walking sticks or something I guess.
They really help. Really.
I can lend you one of my orphans.
Those are called trekking poles, CPRM.
Or Wookie poles if one is a ‘Wars fanboy. /joke
Great article deadhead – I despise running and genuinely enjoyed!
I’m interested in the community/interactions between runners. I have a loner image in my head, but availability of spirits at ultra stations sounds is making me rethink.
Ultramarathon of tits.
http://archive.is/JiK55
Does thus mean there are no afternoon links?
No worries, if there are afternoon lynx, there will be afternoon tits.
Wow, it’s not every day you see a reference to Dahlonega. I only know of the place because my uncle lives there. Talk about podunk….although actually it’s grown a lot since the ’90s when he moved there.
I’d prefer my name not actually be posted in the comments
Okay, Tulpa.
If you use the SPLC as a resource, you’re a partisan shill.
https://pjmedia.com/trending/prageru-ceo-we-would-be-fools-or-blind-to-not-be-nervous-about-being-on-the-splcs-hate-list/
They jumped the shark when they put Pick up Artists on the list.
Bah. Blockquote fail.
Well now!
That there’s some quality journalismin’.
Who?
This is about the story we were talking about in the AM links – Ali Watkins is a reporter who wrote the initial story that Carter Page was approached by a Russian agent. This was leaked to her by a Senate staffer named James Wolfe, who also happened to be her boyfriend. Wolfe has now been indicted:
Ah ok. thanks, I missed that.
My shocked face is gonna wear out from all the reveals.
I’d be worried if I *wasn’t* on the SPLC’s hate group list.
“Portland in Flames After Alleged Racist Incident at Vegan Bakery”
https://www.thestranger.com/slog/2018/06/07/27192471/portland-in-flames-after-alleged-racist-incident-at-vegan-bakery
It’s not literally in flames.
You had my hopes up for a second.
I was kind of disappointed myself.
“The story goes back to May 10, when Lillian Green, a black woman and an equity director in the Oregon Department of Education, ”
Hmm… I think I have it figured out now.
Portland is a city of people walking around looking for “racism”. I can’t be surprised when they find some.
What a shock that the original whiner is a State of Oregon parasite.
She’s no ordinary parasite.
https://www.oregon.gov/ode/students-and-family/equity/Pages/default.aspx
What a shock. A state sponsored racist unit, that conveniently ignores the state’s largest minority group.
Lulz….oh the horror! The agony! You weren’t served when you came in after the place was closed! MY GOD, HOW DOES SHE FIND THE STRENGTH TO SOLDIER ON?????
Fuck that bitch and fuck that bakery. I’d feel sorry for the employees except they probably would have never been hired by the dickweeds if they weren’t sanctimonious assholes as well.
Ha!
Unsurprisingly, the baker is a leftist too. He’s going to get hoisted by his own retard. He’s going to find out that the game is not about truth and fairness, but winning the media victim game.
It’s all fun and games until you become one of the eggs.
He doesn’t realize that he’s not even playing the same game as she is.
She’s out to get special treatment, and willing to use the race mob to get it.
The bakery is closed, bitch.
AGNTSA.
I did an ultra when my car ran out of gas on I-5 at 1am on the way back to college. A smidge under 44 miles, IIRC.
I do not recommend. I’m grateful to live in the age of cell phones now.
Jesus, no one drove by in all those miles?
I ran out of gas one night on my was back to college from home on I-64 between Richmond and Charlottesville. Fortunately, it was only about 5 miles to the closest exit. Unfortunately, it was also about -2 degrees out. I made it about 4 miles before a passing state trooper picked me up.
And the Paul Harvey?
Chipwooder told him his tale of woe, and as the trooper began unbuckling his pants, he said “Just ain’t your night, is it, boy.”
???
“I Think My Friend Is a Jordan Peterson Fan. What Should I Do?”
https://www.thenation.com/article/think-friend-jordan-peterson-fan-can/
Put your pants on your head and run around in a circle.
Man, how did such a mid mannered dude get so thoroughly in their heads? Pretty impressive actually.
Because he refuses to be contrite and that really pisses off the left. Obey or be destroyed. Plus he keeps pwning them like a champ. Their actions toward him are despicable and that’s obvious to everyone.
They would have been so much better off just ignoring him. They’re not that bright though.
I thought they do that anyway?
The past where they make overt assumptions about the person’s emotional/psychiatric state because they like Peterson is the best part.
Part
Yeah, I’m making an assumption that chick hasn’t told hubby about her “frend”.
You mean the one in her nightstand drawer?
TL;DR – “I really wanted to have an affair with this guy, but I think he might be a Nazi. Is it still ok to fuck him?”
Well, since your husband’s probably not an alpha male, sure, go ahead. :-/
Jesus Christ.
2 comments. The good one has 116 up votes.
There’s hope.
People know. They draw the line at Peterson being ‘alt-right’.
“Some Crazy, Dumb Gay People Don’t Want Cops Protecting Pride Parades Now”
http://dailycaller.com/2018/06/07/crazy-dumb-gay-people-want-no-cops-at-pride-parades
I remember not too long ago some guys on the radio were reading the police blotter from the Chicago pride parade. They fucking need the police.
Nah, just get the Hell’s Angels to do security. What could go wrong?
How about the Nation of Islam?
To likely to condemn the participants. I’m sure there is some anarcho-capitalist private police/insurance company that can do it.
So gay people used to be cool until they disrespected our “heroes” huh? Fuck the police. But then who’s going to force people to bake them cakes and use their pronouns by force? Them? Lol.
After all these articles today, we are probably all satiated and won’t miss the PM lynx.
But, but… TRADITION!
Totally OT, but OMWC and SP, if you happen to see this, I saw on your trip you’ll be in Great Falls, MT at some point. You should come up to Havre (another two hours north of GF); that’s where I am!
^^^ It’s a trap!
Don’t worry, STEVE SMITH can’t find his way here…too far, not enough trees to hide among.
If there are day cares nearby that should work.
What’s in it for us?
Seriously, I shall consult OMWC and our host in Great Falls. No promises, but we might be able to work it out.
E me at sp@ this website if you like.
Sweet. I just emailed you (or tried to – been having some issues lately with emails).
Is that the Middle of Nowhere?
It’s 2 hours north of there.
No, no. Havre is two and a half hours west of nowhere.
Close. I lived in the Middle of Nowhere for a few months, though.
Havre is practically Canada, but without the nice weather.
I looks like you’re going to hit Billings – it would be kind of cool to coincide a Montana meet with your visit – everybody visits Billings once in while anyway, it’s Montana’s only real city.
Where are you located, Endless?
Miles City – an hour and a half east of Billings – my boys live in Bozeman, so I would gladly make that run, too.
I have completed 2 marathons, during which time I invented the sport of long distance limping. I was dead last both times.
I’m not the best but I am persistent.
I have trouble walking on any uneven ground these days. I need to get one of those walking sticks or something I guess.
You misspelled “palanquin”.
There’s always the Rosie Ruiz method of finishing marathons.
Musical interlude.
For no particular reason.
great moments in remove kebab
***
Afonso de Albuquerque, Duke of Goa (Portuguese pronunciation: [ɐˈfõsu dɨ aɫbuˈkɛɾk(ɨ)]; c. 1453 – 16 December 1515) (also spelled Aphonso or Alfonso), was a Portuguese general, a “great conqueror”,[1][2][3] a statesman, and an empire builder.[4]
…
He became known as “the Great”,[1][14][21] “the Terrible”,[22] “the Caesar of the East”, “the Lion of the Seas”, and “the Portuguese Mars”.
…
In order to destroy the power of Egypt, he wrote to King Manuel of the idea of diverting the course of the Nile river to render the whole country barren. Perhaps most tellingly, he intended to steal the body of the Islamic prophet, Muhammad, and hold it for ransom until all Muslims had left the Holy Land.[65][66]
Although Albuquerque’s expedition failed to reach Suez, such an incursion into the Red Sea by a Christian fleet for the first time in history stunned the Muslim world, and panic spread in Cairo.[67]
***
450 year later
[Nelson laugh]
Is that the Middle of Nowhere?
Not quite, but if you have a halfway decent arm you can hit it with a rock from there.
See Double You actually lived in that town. The name escapes me.
Glasgow. We thought naming our towns after ancient European cities would bring people in
No shit? I work with a guy from Ft Peck.
Fort Peck is actually pretty nice, being along the lake there.
I’ve heard a lot of stories about growing up in that area over the years. Never been myself. Yet.
It’s got a pretty neat (though admittedly small) natural history museum right below the giant earthen dam which formed the lake.
In the winter, people drive their pickups on the lake, set up shelters , and go ice fishing.
Pretty nice place to retire, I would think, but a little too boring for me.
Cool article Deadhead. Thanks for the insight into your insanity, so much makes sense now ?. Ultrarunning sounds cool. I love running. And trail running. And hiking. And booze. Maybe I should give it a try?
It’s not for everyone, but there are often gentle introductions. Albuquerque, for example, has some “fat ass” (free, but self-supported) races that are looped events, where N loops is 50k, but people who are curious are encouraged to show up and do as many as they want. One is an 8 mile loop, so N is 4. The other is a 3.3 mile loop, so N is 10. Yeah, that means the 50ks are 32 and 33 miles respectively (instead of 31 miles), but ultra courses are often long (and occasionally short).
The trick, in my opinion, to making them fun is to simply go much slower, especially in the beginning. Walk and even stop if you feel like it. Oh, and depending on the distance, you’ll eventually need to learn how to get calories to process in your system. I’ve heard the claim that more people quit ultras due to stomach / GI issues than any other single cause. It’s trickier than it sounds, although there’s a lot of good advice out there.
The Bourdain suicide boggles my mind. He had everything. I guess that was his problem. Satisfaction comes from overcoming obstacles and working towards a meaningful goal. Money, pleasure, and fame won’t make you happy if you didn’t work for it.
One of the happiest guys I ever saw was a guy named Craig Dietz. He was born without arms and legs. Among his many accomplishments are completing law school, becoming an expert bowler, and competing in many triathlons. At the end of his speech, he said that if he had the choice of being made whole, but losing all his memories or staying the way he is, he would stay the way he is.
Oh, I think Bourdain worked for it. Suicide’s a difficult headspace to understand at the best of times.
That makes it even harder to understand. He worked hard, got everything, and was still unhappy?
When you reach the top of the mountain, the only thing left is to climb back down again. I get that. But why jump?
It’s like that 104 year old guy who committed suicide. Like you said, it’s hard to understand.
This is also I guy who was addicted to drugs at one point in his life. He also had a couple of divorces under his belt. You don’t know if there was bi-polar or other mental or health problems going on. It one thing to say from the outside that someone has it all figured out. And Bourdain was successful from many perspectives. But from the inside that’s a different story.
I think you’re looking at the issue too logically. When you suffer from depression, it doesn’t matter how much, from the outside looking in, you have. Trust me, I know.
There’s no sugar-coating it- I don’t empathize.
That’s fine. I’m saying that, when you suffer from depression, you have trouble thinking logically. It may be true that you have everything that someone with a normally-functioning brain would kill for, and yet you feel like you should end it all.
‘Zackly. Could’ve been something as simple as feeling his age, and couldn’t handle it. How’s that saying go? “Getting old isn’t for sissies.” I knew a guy who ate a shotgun in his 70s ’cause his age was starting to deny him all the physical pleasures of his life, and he couldn’t compensate with more intellectual pursuits (reading, hobbies that didn’t involve riding around on vehicles with engines, etc.). Unless Bourdain left a note, we’ll probably never have any real insight into the “why”.
A guy I used to work with ran the Western States race once. It’s 100 miles. Lost all his toenails.
Losing toenails sounds horrible, but it’s typically not really a big deal. The body pushes them out and they can then be torn off without pain or mess. Luckily, this guy documented it for us: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wq0I7T5lDmE