STEVE SMITH HERE TO GIVE ADVICE! HIM SEE TOO MANY PEOPLE GO LOOK AT “DEAR ABBY” COLUMN FOR HELP. THAT NO GOOD! STEVE SMITH DO BETTER. HIM HELP FUNNY GLIBERTARIAN PEOPLE. HERE BETTER ADVICE THAN OLD LADY WHO SMELL LIKE HAIRSPRAY AND BRAN FLAKES:
Q: We moved to the country, but we’re not really far out of town. My educated, urbane, professional husband who has always lived in the city, now bypasses our 2 1/2 bathrooms and relieves himself outdoors in a “king of all he surveys” pose.
We no longer have children living at home, and he refrains from doing it when we have company or there’s any possibility of his being seen, but it still drives me crazy! Could I be jealous because I am female, or should I join him? Is it truly as unsanitary as it seems, and is my letter a “first”? — TEMPTED IN CALIFORNIA
A: STEVE SMITH LIKE HUSBAND. STEVE SMITH POSE AS “KING OF ALL HE SURVEYS” WHEN HIM GO TOO! OF COURSE, STEVE SMITH IS KING OF ALL HIM SURVEY, IN FOREST. STEVE SMITH I, FIRST OF THAT NAME, KING OF FOREST! LORD OF RAPE! EARL OF ASSAULT! …
BACK TO QUESTION. OF COURSE YOU JEALOUS. JOIN IF CAN. IF JOIN, MAKE IT QUICKER FOR STEVE SMITH IF HIM VISIT. BY VISIT, MEAN RAPE. IF TOO EMBARRASSED TO JOIN, HIT HUSBAND ON HEAD WITH BIG ROCK, MAKE STOP.
Q: I need advice badly. A close family member has been living with a woman who sexually assaults people by grabbing their genitalia, kissing them forcibly on the mouth and touching their buttocks. She’s completely without boundaries.
We have an important family event coming up and have decided not to invite her because we don’t feel safe around her. The close family member is incensed with us, furious even. He chalks his girlfriend’s transgressions up to “medical events.”
Abby, are we right to not allow her to be part of situations where she will undoubtedly behave like this? Or must we “just accept it and move on,” as our family member insists, in spite of being well aware of her pattern of behavior? — ANONYMOUS IN THE EAST
A: STEVE SMITH SYMPATHIZE WITH CRAZY WOMAN….BUT HIM NO TRUCK WITH COMPETITORS. CAN BE ONLY ONE WITHOUT BOUNDARIES! AT LEAST ON LAND. COUSIN SEA SMITH HAVE NO BOUNDARIES IN WATER. STEVE SMITH HAVE TALK WITH CLOSE FAMILY MEMBER ABOUT MANNERS. BY HAVE TALK WITH, MEAN RAPE. IF HIM NO LEAVE CRAZY GIRLFRIEND BEHIND, STEVE SMITH SAY RELAX. TRY ENJOY IT. OR HIT CRAZY ON HEAD WITH BIG ROCK. YOU CHOICE.
Q: When I met my husband, he dressed impeccably — suits, sharp sport coats, monogrammed shirts, freshly pressed dress slacks, top-of-the-line leather shoes. Even when we went out with friends for a casual night or a movie, he still dressed well in current, fashionable clothing. I fell in love with a man who dressed beautifully (my father was known for his attire as well, which is perhaps why I like the successful look).
Now that he’s retired, his jeans always look dingy (they’re not dirty; they just look like they are), his sneakers look worn, and he just doesn’t care about his appearance like he once did. When we go out together, I’m embarrassed.
I love the man who used to care about his appearance, not this retired, sloppy-looking guy. If I complain, he tells me I’m being ridiculous. I don’t expect him to look like he once did (office attire), but he should at least look current, crisp and clean. Am I wrong to be embarrassed? — LIKES THE OLD LOOK
A: STEVE SMITH IS DISAPPOINT. YOU SOUND LIKE IN LOVE WITH CLOTHES. NOT MAN. “CLOTHES DO NOT MAKE THE MAN”. HIM WORK HARD ALL CAREER, NOW HIM WANT RELAX, YOU NAG. STEVE SMITH SAY LEAVE ALONE! HIM VISIT TO MAKE SURE YOU SHOW RESPECT. BY VISIT, MEAN RAPE.
STEVE SMITH DRESS “FOREST CASUAL” ALMOST ALL TIME.
NOW STEVE SMITH MAKE EXCEPTION. IF YOU HUSBAND LOOK LIKE THIS:
THEN HIT ON HEAD WITH BIG ROCK!
Comments
179 responses to “STEVE SMITH GIVE ADVICE, AGAIN”
Dear
ZardozSteve_Smith,A large grey rectangle is now covering about 25% of the screen on my 5 month old TV. Within the rectangle are 3 small perfect circles, about the size of pixels, with radiating crack lines. The glass is perfectly smooth.
It just happened while I was watching, no one touched it. LG says the warranty will probably not cover it because it is physical damage… those lying fucks. They will let me know in a couple days.
Is there anything I can do besides ranting like an asshole at the poor guy in India making 20 rupees/hour that took my call?
Thanks,
SSD
RGB lamp overheated and cracked the screen from behind
That makes sense. Do you think the tech would be able to see clear evidence of overheating on the inside if they took the panel off?
I could, so Yes they should..
Thanks, I’ll mention this to the tech.
He chalks his girlfriend’s transgressions up to “medical events.”
I’d like to hear about these “medical events”.
Electro-shock therapy?
Cocaine is a helluva drug.
‘My educated, urbane, professional husband who has always lived in the city, now bypasses our 2 1/2 bathrooms and relieves himself outdoors in a “king of all he surveys” pose.’
What’s the point of enduring the debt, tedium, and hardships necessary to obtain an education, comfortable urban living, and what can only be assumed to be a successful profession if one can’t cash that in for the privilege of pissing proudly on the land you own?
I love pissing out my back Door, same place My Dog does, Why not Me?
If she really wants to treat him like a king, she needs to provide him with one of these.
These are some weird questions this go around.
(1) Pee outside. It’s glorious
(2) Would your friend
(3) Your father might have been gay (not that there’s anything wrong with that)
I am living proof that the “slob” gene is dominant over the “gay” gene.
I shouldn’t have stereotyped. My bad.
As a fellow slob, I salute you
Whew, I was about to log off in a huff and run over to Everydayfeminism for comfort.
Figures
“A close family member has been living with a woman who sexually assaults people by grabbing their genitalia, kissing them forcibly on the mouth and touching their buttocks. She’s completely without boundaries.”
If this was about a guy doing all this, would there be any question as to “should we tolerate this” at all? Why is this even a question? Yes, don’t invite this person over.
If it was a guy, he’d probably be in jail. Or recently retired, as Vice President.
Article on the BBC today about unrest in Trier over the Chinese sending them a bronze statue to commemorate that fucking layabout Karl Marx. Behold the supreme idiocy of EU-head Juncker:
“But speaking in Trier on Friday, European Commission President Jean-Claude Juncker said Marx today “stands for things which is he not responsible for and which he didn’t cause because many of the things he wrote down were redrafted into the opposite”.
Thoughts?
They just palmed off one of the hundreds of statues of Marx that used to litter the DDR, didn’t they.
“there is only one way in which the murderous death agonies of the old society and the bloody birth throes of the new society can be shortened, simplified and concentrated, and that way is revolutionary terror.”
Juncker is a moron.
Fuck Marx, Fuck Socialists, Fuck the EU, Fuck “standing for things” as a euphemism for 120 million murdered. Those are my thoughts.
Also remember that Marx adhered to the belief that capitalist conditioned individuals could not be argued into socialism. Therefore the only way to bring about glorious socialism was through the use of force. It follows that the only way to maintain socialism was through the use of force as well.
Moron.
I pee in the yard at our cabin all the time.
Groin grabber must be butt ugly, or no one would be complaining.
If the wife was still giving him blowjobs, he would probably still care about how he looked.
Well, she says this gal does this to “people” not specifically men. Perhaps the non-lesbian women don’t much appreciate another woman forcibly making out with them. And maybe she’s grabbing married guys or guys in serious relationships that don’t appreciate some woman that isn’t the wife/girlfriend grabbing them.
Still…
When the altar boys were very young we went to the cabin and they laughed and laughed at our dog who spent the first two hours there marking his territory. They asked why he pissed so much so I explained that he was letting all the other dogs know that he owned this cabin, yard, dock, trampoline, tree, etc.
They thought that was so cool and decided to get in the game. That entire summer they would piss on things and proudly proclaim that they owned it. Then the other would try to piss over it and reclaim ownership.
I thought it was super funny, but the wife was not amused.
LOL
Springfield Armory Severs Ties with Dick’s Sporting Goods
posted on their facebook page:
Didn’t Springfield Armory get caught supporting anti gun candidates in Il or such?
Liking this big rock idea.
I pee outside as soon as I’m out of the truck when I get home. Girlfriend hates it.
She jelly.
Women say they’re disgusted by men peeing outside, but that woman who wrote the question is being more honest: they’re just jealous.
Could we get one of the ladies to chime in with their opinion? Oh wait, I forgot this is a libertarian website and so there’s no women.
My wife has no problem peeing in a horse trailer at a show. She rocks.
She doesn’t really hate it. Maybe finds it dumb I don’t want to walk inside.
And waste water.
For the environment.
***
When I met my husband, he dressed impeccably — suits, sharp sport coats, monogrammed shirts, freshly pressed dress slacks, top-of-the-line leather shoes. Even when we went out with friends for a casual night or a movie, he still dressed well in current, fashionable clothing. I fell in love with a man who dressed beautifully (my father was known for his attire as well, which is perhaps why I like the successful look).
***
If nice clothes or a nice car is all it takes to impress you, we probably aren’t going to get along. At all.
“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat, or about your body, what you will wear. For life is more than food, and the body more than clothes.”
-some long-haired, bearded, sandal-wearing weirdo whose name rhymes with Cheez Whiz
http://hvb-6631.kxcdn.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/02/2c94a28139cf9516575093f6e2ab4a7b.jpg
https://clackerville.files.wordpress.com/2014/06/flbp-future-lower-back-problems-23.jpg?w=550
Uncanny valley on that one – creepy
SHUT YOUR WHORE MOUTH! I would marry her right now even if she was carrying a boiled bunny.
and I will now watch Anchorman again.
https://i.pinimg.com/originals/dd/ab/b2/ddabb206db3ac1e48c556f707b2f326c.jpg
http://img.eagleee.com/newsbackend/image/44a9fd81aa2c8e0ffd966d3f70cffa5a3f23bd7a.jpg
https://pbs.twimg.com/media/DUMt08PVAAUgLoj.jpg
https://i.pinimg.com/originals/1c/9f/49/1c9f4934ff05b924d35db82c1991af55.jpg
https://i.pinimg.com/originals/9f/30/50/9f3050144e8a227d9c44f8150125f9d2.jpg
https://cdn.totalfratmove.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/12/bcd7b0556fbef00e6450882b8359553b2099197575-500×400.jpg
https://pbs.twimg.com/media/DDvyPuuUAAE7PJ1.jpg
I’m a big fan of your work Q, but I’m not feeling this last one. Her features seem strange
Yeah you are freaking everyone the fuck out with that shit Q. Even the gay.
This is not Q’s best work. But, like the saying goes “never look gift tittays in the mouth” or something. I’ve been drinking
Yeah, I couldn’t let that one go without a remark.
Oh man, it’s that faked neotenous traits look.
What?
That pose and her makeup choices are for the “angelic” look (charitably) or “child-like” look less charitably. It’s creepy.
You don’t think that by pairing it with the bustier corset of skulls and having her biker boyfriend in the background, she’s making a biting, ironic commentary on modern socio-sexual norms?
2 for the win.
Might as well put this here:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Brian_Steele
***
Brian Steele is an American actor who has had many roles as monsters and creatures on television and in films. He stands 6 ft 7 in (2.01m).
…
2006-2014 Steele portrayed the Prank redeeming Sasquatch in over 40 Messin’ with Sasquatch Commercials for Jack Links Jerky. On television, Steele played the Bigfoot called Harry in the series Harry and the Hendersons before moving on to play creatures in theatrical motion pictures, with roles like Mr. Wink in Hellboy 2: The Golden Army wearing over 130 pounds of makeup.[1] Steele has portrayed Drake Beast in Blade: Trinity, Sammael in Hellboy, Lycan werewolves in Underworld and Underworld: Rise of the Lycans, William Corvinus in Underworld: Evolution, T-600 in Terminator Salvation,[2] Berzerker Predator in Predators,[3] and a Bigfoot in Eduardo Sánchez horror-thriller film Exists.[4]
***
Wow, *2* roles as Sasquatch.
The original Sasquatch in the Harry movie (Kevin Peter Hall) also played the Predator in 2 movies.
and 1 as Bigfoot!
It’s funny that he plays all the Sasquatches. Six foot 7 is nowhere near so tall that you should have trouble finding people that height. It’s not like he’s Peter Mayhew or anything.
“My favorite meat is hot dog, by the way. That’s my favorite meat.”
That’s a quote from Mitt Romney that I just read in an article. So clearly Mitt Romney is trying to sound like a regular guy, but clearly he has never eaten a hot dog, because no one would ever call a hot dog “meat”.
What a weird guy
No, you misunderstand, he did his mission in Cambodia and he means dog meat cooked with hot peppers.
Mitt Romney would make Ned Flanders say “geez, that guy needs to loosen up a little.”
lol.
He stores them in binders.
Mitt Romney did buy hot dogs once, but he left them on the roof of his car and drove away.
Nice! I larfed good Gilmore!
See… all of the advantages of eating a hot dog can be equally enjoyed by eating some other sausage that doesn’t taste like ass. Hot dogs are like the Budweiser of sausages – Americans took a fine concept and popularized the shit out of it with a vastly inferior product.
I fucking loathe hot dogs, but like all sausages proximal to hot dogs. Bratwurst, Italian Sausage, Kielbasa. You can eat many of these exactly like hot dogs and I greatly enjoy doing so.
I will eat hot dogs if you cut them up and cook them in tomato sauce, because Mom, but that is the only way I can stand them.
I disagree.
When’s the last time you had a hot dog @ Katz’s? they’re delectable.
There was a place in Westcheter when i was in high school which was super-fucking badass…. Walter’s, in Mammaroneck; still there. absolutely fantastic. My brother got them to cater my neice’s bat mitzvah. I ate like 6 of them
Or OG Coney’ Island Nathan’s, back in the 1980s. Papaya King? Yankees Clubhouse franks?
HOW DARE YOU IMPUGN THE INTEGRITY OF THE HOT DOG
Hear Him!
Only been to Katz’s once in 20 years 🙁
And it wasn’t for a hot dog.
TBH, I like the “white hots” that are popular in my hometown (generally, Zweigles). I think they’re beef?
But no, otherwise, I’ve never cared for them my whole life. Like Diego up there, I like most other kinds of sausage. There is a certain taste that is common to all Frankfurters that doesn’t appeal to me.
I agree that most store-bought dogs are like boiled dogshit. and i can see them not appealing to everyone.
but i think they can be unfairly seen as “cheap, low class”, pig-lips, eyeballs-and-assholes type stuff, when there are actually “gourmet-quality” hot-dogs out there that are nothing to sniff.
I basically never eat them outside the above mentioned joints. tho every now and then while drunk as fuck i’d pop in a Papaya King and get a dog while walking from one place to another.
Oh, also @ Rudy’s on 9th avenue You eat them as sort of a “coming of age” ritual.
“Coming of age” as in bar mitzvah given the carding practice everywhere back in the day.
Katz’s is one of those rare tourist traps (and it seems to have really, really become one–both because of “meat gentrification” and the actual gentrification of the area, both incredibly extreme) that is not joking around. It is amazing. Go. But I have to admit I have never had the hot dog but I bet it is excellent (not that I’d trust a dude who raves about Nathan’s; I’ve heard it elsewhere too and I doubt it could be otherwise) as far as hot dogs go. If I wanted to get into hot dogs I’d go there. Still, get the fucking pastrami that’s what you’re there for.
I’d actually love it if there really is better pastrami than Katz’s out there, but I haven’t tasted any and don’t seem to read anything consistent testifying to any.
“”I’d actually love it if there really is better pastrami than Katz’s out there””
I think there’s a case to be made that 2nd Avenue Deli (now on 33rd + …lex? between 3rd and lex i think) is on-par.
When 2nd ave deli was still on 2nd ave+9th (before Abe got shot) people tended to rank it higher than Katz, but i think it was partly the less-cafeteria-ish environment, table service, etc.
Also – Sarge’s is not far from there. like 3rd and 36th? probably not better, but they’re all damn good.
Carolina red dogs. Yumm. But ordinary grocery store hot dogs have a bland sameness that’s offputting. Even Hebrew National franks taste like that now. They used to be a bit superior.
Mr Hot Dog in Butte Montana could change your mind. Nothing like what you buy at the local supermarket. Good as anything I could get in Germany.
You know I actually believe him on this. He’s rich, but he’s not Upper East Side cultural sophisticate kind of rich, where his favorite meat product is actually foie gras or whatever. He’s a Midwestern Republican Mormon. He undoubtedly is far more comfortable around Jell-O salad than grilled ramps. Have you seen footage inside his house? It’s like the most over-the-top Republican house ever. It looks like a museum diorama of Eisenhower-era suburban camp.
He sounds weird and awkward when saying that hot dog is his favorite “meat” because he always sounds weird and awkward. And because he manages to combine that with being incredibly boring (indeed, his boringness is so extreme that it has actually curved around and become interesting in its extremeness), he probably is cartoonishly uninteresting and unsophisticated with his appreciation of meat–to the extent where he does think of hotdog as his favorite “meat” instead of naming a real meat like a normal person. Like, meat is something everyone from a Brooklyn hipster to a red-blooded red state man can be a connoisseur of without leaving their cultural stereotype, but Mitt Romney probably just goes to the Pathmark and picks up a bunch of Oscar Meyers and calls it a day.
Mitt Romney is a parody of a country club Republican. I don’t think of him as a Midwestern politician. I know he grew-up in Michigan, but I think Boston finance when I hear him speak. Most (post) industrial Midwestern politicians are better at appealing to the working class, both Democrat and Republican. Romney is as popular with them as Hilary.
You know you’re probably right. He did even go to boarding school in Michigan not the East (though I have found Americans, even wealthy ones, like staying put into high school and even college). He is almost stupendously unable to relate to Middle America. But I always figured this was mostly due to his awkwardness and weirdness. I mean it is off the charts, so much so that it swamps all other aspects of him. People that weird and stiff you find in all walks of life, and as long as they manage to obtain some level of education they seem to have more in common with each other than they do with their circumstance.
And an opportunistic carpet bagger.
I watched them make Oscar’s dogs in the early 70’s. You’d be pleasantly surprised at the cuts of meat that went into them.
There is nothing quite as tasty as a hot dog cooked over an open fire when you are on an end-of-season fishing trip. Ground the boat, build the fire, cut weenie sticks and FEAST (condiments optional).
It’s interesting the social upshot of the fact that we, with some justification, consider physical abuse by women to be less alarming a danger because of their vastly inferior physical prowess. Like, if your girlfriend hits you under whatever circumstance, you should dump her ass right then and there, no second chances, but you’re probably not going to have the cops drag her away in handcuffs and the DA charge her for it. Similarly, in this case we think about this woman committing innumerable sexual assaults left and right, and we are expected to deal with it in a way that doesn’t get the law involved.
Maybe–in this case, at least–we might want to think about it though. A person who does not have any respect for another’s person is very hazardous to have in society. She can easily escalate to a point where more than a few minutes of tender balls are on the line. Women are generally quite a bit less violent (in intent as well as in opportunity), of course, but here she is not exhibiting much in the way of those reassuring “ladylike” qualities.
see also Paula Poundstone, who now has a comfortable sinecure on NPRavda
***
In October 2001, Poundstone was charged with felony child endangerment in connection with driving while intoxicated with children in the car. She was also charged with three counts of lewd acts upon a girl younger than 14.[10] She changed her earlier plea of not guilty, and, in exchange, prosecutors dropped three counts of committing lewd acts against a child and added a misdemeanor count of inflicting injury upon a child.[10][11] Poundstone also pleaded no contest to one count of felony child endangerment.[11] She was sentenced to probation, six months in rehabilitation, and ordered to perform 200 hours of community service.[11] In 2002, Poundstone talked about her personal responsibility for the events that led to her arrest and the steps she has taken, including a six-month treatment program for alcoholism, but said that she did not commit any lewd acts or child abuse.[11]
Poundstone identifies as asexual
***
Uh huh.
I had my last final exam today. The graduation ceremony is tomorrow but I decided months ago not to attend. I didn’t want to spend the day around thousands of people waiting a few hours to walk across the stage. I’ll find another way to celebrate, perferably with less people. Next, I’ll further delay the responsibilities of adulthood by going to grad school rather than joining the workforce.
Woohoo!!
I’m Smoking some fine Indica after a good, Profitable Day at my Trade. Maybe get a job in your chosen Profession while going to “grad” school, you may find you don’t need any more “schooling” at all.
I appreciate the advice. I feel antsy to get my life started. I feel a strong desire to get a job, to move out and be self sufficient. I’ll get there in a few years. The career I want requires a master’s degree or PhD.
Good on Ya! Make Bank and Enjoy!
Congrats.
Attending my college graduation ceremony never even entered my mind. It took me 5 years to get a BA and I just wanted to get the hell out.
Yup. No way I was attending my graduation ceremony.
One of my promises to myself when I got out of the Marines was that I would not participate in any more stupid ceremonies. Standing formation for some asshole to assume command of some unit still makes me seethe.
People who didn’t attend theirs always say that like their peers who did attend put some sort of high premium on walking with our friends. Most of us did not. The accomplishment still means an enormous amount to us, as it probably did for you, but the ceremony just does not have much connection to that psychologically.
Graduation ceremonies are supposed to be these solemn manifestations of academic tradition, but they are actually there for the benefit of one party and one only–the parents. (Who act like total entitled self-absorbed dicks if you have ever worked one of these ceremonies.) If yours were not there there is no real reason to go. Faculty is bored stupid by them, and students are more indifferent than commonly assumed. Grad students rarely attend theirs. It is a silly, boring, pompous ceremony where some celebrity asshole gets a fake degree and gives a pompous Chicken Soup for the Soul cookie-cutter speech, there are more stupid speeches, and so forth. The last (and first) real graduation is high school.
I even think FIRE is out of line with its pearl clutching about “disinvitations” of commencement speakers. The concept is not well-defined for such events (unlike for “deplatformed” guests of student groups or faculty departments) and in any case the whole thing is too stupid to care about. Who the fuck cares if Condi Rice couldn’t give her anodyne speech and had to be replaced by a Democrat pol giving hers or whatever?
Graduations, like funerals, are for the audience. I did not go to my college graduation and went to my high school graduation with great reluctance.
Oh, goodness. What a great honor it is to share the stage with people who are vastly dumber and lazier than me yet got the same diploma.
Rather OT but you may be interested to know that China has an ongoing cultural fight to eradicate the “uncivilized practice” of strippers at funerals, which is a rural tradition (which, unlike most backwoods Chinese traditions, is actually stronger in Taiwan) to keep the mourners entertained and boost attendance. Now that’s knowing your audience!
I am culturally appropriating that.
One is probably ceremony- jaded these days by the time they graduate college. Last year, Philly had cap & gown graduations for those in pre-K “soda tax” glorified day care.
We lost the war when we allowed preschool/nursery school/playschool/daycare to be called “pre-K” all of a sudden in the public discourse.
In his brave and courageous song about gay marriage Macklemore begins by casually assuring us that he himself has been “chasing girls since [he] was in pre-K” but I bet it was not called that when he was there.
Congrats. What are you studying in grad school?
Mathematics. I eventually want a career in finance or data science.
As a perineal student and antisocial person who hates pomp and circumstance I offer my congrats.
Have you met up with Rhywun IRL? I think the two of you may hit it off quite nicely.
Ew
Did you really mean “perineal”? 🙂
Perennial damnit, and curse you autocorrect!
Ha OK I retract my ew.
And yes I had to look it up and when I did… yikes.
Congrats!
Well done!
Betsy Devos breaks out the whacking stick on civil rights cases:
https://www.nytimes.com/2018/04/20/us/politics/devos-education-department-civil-rights.html
An interesting statistical tidbit from the article:
“According to the Education Department, 41 percent of the 16,720 complaints filed in the 2016 fiscal year came from three people. The next year, of the 12,837 total cases, 23 percent of them did.”
Literally worse than Hitler.
Uffda. 41% of the complaints are from 3 people? That is Brent Bozell-like numbers.
Also, why do I suspect that our sweet protector of the blind Ms Lipsitt may have a financial interest in the “agreements” with the institutions she ratted out?
ADA is one of the most pernicious and destructive pieces of legislation. Millions of dollars of useless waste destroying perfectly functional infrastructure all for little to no benefit.
I’m guessing quite a few billions, actually.
Probably right. It’s only going to get worse as more and more “wouldn’t it be nice if” become mandated.
And these are the same folks who go into full outrage! mode because 400+ NYC subway stations don’t have an elevator. Well, yeah, that sucks but where are you going to get the few hundred billion to put in all the elevators and escalators they demand? And BTW, they get hugely subsidized personal transport anyway but that’s not good enough I guess.
Luckily I don’t think those assholes are getting their way. They make noise every time there’s an MTA meeting.
Governments, who have been given full license to do so by the statute, are excellent at dragging their feet on this. Look at how long it took NYC to install curb ramps, which the disabled really do deserve. (Resurfacing triggers the obligation to install them, whereas patching a pothole does not–a perverse incentive you see fulfilled all over America.) I think they finally are making taxis wheelchair-accessible but those are technically private and fuck taxis anyway.
Around here the state DOT settled with one of those outrage groups and as a result, they and every municipal public works department have been ripping out every perfectly good curbs and replacing them with freshly ramped concrete with those plastic rumble strip boards. Those plastic boards are slippery in wet or icy conditions, worse with leafy debris and a trip hazard. To make the curb cuts, the lightpost footings were exposed, which is a further trip hazard.
And the overwhelming majority of all of those new curbs will never be used by anyone with a disability. Especially the ridiculous ones in the middle of rural nowhere.
In Boston there was lobbying for wheel-chair accessible buses. Such buses are not only much more expensive than regular ones (they have to lower to allow the access) but they hold fewer other passengers. The transit authority said they’d provide special on-call vans instead. Way cheaper and better service (travel anytime you want and no sitting in the rain and snow) The handicapped advocates said no way. They even kept a new station from opening because it failed some detail of the accessibility rules.
That’s one of the things on my dashboard on this site. WTF, does a website need ramps?
You’re safe for now, it seems. But don’t take it for granted. That “online human trafficking” bill crossed the Rubicon of Internet content regulation in one area. And you know what happened to Cal Berkeley.
While demanding that monstrously expensive disabled-voting machines that no disabled people actually ended up using be installed at every voting site in New York State, the disabled lobby was offered all sorts of alternative arrangements that would have made it substantially easier for disabled people to vote than nondisabled (so expensive were these machines). They turned them all down. It is important, the lobbyists claimed, not only that disabled people be allowed to vote, but that they be allowed to vote in the manner of everyone else. Anything less would be a manifestation of their otherness, a separation of them from society in its gathering to vote, a violation of their human dignity. Fuck the actual convenience to the disabled. (A bit like those places where lawsuit trolls force a construction of an expensive new “compliant” wheelchair ramp but actual users beg that the old one stay put alongside it because they like it far better.)
Yeah like I always say I enjoy bitching about cake laws and bathroom laws as much as the next guy, but the rubicon was really crossed with the disability laws. The original racial-discrimination template of “public accommodations laws” was pushed the furthest it has ever been with those–their concept of “discrimination” is downright Orwellian–and the cost to business and consumers has been enormous. (Not to mention, of course, the fact that disabled employment is worse than ever due to the employment provisions.) No one in power dared stand up to this, then or now.
can’t find the original, so here’s a slightly new one
Spot the Not: Mitt Romney
1. I believe in an America where millions of Americans believe in an America that’s the America millions of Americans believe in. That’s the America I love.
2. It’s time for the party of big ideas, not the party of Big Brother!
3. A mere forty years ago, beach volleyball was just beginning. No bureaucrat would have invented it, and that’s what freedom is all about.
4. Together we will build an America where hope is a new job with a paycheck, not a faded word on an old bumper sticker.
5. And fifth, we will champion small businesses, America’s engine of job growth.
6. We do have tough gun laws in Massachusetts. I support them. I won’t chip away at them. I believe they help protect us and provide for our safety.
[head desk]
1
I’m almost positive you fell for the bait. I’d be shocked if 1 was fake. I’m going with the bait in the opposite direction, #5.
I’m going with 2 because I think he believes in a party that’s the opposite of both of those.
Hey, I used the same logic. Alright
4. Too witty for Mittens.
2
Be funny if it was 6
No winners, choose the form of the Destructor:
one
I didn’t watch the video, but now that I look at it again 3 really was the low hanging fruit. That is so out there it would actually have to be a conscious joke, and that kind of dry wit is very much not our Mitty. Excellent job.
Newt Gingrich said that one.
***
Gingrich has flirted with several variations of orbiting death rays. For example, in 2002 he called for “directed energy weapons and laser pulsing systems that could actually [shoot down missiles] from space.” “If you go to a space-based system, we can almost certainly build a workable system,” he said in 2009.
***
Some have dubbed him Newt Skywalker.
Larf!
Yeah I think he is a big Mars colonization guy and has another eccentricity I can’t remember. At least he does not believe in space alien conspiracies, like Hillary has all but stated over and over she does. (To be fair, so did Goldwater.)
Did I not say One?
You did and you were wrong, bitch!
choice 2
Good for Rudy’s that it fought for its right to keep its backyard garden open until closing time (which is itself bullshit). I like gardens in the summer because people can smoke there and it’s the only place you can be and pretend it’s the old days. If no one had ever invented smoking bans I’d definitely have preferred nonsmoking bars but now I just like to see people exercising whatever freedom we have left while we have it.
There is something special about feel of the breeze on your nethers that quite relaxing, especially when you’re hammered.
I find the habitual posing while peeing to be genuinely weird, not going to lie. Peeing wherever is in and of itself never weird. Unless it’s into an infant’s mouth. No offense OMWC.
yeah, posing is weird, but a man pissing outside is just instinctual and primal. And we tend to gravitate towards things to be marked as well, like a wild animal. 5 drunks pissing outside are always going to be pissing on something, not just where ever they please. Be it a wall, a tree, a dumpster…
Yeah I always have found that weird. What is the matter with peeing into the air? Yet do it and you feel this primal need to do it against something. It’s the weirdest thing.
I’m off to Vermejo to fish, so I’ll be offline.
Y’all be good. Or not. It may not be a free country, but we can still be a free people.
Vermejo sounds like a herpes drug.
Side effects may include scaly skin, a fishy smell, fish eye view and a sharp pain in your mouth.
Hillary is from Vermejo? I thought she was from Chicago.
BTW; I swear there was a 90s band called Fish Eye View; but searches are turning up nothing…must be the Mandela Effect.
It was a Phish/ Third Eye Blind supergroup.
Also it was originally called the “mandala effect” and was based on a concept in Buddhist spirituality but people misinterpreted it and started making it about the South African president in retrospect to honor him and people forgot all about the original term which subsequently became so obscure it’s like it never happened. Even today I’m having trouble finding any evidence of the original correct term on Google; that’s how much it’s been swamped by the subsequent misinformation. But that is what happened.
Maybe in YOUR reality.
I don’t know about yours, Mr. Former Governor of Massachusetts, but my faded bumper sticker dates back to a far earlier political race, proudly proclaiming, “I’m with the Duke!”–a memory of my staunch support for America’s last honest politician, David Duke.
Oh, I prefer Bill Duke.
I wonder how badly this is going to turn out for “Testicle-Face” Mueller, “Weasel” Rosenstien and “Lurch” Comey if their house of cards gets tipped? Heh. Sound like Dick Tracy villains.
Mumbles has sad.
Oooh! Do Jeff Flake! I know he isn’t involved but there’s gotta be one. (But don’t bother doing his son. He’s already got a nickname. Though I guess we’ll have to limit him to the non-Code imprint.)
I dunno. “Sniffer”? He always looks like an overconfident rabbit in Farmer Brown’s lettuce field.
How about Dicknose McFuckface?
That never fly in the pages of the Tribune, Dammit!
also, fuck the Dick Tracy NES game!
This ^! What the fuck was that game wherein you started with a full suit of armor and basically were dead after two hits. It took you right back to the start. Who writes that code?
Ghosts and Goblins?
Traffic jam from hell. At least this guy gave me something to think about.
Hmmm. https://pasteboard.co/HjIGzdi.jpg
I don’t want to put a red light on my dick; can I make it a green light?
When they put the late Wilt Chamberlain’s house up for sale, they listed a swim-through living room, a waterbed that took up an entire room, and a modified pedestrian signal that displayed “LOVE” and “DONT LOVE.”
Sure. I kind of cheated. His arm is waving up and down. The timing of my pic was perfect.
Kind of looks like the Johnny Cab robot.
Golden week parking lot?
Yes. U turn rush. The last 30 Km into the city will take a couple hours.
A meta Mandela. This is an earnest sub.
It would appear that the very term “Mandela effect” was coined in woo, not appropriated by it. It’s not even a pop psychology term for widespread false memories. It was first proposed by a “paranormal investigator” who claimed that they were too frequent and too widespread to be the work of a single universe governed by science as the Man wants you to know it.
Also, while other examples she gave were more convincing, it was only on her word (though who cannot trust a professional paranormal investigator?) that her false memory that Mandela had died in prison in the ’80s was supposedly “shared by many other people.” I was only a kid in the ’80s, but I remember apartheid being a rather prominent thing and it would have been quite difficult for an American to know who Mandela was but be unaware that he was still being held in prison. I certainly have never met anyone who actually experienced this particular false memory.
Don’t you remember that famous scene in Lethal Weapon 2 when Danny Glover goes into the South African Embassy and cries about Mandela’s death, and Joe Pesci says ‘You wronged them!” It was such a powerful scene Pesci won an Oscar.
Joe Pesci, there’s your “Dicknose McFuckface”!
Smoked pork belly is by far my favorite. Or it might be drinking all the beer that is. Not sure
Drinking all the beer that is seems a solid plan. Count me in!
Dead thread but when I was a boy the Dads used to dig a hole in the sandy ground, build a hellascious fire within and once it died down, drop all manner of foil-wrapped foodstuffs in there and rebury. A day and night later we’d dig up the food and feast. Nobody ever does the vodka watermelon anymore, either. I’m just going back to my La-Z-Boy and fuck all of you.
I’ve never had gravlax before.
If we win the 2020 election, STEVE, you’re gonna have to give up the advice column. I’m planning to keep you busy negotiating with various heads of state. And by negotiate… well, work it out for yourself. I won’t require any particular method, just results.