Tuesday Afternoon Links

The boy child is home sick watching Fireman Sam, which, in the pantheon of annoying kids shows is closer to Daniel Tiger than Caillou. Although the mythical town of Ponti Pandi appears to have one of each type of Anglophone, including “Southern bachelor” — you know, like Ray Gillette from Archer, but a bit more — queenish. Plus the Aussie and the Canukistani dudes hang out exclusively with each other. That has nothing to do with the links or the afternoon. Just what was at the front of my mind. In SPORTZBALL stuff, the Astros really need more practice winning stuff, as their World Series banner unveiling went… poorly. Thank goodness for men with lawn equipment and a purpose.

Well if Carter, Clinton, and GWB are for it, I’m agin it! Or let’s just say I am the cynic who both agrees that vote fraud is likely a problem in some elections (mostly local) and disagrees that photo IDs to vote will fix the problem.

I might be a fan of Spotify now, as they appear to have made a killing screwing the traditional banksters out of their 35% share of the IPO. The high-level view is instead of the listing banks buying some huge amount of the stock at the reference price and selling at market (almost always higher), Spotify sold directly to the market.

The US Federal Reserve picks most hawkish dove for Presidency. At least this guy is willing to argue that interest rates should go up until inflation materializes. SLD, there shouldn’t be a Fed, but if there is, it would be nice if the leadership would acknowledge that interest rates should be increasing in a period of prosperity, lest they have another easy money collapse and no tools to affect the economy with. Better still if they acknowledged that they don’t actually steer the boat, but hey. Baby steps.

The Zombie (Raccoon) Apocalypse hits Ohio.

I never realized how much this song just straight up rips off “Start Me Up.” The 80s are like a different planet, now.

 

“These kids are just pathetic. P-A-T-H-T-E-T-K. Low-energy losers. I could go out right now and find all the eggs. All the eggs. Like in a minute. MIN-IT! Also, what’s the matter with this fucking bunny? Is he near-sighted or what? Or WHAT? Far-sighted, whatever, I dunno. Can’t he afford LASIK? Loser. Hey, kids, here’s something fake news CNN and fake NBC won’t tell you: There is no Easter Bunny. No Easter Bunny. This is just Jared in a suit! You OK in there, Jared? You OK? By the way, folks, this is Jared’s suit. We didn’t buy this for this, what? what do you call it? Eggroll? Like a Chinese restaurant? Eggroll, really? Dumb name. Just a dumb name. Anyway, Jared already had this. Whoa! Who knows what’s going on at Ivanka’s house. I mean, I got three grandkids–right? three?–so I guess it works out, but, geez, I tell you folks, this pretty messed up. I’m going inside. Yuge disappointment. YUGE!”

Comments

400 responses to “Tuesday Afternoon Links”

  1. Juvenile Bluster

    This Kurt Eichenwald thing is just sad.

    Jeff B.
    ‏Verified account @EsotericCD

    It is quite clear that Kurt Eichenwald is mentally unwell; it is also clear this has cost him his prior professional associations (Newsweek fired him after having to settle a libel suit over him, VF has cut ties too.) I dont feel good dunking on him. Let’s ignore him from now on.

    1. I know it’s kind of a trope to say “so-and-so is crazy” but all kidding aside I think Eichenwald might actually be headed to some kind of breakdown.

      1. Juvenile Bluster

        I’ve been in therapy of various sorts for two decades. I’ve been in a psych hospital before. I can see that kind of vibe with some people.

        Eichenwald has issues. A lot of them. And he has a lot of enablers, who’ve been allowing him for years to no deal with those issues, so they’ve been getting worse and worse.

        1. A Fuggin White Male

          “And he has a lot of enablers, who’ve been allowing him for years to no deal with those issues”

          And that certainly says something about the type of people he had been working with (“journalists”).

          If it’s as bad as we suspect, then I do hope he gets the help he needs.

        2. KibbledKristen

          One of his issues is underage Twink pr0n, so yeah.

          1. Juvenile Bluster

            Wait, he’s into something other than tentacles?

          2. Not Adahn

            He:

            1. Paid over $3000 to the owner of a kiddie-porn website

            2. Received admin privileges to said site.

            3. Said “it was just for a story” and had the NYT legal team get him out of trouble.

          3. Juvenile Bluster

            How the hell did I never know that?

          4. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yRcpuMM51lQ (part 1)

            Part 2 covers the Diversity and Comics rants.

    2. Gilmore

      Its not “sad”.

      It would be sad if he were an otherwise smart, healthy, kind-hearted individual who gradually lost his faculties and turned into a gibbering loon.

      instead, he’s a creepy slimeball who gradually turned into a gibbering loon.

  2. The eternal battle between tits vs. ass is as fundamental as the battle between good vs. evil.

    http://archive.is/P5fU7

    With a group this spectacular, ordinarily I’d say orgy; however if you just send 17 and 29 nobody gets hurt.

    1. Juvenile Bluster

      The eternal battle between tits vs. ass is as fundamental as the battle between good vs. evil.

      Well yes, in that men who prefer asses are evil.

      Well, not evil.

      They just have terrible taste.

      1. ^^^This guy gets it.

    2. Why does one have to be good and the other evil?

    3. Bobarian LMD

      if you just send 17 and 29 nobody gets hurt.

      You’d get hurt. Soul crushed. Broke into tiny little pieces.

      1. I would definitely enjoy the process, however.

    4. Heroic Mulatto

      The eternal battle between tits vs. ass

      ¿Por qué no los dos?

      1. I don’t make the rules.

        1. Spartacus

          Me neither. I just break them into little tiny pieces. Like my soul.

    5. Number.6

      So Manichean, so problematic.

    6. Not Adahn

      The eternal battle between tits vs. ass is as fundamental as the battle between good vs. evil.

      I do enjoy a shapely fundament.

    7. AlmightyJB

      Good God Almighty.

      1, 7, 27, 58, 67, 94, 98

  3. jesse.in.mb

    The boy child is home sick watching Fireman Sam, which, in the pantheon of annoying kids shows is closer to Daniel Tiger than Caillou.

    It’s like parents of small children speak a foreign language.

    1. DOOMco

      Yeah I had no idea what that meant

      1. Bobarian LMD

        I know from time spent with the grand-daughter that Caillou is the devil; so I’m not sure if this Daniel Tiger is literally Hitler, Stalin, or Nicole?

        1. Brett L

          Pinochet? Bad but with some not terrible aspects?

          1. Bobarian LMD

            Thomas the Helicopter Engine?

          2. Pan Zagloba

            Would purchase the Coastal Town Playset.

        2. creech

          What do you figure for “Peppa Pig?” 4 yr. old is entranced by it.

          1. Bobarian LMD

            Beria.

        3. Brasidas

          What historical world leader starts out OK, but over time ends up incredibly annoying.

          1. Pan Zagloba

            Napoleon III?

        4. Daniel Tiger is a creation of Mr. Rogers. He was in the Land of Make Believe but must now have his own show.

      2. Spartacus

        Last time I had a small child at home Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles was the hot cartoon.

    2. Florida Man

      I thought this was the intro for a porno. Boy was I disappoint…

  4. Nephilium

    The Zombie (Raccoon) Apocalypse hits Ohio

    Better or worse then Zombeavers?

    1. Florida Man

      I liked that movie. Stupid enough to be funny.

      1. Nephilium

        I enjoy it as well, but then I love me some terrible B-movie horror films.

        1. Florida Man

          As long as they are self aware I enjoy mocking the genre.

          1. Trigger Hippie

            Oh, then do I ever have the perfect horror movie for you.*

            https://vimeo.com/143630702

            *NSFW

          2. Florida Man

            Luckily I saw the NSFW before I clicked

    2. Look up “Doghouse” by Jake ‘Evil Aliens’ West. That’s another set of classics. (not discussing J splattercore right now)

  5. DOOMco

    I’m mixed on ID to vote. If it became taxpayer funded, I’d be more inclined. That also takes away some of the more common arguments used against.

    1. Bobarian LMD

      Barcode tattoos.

      1. On the forearm.

        1. The Last American Hero

          No. They should be on the bikini line. For men or women.

          1. JaimeRoberto

            That could get ugly.

    2. Spartacus

      You can fit the equipment needed to issue photo IDs in a briefcase. They should just have a setup at the polling places and issue “provisional” voters IDs on the spot when they show up.

    3. creech

      “disagrees that photo IDs to vote will fix the problem”

      Absolutely correct. A few fraudulent votes may be turned away by IDs but most effective (as in changes outcome) election fraud is the voting officials casting votes for those who didn’t show up at the polls or are known to be dead.

      1. grrizzly

        That’s exactly how the voter turnout reached 99.8% in the USSR.

        1. F. Stupidity Jr.

          IIRC, people used to cite that kind of turnout approvingly.

        2. Viking1865

          Pshh, amateurs. Certain precincts reported 100% voter turnout during the Ascension of the Lightworker.

    4. Is there really an issue with adding a photo to a Social Security card? It’s not as though the numbers are really secured at this point.

  6. A Fuggin White Male

    /pol/’s reaction to the Eichenwald saga:

    “How can one man make so many missteps?. This guy is the real-life George Constanza”

    “Haha. Holy shit Kurt is a fucking mental patient.”

    “This guy is a fucking train wreck.”

    “this has gone too far”

    “best thread right now”

    “Kurt really needs to get a fucking psychologist and psychiatrist on speed dial because he is fucking batshit insane.”

    “>lies about where he works for months on end
    At this point I’m more inclined than not to believe that his wife and kid(s) havent seen him in years or that they never existed to begin with.”

    “I laugh and feel kinda bad at the same time. Still funny desu”

    “Kurt Eichenwald is a national treasure, we must protect him at all costs. Not saying don’t troll him, just saying make sure he stays healthy!”

    “It took me a minute after reading to put two and two together that this fucking psycho really thinks what he wrote in that email was reality. His perception or thinking, or both, is completely disordered.”

    “Honestly I’m starting to feel sad for the guy it’s clear he needs a long visit in a mental hospital cut off from the Internet and some really strong meds”

    “Imagine being so crazy you think you’re the hero for shutting down a child pornography site where you’re the admin.”

    “This is really embarrassing now. Is it performance art?”

    And for me personally, well, I’m starting to feel sorry for the guy… but holy shit has he provided me with some first-class entertainment on a slow work day. So thank you Kurt.

    1. DOOMco

      He’s here to help

  7. The boy child is home sick watching Fireman Sam, which, in the pantheon of annoying kids shows is closer to Daniel Tiger than Caillou.

    Pop a DVD of Zabriskie Point in for him. Or if he’s old enough to read subtitles, Les Diaboliques.

    1. jesse.in.mb

      Pop a DVD of Zabriskie Point in for him. Or if he’s old enough to read subtitles, Les Diaboliques.

      It’s like parents of small children Ted S. speaks a foreign language.

      1. Those were just the first two really inappropriate for kids movies I could think of.

        And I’m amazed you haven’t seen Diabolique (the original version, not the Sharon Stone remake). Watch it in a double-bill with Psycho.

        1. jesse.in.mb

          And I’m amazed you haven’t seen Diabolique

          I like that I’ve given the false impression that I’m cultured!

          1. Bobarian LMD

            Cultured like agar.

          2. jesse.in.mb

            Oh you two!

          3. Winston

            John Agar?

          4. egould310

            ?

        2. Dr. Fronkensteen

          Between the bathtub scene in Diabolique and the shower scene in Psyco you won’t get clean for a month if you watch those two movies in a double-bill

      2. Florida Man

        I thought it was a porn intro.,,

  8. Juvenile Bluster

    Holy fuck, Cristiano Ronaldo. That’s not fair.

    1. I’m not watching since Fox decided they weren’t going to show Sevilla/Bayern on any channel (streaming only), unlike the other three QFs. Obviously they hate any team that’s not English/Real/Barcelona.

      I’ll assume CR was offside for both goals?

      1. Juvenile Bluster

        Nah. Madrid’s just dominating.

        He almost made it 3 just now.

        1. Rufus the Monocled

          Fuck Real. And they didn’t dominate the first half. Fuck them.

          Ted, they showed Bayern on my end.

          1. Yes, but you’re in Canada.

          2. juris imprudent

            So, cold and white.

      2. Juvenile Bluster

        Here’s the second goal that had me make the “unfair” comment

        https://twitter.com/FOXSoccer/status/981262742894989312

        1. Rufus the Monocled

          I look forward to the day Real become Fake.

        2. Spartacus

          Jesus. If I was the Juventus GK I would go around to each defender and personally kick each one in the balls. They are apparently not doing anything except keeping Madrid onside.

          1. Rufus the Monocled

            You blow on a fricken Real/Barca player and the ref gives you a fricken yellow. They can tackle and mug you and you’re lucky if they get a whistle.

            Tired of this shit.

          2. Rufus the Monocled

            And yes, you’re right – the marking isn’t Italianesque. Italian defence isn’t what it once was. A total collapse as a whole.

      3. Rufus the Monocled

        No, but they get their usual fair share of weird calls.

      4. Rhywun

        I’m not watching because I loathe both of those teams.

        1. Rhywun

          Oh fuck Liverpool v Man City tomorrow and City have home field advantage next week in Leg 2. Like they’ll need it. Shit.

  9. Drake

    I love the waving leaf-blower gradual reveal.

  10. The Late P Brooks

    Headscratcher, it is

    There’s plenty of evidence that having insurance is a good thing. People with health coverage spend less out of pocket on medical care and are less likely to go bankrupt. They see the doctor more often and get more preventive care. They’re less depressed and tell researchers they feel healthier. Some studies suggest having insurance reduces the likelihood of death.

    Despite those benefits, some 27.5 million Americans under age 65 were uninsured in 2016, about 10 percent of that population, according to the Kaiser Family Foundation. The most common reason: the cost was too high. A Gallup poll suggests that, after declining for years, the percentage of adults without coverage has increased slightly since the end of 2016, when President Donald Trump was elected promised to dismantle Obamacare. Other data show no significant change.

    Uh-huh. Peace of mind is priceless, apparently.

    But… wait a minute:

    Three days after dropping their Blue Cross coverage at the start of the year, Keith took a wrong step and injured his knee.

    It could have been worse. He got it checked out at an urgent care center, where the visit and an X-ray cost him $511. That’s still less than he was paying in premiums to Blue Cross.

    That looks like a rational choice, to me.

    1. Zunalter

      ^This

    2. Bobarian LMD

      There’s plenty of evidence that having insurancea job is a good thing. People with health coveragegood employment often spend less out of pocket on medical care and are less likely to go bankrupt. They see the doctor more often and get more preventive care. They’re less depressed and tell researchers they feel healthier. Some studies suggest having insurance a job reduces the likelihood of death.

    3. The Last American Hero

      I usually just play dumb and tell people that Obamacare solved the healthcare problem once and for all by providing cost containment and affordable access to great health insurance for all and that anything you hear to the contrary is fake news. There are no uninsured people in this country.

    4. Pope Jimbo

      My old business partner’s brother never had insurance. Any time he needed something done he paid cash. Amazing how big the discounts he could negotiate were when he was willing to pay everyone unreportable cash.

      The only thing he every worried about was some sort of emergency injury where he wouldn’t have time to dicker with the docs.

      1. Michael

        It’s so sad that this is considered to be completely abnormal by today’s standards. In my fantasy world you pay cash for all routine medical interactions and carry insurance only for when shit goes haywire.

        1. juris imprudent

          Showing your privilege there cis-shit-lord?

      2. trshmnstr

        The only thing he every worried about was some sort of emergency injury where he wouldn’t have time to dicker with the docs.

        A long long time ago, back when a dollar was really worth something, there was this thing called catastrophic insurance. You paid a very reasonable premium, and when something like an emergency injury happened, you weren’t bankrupted. However, this was an awful idea because … reasons… so we don’t have it anymore.

  11. The Late P Brooks

    Tuping is hsrd.

  12. KibbledKristen

    Update on Eichenwald: Vanity Fair did not renew his contract and nobody “told” him (don’t you have to, like, sign a contract?).

    LOL

    1. Nephilium

      You’d think he would notice when the paychecks stopped coming.

      1. DOOMco

        “Uh, you’re gonna have to talk to Payroll about that.”

        1. Bobarian LMD

          I see a fire in Vanity Fair’s future.

          1. DOOMco

            There was salt on the rim!

      2. Brett L

        “If you could just move your desk down into the basement, Kurt”

        1. Damn your nimble fingers!

      3. Did he get his red Swingline stapler back?

      4. Rufus the Monocled

        +1 Milton and his stapler.

  13. The Late P Brooks

    Vanity Fair did not renew his contract and nobody “told” him

    “We laid him off years ago, but he just keeps showing up every day.”

    1. A Fuggin White Male

      relevant comment from /pol/: “At this point I’m more inclined than not to believe that his wife and kid(s) havent seen him in years or that they never existed to begin with.”

  14. The Late P Brooks

    People near the poverty line got Medicaid for free, while those making more—up to about $100,000 for a family of four—got subsidies to lower the price of private health plans.

    Above that threshold, people pay the entire price. Because the law barred insurance companies from charging sick people more or refusing to cover them entirely, costs for healthy people went up as well. Some insurers have left the market, while others have sharply raised premiums to compensate for actions taken by Congress and the administration to weaken the law.

    Wait, what?

    1. Sean

      Repealing the individual mandate.

  15. grrizzly

    Since we live in a democracy, the election results matter. And the integrity of the voting process is essential. Also, if you haven’t noticed, trust between people of different political views is not very high. A requirement to have a photo ID in order to vote will improve the perception that the elections are not rigged. In practically every country in the world voters have to produce a photo ID to be able to vote; it’s not a burden there and it’s not a burden here.

    1. kinnath

      Since we live in a democracy representative republic, . . .

      1. Bobarian LMD

        Requiring photo IDs for Congressmen?

        I like it.

        They should be sandwich board sized.

        1. juris imprudent

          With concentric circles.

      2. grrizzly

        Of course, we live in a democracy… and in a representative republic… and in a constitutional republic. And some people abroad live in a democracy and in a constitutional monarchy.

  16. Winston

    Man City or Man United?

    1. Juvenile Bluster

      Which one’s more evil? United, by a hair, because they’re scum.

      1. juris imprudent

        So you’re siding with Ay-rab ownership over good ol’ American shit-lords? [stinkeye]

  17. Winston

    Better support military policing you racists:

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Posse_Comitatus_Act

    It was passed as an amendment to an army appropriation bill following the end of Reconstruction

    In the mid-20th century, the administration of President Dwight D. Eisenhower used an exception to the Posse Comitatus Act, derived from the Enforcement Acts, to send federal troops into Little Rock, Arkansas, during the 1957 school desegregation crisis. The Arkansas governor had opposed desegregation after the U.S. Supreme Court ruled in 1954 in the Brown v. Board of Education that segregated public schools were unconstitutional. The Enforcement Acts, among other powers, allow the President to call up military forces when state authorities are either unable or unwilling to suppress violence that is in opposition to the constitutional rights of the people.

    1. F. Stupidity Jr.

      …so he grabs the horse by the ears and yells, “You idiot, I said bring me a POSSE!”

      1. Winston

        So Bob Fosse?

      2. Juvenile Bluster

        The sheriff is near?

        1. Michael

          See? It’s coming off!

          1. Mad Scientist

            Jesse Owens!

  18. grrizzly

    The very beginning of the article:

    John Williams, the genial president of the Federal Reserve Bank of San Francisco and a top monetary economist, was promoted on Tuesday to head the New York Fed in a politically explosive decision that has been criticized for ignoring more diverse candidates.

    The New York Fed’s directors said Williams will on June 18 succeed William Dudley in what is seen as the second-most influential position at the U.S. central bank. In selecting a white man and long-time Fed insider, they said he was the best of an “exhaustive and inclusive” search of diverse candidates and highlighted Williams’ commitment to public service.

    The country is doomed.

  19. Pope Jimbo

    You’ve been warned!

    The woman who believed she was meeting an engaging Minnesotan was unknowingly being lured into a scam.

    The only “victim” of this scam figured out it was a scam before she lost any money. Still Minnesoda Public Radio won’t let a small detail like not having a victim stop it from breathlessly reporting on this epidemic.

    1. Bobarian LMD

      Where’s Tundra?

      1. Pope Jimbo

        Even Tundra wouldn’t hit on a Finn….

        1. Yusef drives a Kia

          I had a Crazy hot Finnish chick in high School
          Crazy and Hot

          1. Bobarian LMD

            Paive (pronounced Pie-Vee) was hotter than the hinges to the gates of hell.

            And not crazy. The English teacher who was her sponsor was fucking bugshit insane, though.

        2. Tundra

          Goddamn right! I have standards, man!

    2. jesse.in.mb

      Oooh, I’ve actually watched a successful romance scam go down. I’d wager a lot of the successful ones never actually get reported based on who gets targeted.

      1. Bobarian LMD

        Did he break your heart?

        1. jesse.in.mb

          Good lord, no. I’m not a good target for romance scams. My crippling emotional issues make me standoffish instead of desperate, so if you come at me all in love without having met me I think you’re fucked in the head and run away as fast as possible. A lot of my second or third dates have ended with me saying something along the lines of “You seem nice and all, but I think you like me more than I like you and it’s best not to continue this.”

          A coworker of mine got sucked in by someone claiming to be a Danish national. She was contacted on Christian Mingle. I had to help her wipe all of her accounts and start over and in the process I saw the angle of attack and the kind of desperation involved. It was depressing.

          1. Better to swear off all human contact. It’s simpler and most people suck anyway.

          2. Bobarian LMD

            So… you’re saying the best way to Jesse’s heart is negging?

          3. Not Adahn

            Rohypnol, I think.

          4. Bobarian LMD

            I don’t believe you’re so much interested in his heart, per se.

          5. jesse.in.mb

            Not Adahn has been paying attention.

            A little attention and then backing off would be more effective than negging.

          6. Pope Jimbo

            Christian Mingle? Everyone knows Farmers Only is where the real action is at.

    3. There are no engaging Minnesotans.

  20. food and housing insecurity may be keeping college students from graduating

    My favourite part is the survey conclusion that 10% of students are homeless. The most rage-inducing part of the interview, is where the interviewee states that since college is the new high school, therefore we need more public funding of food and housing for these students. Fuck off lady.

    1. The Last American Hero

      Sharing a house with a half a dozen other broke people and subsisting on Ramen for 3 years totally wasn’t a thing until 2018, apparently.

    2. “college is the new high school”

      So by continuing to inflate it with public money, we wait until graduate school becomes the new high school?

    3. trshmnstr

      One of my classmates literally lived in a van down by the river. He was an odd duck. His accommodations were probably better than most of the rest of us, though.

  21. Pope Jimbo

    Dammit Trump! Stop doing things that I like! . You are making it hard to quit you.

    When Cathy Stepp became head of the Wisconsin Department of Natural Resources in 2010, Gov. Scott Walker said she’d bring a “Chamber of Commerce mentality” to the job.

    By the time she left the DNR late last year, critics say Stepp, a home builder by trade, left Wisconsin’s DNR “in tatters” following a tenure that included declines in environmental enforcement actions, increased fees for state parks, cuts to the agency’s science personnel and two incidents of federal authorities intervening after manure from dairy farms began to contaminate drinking water in the northeastern part of the state.

    Now, she’s in a bigger job, leading the Environmental Protection Agency regional office that oversees Minnesota, Illinois, Indiana, Michigan, Ohio, Wisconsin and 35 tribes.

    So she fined people less, reduced the number of people on the Wisconsin payroll and made those mooching campers pay for their fun. What a monster!

    Anyone who urinates off the president of the Sierra Club is all right with me.

  22. Pope Jimbo

    The horror of lunch shaming!

    I don’t even know where to begin with this. Pay your fucking bills you mooches. It is all YOUR fault. It is not the school’s fault that one of your mooch kids used his “free lunch” account to buy even more food, or that you didn’t see the email warning your that your account was in arrears or that your busybody grandma can’t throw you a few dollars to tide things over.

    GAH!

    1. Bobarian LMD

      How about you don’t run a joint account between brother and sister?

    2. Pope Jimbo

      She got the news when her daughter, who’s a single mother, called her to vent. Technically, her children qualify for free-and-reduced-price lunches. But apparently her son had used up funds in their joint account sooner than expected by purchasing some a la carte food items.

      Becker says the school’s flawed lunch account system was to blame — not her grandchildren. Her granddaughter was devastated by the experience, Beckers says, adding she didn’t even want to get a meal the next day.

      “My grandson is 15. He can rack up a pretty good bill in one day,” Becker explained, noting that last year his mother noticed he was adding too many extra items to his lunch tray and asked lunch staff to prevent this from happening.

      Moving forward, the plan was that they should be asked to pay cash for anything extra that they wanted in the lunchroom. But the school apparently let things go unchecked in the lunchroom and then sent her an email notification instead. The warning got buried in her inbox and her daughter suffered the consequences.

      How dare the school not properly discipline her children! What is a parent supposed to do?

  23. SDF-7

    Let’s hope Sloopy isn’t there. Reports of shooter at YouTube Campus.

    1. The Last American Hero

      Unpossible. YouTube banned the guns.

  24. Juvenile Bluster

    Active Shooter at YouTube HQ

    Everyone, to your takes. I wish you luck in yours becoming the correct one. I’ll be sitting this one out.

    1. Winston

      Great.

      1. Winston

        Sarcasm by the way.

    2. Heroic Mulatto

      I, for one, blame the Jews.

        1. Heroic Mulatto

          It’s Elijah, all hopped up on the millions of glasses of Manischewitz he’s drunk this week.

    3. It’s (((them))).

    4. Yusef drives a Kia

      Amish, always bet on the Amish

    5. jesse.in.mb

      Dennis Prager

    6. grrizzly

      The NRA has blood on their hands.

      1. But Enough About Me

        That’s just combustion residue.

    7. It’s so weird, why didn’t there campus weapons policy prevent this?

    8. Mustang

      I laughed for some reason.

      I’ll see you all in Hell.

      1. Dr. Fronkensteen

        I’ll save you a seat at the bar.

    9. Rebel Scum

      Over/under on the building being a “gun-free” zone?

      1. Dr. Fronkensteen

        No Bet.

    10. DOOMco

      Stupidvideos.com owner?

    11. JaimeRoberto

      Is this what comes after the March Madness Pick’em? What do we call it, April Anguish?

    12. juris imprudent

      Amazingly enough there is no video of this on YouTube.

    13. “Zuckerberg San Francisco General Hospital,”

      Really?

  25. Chipping Pioneer

    I found out today that a male friend of mine from high school is now a female friend of mine from high school. Not a close friend, but a friend nonetheless. He doesn’t strike me as someone who’s doing it for attention (see: Caitlin Jenner), so I’m trying to be understanding.

    I don’t understand. Not in a way that says I don’t want to understand. I don’t understand in the same way that I don’t understand quantum physics. It seems counter-intuitive to me, but I admit that I have limited understanding, so, ¯\_(ツ)_/¯.

    A few thoughts:

    He made some comments on his Derpbook page about hormone treatments and brain chemistry. I assume that he has a penis and testes, and a Y chromosome, so that represents the physical reality. Something in his brain chemistry makes him see himself differently from that reality. It seems to me that taking hormones to transition is trying to make reality fit one’s brain chemistry, rather than trying to make one’s brain chemistry fit reality.

    He also made some comments about suffering for most of his life from depression and mental illness. As someone who can relate to this, I would think that depression and mental illness are the cause and gender confusion is the symptom, rather than vice-versa.

    1. Creosote Achilles

      Moving in the circles I do I run into lots of trans people. Many of them are bugfuck crazy. I do not know if the trans thing is a co-morbidity or completely ancillary to their crazy. Some are nice folks who are clearly in a great deal of mental distress over their feeling of being trapped in the wrong body. Some are attention whores. Others are just nasty people.

      The first group I try to treat with kindness, use their preferred name and and gender, the 2nd and 3rd groups I actively try to piss off and make even more unstable by using their ‘deadname’ and gender.

      I dunno what the right answer is. Though my personal opinion is that if your head is telling you X but physical reality is Y, then the thing to adjust is your head. I mean, if people want to pay to have their bodies modified to fit what’s in their head, go for it. Just don’t expect me to necessarily play along.

      1. Heroic Mulatto

        Some are nice folks … . Some are attention whores. Others are just nasty people.

        So just like every other group in the world?

        1. Creosote Achilles

          The groups are roughly the same. I’d argue the proportions are quite different in my experience. But that isn’t exactly scientific.

          1. Bobarian LMD

            I think most people in this group are just insane. The medical community needs to go back to stridently identifying and supporting the very small number of actual gender-dysmorphic people and the public in general should stop feeding the typical neurotic who isn’t happy with their general lot in life and decides that they’d be happier as an *other*.

            Feeding their neuroses makes us all a little crazier.

          2. People are free to be crazy in the privacy of their own nuthouse, just don’t expect me to rearrange reality to conform to your delusion.

            Due respect to polite, non-totalitarian Trannies.

          3. Heroic Mulatto

            People are free to be crazy in the privacy of their own nuthouse, just don’t expect me to rearrange reality to conform to your delusion.

            This is pretty much how I feel when people get pissed off because I won’t wish them a “Merry Christmas”.

          4. Not Adahn

            people get pissed off because I won’t wish them a “Merry Christmas”.

            Such people are engaging a practice known to anthropologists as missing the entire goddamned point.

          5. Gordilocks

            Bill O’Reilly, missing the point since forever.

  26. Pope Jimbo

    Mea Culpa to MikeS!

    Mike is visiting our wonderful city today. Starting yesterday our forecasters were warning us about a snownami. Mike asked Tundra and I to let him know if things were really bad weather-wise.

    This morning, it looked like the storm was fizzling and most of it would go south of us. The morning commute didn’t look too bad and I told Mike that. Then right around lunch we started getting a lot of snow. That is right when Mike was supposed to be getting here.

    If he lives through the storm and reads this, I just want to say one thing: Tundra made me do it! I tried to warn you, but Tundra said he’d blackball me from the ultra exclusive Maple Grove Libertarian Guild Brotherhood of Tundra chapter.

    1. I thought Mike was from NoDak, where they’re even more used to snow than Minnesota.

      1. Pope Jimbo

        Yeah, but we have a shit ton more cars to avoid while dealing with snow than Mike is used to. I sympathize with him. I worked out of my house for the last 3 years or so and now I walk to work. When I get stuck having to drive during rush hour, I am just as terrified as I was when I first moved here from the prairie.

    2. commodious spittoon

      Blackballing beats brickbatting, anyway.

    3. Bobarian LMD

      ultra exclusive Maple Grove Libertarian Guild Brotherhood of Tundra chapter.

      Sounds lonely.

      “wouldn’t want to be part any club that would have me as a member?”

      1. Mustang

        It’s not lonely, it’s Ultra Exclusive. Didn’t you read the name?

        1. Pope Jimbo

          All libertarian clubs are ultra exclusive. At least I’m guessing that they are based on their paltry numbers.

          It is just that the Maple Grove LGBT chapter is extra posh.

          1. Mustang

            I did not even catch the LGBT part. Well done.

      2. Tundra

        Pants optional. Not lonely at all!

    4. SP

      I thought you all were dissing Mike this trip anyway.

      1. Pope Jimbo

        We aren’t dissing him, we are just busy with our very active social life. Mike needs to book our time years months weeks days when he gets to the bar if he wants us to show up.

      2. MikeS

        Thank you SP. Yes, they are all dissing me. I mean, some even went to so far as to move half way across the country to avoid me! *looking at you ‘splosives*

  27. invisible finger

    “interest rates should be increasing in a period of prosperity”

    This makes no sense to me. I blame the Fed for making people afraid of reality.

    Interest rate is a price – the price of risk. If risk is high, the interest rate should reflect that risk.

    If I loan someone $5,000 and the risk of them not paying me back is high, I charge 8% interest. If the risk of not being paid back is low, I charge 4% interest.

    In a period of prosperity, the risk is low and REAL interest rates will reflect that. This is common sense to EVERY money lender except a central bank.

    1. Bobarian LMD

      If interest rates have been artificially suppressed for many years, the risk becomes exceedingly high that the dollar you loan today will be worth a nickel when you get it back.

    2. Brett L

      In a period of prosperity, the risk is low and REAL interest rates will reflect that. This is common sense to EVERY money lender except a central bank.

      Sorry, I spoke glibly. To be more precise, I believe the Fed’s interest rate is still at least 4% below where the REAL floor rate should be. Again, there shouldn’t be a Fed, but if a huge private consortium of banks and lenders agreed to publish the overnight rate they lend to each other, it would more likely be 4.5% than 0.5% in an unsubsidized world. I would argue the cost of having the interest rate too low was at least the cost of TARP plus the unemployment benefits extension of 2008.

    3. tarran

      One way to look at it:

      The interest rate is the price of a loan. It has supply and demand curves and a market clearing value.

      So, the price you, an individual, might charge other individuals will vary according to how risky you perceive them to be.

      However, the cheapest loan that person can find (i.e. the one with the lowest interest rate/most desirable terms) will be dependent on how much money people are willing to offer to loan and how much interest they want to charge.

      During recessions, people tend to want to maintain high savings in order to tide them through the tough times. This leads to higher interest rates (the production curve shifts upward). More people also want to borrow money if they are out of savings. That also drives up interest rates (the demand curve shifts rightward).

      From a misesian perspective, the contraction of a recession is generally the product of the central bank mis-setting the interest rate for overnight loans to one that differs from the market clearing price, and setting it too low. When it is set low, it encourages more borrowing than there are savings to support (and they effectively and indirectly print the money to make up the shortfall), and leads to capital investments that appear falsely to be supported by consumer demand but which will not be profitable in actuality.

      Since this expansion looks like prosperity and the contraction looks like its opposite, the instinct of the finance people is to lower the commanded interest rate further. The problem is that the contraction is required to free up resources being used uneconomically to support production that is not desired by consumers, so that they can be repurposed towards production that is sustainable. Consequently, the powers that be are just kicking the can down the road and allowing this misallocation to get worse and bigger.

      Some recognize this, and hope to, by increasing interest rates, make the commanded interest rate more closely match the market clearing rate. They want to do that in a period of prosperity because they fear that doing it in a recession will make the recession deeper. They are correct that increasing them during a recession will make the contraction larger. They are incorrect in thinking it is a bad thing.

      1. DOOMco

        Stands to applaud

      2. Economics is for fagz.

        (seriously, that was a good explanation, I learned something today)

      3. Brett L

        Some recognize this, and hope to, by increasing interest rates, make the commanded interest rate more closely match the market clearing rate. They want to do that in a period of prosperity because they fear that doing it in a recession will make the recession deeper. They are correct that increasing them during a recession will make the contraction larger. They are incorrect in thinking it is a bad thing.

        My only quibble is that I believe the price of keeping the price of money below market when the market can most bear it primarily causes the pain of recession to be rolled into government deficit spending, further distorting the economy and keeping the actual reckoning even further down the road. If the price of the rates being wrong is the liquidity freeze that TARP and the $1T stimulus were used to avoid, but can no longer be avoided, a lot of people who did nothing financially wrong are gonna get destroyed. That’s the immoral part to me.

  28. Suspected shooter at YouTube was female.

    https://www.cnbc.com/2018/04/03/police-on-the-scene-at-youtube-headquarters-with-reports-of-an-active-shooter-.html

    TOXIC FEMININITY!

    TW: Autoplay and early info could be crap

    1. Pan Zagloba

      Holy shit, the glass ceiling just got broken!

      Also, the glass partition and the glass door…

      1. Not Adahn

        That’s the Apple campus, not Alphabet:

        https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6D71kkzp9Sw

      2. KibbledKristen

        As usual, women are erased from mass shooting history!

        1. Stinky Wizzleteats

          Don’t have to go back that far, don’t forget that husband wife team from Cali who shot up their coworkers in 2015.

        2. Gordilocks

          The Ghost of Bonnie Parker would like a word.

          1. KibbledKristen

            See? Women invented mass shootings!

          2. Pan Zagloba

            I bet they only get seven bullets for every ten men get, too!

          3. But Enough About Me

            Yeah, but since their fine motor skills are better than mens’, their raw hit rate is higher.

            WIMMIN SNIPERZ RULE!!!!111!1!

    2. Gordilocks

      Good thing Damore was fired when he was.

    3. Juvenile Bluster

      Further:

      One dead, “several’ injured
      Police think it’s either domestic violence or disgruntled employee.

  29. Viking1865
    1. Stinky Wizzleteats

      That thread gave me cancer.

    2. Pajamaboy account.

    3. Heroic Mulatto

      I bet every single one of those cops had a boner.

      1. Gordilocks

        Fold, you win.

  30. Juvenile Bluster

    HOT TAKES! GET YOUR HOT TAKES HERE!

    Michael Ian Black
    ‏Verified account @michaelianblack

    Michael Ian Black Retweeted Stephanie McNeal

    Another shooting.
    I’m going to politicize the fuck out of it, and so should you.
    The NRA is a terrorist organization.

    neontaster
    ?
    ‏ @neontaster
    35m35 minutes ago
    Replying to @michaelianblack

    Your mom is a terrorist organization.

    burn!

    1. jesse.in.mb

      I too miss the early ’00s.

    2. Gordilocks

      Is Michael Ian Black the real name of Winston?

      1. Bobarian LMD

        Michael Ian Black is literally Winston’s Mom.

      2. Winston

        You are calling me a gun-grabber. Seriously?

        1. Gordilocks

          LOL. WOOOOOOOSSSSSHHHHHHHHH

          1. Winston

            Say Hi to Rachel for me.

          2. Gordilocks

            ?

          3. Winston

            Aren’t you from Alberta?

          4. Winston

            Or living there

          5. Gordilocks

            Nope. Spent alot of time there in the past, but not from there.

            And even if I was, why would I say hi to the premier; especially a Dipper?

          6. Winston

            And even if I was, why would I say hi to the premier; especially a Dipper?

            Says the guy who said I was Michael Ian Black. What did I do to deserve getting compared to the guy who wrote Run, Fatboy, Run? 😛

          7. Gordilocks

            Again, WOOOOOOOSSSHHHHHHHH

            I’ll give you one more try to get the joke, Winston, and that’s it. More tries than I would give one of your relatives, yeah?

          8. Winston

            Your Juvenile “joke” did not go over my head.

          9. Mad Scientist

            Yes, clearly you got it the first time and just feigned confusion for funsies.

          10. Winston

            Yes, clearly you got it the first time and just feigned confusion for funsies.

            Yeah actually you are right. Getting compared to Michael Ian Black is just fighting words. 😛

          11. Winston

            I mean the literal oldest joke in the book versus getting compared to a guy who was in the Smosh movie. Ugh. 😉

      3. I thought Michael Hihn was the real name of Winston.

        1. Winston

          I don’t support gun control while he does so that is false. Nor do I go on crazy tirades about goober aggressor bullies.

          1. Floridaman

            Very well, you might not be Hihn but you are most definitely tulpa.

          2. Winston

            you are most definitely tulpa.

            Can’t tell if serious.

          3. Sean

            We are all Tulpa.

          4. Raven Nation

            I saw your last post about Discord on the previous thread. I don’t have access to the account stuff – I’m just a sometime user.

            Sorry.

          5. Floridaman

            No problem.

          6. Raven Nation

            See Viking1865 down below around 7pm

        2. Winston

          Also I have interacted with that nutjob before. I said he couldn’t be Hihn but must be Mary since his facebook account shows he liked the Pauls despite his attacks on him. However he then edited his account to erase the Pauls from his favorites. So I was wrong.

  31. KibbledKristen

    Kyle Kashuv release unhinged Tweeter DMs between himself & Eichenwald.

    So, I totally believe that Eichenwald consulted a shrink, that shrink told him he was batshit insane, and Kurt reported it as the shrink saying Kyle was the cuckoo one.

    1. Stinky Wizzleteats

      I’m starting to think Michael Hinn and Eichenwald are the same guy.

      1. Winston

        Goober!

    2. tarran

      Kyle Kashuv shows great maturity…. Except for being on twitter. Twitter is stupid.

      1. Twitter is the internet’s bathroom stall scrawlings.

        1. Gordilocks

          Digital Truck Stop Poetry

        2. DOOMco

          Huh, there are a bunch of #’s there, too.

        3. Mad Scientist

          It’s high-school cafeteria gossip. It’s about the least interesting thing on the internet.

          1. jesse.in.mb

            You don’t find this fascinating?

          2. Gordilocks

            What if Jeff Bezos bought Twitter a woodchipper with the change in his pocket and shut Trump’s account put me through it?

          3. Mad Scientist

            Nope. He’s a complete jackass. I don’t need him to prove it to me again and again.

      2. Meh, Twitter is what you want it to be, I follow some musicians and authors and artists I like, it’s nice to know when new things are coming out, and there are a handful of genuinely funny accounts, Iowahawk, etc….

      3. KibbledKristen

        Twitter is way better than Facebook. Twitter is my own little echo chamber, where I get to read pithy shit from some really interesting libertarian thinkers and pundits.

  32. Gordilocks

    Prediction –

    Slate, Salon, Everyday Feminism, or any of the other places our hero Derpetologist digs up the derp for us, will provide a hot take that looks like this –

    ‘To her, it was a penis, and her act a retributive rape and impregnation by leaden spermatazoa of a male dominated platform for predatory objectification’

    1. So it was pegging projection?

    2. Dr. Fronkensteen

      Who are you, who are so wise in the ways of science?

    3. But Enough About Me

      There’s a few hundred craptacular Masters theses buried in there somewhere . . .

    4. AlmightyJB

      Was there some story that prompted this or is this a random musing on the ways of derp?

      1. Gordilocks

        Almighty –

        The YouTube shooter being female.

        1. AlmightyJB

          Ah. I’m slow:).

    5. Derpetologist

      [sensible chuckle]

      You know me too well.

  33. AlmightyJB

    The Social Security Card ID is a racist ploy to keep undocumented Americans from Voting. / NY and CA and DNC.

    1. They’re suing to get the citizenship question stricken from the next Census.

  34. KibbledKristen

    Goody.

    Just had my dad tell me I was emotional (like, heartbroken) because the squeeze’s things were still in my house. He said he saw a post on Facebook of me asking for funny gifs because I was feeling anxious. I explained I was anxious, not emotional, because I was in fear for my personal safety in my house because this woman kept calling me over and over and over. He then asked what good would gifs do for my personal safety. I said “funny gifs are distracting and make me feel better.” He said “Ok, yeah, sure. Whatever.”

    What the fuck?

    1. AlmightyJB

      You get the psycho bitch problem resolved?

      1. KibbledKristen

        I think so. My boss and colleagues said I should text her and say that I received her info and do not contact me further. So I did, and she essentially said “OK”.

        1. AlmightyJB

          Well make sure you give her name and as much info about her as you can to everyone you know. Forward them any text or emails you received and save any voice mails. Don’t hesitate to file a police report or for a restraining order if you hear from her again. She should be made aware that if something bad ever happened to you that everyone would be looking at her. That’s sufficient deterrence for most people.

          1. KibbledKristen

            Good tips. I screen-shotted the text exchange so I have proof she agreed to leave me alone. I think the message she sent me on Facebook is still there, so I have her name.

          2. Number.6

            Any messages anyone sent anyone are still there. Including the deleted ones.

    2. Mr Lizard

      So do we send Brutals to put your dad on the grain line or send them to cleanse the woman on the phone?

    3. KibbledKristen

      Pro tip: don’t explain people’s feelings to them.

      1. AlmightyJB

        You sound like you’re feeling miffed. I keed!

        1. KibbledKristen

          Miffed? Definitely! Pissed off? YEP!

          Weepy and heartbroken? LOL. No.

    4. Waterfall Insurance

      The best I could do on short notice. Old reliable. https://giphy.com/gifs/wow-shocked-hillary-clinton-l3fQjHugtGrGhHs5y

      1. KibbledKristen

        I LOLed

      2. AlmightyJB

        That looks like the donkey from Hee Haw.

        1. Mad Scientist

          No, no, that’s Bill Clinton’s wife.

    5. Tulip

      So sorry about the squeeze and the psycho Kristen.

      1. KibbledKristen

        Thanks, pal!

  35. Winston

    The dead lady shooter is said to have been wearing a head scarf. Speculate away!

    1. Deplorableme

      Bad hair day?

    2. Number.6

      Sounds like a Roma.

      ::hides::

    3. Gordilocks

      YOU WILL REMOVE ALL VIDEOS FEATURING CHRISTOPHER HITCHENS!

      /nun

      1. Pan Zagloba

        “Mother Theresa will see you in Hell…from Heaven!”

    4. Waterfall Insurance

      4th doctor cosplay.

      1. Sean

        Obligatory applause

    5. DOOMco

      Did YouTube not have a banner for ____ cancer month?

      I’m going to hell. I’m sorry.

      1. Dr. Fronkensteen

        I’ll save you a seat at the bar as well. How many reservations do I have to make though?

          1. Gordilocks

            That’s where all the good music is gonna be.

            – Bill Hicks

    6. AlmightyJB

      I saw one report where she was after her boyfriend but who knows at this point. Prolly not gonna help the 420 situation.

    7. Waterfall Insurance

      It’s at YouTube. It might be a Harry Potter scarf.

  36. l0b0t

    Hey Gordilocks. On our trip down 95 we paused at a truck stop in Dumfries, VA. Place was AMAZING! There were 2 full size rigs inside on giant rotating platforms advertising the custom truck shop, just about any electric appliance one could imagine, converted to 12 volt, a 1946 Dodge Power Wagon, great coffee and all the tchotchkes one could ever want.

    1. DOOMco

      I would love a power wagon like that.

      1. l0b0t

        My youthful love of Simon & Simont has instilled an appreciation for them as well. Honestly, it almost made me tumescent. Fully restored, lifted, winch on the front, giant running boards; it was beautiful.

          1. l0b0t

            I pine for bumper like that every time I have drive into Manhattan.

          2. Mad Scientist
          3. Raven Nation
    2. Gordilocks

      Glad you enjoyed.

      My favourite truck stop was somewhere along the coast road between Carnarvon and Karratha, nothing there but a couple of rubbish bins; but a great place to light a fire and have a few beers under many trillions of stars and no one around for hundreds of kilometers.

      That, and portage 49 at the north end of Mackay Lake.

      /holier than thou trucker

      1. Truckier than thou?

  37. Derpetologist

    mental sandbox time- odds and ends

    If you are trying to find a bunch of rebels hiding in the jungle or mountains, it makes more sense to send a small force than a large force. A large force makes a lot of noise and gives the enemy a chance to run away or hide. A small force is much quieter and more alert. They know their small size makes them vulnerable, so they try harder to be quiet and pay attention.

    The US approach to warfare in general is to adopt new technology instead of new tactics. For example, instead of finding an alternative to road travel, the push is for vehicles which have more armor to withstand bombs.

    In counterinsurgency, there are many advantages to operating at night, especially when the enemy lacks night vision equipment. Night movement and fighting should be a training priority.

    Since counterinsurgency differs greatly from conventional fighting, it might makes sense to have a dedicated unit or branch for it. This was the original idea behind the Green Berets, but the implementation has been mediocre.

    It would make much more sense to train troops in helicopter assault rather than airborne. Helicopters can do everything airborne does and more, and with greater precision and less risk.

    The first step of counterinsurgency should be to find, train, arm, and support friendly locals. It is the locals who must take the lead in combat.

    Progress should be measured in terms of local support rather than enemy losses.

    today I learned

    ***
    After the U.S. forces in and around the island of Luzon surrendered in May 1942, Fertig decided not to give himself up to the Japanese. When another fleeing officer accompanying him asked what they were going to do, Fertig replied, “Any damn thing but surrender.”

    During his movement from Corregidor to Mindanao, Fertig survived or avoided a number of airplane crashes.[13] As a result, he felt that he was destined for something special. Later, after organizing the guerrilla forces on Mindanao, he wrote in this diary,

    I am called on to lead a resistance movement against an implacable enemy under conditions that make victory barely possible even under the best circumstances. But I feel that I am indeed a Man of Destiny, that my course is charted and that only success lies at the end of the trail. I do not envision failure; it is obvious that the odds are against us and we will not consistently win, but if we are to win only part of the time and gain a little each time, in the end we will be successful.[14]
    ***

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wendell_Fertig

    1. Dr. Fronkensteen

      I still say we should have had circuit judges in Afghanistan. Protecting them would be one thing but I’m not sure how you protect the people who would avail themselves of this legal system. I was thinking this when I saw a documentary in which the Taliban had what were in effect circuit judges traveling on motorcycles to dispense their brand of law and order. I wish I could remember the name of the documentary.

    2. The first step of counterinsurgency should be to find, train, arm, and support friendly locals. It is the locals who must take the lead in combat.

      Gosh, if there only was a part of the US Amy that did that…. maybe they could give them distinctive headwear…Green perhaps? Oh wait, you said they were mediocre.

      Or, have some sort of teams that could be embedded with local police or paramilitary or military forces… they could advise the locals – they could give them an acronym like “ETT” or such. Maybe a “MiTT”

      If only such things had ever been thought of or tried!!!!

      Oh, yeah…. I did that shit a decade ago.

      1. Did you even read further in Derpetologist’s post? :-p

      2. juris imprudent

        No, no, no, we gut some infantry units and call them SFABs.

      3. Derpetologist

        I know it has been tried, at least on some level, but the results have not been encouraging. We’ve spent more money training and equipping the Afghan air force (about $800 million in 2017 alone) than on foreign internal defense.

        My understanding is the first SF guys in Afghanistan were there to direct airstrikes, not train, etc. I don’t know what else they or later groups did.

        To backtrack a bit, Afghanistan is about twice the size of Malaysia. And the insurgency there (1948-1960) had about twice as many guys as the Taliban does now.

        What I’m getting at is a war like this has been won before.

        It’s frustrating to see the same mistake being made: the attempt to turn another country’s military into a carbon-copy of the US military.

        Feel free to take what I say with several tons of salt. I’ve never been over there.

        1. My understanding is the first SF guys in Afghanistan were there to direct airstrikes, not train, etc. I don’t know what else they or later groups did.

          We have done plenty of training – the ETTs were with ANP and ANA. We have schools set up – the one just north of Kabul was fairly decent sized. We are not trying to run ANA Kandaks into US Army like units – anymore than we tried to turn IA units into US Army look-a-likes.

          Believe it or not, we all read history too – even had to write about it at CGSOC, CASSS, War College, etc.

          The Iraqis got really good and cleared the country out – then hollowed out their force, politicized the commands and stole or diverted resources and effort. Here comes ISIS….

          The Afghans have some good units, some not so good – and they have no national unity, no economy or industrial base or infrastructure to maintain a force, and a tendency to steal the shit out of every stray nickle that rolls along, because they are sure everything is going to go to shit and they will have to bolt.

          You can have all these great ideas, but with nothing to implement them with….you are pissing into the wind.

          Go back to the last post I did on Afghanistan – there are several nuggets in there for ya.

          1. Derpetologist

            I don’t know if I read the right one. It was the one from September about Afghanistan flirting with India to tweak Pakistan.

            I do know that about half the $76 billion that the US has given in military aid to Afghanistan has been stolen- with weapons, ammo, and equipment ending up on the black market.

            If there was an easy answer, someone would have found it already.

            I think part of the answer is to not give out so much money so quickly. The focus should be on people, not stuff.

        2. Malaysia is 50% Malay, 40% Chinese and 10% Indian (mostly Tamil) – maybe %s a little different vs. Singapore, but whatever. Either way, it was a mostly developed UK colony pre-WWII with real civil society, limited Islam, etc. Very different from Afghanistan, etc.

    3. mikey

      Maybe we just stay out of such places.

      1. Derpetologist

        +1 Weinberger doctrine

        Alternatively, pay the British to do counterinsurgency. They seem to know it better.

        1. Number.6

          Used to know counterinsurgency better.

          British counterinsurgency skills look more like Northern Ireland than Malaya.

          1. You REALLY don’t want to know what I think of how they did in Iraq….

          2. Number.6

            I know a fair amount about the fuckups in Basra.

            Overall, despite being British, the whole ‘Military Superiority’ myth needs to die.

          3. Yeah…then I need not repeat anything, as that was where I ended up, when the doo doo hit the whirling metal blades.

          4. Number.6

            You know, the British (Army, particularly) has been smelling its own farts re: Malaya ever since , well, since Malaya. Their CI efforts in Yugoslavia were not great, but a generous observer might say they were better as a component of UNPROFOR than the other contingent groups, but really, they did nothing to distinguish themselves, because their brief was so scant.

            The biggest problem with the British military in the Middle East is the legacy of Lawrence of Arabia and the British Foreign Office’s historical Arabist bias. “Oh, Johnny Egyptian is no problem, we understand those wallahs“, which pervades not only foreign policy, but war planning, logistics and tactics. Basra was the perfect storm of this thinking, and it’s utterly understandable that the British forces were only told of the Charge of the Knights at the very last moment, where all that was expected of them was to stay out of the battle. Andrew Stewart was – just to put icing on the cake – possibly the least qualified General on staff to be given that position, having had no combat command on his resume to that date.

            I could go on, but there’d be no effective defense I could give against Swissy’s onslaught. Basra was a pivotal moment in the so-called Special Relationship.

          5. Winston

            Gas? / Churchill

    4. Mustang

      Yeah, I don’t mean to be rude Derp, but we’ve been doing exactly that for decades across multiple services and countries, each with different approaches and they are constantly re-evaluating their tactics. Yes, we like technology, but the idea that the people on the ground are just going to keep using the same route while waiting for armor is…a bit naive. We changed routes multiple times a day based on intel. It’s just basic patrol tactics. Technology takes years to implement. In the meantime, everyone from your basic grunt all the way up through the four stars are continuously re-evaluating tactics.

      Even the pampered Air Force rubes like me know and use the advantages of night vision.

      Helicopter assaults have been used with varying degrees of success and failure since…Vietnam?

      Sorry Derp, but you may want to find some doctrine papers from the past couple decades to browse through if you’re looking for mental sandbox material.

      1. Derpetologist

        It’s an interesting pattern:

        -criticisms/suggestions are made
        -those criticized say they are already implementing the suggestions and acting on the criticisms
        -the quagmire continues
        -meanwhile, oodles of money get spent on exotic and unlikely to be used weapons like the F-35

        The US focuses on conventional warfare and excels at it. Unconventional warfare has been a sideshow and the results are lackluster.

        I read that JFK had to put a lot of pressure on the Army to get them on board with the Green Berets. The top brass at the time were obsessed with firepower and maneuver. I don’t think much has changed.

        The only real concrete suggestion I have is that I think it is a mistake to fund Afghanistan’s air force. They will never be able to sustain it without US help.

        1. Right – we have never improved, adapted….only made excuses…and remained static. Also, there is no Center For Army Lessons Learned. usacac.army.mil/organizations/mccoe/call

          The Command & General Staff Officer School, War College and Sargent Major’s Academy have the same lessons as 50 years ago…

          Might want to tamp down the sweeping generalizations just a wee bit.

          1. Mustang

            You can walk into any clothing sales shop and find bookshelves full of the lessons learned.

          2. Don Escaped Texas

            Everything has seemed to have changed substantially and for the better in the past 54 years………except:
            * the notion of politicians that we need never miss a chance to get busy on the ground in Asia
            * and the indifference of voters that this is just totally cool since my kid has a zero risk for conscription.

            I’m not an expert and ain’t gunning for anyone here philosophically, but I really only have two sorts of reactions to proposed foreign endeavors: a) carpet bomb their military and infrastructure until capitulation and satisfaction are achieved, collateral damage being a sad but normal part of these things, or b) meh, leave those folks alone.

          3. Derpetologist

            “we have never improved, adapted….only made excuses…and remained static.”

            I didn’t say that; I did say the results suck, in that we haven’t won yet.

            There are ways to improve; some just haven’t been tried yet. The continuation of large scale airborne training is a good example of a bad idea with an easy fix.

            I keep meeting guys who went airborne who end up with busted knees and backs. And all to acquire a skill that has virtually no relevance in wars we have been fighting. If it’s all about a macho morale boost, it would be cheaper and safer just to have firewalking seminars.

            I’d much rather do a night land nav course than sit through a bunch of PowerPoint fluff, which constitutes a large share of “training” these days.

            How is it that soldiers take classes every year on everything from opsec to sexual assault, but none on how to spot an IED, the number one cause of casualties in recent years?

            There’s just a lot of things that don’t make any sense.

          4. Mustang

            Welcome to the party. Those exact complaints come up in nearly every survey, discussion, call for suggestions that ever occurs. Not saying it’s right but it won’t be changing anytime soon and I agree that it is a terrible way to do business. I have serious concerns about our ability to actually defend the US because of it.

          5. Number.6

            The problem is, of course, that the military organizations of all Western countries are going thru’ an existential crisis. The societies in which they find themselves – even more than in Kipling’s time – are loyal inasmuch as they ostensibly honor the warrior spirit, but find the whole idea of having rough men doing dirty jobs more than a little distasteful.

            The next generation of those rough men, come from the very society that disdains those qualities, and there’s an understandable tension there – just how ‘rough’ do these men have to be? The fact is, of course, that these are two separate and compatible facets of individuals, but the image is hard to maintain, and with at times, a very large volunteer military, there’s the danger that a sizeable proportion of the personnel aren’t able to maintain both facets. Instead of kicking such individuals out on their ass, the military seeks to thread the needle, and end up with serious programs that make the military look like the Elks, but less threatening.

            As I noted, this isn’t a problem solely of the US Military. There’s a cultural thrust to make the military look un-threatening and ‘inclusive’ like firemen and doctors – and giving out participation certificates to spouses is a classic example. How many service members think this is a net positive, if you asked them without their partners being in hearing distance? The ones who think it is a good idea are likely to be the ones you want to be on the ‘out’ track when an ‘up or out’ question is asked.

          6. Mustang

            Well put.

          7. Gustave Lytton

            How else are you gonna earn that elusive AATW for your email signature?

          8. juris imprudent

            I didn’t say that; I did say the results suck, in that we haven’t won yet.

            Ah, there it is – THE problem. How would we know we won?

          9. Mustang

            Yeah, if someone could have defined that a decade ago I’m pretty confident we’d be out of there already, which is why I say it’s all political. The decision makers don’t want to leave. It’s a great place to test weapons and line the pockets of politicians. Looks good on the generals’ records too.

          10. juris imprudent

            Center For Army Lessons Learned

            Ah, yes, as the retired Warrant put it to me: the reason the Army keeps lessons learned is to see how many times they can make the same mistake.

            I will tell you the bigger problem in the Army – the culture of can do. Where the fuck are the 4-stars telling the politicians “that is a really fucking stupid idea”?

        2. Mustang

          I’m not saying don’t criticize stuff, just that you might want to look at what has been tried already.

          Unconventional ops are not lackluster or a sideshow. We have an entire command dedicated to it (spec ops). Having worked with them, entire theaters shift to get them into the fight the way that they want. A huge portion of my job is figuring out how to use and defeat unconventional tactics.

          What you are seeing is the current superpower learning the lesson that every other superpower has learned about Central Asia and Afghanistan specifically…it’s unconquerable. It’s just not going to happen, but also having witnessed the politics behind some of it, it has very little to do with actually wanting to win, whatever that means.

          Again, have at the criticism, but don’t get put out when someone else has already been there and done that.

          1. We created the SFAB because after 18 years, Army has realized you can’t get blood from a SF stone and a lot (not all) of the missions have evolved to the point where well-trained, experienced, line NCOs and field grades can get the same results.

          2. Mustang

            There are similar units in the Air Force whose sole purpose is to train other nations on air base defense, air strikes, and whatever else.

          3. juris imprudent

            We created SFABs because we are still convinced that we can build a nation to suit us. That has to fucking stop.

  38. Derpetologist

    When Failure Thrives- harsh criticism of airborne operations
    https://usacac.army.mil/sites/default/files/documents/cace/CSI/CSIPubs/WhenFailureThrives.pdf

    gist

    almost every airborne operation was either a clusterfuck or a Pyrrhic victory. Airborne training is good publicity and boosts morale, so it continues. It makes about as much sense as horse cavalry.

    1. l0b0t

      Thanks for sharing this, I’ll be tucking into bed with it tonight. It looks fascinating.

      1. Derpetologist

        I serve the people of the United States and live the Army Values.

        [gives Benny Hill salute]

    2. Viking1865

      “almost every airborne operation was either a clusterfuck”

      War is inherently a clusterfuck. The victor is the one who can best navigate the chaos.

      1. Derpetologist

        Some operations are riskier than others though. Airborne operation casualty rates are often 2 or 3 times higher than regular ones.

        To make an analogy: there’s a big difference in risk between taking a pot shot from 500 yards and charging with a bayonet.

        1. Viking1865

          So are amphibious operations. But sometimes, they need to be done.

    3. Raven Nation

      I remember seeing a piece of a documentary on airborne troops in WWII. As I remember the explanation, one of the experts argued that paratroopers should normally expect high casualty rates (50%+). But when the Germans used paratroopers in Belgium & Holland they succeeded with remarkably light casualties that Hitler took to be the norm. So when they jumped on Crete and suffered much higher casualties, despite achieving their objective, Hitler decided that they were no longer effective and basically shelved them for the rest of the war.

      1. Derpetologist

        The only successful airborne operations have been against weak (Panama, Grenada, Iraq) or neutral (Belgium) opponents. Every other one has been a meat grinder.

        1. Number.6

          Well, certainly British military doctrine has always been that airborne is an important component of combined ops and should be considered as a standalone solution only in extremis.

          Operation Market Garden was the only lesson they needed, and I understand that even then, the War Office was decidedly unconvinced that it was a good idea, and as we found out, audacity isn’t enough.

  39. Brian

    I hate stories like “Zombie Raccoons!” because, God damnit, I want a picture of a zombie raccoon. If you don’t have a picture of zombie raccoon, go home.

    1. Winston

      https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/theworldpost/wp/2018/04/02/xi-term-limits/?utm_term=.82e93a3137fc

      Formally unifying these two positions at the very top will transform the entire Chinese governance structure by institutionally fusing the party and the state. This reform is good for China simply because the party has developed into the most competent national political institution in the world today.

      Subscribe
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      The WorldPost Opinion
      Why Xi’s lifting of term limits is a good thing
      By Eric X. Li
      April 2 at 1:14 PM

      A woman selects a souvenir necklace with a portrait of Chinese President Xi Jinping at a stall in Tiananmen Square in Beijing, China. Feb. 26, 2018. (Thomas Peter/Reuters)

      Eric X. Li is a Shanghai venture capitalist and a trustee and chairman of the advisory committee of Fudan University’s China Institute.

      SHANGHAI — Western media and the Chinese chattering classes have been in an uproar since China’s National People’s Congress approved constitutional changes that included lifting the two-term presidential limit. China approves “president for life,” proclaimed Western media.

      But this misinterprets the nature of the development. And the world appears to be overlooking consequential political reforms taking place in China that will impact our collective future for the better.

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      The presidential term limit has no bearing on how long a top Chinese leader can stay in power and lifting it by no means allows anyone to rule for life. In fact, the position of real power — the general secretary of the Chinese Communist Party Central Committee — has never had term limits. The most recent draft of China’s constitution, written in 1982, set the presidency as a symbolic head of state, with no actual power. Although the two offices happened to have been occupied by the same person for more than 25 years since Jiang Zemin, the institutional mechanics of the offices are rather separate.

      Formally unifying these two positions at the very top will transform the entire Chinese governance structure by institutionally fusing the party and the state. This reform is good for China simply because the party has developed into the most competent national political institution in the world today.

      As to the issue of lifetime rule, the party does have institutional mechanisms, both mandatory and customary, that govern officials’ retirement. In fact, the party constitution specifically states that no position has lifetime tenure. This system has been developed over decades and covers the many tiers of the party’s organizational structure, from the Politburo to ministerial and provincial positions. Within this framework, it is possible for Xi to lead the country for longer than his recent predecessors. But not for life.

      Age limits have varied over time and differ based on position. The custom for most senior leaders in recent years has been to retire at the age of 68, which is often extended to complete a term. Exceptions have been made for the position of general secretary (one served, successfully, through his late 70’s). But still, it’s always finite.

      However, eliminating the presidential term limit is still significant. It is part and parcel of highly consequential and, in my view, constructive political reforms. These reforms were set in motion at the 18th party congress held in 2012 and were a particular focus at the third plenum in 2013. I wrote then that the fusing of party and state would be the most far-reaching political transformation in Chinese governance. The completion of the current constitutional reform is the culmination of that process.

      Since the founding of the People’s Republic in 1949, the leadership of the party has been central to China’s political DNA. However, institutionally the system has gone through significant growing pains. At first, China adopted the Soviet system that separated, at least on the institutional level, the party and government. The top organs — the party central committee, the National People’s Congress and the state council were parallel. But in reality, the party led everything. This produced significant conflicts that some have blamed as partially responsible for the disastrous Cultural Revolution.

      When former Chinese leader Deng Xiaoping began his reforms over 40 years ago, he pushed a policy of administrative separation between party and government. But that was due to the particular circumstances of post-Cultural Revolution China. At the time, many senior leaders who were purged by Mao Zedong were rehabilitated and returned to their previous positions.

      The party was just emerging from a period of upheaval, and those officials all came from the era of the centrally planned economy. China needed market economics. Deng’s policy unleashed younger and more forward-looking governing forces to execute the reform agenda. But more importantly, he also focused great energy on rebuilding the party institution.

      In the following decades, the party has developed into one of the most elaborate and effective governing institutions in the world and, I would argue, in history. It is responsible for achieving what’s known as the greatest improvement in standard of living for the largest number of people in the shortest amount of time.

      The party has now stepped forward to the front and center of Chinese governance. This constitutional reform further enshrines the party’s political centrality by extending the wording of party leadership from the preamble to the body of the constitution. At the governing level, the reform creates a super agency, the National Supervisory Commission, to combat corruption. It is an extension of the party’s Central Disciplinary and Inspection Commission and will further institutionalize the tremendous anti-corruption drive executed by the party commission over the past five years.

      It is in this context that the removal of a presidential term limit is so significant. While the party’s leadership has always been politically paramount, the administrative separation of party and government has produced institutional contradictions and confusion. As China increasingly becomes a major power in the world, the office of the president has assumed greater importance, especially in China’s interactions with the rest of the world.

      Bringing the presidency’s institutional mechanics in line with the office of party general secretary, and for them to be occupied by the same person, will create a more efficient and coherent governing structure and more transparency and predictability in China’s dealings with the world. It lifts the veil of pretense that, somehow, the party and state governance are not one, which is untrue and wholly unnecessary and counterproductive at this stage of China’s development. It signals the maturing of the Chinese political system that shows the world clearly how decisions are made and who is in charge.

      The current Chinese system is a good combination of principle and flexibility. The principle of no lifetime tenure, combined with collective leadership and retirement rules, prevent unchecked rule for life by the wrong person. But a degree of flexibility in the retirement mechanism allows the right leader to govern longer. Xi will retire someday. But as long as he continues to lead successfully, that day will be a long way off.

      I dare say that Xi has done more for China in five years than Bill Clinton, George Bush and Barack Obama combined did for the United States in 25 years. On the watches of those three American leaders, with slow and incompetent reforms and major catastrophes such as the Iraq War and the financial crisis, the U.S. managed to squander what was arguably the greatest advantage any nation ever had in history at the end of the Cold War and is now mired in dysfunction and losing its leadership position in the world. Meanwhile, opinion surveys, such as this one by the Harvard Kennedy School, show Xi consistently receiving the highest domestic approval ratings of any world leader.

      It would be a mistake to judge that Xi is putting himself above the party and the nation. On the contrary, a major theme of his governing philosophy has been the centrality of the party as an institution. And in today’s China, both society and the party are much more robust and pluralistic than the time when Deng came to power.

      ….

      Xi is now beginning his second term. No one knows for sure how long he will serve. But with his impressivelife track record, it is understandable that there are genuine sentiments for him to lead China for a long time. Sadly, liberal democracy in its current state seems incapable of producing a leader half as good.

      Shorter WaPo: TOP MEN

      I guess Democracy dying ain’t so bad after all.

      1. Winston

        Oops that wasn’t supposed to be a reply. And I quoted too much. But then again you don’t have to go to their site then… :shrug:

        1. Yeah…we’d rather you not paste an entire piece like that…for many reasons, OK?

          1. Winston

            Sorry. Can you get into legal trouble for quoting an entire piece?

        2. Rhywun

          you don’t have to go to their site then

          That was never a worry.

      2. mikey

        “Eric X. Li is a Shanghai venture capitalist and a trustee and chairman of the advisory committee of Fudan University’s China Institute.”

        I’m sure Mr Li’s views are heartfelt and he would have no problem publishing a contrary opinion.

        1. Winston

          What is Tom Friedman and Justin Trudeau’s excuses?

          1. Yusef drives a Kia

            They are morons… like you…..

          2. Winston

            Tell more about Trek’s non-didacticism…

          3. Yusef drives a Kia

            I’ll have a Toaster ask Spock

          4. Winston

            Mixing BSG and ST? For shame…

          5. Yusef drives a Kia

            Let’s ask Mal what He thinks, He’s the Captain after all

  40. Chafed

    Totally OT: California no longer permits employers to ask prospective hires about their salary history. I have two jobs I need to fill. For anyone who recently had to hire under similar conditions or who was recently hired, how and when was salary discussed during the hiring process?

    1. trshmnstr

      That’s ridiculous.

    2. Yusef drives a Kia

      when it looks like it might work out for both parties, I never heard of that law, must be new

    3. Don Escaped Texas

      Without regard to anything else, I figure what a job pays in the region, adjust for the ability and fit of the individual, and then offer them that. They take it or they don’t.

      If beating some staffer out of $10k makes all the difference, my going concern ain’t going so hot.

      1. Chafed

        That I can do well into the process. I’m trying to do this in a way that doesn’t make the position unappealing to qualified prospects or super appealing to the unqualified.

    4. Don Escaped Texas

      Without regard to anything else, I figure what a job pays in the region, adjust for the ability and fit of the individual, and then offer them that. They take it or they don’t.

      If beating some staffer out of $10k makes all the difference, my going concern ain’t going so hot.

      1. Don Escaped Texas

        What happened to that cool little Gilmore-proofing warning thingie?

    5. DOOMco

      Jesus.

    6. westernsloper

      What is the reasoning for not asking salary history? In the last year I was in desperate need for a job and they all asked salary history. Given my previous salaries I had a hard time finding a job. Nobody understood, “ya, if I could make that money I would not be asking you for a fucking job, I just need a damn job and I will do my best for you”

      1. Rhywun

        I know I’m a bit underpaid at my current job but I stay there for other reasons. If/when I have to look for another one I don’t expect to have this problem. ??

        1. westernsloper

          That’s good. When you get to a certain age and have spent most of your life in the trades it is a different story. I can’t really blame them, I am not 30 any more. Such is life.

      2. straffinrun

        I’d assume it’s so the evil kulaks can’t use it as an excuse to oppress the workers.

        1. straffinrun

          Also, imagine if we didn’t allow comparative pricing in other fields. Never mind, I forgot about some government contracts.

        2. Chafed

          Pretty close. See below.

      3. Chafed

        This is California’s brilliant attempt to eliminate the wage gap.

    1. Floridaman

      Thanks.

  41. westernsloper

    RE Trump yelling in the microphone. I have to say I am with him on Jared’s bunny suit glasses. What is up with the glasses?

    1. Rhywun

      Maybe it’s an attempt the lessen the “killer rabbit” effect that those costumes always have.

  42. KibbledKristen

    New season of Deadliest Catch!!

    1. KibbledKristen

      (of course, the Hillstrands have retired, and they were my favorite)

  43. straffinrun

    If Carl is out there, I sent you an email. Wondering if you’re here in Japan.

    1. Heroic Mulatto

      What the hell is a “certificate of spouse appreciation”?

    2. Rhywun

      Col. Leland Bohannon was asked in May 2017 to sign a “certificate of spouse appreciation”

      I can’t get past this sentence. What is the purpose of such a thing other than to maybe ferret out someone who doesn’t give a shit about the whole thing.

      1. In answer to both you, I have no fucking clue what that is. Basically it seems like a trap to do exactly what they did to this guy.

    3. Mustang

      I don’t know when it became a thing, but when a military member retires (at least in the Air Force), their spouse usually gets a fancy certificate that talks about all the sacrifices they also made during the member’s career. It typically acknowledges things like deployments, moves, etc.

      Basically, the military has decided that spouses get benefits like an honorary military personnel. There’s a whole other can of worms about defense spending buried in there that doesn’t get touched. Who wants to go after the benefits a spouse receives? They’d get burned alive.

      So they get certificates and awards like “Spouse of the Year” all the way up to headquarters levels. There’s a whole magazine dedicated to military spouses.

      1. straffinrun

        MilMilfs?

        1. Mustang

          Dependapolitan.

      2. Gustave Lytton

        It used to be somewhat frowned upon to wear a spouse’s rank (even though it happened all the time). Now they can wear their spouse’s career.

        1. Mustang

          That about sums it up.

    4. Rhywun

      So the end result is more fodder for the “Trump hates gays” machine.

      I hate to say it but… I hate everyone in this story.

      1. “I hate everyone in this story”

        Seems fair. The Colonel is a jackass; what’s the harm in signing a stupid card? Then again, I’d rather not open another Nazi cake can o’ worms. Can’t people just leave each other alone?

  44. straffinrun

    Does anyone else feel like a late night HM post is coming? My Jungian sense is tingling.

    1. I hope so…

    2. Number.6

      My ‘Fight, Freeze or Flee’ response is firing on all cylinders.

      1. straffinrun

        You’re only supposed to choose one.

  45. Yusef drives a Kia

    DS9 Season 7 ep.16 Adrienne Barbeau as a Romulan Senator, HOT!

    1. Rhywun

      One of the great things about DS9 – in addition to Adrienne Barbeau’s assets – was its willingness to take the shine off the lofty Federation.