I’ve discussed game weight before, and today I’m going to the heavy end of the spectrum. If you’re just starting out, these may not be the games for you. These are three games that are all wildly different, but will help to burn your brain a bit.
Game 1) Auctioning and Actioning and Activating, Oh My – Keyflower (2-6 players)
On paper, Keyflower sounds like a short game, it’s only played over four rounds. However, each round will take some time, and if you have someone prone to AP (Analysis Paralysis – being unable/unwilling to commit to a decision until they analyze all the options) this is probably not the game for them. All of the players start the game with a hut, a village tile, 8 random meeples, and 3 winter tiles. The village tiles determine player order for the start of the game, the hut is to hide your meeples, and we’ll get back to the winter tiles later. The meeples are your currency in the game, they start in three colors (red, blue, and yellow), with green being available through tiles. Each round is named after a season, so we start in Spring. To set up the round, we pull meeples from a bag and put them on boats, we draw skill tiles to put on the boats, we place turn order tiles, and then we place a number of spring tiles (determined by the number of players) between all of the players. On a player’s turn, they can either bid on a tile by placing meeples on their edge, activate a tile by placing meeples on the tile, or pass. The round ends when all players pass in a row, and unlike most games, you can pass, and then take an action later in the round. Where things get complicated is that once a color of meeple has been used on a tile, all further bids and activations of that tile must use the same color. If you’re activating a tile, you must put at least one more meeple on it then the previous activation (so if the first activation was a single meeple, the second activation would require at least two meeples), and a tile can never have more than six meeples on it. If you have been outbid on a tile, you can move the group of meeples you bid with to shore up another bid, or to activate a tile; but you cannot take them back into your hut, and they must all be moved as a group. Once a round ends, the winner of the best turn order tile selects a boat, and takes any meeples and skill tiles on it, this continues until all of the players have selected a boat. Then people take any tile that they won the bid on, and place it in their village. They also add any meeples that were on the tiles they won to their hut, while all of the bids (winning and losing) go into the bag for randomization. At that point, boat distributions may change, and a random selection of the next season’s tiles come out. In these later rounds, you are able to use tiles in other player’s villages by placing meeples on them (of course the person who owns the tile will get the meeples, but it can be worth it). Tiles can also be upgraded with certain actions, which will improve the tile, and usually be worth endgame points. The only season where the tiles coming out for the auction isn’t random is winter. Each player must select at least one of their winter tiles (told you we’d get back to them) to put into the center for auctions. Winter tiles will award endgame points based on different criteria, which can help to guide your strategy through the game. The full game will take between 90-120 minutes.
Game 2) Blame the Game, not the player – Ponzi Scheme (3-5 players)
Ok, I couldn’t stay away from offering up a good game for relatively new players. This is more of a midweight game, but the interaction is where it gets dense. If you don’t know what a Ponzi scheme is, get thee to a wiki. For the rest of you, in this game the players are all running their own Ponzi schemes. To play, each player starts with a shield, a countdown rondel, a reference card, and a pen card (to keep track that everyone’s been moving their countdown rondel correctly). A play board with three rows is set in the center, and the initial funding cards are organized by their payouts. The remaining funding cards are shuffled and placed next to the board. The game is then played in phases, starting with the funding phase. In the funding phase, starting with the first player, players can take a funding card. The funding cards have a dollar amount on them, a payout amount, and a payout time (for the math challenged, they also calculate the interest rate of the payments). What row you select from is dependant on how many industry tiles you have. Each time you take a funding card, you must take an industry tile at the same time. If you have no industry tiles in that same color, you pick from the first row, if you have one industry tile in the same color, the second row, and if you have two industry tiles in the same color, the third row. The industry tiles will be worth points, and limit trading in later phases. Whenever a funding card is removed from the board, a new one is drawn and the cards are reordered based on their payout values. After the funding phase, we move on to the clandestine trading phase (this is skipped in the first round of the game). Starting with the first player, each player gets to put some of their money (hidden behind their player shield) into a fancy leather wallet. Then they hand that wallet to a player with a matching industry tile, and name the industry they want to purchase. The player who receives the wallet has two options: keep the money in the wallet, and hand over the industry tile; or they double the money in the wallet and hand it back to the initiator and purchase one of their industry tiles. The wallet gets passed on to the next player in player order and this repeats until everyone has made an offer or passed. The third phase is to pass the first player marker (a cardboard pen), and the player who is receiving the pen selects a funding card to remove from the player board. After that the fourth phase is to check if there’s a bear market. A bear market happens when the number of funding cards with a bear in the background is equal to or greater than the number of players. If there’s not a bear market, then every player rotates their countdown rondel one tick and must payback any loans that have the red arrow pointing at them. If there’s a bear market, each player must discard one industry tile from the industry they have the most tiles in (if the player has a tie between two industries they pick), then the rondel moves two places, and any that the red arrow moves through or end on must be paid. After the loans are paid, the loan cards get placed back at their payout number on the rondel. You didn’t think you ever paid these loans back, did you? The game ends when any player is unable to make all of the loan payments that are required of them, this can happen to more than one person at the same time. All players who went bankrupt lose, and do not score points. The other players score points for their industry tiles. The industry tiles are scored where the first one in any industry is worth 1 point, the second is worth 2 points, the third, 3 points, etc. Money is worth nothing at the end of the game. So if a player had 3 green tiles, 4 red tiles, and 2 blue tiles, their final score would be: (1+2+3) + (1+2+3+4) + (1+2) = 19 points. This game will go between 45 – 90 minutes.
Game 3) If you can’t handle the heat, get out of the field – Scoville (2-6 players)
Scoville is a game that looks like it should be friendly, you’re trying to plant hot peppers, cross breed them, harvest them, and either sell them for cash or completing chili recipes for points. There are two time periods of the game, the morning and the afternoon. The time period dictates which Auction card deck you user, as well as which market tiles are available for purchase. The game is played in turns, which have the following phases:
- Auction – All players secretly bid coins to select their place in turn order. If you don’t spend at least 1 coin, you just maintain the same relative turn order. After the turn orders are set, in the new turn order, players select Auction cards, which provide pepper(s).
- Planting – In turn order players each must plant one pepper into the communal field. The pepper must be adjacent to a pepper already in the field (two are seeded in the field during the setup). If you plant a non-basic pepper, and there’s a score tile available, you may claim it.
- Harvesting – In reverse turn order, players move their farmer through the field, moving up to 3 steps. They cannot pass through other farmers, and must move forward or turn in 90 degree angles. For every pair of peppers they pass between, they harvest new peppers based on the cross breeding chart (as an example a red pepper + a blue pepper = a Purple pepper; there are 4 tiers of peppers in the game).
- Fulfillment – In turn order players may each claim a market tile with peppers, complete a chili recipe, or sell a batch of peppers to the bank. Each player can only do each item once, but they can do all three.
- Time Check – Depending how many recipe cards, and/or market tiles are available, the game can move to afternoon or to a final round.
Each player keeps their peppers, money, and claimed tiles/cards behind a player screen. So it becomes important to keep in mind how much money players have, as well as what peppers they may have. Each player also starts with three bonus action tiles that allow them to either break a movement rule or plant an extra pepper during their turn. These tiles are worth 4 points at the end of the game if you haven’t used them. The real meat is in planting peppers to make your movements more valuable, while causing other people to have movements that don’t provide them what they need. During the fulfillment phase, players who claim a market tile will get cash or more peppers, while recipes are worth only points. The game scales quite well, with a different number of cards and tiles coming out dependant on player counts (and all of the amounts printed on the board for easy reference). Adding players does add play time, so I would recommend sticking with 3-4 for your first play. At the end game, players score up their points, with peppers being worth nothing at the end of the game. The highest score wins.
I hope that some of you that have been reading along are willing to make an attempt at some of these more complicated games. Keyflower has a decent implementation on BoardGameArena.com (which I discussed briefly in an early column) in case you wanted to try one of these out without purchasing them.
OT: File under Millennials ruin everything.
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/women/life/rise-gym-party-adults-getting-sweaty-replaced-getting-sloshed/
“More than 500 people attended Club Soda, a sober festival in London last year, where the only thing to drink was 20 non-alcoholic craft beers.” Does. Not. Compute.
Do they get sweaty in bed too?
“Everything from taxidermy classes to life-drawing and lampshade-making have surged in popularity, partly because people are now hankering after experiences and also because you can do all these things un-drunk.”
Do do you know who else didn’t drink and made lampshades?
My aunt? Worst gift giver ever.
And Count Potato wins the ‘You know who else…’ question of the year award.
The obvious answer: Ed Gein
“‘Feminist Science’ event teaches researchers how to do ‘socially just science’
Scientific inquiry has long been considered a stalwart of observation and objectivity, but one effort underway by some researchers prioritizes applying a “critical social justice lens into science,” according to an upcoming event at UC Santa Cruz.
The event, what organizers dubbed “Feminist Science,” describes the effort as a method that infuses social justice, inclusion and equality into science to advance progressive social change.
“Research Justice 101: Tools for Feminist Science” will be hosted at the Northern California school next week and teach researchers how to “practice a socially just science,” according to the event’s description on the university’s website. Researchers at UC Berkeley and other nearby schools have been invited to attend.
“Participants will be challenged to apply principles and practices of justice to their own work, interrogating questions such as: Who benefits? Who is harmed? Who is most vulnerable? … And ultimately, who do we do science for, and why? The workshop will conclude with practical skills and resources for participants to push their research communities to be more inclusive, equitable and attentive to social justice,” the event description states.
The workshop is hosted by Free Radicals, described as “a collective that envisions an open and responsible science that works toward progressive social change.””
http://www.thecollegefix.com/post/41257/
“do science” isn’t a phrase scientists use.
These look like a bunch of liberal arts types (NTTAWWI)
so, again, those with the strongest opinions on a subject are the ones who know nothing of it ?
You know how in classical times people were really good at things like math and science and running water, and then the Roman Empire fell apart and suddenly people were retarded and throwing their waste in the streets and thinking using leeches was a good idea medically speaking? I think it’s going to happen again. Relatively soon.
Are you saying I shouldn’t be throwing my waste in the street yet?
When you say relatively soon, can it be after I’ve lived another 40-50 years in a world that’s a lot like this one?
People aren’t dumber but they don’t engage with reality anymore, many people are far removed from any infrastructure understanding they don’t understand food, money, manufacturing, the internet. They know nothing about history in any depth and what spark notes they do are about the civil war and Nazi’s. I bet most people couldn’t even name the 3 axis Powers or understand what that name means. Italy as an enemy has been almost memory holed.
Games. Ok, I can weigh in. Noted yesterday that they were having a free weekend for Black Desert Online and that Dishonored 2 is now offering a Demo with the first 3 missions.
My take on this?
Black Desert Online: Delete that shit before you download it. It’s fucking awful. Awful mechanics, awful animation, weird cow like creatures floating above the ground, horrible UI beyond description, no just hell fucking no.
Dishonored 2: First off all, this is a console port and you PC action RPG gamers just may as well get used to that upfront. The game really does not work with K&M only. There is no walk speed, even when crouching and sneaking. There is only run and run faster. This will completely destroy the atmosphere of an otherwise very atmospheric game. So if you can play with your Xbox controller which will allow you to control walk speed, or if you can pull off playing with both K&M and Xbox controller, then you’ll probably enjoy this. I spent about 3 hours playing last night with my Xbox controller in my left hand to move and mouse control by my right hand. Then when faced with some action, switching to keyboard. Might not be for everyone, but for me it’s impossible to play this with Keyboard only, don’t bother if you need to do that. If you can play with controller or combo, then definitely try the demo, it’s very pretty and fun.
You’re only calling Black Desert Online awful because you’re racist.
And the correct term is Desert of Color.
Well, I mean it’s mostly Asian women with big tits and bare asses, but if you say so.
https://twitter.com/Emmyjewel/status/957176030577401858
IT’S GOING TO TURN THE FRIGGIN’ TOADS NECROPHILIAC!!
Glibertarian hearse?
https://pbs.twimg.com/media/DUABsNGX0AAjcKZ.jpg
The output arm should be pointed into the back of the hearse where the buckets are located.
so we start in Spring. To set up the round, we pull meeples from a bag and put them on boats, we draw skill tiles to put on the boats
So pretty much slavery. I bet the rules are titled “The Constitution” as well.
I’ll bet she does.
Clinton: We need to eliminate Electoral College
http://thehill.com/homenews/campaign/350603-clinton-we-need-to-eliminate-electoral-college
***
Hillary Clinton in a new interview called for an end to the Electoral College.
“I think it needs to be eliminated,” Clinton said of the Electoral College during an interview on CNN.
“I’d like to see us move beyond it, yes.”
The former Democratic presidential nominee won the popular vote in the 2016 presidential election by nearly 3 million votes.
But she lost the Electoral College to President Trump.
***
[Nelson laugh]
And it’s even more easy that dumping that old Constitution and starting over again! I mean it’s like… a game!
And they think selective campaigning is a problem now?
Hillary, you aren’t going to be president. Not today, not tomorrow, not ever and thank God for that.
If the results had been inverse she would be singing the praises of the electoral college. As usual, everything is about her. If she wants to get rid of it she can try to get the constitution amended. Good luck with that.
Stossel had lunch with the Clintons one time. Hilarity ensued.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S9w3CeWqZaQ
Stossel tried to argue that too many regulations are bad and cited the example of the island resort they were at. The reason there was a tourist industry was because there were few regulations so it was easy to start a business.
Well, she didn’t like that. She raves about how govt must control everything and then stopped talking to Stossel.
Stossel, talking about Bill being a ‘close talker’ said, I “I move back, he comes”
I giggled. Of course Bill did.
Could there be a connection?
Ratings for Late Night Comedy Shows Plummet, as Political Commentary Increases
https://www.theepochtimes.com/ratings-for-late-night-comedy-shows-plummet-as-political-commentary-increases_2330448.html
***
Late night talk show giants like Stephen Colbert, Jimmy Fallon, Seth Myers, and Jimmy Kimmel started seeing their ratings drop dramatically this year, as they continued to inject political commentary into their shows.
The comedians all have one thing in common—their anti-Trump rhetoric, often promoting their personal political views to their audiences and making fun of President Donald Trump at a nonstop pace.
***
Best thing for them to do: prog harder. Obviously they’re not intense enough in their Trump-bashing.
Here are the current top late night comedians
-all have same stance on every issue
-all endorsed the same candidate
-all support the same political party
[Zoidberg voice]
Now that’s what I call comedy!
I can handle a little (very little) partisanship if you’re really funny, but these guys do nothing for me.
If your position boils down to nothing more than We Rock / You Suck, you’ll never get my attention, no matter which side you’re on.
In market terms, there would seem to be a huge hole where a show like this belongs:
holding forth on the day’s latest examples of crony bureaucracy and government waste ineptitude and unintended consequences.
Sponsors might include SturmRuger, the F150, Tony Lama, and some offshore bank or encrypted email service.
There was a show like that with Tim Allen called Last Man Standing. It was cancelled despite high ratings.
Chevy Chase admitted that he portrayed President Ford as an idiot because he wanted to help Carter get elected.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zRLHPUGKoXo
Well, at least he seems ashamed about it now.
Chevy can repent of something else:
not a single electoral vote was ever changed by SNL.
Or the Russians or anyone else. As soon as the party nominees were chosen every American knew who they were going to vote for, including the electors. The candidates messages were so radically different and appealed to radically different demographics that Chevy’s slap-stick or Ruskies ” Yuuu vill vote forrr Trrrrumph Facebook pages” wasn’t going to cut it. The only people that influenced the electors were the voters.
But, with this one amazing trick you can swing an entire election for only$48,000!
Last appeared to have a loyal 5M following amongst the over 50 crowd, so a rich demo.
Maybe they thought they couldn’t afford to burn that 21 minutes on only 1M under 50 folk:
maybe some flimsy notion of hoped for network loyalty led them to overestimate the importance of today?
I tried watching some of those, including Samantha Bee and the black british dude, whatever his name is. Not once did they say a single funny thing. My poker face never cracked. There were no jokes at all. Nothing funny. Five minutes of each was all I could stand.
The candidate that these people supported, many of her minions, and these comedians themselves spent years making tounge in cheek references the awfulness of the average american and during campaign season openly said so. Every time they make a Trump joke the audience is reminded of that. Every time they say Trump is a poopyhead they are saying that Trump’s supporters are poopyheads. This is not lost on their audience. What they are doing is very foolish. I think they should double down and when they crash crawl back under their rocks.
Trevor Noah? He’s as funny as an outbreak of herpes in my third least-favorite mistress.
The only good thing about him is that he’s South African and not British.
“South African and not British”
Like I said, five minutes and only paying attention for half of one of those.
What evs……..if a south african is not a kraut eating boar they are just disheveled Brits with extra southern latitude and or are pissed off Zimbos which puts them in the same group anyways.
Ooh, Stossel!
***
Kamal Saleh runs a small store in New York City. He was recently given a summons to appear in court for violating one of New York’s many rules. His crime was selling cigars… 11 cents too cheaply.
***
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mjs7HrkcjrE
Not only does Mr Kamal have to spend his time and money dealing with this stupidity, he has to contribute to the salary and sweet pension of the worthless shit who wrote the ticket and all the scum in the court house.
Err..Me Saleh.
Nevermind.
Several folks have discussed lately that it’s not a good idea to buy a new car. Seems a lot of trade ins are underwater.
https://jalopnik.com/a-third-of-car-trade-ins-are-now-utterly-worthless-on-p-1822443820
A new low for CNN
***
Blaming Trump is no doubt the reason CNN released another lame apple/banana ad on Friday. The new ad focused on the danger posed by critics who use the First Amendment to call out the press.
“Some people might try to tell you that this is an apple. It might even start as a joke. But when they say it over and over and over again, and people start to believe it, it’s only a matter of time before someone gets hurt,” the ad warned. Then the screen flashed to “Facts First.”
***
Yes, they really did this.
https://twitter.com/CNN/status/957014930535874571
Wow, the comments are brutal
My favorite:
Yes, facts matter. Calling a banana an apple is no different than calling a man a woman. Right, CNN?
But when they say it over and over and over again, and people start to believe it, it’s only a matter of time before someone gets hurt,”…..or even a special counsel.
The biggest problem in the multiverse is that Glibs comment on the intertoobz. The narrative is ruined comrades, ruined!
Well… I’m going to go back and play some more of something, cause no one here comments.
I’m playing make the bourbon disappear. I’m winning.
?
I’m playing a similar game, but its the contents of 40 oz Coor’s Light bottles. In a paper sack, cause I’m classy af.
And University of Dayton lost…..much sadz.
No one here comments OR no one comments here?
/* no comment */
Wait for either ZARDOZ or STEVE SMITH to post something.
Someone always either gets cleansed or raped in those posts. Kinda like ‘Silkwood’ combined with ‘The Accused’.
My posts seem not to be showing up? Is it a glitch or did I do something like John and the others, I don’t think I did.
My posts aren’t showing up… did I get blocked or a glitch?