For those of you who say I “never” mention your sign a) you’re wrong and b) here’s why you might perceive that:

There are seven celestial bodies and twelve signs.  This is already a problem.  However, three of those seven are linked and are always close together.  Venus is never more than two signs from the sun (it’s the morning or evening star, never the midnight star) and Mercury is never more than one sign away.  So for eleven months out of the year, you can’t get the sun, nine you can’t get Mercury, and seven you can’t even have Venus (which really kind of sucks, seeing as how she give a buff to your chances to getting laid).  If it’s not that slice of the year when you can get those three, you’ll have to rely on the outer planets which move very slowly because they are fat.

This week sees a continuation of the Saturn-Venus-Sol alignment (see last week’s horoscope for interpretation details) but this week it intersects (through Venus) with another (angularly irrelevant) alignment of Venus-Terra-Luna.  Like Venus, the Moon is a powerful feminine sign.  The Earth represents home.  So you have two women living together in a loving relationship.  Which reminds me that IFH hasn’t been on in a long time and this week is really lucky for a particular demographic that is conspicuously absent here.

That’s it.  That’s all the alignments this week.

The new visitations aren’t terribly good, unfortunately.  The moon in Aries brings missteps and inappropriate irritability.  Be careful not to overreact to provocations.

Mars in Pisces adds to the irritation, supra.

Triple conjunction in Sagittarius — Sol, Mercury, Jupiter.  This is the gambler’s fortune.  I’m… not certain how to apply it to the Glibertariat as a whole.  For an individual client, it would signify victory in a game, but so many of you back opposing teams that doesn’t seem to make any sense.

Venus in Scorpio.  We mentioned that last week.  Oh, and about Scorpio ruling the fin bits?  Here’s a diagram of the body and how the zodiac relates:

Obviously made by a leg guy

You should see some of the medieval ones. I know that dissection and therefore human anatomy was forbidden, but Jesus guys THE HEART IS NOT AT THE WAISTLINE