SP and I are traveling again, this time en route in deepest Iowa on our way to perform a ritual of liver-bashing with our dear friends, the RAHeinlein family. And fittingly, we passed the Field of Dreams tourist trap along the way. Emphasis on “passed.”

But you’re here for news and snark, not to watch our vacation slides.

It’s a slightly auspicious day- it’s the anniversary of the Mormons getting kicked out of Missouri. Mojeaux had the last laugh on that one. Birthdays include one of my favorite contemporary artists, Roy Lichtenstein, total piece of shit statist Teddy Roosevelt, the hilariously gifted (but sadly politically stupid) John Cleese, the race car driver with the greatest name ever, and the sexual fantasy of my youth Carrie Snodgress.

On to the news.

Fittingly, the big sports news was in baseball, where the shithead Dodgers and horrible humans Red Sox inadvertently played a double header. No snark here, just ennui and a recollection of Henry Kissinger’s famous aphorism, “It’s a pity they both can’t lose.”

Speaking of which… Defense Secretary Mattis gravely intoned that the 273,428th execution by Saudi Arabia of one of its own fabulously wealthy and corrupt citizens will destabilize the Middle East.

“Failure of any one nation to adhere to international norms and the rule of law undermines regional stability at a time when it is needed most,” Mattis said. He did not mention de facto Saudi ruler Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman by name at any point.

Yes, we need to preserve that stability for which the Middle East is known. On the bright side, there’s no indication (yet) that Trump is going to follow in the footsteps of Bush/Obama and start a couple of new wars there.

The furor over nut-nut Cesar Sayoc’s pretend “bombs” is already starting to show signs of winding down, except… he apparent committed the greatest outrage of them all.

“The accused bomber plastered a picture of me on the side of his van, with a crosshairs target over my face. Actually, the target is over my neck, which I’ll take as a minor concession on his part,” [rich piece of shit pretending to defend the working class Michael] Moore said in a statement.

“The threat of right-wing violence against figures on the American left is not new. It is not an aberration. It is not a violation of norms. It IS the norm,” Moore added. “Rupert Murdoch’s Fox News Channel and right-wing radio have preyed upon those who’ve seen their American Dream go up in smoke, and they have helped to create a generation of angry and violent conspiracy theorists who will believe any lie that is perpetrated on those airwaves. These angry right wing men have been openly encouraged to act on those lies, even as late as this very morning when Trump was tweeting his doubts that the bombs were real.”

You tell ’em, Mikey!

If you had any lingering doubts about the purpose of the now-notorious “caravan,” doubt no more. Those poor folks are just trying to escape oppression, not make political points. Right?

Several thousand Central American migrants turned down a Mexican offer of benefits if they applied for refugee status and stayed in the country’s two southernmost states, vowing to set out before dawn Saturday to continue their long trek toward the U.S. border.
Mexican President Enrique Pena Nieto announced what he called the “You are at home” plan, offering shelter, medical attention, schooling and jobs to Central Americans in Chiapas and Oaxaca states if they applied, calling it a first step toward permanent refugee status.

Oops.

On Friday evening, Irineo Mujica, whose organization People without Borders is supporting the caravan, accused Mexican immigration agents of harassing migrants in an effort to stop the group’s advance. He urged them to travel closely together.
“They are terrorizing us,” he said.

As someone who is strongly pro-immigration, I confess to being horribly embarrassed and offended by these assholes.

Speaking of assholes, it’s interesting to see the conundrum when the Border Patrol is faced with the choice between more power and support for their organization and more power and support for their union. Guess who wins?

[Union president] Judd appeared in TV ads for McCaskill and Tester. In the McCaskill ad, Judd said: “Those ads against [Senator Claire] McCaskill [D-Misery] on immigration just aren’t true. She was one of only four Democrats to vote to end sanctuary cities.” Judd also praised McCaskill’s record on border security.

In its 361-word September endorsement of McCaskill against Republican challenger Josh Hawley, NBPC wrote: “Sen. McCaskill has risen above the partisanship of Washington to genuinely listen to the concerns of Border Patrol agents and to fight for the increase in resources and staff needed at the border.”

When NBPC announced its endorsement of [Senator Jon] Tester [D- On His Way Out], also in September, Judd said:“The Republicans don’t own border security [as an issue] … There are Democrats that do support border security. There’s a lot more that run away from it unfortunately, but Sen. Tester is not one who does that.”

Who loses? Yep, us. Wouldn’t it be nice if we had an administration that concluded that the 100 mile Bill-of-Rights-free-zone given to the Border Patrol gestapo was blatantly unconstitutional? I know, that’s crazy talk.

Back in our home state, showing a rare flash of a sense of humor, the soon-to-be-ex-Governor Bruce Rauner has stolen a line from an article I posted here a week or two ago.

llinois Republican Gov. Bruce Rauner has an ad out this week depicting a mock wedding between Democratic rival J.B. Pritzker and state House Speaker Michael Madigan. The 30-second TV ad, titled “Unholy Union,” features an officiator and stand-ins for Pritzker and Madigan at the altar.
In the ad, the two characters swear to “honor and obey” each other. The officiant concludes, “By the power vested in me, I now pronounce Illinois fucked.”

Good on ya. You’re still a piece of shit, though, just like your Team Blue opponent, so we’re of course voting for Kash Jackson, nee Benjamin Winderweedle.

The most amusing part is the faux outrage.

Meanwhile, the ad drew a backlash from gay rights groups. “We are deeply disappointed by Gov. Rauner’s new campaign ad that mocks marriage equality by tying two of his opponents together in a parody wedding,” Brian C. Johnson, CEO of Equality Illinois, said in a statement. “The governor should be ashamed of using the LGBTQ community for comedic value to make a political hit.”

HAHAHAHA!

Remember when civil rights groups were pro-free speech? That seems like a distant memory…
…a group of civil rights and advocacy groups are weighing in with advice on how big tech services can better identify and remove hateful activity.

In a new report, six organizations — including Center for American Progress, Color of Change and Southern Poverty Law Center — have drafted a series of policy recommendations, such as:

  • Make it clear to users that engaging in hateful activities is grounds for termination.
  • Use both technology and human employees to help remove hateful activities.
  • Routinely test any technology that’s used to screen content for bias.
  • Allow users — but not government — a way to flag hateful content, and create a trusted flagger program for vetted human-rights organizations.
  • Provide the public with a regularly updated report summarizing hateful actions taken on its platforms and the company’s response.

“Vetted human-rights organizations,” of course meaning “Center for American Progress, Color of Change and Southern Poverty Law Center.” It’s always nice to see the transparency of fund-raising and power-grabbing trumping any sense of principles.

Old Guy Music. This song came up at work yesterday when it was playing on the stream of one of my senior chemists- when it first came out, I used the intro as an example of English dialects that are absolutely incomprehensible to American ears. Many years later, I had a Cockney friend translate it for me. Nonetheless, Mick Abrahams is a great blues guitarist, this is a great song, and goddam it, you ought to listen to it.