Today young Ted “Theodore” L had all his diapers thrown away and will henceforth wear underwear. And treat them like cloth diapers. Three times I tossed him on the shitter, and what does he do, he sneaks around behind a table, and as I come around (because I suspect he’s taking a dump) yells, “Go ‘way, Daddy! There no poop hewe!” You know who says that in my experience? Someone who just shit their pants. And, in fact, this was the case. Its like he’s more comfortable walking around with his own shit weighing him down than just doing what I asked. There’s a metaphor there, but it might be crap.

Former head of the CDC arrested for sexual abuse. Remember when they were just literal dog-fuckers. Maybe someone should take out a multi-billion dollar grant to study the epidemiological patterns of sexual deviancy in federal institutions.

Horse gone, Papa Johns CEO insists on closing barn door. To strain the metaphor, I’m rooting for a cow and lantern scenario.

This is pretty much how I see LA in my head.

When you look at the map of this dangerous “kissing bug”, it seems that the Jayne Cobb school of romance appears near universal in West Virginia and New Jersey. Anyone surprised?

 

For OMWC, safely back from Detroit, I thought I’d play something from the Motor City Madman’s finest musical days.