Well, the Braves tomahawk-chopped the Marlins twice. The Mets beat the Yankees. The Tigers topped the White Sox. The Indians scalped the Reds. The surging Cardinals beat the Nationals. The Rangers took down the Diamondbacks. The Royals beat the Blue Jays. The Athletics sank the Mariners. The Angels beat the Padres. And the Giants took down their rival Dodgers. Fortunately the World Champion Houston Astros got a day off.

That’s pretty much it for sports. Except for using sports to point out how much of a nanny state England is. What a bunch of douchebags.

Rusty Wallace doing what he does best: wrecking

Do we have any birthday boys or girls?  If so, you share this date with none other than: everyone’s favorite huckleberry Doc Holliday, TV inventor John Logie Baird, baseball’s Hall Of Fame manager Earl Weaver, rocker David Crosby, funnyman Steve Martin, romance novelist Danielle Steele, The Far Side creator Gary Larson, driver and target of chicken bones and beer cans Rusty Wallace, basketball star Magic Johnson, actress Halle Berry, strange-voiced Mila Kunis, and alleged virgin Tim Tebow.

Its also the day Kublai Khan wished he had doppler radar because he lost 3500 ships in a typhoon, Henry David Thoreau was jailed for refusing to pay taxes, the last public execution in the United States was held (in 1936), the Japs unconditionally surrendered and WW2 came to a close, “I Got You Babe” went to #1, Pete Rose (who would later voluntarily accept a lifetime ban from MLB) passed Hank Aaron for most all-time at bats, and Winnie Mandela was sued by the South African government.

And with that, we head into…the links!

Russians 11-year old kids hack into mock version of Florida’s election system.  Nice work there.  Maybe instead of blaming outside actors, you’ll secure your own system…and simply use paper ballots and voter ID to ensure both accuracy and integrity of the process, huh?

A battle of wits between a potato and a pizza

Papa John’s is circling the wagons and hoping to make it through its current crisis intact. Although with shares off 25% and people having a short memory, maybe now is the time to buy it up.

A scathing, and timely, media takedown of…the media. But its from the NY Post, so I doubt anybody in the bubble will heed any of the warnings. Besides, they’re too busy saving the world from the free exchange of ideas and information. At least according to them they are.

Does the plaintiff even have standing? I say neigh. Others say yes.

I guess this Alderman never heard of multitasking. Or he’s just pandering to his base. Either way, its still a shitshow in that city.

Asshole

And speaking of pandering politicians…this one might win the award for biggest asshole of the year.  Because, you know, anyone that thanks the people who dropped their tax rate from 38 to 20% is in league with white nationalists, or something.  Either way, this guy is an asshole who doesn’t realize or doesn’t care that there are actual people who work at these places. And they vote.

Adios, douche-nugget.

You know what you do with turds? You flush them.*.

*Except in San Francisco where you step around or over them because they’re on the sidewalk. But be careful not to run your foot through a heroin needle. Because they’re all over as well.

And in what should be a bigger story than it is, the Indian rupee hit an all-time low against the dollar. But global currency meltdowns aren’t as important as whether or not Trump is on a recording in the WH. Because “media priorities” aren’t important news, they’re hot takes that generate clicks.

Anyway, enjoy this bit of greatness from a wonderful band.

Now go out there and have a great day!