I mean come on, it’s bacon. You want a good reason to hate on Joos, Mooslims and vegetarians/vegans? They don’t eat pork, which means they don’t eat bacon. In this two part series, we’ll go through the process of creating two glorious versions of pork belly, smoked bacon and Pancetta.
Today we do bacon. To start with, we need some fresh pork belly (also called pork sides). We have Cash & Carry here, which carries good quality products at reasonable prices. What you want to look for when making bacon, is a slab that is 2/3 meat to 1/3 fat. I find half bellies work best for me.
What we need next is to calculate the proper amount of Cure #1 (pink salt), salt and sugar. Cure #1 contains 6.25% of Nitrite, with the rest being Sodium Chloride. The FDA guidelines for Cure #1 & 2 is 1.1gm per pound. This is approximately 1tsp per five pounds of meat. A great way to figure out your quantities is to use a cure calculator. The best one I know of is the one on the Digging Dogs Farm website. Do yourself a favor and purchase a decent scale that will do small quantities. This is the one I use:
Buy the 100gm calibration weight too.
A note on Sodium Nitrite and Nitrate:
Unless you’re eating quantities of cured meats on a regular basis, you may rest easy when it comes to the bogeyman that is Nitrites/Nitrates.
“According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), your daily intake of sodium nitrate shouldn’t be more than 3.7 milligrams per kilo of body weight.”
For someone weighing 150 pounds, that equates to .25gm. A five pound slab of bacon contains .34gm of pure Nitrite.
Sodium Nitrite is commonly known as Cure #1 and is typically used for meats that only undergo short term curing, usually two weeks or less. Sodium Nitrate, known as Cure #2 is used for longer curing meats such as salami. The Sodium Nitrate breaks down over time and converts to Sodium Nitrite, basically making it a time release source of Sodium Nitrite.
Celery juice “substitute”. Yeah, the naturally occurring Sodium Nitrate in celery is chemically converted to Sodium Nitrite, or left as Nitrate. You’re using the same chemical to cure your meat. This is known as “marketing”. To stay within FDA guidelines, the same quantities of both are used, regardless of source.
Okay, we used the calculator, we measure out our curing mix, now we need to add other flavorings, if you so choose. You can use whatever strikes your fancy. I’ve found what works well for me is to add a good amount of black pepper, granulated garlic and ground bay leaves. Mix this all up with your cure and rub it evenly over your rinsed, and dried belly. Rub it in good. At this point, we need to wrap it and let it rest. You can buy 2 gallon zip lock bags, which work very well, or if you have a vacuum sealer that can do large bags, it’s a great option. I think the vacuum sealing results in better penetration of the cure. Next, into the refrigerator for 10-14 days. I like two weeks. I think it produces good flavor and you know your cure has penetrated all the way through. Every couple of days, flip the package over and rub the meat. Liquid will appear in the first few days and then most of it will gradually reabsorb.
After we’re done curing our belly, it’s time to prep for smoking. Rinse all of the cure and flavorings off the belly and dry it well. Now it needs to go back on a rack in the fridge for 2-4 days. This will allow the surface to dry and form a pellicle, which is a slighty sticky surface the smoke will adhere to. This is also where you can add things like black pepper to turn it into pepper bacon just before smoking.
Cold smoking versus hot smoking:
Cold smoking will give you a product with a nice flavor and a finer crisp texture when the bacon is cooked. The bacon will still be raw when it’s done smoking. If you’re going to cold smoke, follow the directions on your smoker. Not all of them are capable of cold smoking. I have a quality electric smoker which allows me to control the conditions quite well, but it does put out a lot of smoke in the beginning, so I’ve had to develop process where I don’t over smoke the bacon, which will result in a product that smells like a campfire. The timing for cold smoking also varies widely. Some are capable of cold smoking for several days. In my situation, it’s about 4-6 hours or else there will be too much smoke.
Hot smoking is a fine alternative. You will need a temperature probe for your bacon. ThermoWorks and Maverick both make quality probes.
Follow the directions for your smoker. It should take about four hours at 200 degrees to reach an internal temperature of 150. Don’t get the smoker too hot, or you will start to render out the fat, which is not at all what we want. With hot smoking, the bacon will be fully cooked when it’s done smoking. I most definitely recommend slicing a piece off the end when you bring it inside and stuffing it into your maw for one of the finest bites of porcine known to man.
Wood choice is up to you. I find a combination of hickory and cherry, or apple gives me the best results. And for those of you who don’t like smoked meats, or don’t have a smoker, bacon doesn’t have to be smoked at all if you so choose. Once you’ve let it dry in the fridge for a few days, slice it up.
Once the bacon is done, let it rest in the fridge uncovered for up to a week to allow the smoke to penetrate.
On to processing. I cut the bacon into four squares and throw them into the freezer. You want the meat close to freezing for slicing. I cut them into pieces because I have a small slicer and it’s easier for packaging. I would recommend buying a slicer better than my cheap Cabela’s pos. I’ll be upgrading in the not too distant future. Cut the bacon to the thickness you like and then package it up. I do eight ounce packages.
From here, the rest is up to you. I actually don’t eat a lot of bacon as just bacon. More often than not, it’s an ingredient in another dish. As for cooking slices, the best method is on a rack in a 325 degree oven. The way I typically do it is to lay it in a cold skillet and turn the heat onto medium. I keep an eye on it and turn it frequently. Dry on paper towels and enjoy! In our next episode, we will explore making that delectable Italian style bacon known as Pancetta.
Thanks for looking.
Hate them? I love them – more bacon for me! What is not to love about that?
And first.
Glass half full!
If I ever get out of apartment living, a smoker is first on list.
Husband won a smoker and he loves it. I sent him this because nom nom nom.
Sweet! Thanks for sharing. I just got a new smoker and look forward to trying this.
Warning, once you’ve done your own, you’ll never buy bacon again.
Well, shit. He said, “You’re gonna make me bacon? Thank you, honey.”
Um…
My understanding of “uncured meats”:
They’re much worse for you that the FDA approved curing method. The amount of nitrate in celery is highly variable, so they always have to put in more than is necessary to ensure a margin of safety when preserving meat. Almost without exception, the nitrate content in “uncured” meats with celery powder is higher than in traditionally cured meats.
Not only is the marketing stupid; in this case, it’s dangerous.
Oh, and for the record, there is some nasty stuff in celery.
Yeah, it’s made of celery.
There is definitely an upper limit on nitrates. There are some curing recipes out there from supposedly reputable people that are downright dangerous.
Yeah, and I see shelves full of that stuff at my market being pushed as the “best” meats. With the prices to match. I’ve long suspected a similar scam to the “organic” one.
Some day I hope to have enough free time to learn how to smoke meats. My father is completely uninterested. I find this baffling, especially since my grandfather built one of the most beautiful brick smokers I have ever seen.
I can’t believe you didn’t link this.
Spud, have you ever tried any sous vide methods for bacon?
I’ve been resisting the sous vides movement. I really don’t need another kitchen gadget.
What methods have you found? I would think they would be more geared towards doing pork belly recipes as opposed to bacon.
I’ve seen a few that involve cold smoking and then a 12 hour bath.
I supposed that it just makes it more tender. IMO, there is no way to improve the flavor of bacon.
A sous vide stick won’t take up much room at all, and I see that you already have a vacuum sealer.
IF you decide to give SV a try, this is the best thing to ever come out of my kitchen. Smokerless brisket is a close second.
PDF’d and added to the recipes folder.
STOP IT, JUST STOP IT!!! I’ve held off for over a year now.
Oh, just get one and dive in. You know you want to!
Or do the brisket sous vide and then smoke it for a couple hours with a grill smoker for a good crust. With the exception of corned beef — which my wife had never tried until I introduced her, that is her 2nd favorite way to eat brisket.
Chewy > crunchy. Fight me.
I got your back.
You swine. You vulgar little maggot. You worthless bag of filth. I wager you couldn’t empty a boot of excrement were the instructions on the heel. You are a canker. A sore that won’t go away. I would rather kiss a lawyer than be seen with you. Try to edit your responses of unnecessary material before attempting to impress us with your insight. The evidence that you are a nincompoop will still be available to readers, but they will be able to access it more rapidly.
You snail-skulled little rabbit. Would that a hawk pick you up, drive its beak into your brain, and upon finding it rancid set you loose to fly briefly before spattering the ocean rocks with the frothy pink shame of your ignoble blood. May you choke on the queasy, convulsing nausea of your own trite, foolish beliefs. You are weary, stale, flat and unprofitable. You are grimy, squalid, nasty and profane. You are foul and disgusting. You’re a fool, an ignoramus.
And what meaning do you expect your delusional self-important statements of unknowing, inexperienced opinion to have to us who think and reason? What fantasy do you hold that you would believe that your tiny-fisted tantrums would have more weight than that of a leprous desert rat, spinning rabidly in a circle, waiting for the bite of the snake? You are a waste of flesh.
You have no rhythm. You are ridiculous and obnoxious. You are the moral equivalent of a leech. You are a living emptiness, a meaningless void. You are sour and senile. You are a disease, you puerile one-handed slack-jawed , drooling meatslapper. You smarmy lagerlout git. You bloody woofter sod. Bugger off, pillock. You grotty wanking oik artless base-court apple-john. You clouted boggish foot-licking twit. You dankish clack-dish plonker. You gormless crook-pated tosser. You churlish boil-brained clotpole ponce. You cockered bum-bailey poofter. You gob-kissing gleeking flap-mouthed coxcomb. You dread-bolted fobbing beef-witted clapper-clawed flirt-gill.
You are a fiend and a coward, and you have bad breath. You are degenerate, noxious and depraved. I feel debased just for knowing you exist. I despise everything about you, and I wish you would go away. I cannot believe how incredibly stupid you are. I mean rock-hard stupid. Dehydrated-rock-hard stupid. Stupid so stupid that it goes way beyond the stupid we know into a whole different dimension of stupid. You are trans-stupid stupid. Meta-stupid. Some pure essence of a stupid so uncontaminated by anything else as to be beyond the laws of physics that we know. I’m sorry. I can’t go on.
This is an epiphany of stupid for me. After this, you may not hear from me again for a while. I don’t have enough strength left to deride your ignorant questions and half-baked comments about unimportant trivia, or any of the rest of this drivel. Duh. I mean, really, stringing together a bunch of insults among a load of babbling was hardly effective.
True, these are rudimentary skills that many of us “normal” people take for granted that everyone has an easy time of mastering. But we sometimes forget that there are “challenged” persons in this world who find these things more difficult. If I had known, that this was your case then I would have never read your post. It just wouldn’t have been “right”. Sort of like parking in a handicap space. I wish you the best of luck in the emotional, and social struggles that seem to be placing such a demand on you.
You’re an idiot. A moron of the highest order. You’re so stupid it’s a wonder and a pity you can remember to breath. Intelligent ideas bounce off your head as if it were coated with teflon. Creative thoughts take alternate transportation in order to avoid even being in the same state as you. If you had an original thought it would die of loneliness before the hour was out. On an intelligence scale of 1 to 10 (10 corresponding to the highest attainable IQ) you’re rating is so far into negative numbers that one would need to travel into another quantum reality in order to even catch a distant glimpse of it.
Your personality is that of a rabid Chihuahua intent on destroying its own tail. Your powers of observation are akin to those of the bird that keeps slamming into the picture window trying to get that other bird it keeps seeing. You are walking, talking proof that you don’t have to be sentient to survive, and that Barnum was thinking of you when he uttered his immortal phrase regarding the birth of a sucker. You are, at varying times, tedious, boring, and even occasionally earth shatteringly hilarious in your idiocy, routinely childish, moronic, pathetic, wretched, disgusting and pitiful.
You are wholly without any redeeming social grace or value. If God ever decides to give the planet an enema you’d better run like the wind because anywhere you stand is a suitable place for The Insertion. There is no animal so disgusting, so vile that it deserves comparison to you, for even the lowest, dirtiest, most parasitic member of the animal kingdom fills an ecological niche. You fill no niche. To call you a parasite would be injurious and defamatory to the thousands of honest parasitic species. You are worse than vermin, for vermin do not pretend to be what it is not. You are truly human garbage. You are a fraudulent, lying, predatory charlatan. You are of less worth than a burnt-out light bulb. You will forever live in shame.
You have nothing to say, and Godwin’s Law does not apply when writing about you. You are the anti-Midas, for all that you touch becomes valueless and unusable. Mothers gather their children close when you appear. You are an aberration, a corruption, and a boil that needs to be lanced. You are a poison in need of being vomited. You are a tooth so rotten it infects the whole body. You are sperm that should have been captured in a condom and flushed down a toilet.
I don’t like you. I don’t like anybody who has as little respect for others as you do. Go away, you swine. You’re a putrescent mass, a walking vomit. You are a spineless little worm deserving nothing but the profoundest contempt. You are a jerk, a cad, and a weasel. Your life is a monument to stupidity. You are a stench, a revulsion, a big suck on a sour lemon. You are a curdled staggering mutant dwarf smeared richly with the effluvia and offal accompanying your alleged birth into this world. Meaningful to no one, abandoned by the puke-drooling, giggling beasts that sired you and then killed themselves in recognition of what they had done.
I will never get over the embarrassment of belonging to the same species as you. You are a monster, an ogre, a malformity. I wretch at the very thought of you. You have all the appeal of a paper cut. Lepers avoid you. You are vile, worthless, less than nothing. You are a weed, a fungus, and the dregs of this earth. And did I mention you smell? Monkeys look down on you. Even sheep won’t have sex with you. You are unreservedly pathetic, starved for attention, and lost in a land that reality forgot. You are a waste of flesh. On a good day you’re a halfwit. You are deficient in all that lends character. You have the personality of wallpaper. You are dank and filthy. You are asinine and benighted. You are the source of all unpleasantness. You spread misery and sorrow wherever you go.
You are a fiend and a coward, and you have bad breath. You are degenerate, noxious and depraved. I feel debased just for knowing you exist. I despise everything about you, and I wish you would go away. I cannot believe how incredibly stupid you are. The only thing worse than your logic is your manners. Maybe later in life, after you have learned to read, write, study, spell, and count, you will have more success. True, these are rudimentary skills that many of us “normal” people take for granted that everyone has an easy time of mastering. It just wouldn’t have been “right”. Sort of like parking in a handicap space. I wish you the best of luck in the emotional, and social struggles that seem to be placing such a demand on you.
You are hypocritical, greedy, violent, malevolent, vengeful, cowardly, deadly, mendacious, meretricious, loathsome, despicable, belligerent, opportunistic, barratrous, contemptible, criminal, fascistic, bigoted, racist, sexist, avaricious, tasteless, idiotic, brain-damaged, imbecilic, insane, arrogant, deceitful, demented, lame, self-righteous, byzantine, conspiratorial, satanic, fraudulent, libellous, bilious, splenetic, spastic, ignorant, clueless, illegitimate, harmful, destructive, dumb, evasive, double-talking, devious, revisionist, narrow, manipulative, paternalistic, fundamentalist, dogmatic, idolatrous, unethical, cultic, diseased, suppressive, controlling, restrictive, malignant, deceptive, dim, crazy, weird, dystrophic, stifling, uncaring, plantigrade, grim, unsympathetic, jargon-spouting, censorious, secretive, aggressive, mind-numbing, abrasive, poisonous, flagrant, self-destructive, abusive, and socially-retarded.
Shut up and go away lest you achieve the physical retribution your behaviour merits.
Thank you for your kind attention to and expected cooperation in this matter.
ded D-E-D ded
I SAID FIGHT ME NOT BORE ME
Crisp with a little bit of chew left in it.
The three words that best describe you are as follows, and I quote
“Stink, stank, stunk”!
Hey! I kept that too!
SugarFree wrote it, didnt he?
tl; dr
Hey, Broch – have a Snickers.
Needs moar gorilla warfare.
When I was a kid my mom always cooked bacon extra extra crisp. I didnt even know I liked bacon until I was in my 20s and had it cooked the proper way- chewy.
Eat like a sumo: 10,000 calorie meals, several pints of beer, four hour naps.
So… But another Saturday, then?
Just* another…
I missed the nap, I knew I was doing something wrong.
After a 3 beer lunch, I have no choice.
Heresy!
The best method is low and slow on the grill.
Cast iron griddle.
Bacon is a tool of the patriarchy. I’m so disappointed with the EU. I thought they were woke? They ain’t woke or they would have done banned the toxic masculinity of bacon. Bacon continues to oppress millions while they sit idly by. I’m not even moving to Europe now.
And English bacon sucks.
I looked it up.
https://www.myrecipes.com/extracrispy/whats-the-difference-between-american-and-british-bacon
That isnt bacon.
Limeys. They talk like fags and their bacon is all retarded.
+1 Archie Bunker
Rarely do my libertarian principles come into such harsh conflict with my personal sensibilities.
Hear Hear. I cant decide who I hate more.
Well, we know that Canadian bacon is not actually bacon, it’s some commie shit.
What is wrong with you people? Back bacon is the meaty version of bacon. It’s heavenly.
*Turns back on Gustave*
I probably shouldn’t say this because everyone probably already thinks I’m weird, but I like both.
Two type of bacon at the same time, you say? Go on….
Both are awesome together in sandwiches with mayo. Or pesto mayo.
. . .
I think I just creamed my jeans.
My grandpa was a butcher, but he retired a few years before I was born. Once upon a time I had his recipe for Farmer’s Sausage that was supposed to be the best around. But now that I’m into smoking and all that I can not find it. Sad.
It takes all kinds of critters to make Farmer Vincent’s fritters.
That just aired recently on one of the broadcast subchannels.
I would recommend buying a slicer better than my cheap Cabela’s pos.
I can tell by the pic that is the same Cabela’s pos I have. That thing pisses me off every time I try to use it. POS wasn’t cheap either so it is doubly infuriating. Good slicers are spendy.
And thanks, I am doing this as soon as I find where to buy pork belly around here.
It’s so bad that I normally slice bacon by hand but it comes out just a little too thick that way.
LEM.
Split the difference between a $100 slicer and a $700 slicer.
I want to say I spent 175 for the Cabelas pos.
For 175, it’s a guaranteed piece of shit.
At a minimum, you’re going to want a middle-of-the-road commercial grade slicer, otherwise it’s pointless.
My favorite use is Korean BBQ. Cheap cuts of meat, par frozen and sliced so ridiculously thin that they don’t taste cheap anymore.
On another forum I’m on, the popular choice is the Chef’s Choice 615. $179 on Amazon.
Intersting. The first review is exactly what I use it for: thin slicing Costco meats for asian bbq,
The blade bends and then binds up. I bought it so I could slice roasts to make jerky. but I get more uniform slices with a good knife.
Grocery? I see it in Safeway/Albertson’s types now. Or an Asian market will carry it if they carry meat.
Marukai definitely has it. Skin on.
Smoking meats is something I’ve never tried. I might need to reconsider.
I enjoy making a day of it every 2-3 months. I’ll smoke anything that gets near the Weber. Prep everything 1-2 days before. Get some bluetooth thermometers. Have your beverages lined up. Voila, smoked meats for months.
I’ll be doing this in a few weeks. Going to make the first brisket of the year and some ribs.
I have made my own bacon several times. It always comes out very good. My problem is that, around here, the price of pork belly is more than the price of store-bought bacon. I can’t figure out why that is. I mean, I live just north of Iowa, were the population of pigs exceeds the population of people.
My recent kick is home made bratwurst. I can find pork butts for $1.65 per pound.
I’d like to make wild boar bacon someday.
Store bought bacon is pumped with a sodium phosphate solution. It’s cheaper because they are able to add 25-30% (or more) in water weight.
The best bacon ever will no doubt be made from a 700 lb wild boar that you chase down on foot and stab to death with a kitchen knife. Please upload video.
Yep. After cooking it is about 35 bucks per pound
See my catahoula cur article. It is the last two videos
What brought that to mind was an episode of moonshiners where one of the guys was hunting some mean ass boar and the thing turned on him and was charging, he got one shot before it got to him, but it felled the beast. He was already drawing out his knife right after the shot, he would have probably finished it off with the knife, those guy are pretty damn hardcore crazy.
I buy mine at a restaurant supply store that’s open to the public. Some Costco’s also carry bellies.
Does it carry that big hunk of gyro meat?
No but they sell every whole muscle cut you might be looking for.
Unfortunately, my Costco sells it already sliced.
We have Cincinnati Restaurant Supply. Same idea.
And they have the giant hunk of gyro meat, too. Which reminds me, I need to get there soon.
What is the.. uh… giant hunk of gyro meat?
The blended and spiced meat you find in a gyro. Only sold in a solid 15-pound, take-home, block.
Ready to load in your vertical rotisserie? I miss shawarmas.
A vertical rotisserie is on the dream kitchen list.
Big hunk of gyro meat.
I see Alton Brown has a recipe, and I hear it’s okay to substitute ground pork. I may try it.
Im a fan of the rub he uses for the baby-back ribs.
My gyro meat is 50/50 ground beef and ground lamb.
I’m sure that pork would be good, but you’re probably going to end up with a much lighter color.
Wild pigs that I’ve killed don’t have enough fat for bacon.
That and they dont taste very good. Wild hogs eat meat and that makes them gamey. The few I’ve eaten were not very good.
I know folks who used to trap wild hogs, then pin them up and feed them chops for 6 weeks before butchering. Those were good. Unfortunantly, thats against the law now.
I got one once that was around 500 lbs, a real monster. He didn’t run. I am pretty sure he thought he was gonna bag me. Caught that sucker right in the eye with a 41 mag and he dropped like a stone. I didn’t think he would be any good but my grandmother insisted I bring him to her. I think she soaked the meat in vinegar to kill the gamey taste. That was some of the best pork I ever had.
There’s a lot of variables: age, sex (or gender?), diet, how quick the kill is, etc. The pigs I find around here tend to be smaller, so they are pretty tasty, but they are too active to be able to build up much fat. Domestic pigs, on the other hand, have an incredible amount of fat.
Mmmmmm….bacon.
for those of you who don’t like smoked meats
More smoked meat for me.
I like Bell’s 30th Anniversary beer.
Id try that. Hopefully Ill get the opportunity. We do get a lot of Oberon and Two-Hearted around here.
Tonight for dinner:
I’ve got about 3 dozen shoshito peppers. Supposedly I’m supposed to fry these in a pan and eat them whole. Fuck that mess– I’m trying to clean my kitchen. Instead I tore off the stems and them into a food processor until they turned into a pale guacamole. Into the pressure cooker with a pound of browned meat, a tablespoon of cumin and salt. If it turns out OK, I’ll call it “Chili, Rising Sun Style.”
That sounds great.
We often do them the traditional way as an app. Every once in a while, you unexpectedly come upon one with some actual heat. But not very often.
Yes, there is a lovely chile flavor, and a very mild heat.
Nihon-ryu chili is a go!
Excellent. Although I am of the “hotter the better” school as long as the flavor is there and balanced.
On the meat slicer topic. My dad used his shitty one quite often and I have heard him bitch about it a lot.
My brothers and I have mulled over buying him a good one for Christmas this year.(we got him a good smoker last year)
We would be willing to drop 5-7 hundred dollars or so for a sufficiently good one. Anybody here knowledgable enough to give a pointer or two.
What is he going to use it for?
We slaughter quite often and dad likes to makes beef jerky out of the roasts. When we do a pig, he makes bacon. He likes to smoke different things and make sandwich meat. If he had a real good one, I imagine he would find more uses for it.
If you are going to spend that kind of money consider a meat saw. I had a buddy who had one. Best thing since…well, sliced bread.
“On the meat slicer topic. My dad used his shitty one quite often and I have heard him bitch about it a lot.”
Are we not doing phrasing any more?
“On the meat slicer topic. My dad used his shitty one quite often and I have heard him bitch about it a lot.”
Are we not doing phrasing any more?
For $700 the best you could do is use your mechanic skills to rebuild an old Hobart.
Semi on topic:
Does anyone have a chamber vacuum sealer?
Yes, but we only use for “business” – Foodsaver for personal use.
So… more than impractical for my purposes?
I plan on having a commercial kitchen, but probably not until retirement.
Expensive, large footprint, not practical for home needs. Don’t all you Californians have outdoor commercial kitchens?
They are called restaurants
Eh…. sort of. Where I am, space is pretty tight. Not quite San Francisco, but not that far off either.
Right now, my family splits holiday duties. The older generation is getting on in age, and I’m really the only one in my generation that’s going to pick up the slack. A big kitchen would help in cooking a meal for 40.
In all likelihood, a big kitchen isn’t going to happen here any time soon, so the most likely scenario is a vacation house somewhere where my relatives would all want to visit. I put in an offer on a place last year, but…. didn’t take part in the bidding war.
To each his own.
*shakes head*
I would love to have two wall ovens and a big cook top on an island.
I’ve had that; didn’t love the cook-top as it was downdraft instead of a range hood. So when I re-did the kitchen in San Diego, I kept the location for the cook-top, switched it to gas and added a kick-ass hood/fan/vent. I miss that. Oh, and the first house with dual wall ovens, they were side by side instead of stacked.
We’re going to need a bigger boat.
https://youtu.be/udm5jUA-2bs
Hmmm. Why not get the Navy involved? Is a Mark 48 not enough for that shark?
No doubt OMWC cant wait.
So, there’s this rumor floating around the intertoobz that there’s a Megaladon in the deep ocean, like the Mariana trench. That’s why no one has ever seen it because it’s way down there. Of course it’s bullshit, the pressure at that depth would crush it flat. I love the intertoobz. SEA SMITH DOWN THERE BUT SURVIVE AND BY SURVIVE MEAN IF SEE MEGALADON DOWN HERE, MEGALADON GET IT TOO!
I had a limnology class and one of the things we studied is how wind can change water depth from one side of a lake by pushing the water. The best lake in the world for studying that is loch ness because is so long and skinny and the wind blows parallel to it. The school in Edinburg had take a sonar boat and pinged it from one end to the other, every cubic inch of it. Not only did they not find any monster, they found that there aren’t nearly enough fish to support such a critter.
The loch ness believers immediately started claiming that the monster must live in caves in the lake floor.
Like global warming and UFOs these monsters are always just out of sight, around the next bend, or kept secret by a cabal of evil doers.
“The loch ness believers immediately started claiming that the monster must live in caves in the lake floor.”
They must be cousins of the socialists.
My brother’s PhD is actually in limnology.
Li Bingbing?
Would.
In the Asians from Jason Statham movies category, I’m sticking with Shu Qi in The Transporter.
Mr. Lizard spotted in Miami. VIa Dave Barry:
http://blogs.herald.com/.a/6a00d83451587d69e2022ad387c08c200d-pi
I have the good fortune to have a butcher shop nearby that sells cured and uncured pork belly for bacon or smoking whole.
Today I’m smoking chicken leg/thigh and some county style ribs.
You make it back to the states all safe and sound?
No problems in travel, but I have some awful jet leg. Worse than normal.
I smoked a whole chicken last night. I haven’t baked a chicken in probably 2 years now.
Will definitely try this when I have time. I’m on grill duty tonight. Burgers. Specs: 15 people (kind of, they’re all Japanese), camping, charcoal and gas grills, ingredients limited to what I can pick up at local grocery store. What do you guys got?
I can’t remember what the name was, but when Bourdain was in Japan, the Japanese had this thing where they eat and drink until they fall down. It was amazing seeing this little guy keep up with Bourdain drinking. Japanese are crazy, Koreans too.
My wife will drink you under the table. Two kinds of Nippers: Those who get red faced sick on one glass of beer, and those who will drink ten more despite being red faced sick after one glass of beer.
“My wife will drink you under the table.”
I seriously doubt it, I have a very high tolerance to alcohol.
I had a 110 pound lady tell me that once and kept challenging me to let her prove it. I finally took her up on it. It didn’t work out too well for her even though she could drink an almost unbelievable amount for a woman that size. She was pretty sick the next morning. after having finally conceded defeat the night before. Funny enough, we went camping with some friends when that happened. She was grouchy as hell that morning, but pretty damn friendly the night before, lucky for me.
Hyperbole to be sure. I’m sure we could drink her under the table, but she’d make us earn it. Also, if she chose the drinks, it’d be wise to let her win. Last night she polished off a few tall boy chu hi’s, half a bottle of shochu and then finished with a couple high balls. That would’ve given me a ragin hangover.
“Hyperbole to be sure. I’m sure we could drink her under the table, but she’d make us earn it.”
Oh, no doubt, my little friend from Arkansas was not a quitter at all, I was not even really prepared for such a challenge. I actually tried a couple of times to tell her let’s just call it a tie before you fall down and hurt yourself and you are going to have a hangover from hell, but she was having none of it. That just made her more determined. Next morning though, she was mad as a hornet, giving me looks that kill. So it was probably my fault for not letting her win. If she hadn’t of been going on about it at work every fucking day for 2 months, I probably would have just let her win.
Im dipping my toe in the water of the Keto-diet pool, and testing it. I aim to not exceed 50g carbs/day, so I dutifully saved all mine up so I can have beer with my crack chicken.
/sad face
Crack is whack!
Crack chicken be ill af tho.
My downfall is BBQ sauce. My go-to for everything is Gates, which isn’t the sugary-est sauce ever, but those carbs still add up.
Don’t know what crack chicken is. One of those descriptors like “pulled” that doesn’t really give you any valuable information?
I use my 40 year-old stove-top pressure cooker. But essentially, fry up about 1/2 lb of bacon, dice it up, and set aside.
Into the pressure cooker goes about 3/4 cup of water, a packet of dry Ranch dressing mix, and a bar of cream cheese. Let it come to pressure, and cook with the weight just rocking for about 15 minutes. Take off the heat, and cool immediately with a quench.
Take out the breasts, and shred.
To the goo in the cooker (the chicken lost their water, + the 3/4 cup you added) dump in about 8 oz of shredded sharp cheddar. Add back the chicken and bacon, stir and enjoy.
This: https://www.adventuresofanurse.com/2016/10/04/instant-pot-crack-chicken/
“pot crack chicken”
Keep the chillins away from Tres. He’ll probably give them machine guns as well.
The US Army was dumb enough to give me one when I was just barely 18…what could possibly go wrong?
Well, I mean if they would have given you alcohol and mareequaner cigarettes at the same time, we wouldn’t have survived.
Cream cheese and ranch. Love it just to piss off purists.
I honestly dont get where the ‘crack’ part works its way in.
Its really addicting tho
As in Cracker Jack?
My gf adds some pico de gallo to crack chicken to perk it up a bit. I recommend.
Burgers spiced with pepper and salt, topped with Shoshito peppers spiced oiled and grilled, some kind of cheese, cupie mayo mixed with ketchup and some kind of picked veg.
Second mention of Shishito on this thread. I’ll give it a try. Thing is, I just know someone is going to toss some soy sauce on their burger when I’m not looking. Trying to keep that in mind.
Reminds me of the movie “Gung Ho” for some reason.
That movie, Mr Baseball and Black rain have combined to create too many false stereotypes to list.
But Kristara Barrington’s body of work is legit, right?
“The Hunted” was a documentary though, right?
Ah the days when a Chinese actress could play a Japanese character without causing an international incident.
My local sushi place has a mixed grill plate. One of the crowd pleasers is the ground pork patty yakiniku. Good with or without a bun. Grilled onions, cheese, peppers, mushrooms, lettuce… it pairs pretty well with pretty much anything.
100% pork or the pork and beef mixture? At home I use the latter because of price.
I’m actually not sure. The only thing I can tell for certain was that it was at least part pork.
Nice flavor, thought. Sweet and savory throughout.
“15 people (kind of, they’re all Japanese)”
3/5ths?
Chili made with ground shishito peppers. Really quite good.
I am making some mini calzone/green pigs in a blanket things that are green chilis stuffed with Italian sausage, caramelized onions and cheese wrapped in pizza dough since I got to drunk last night to make a pizza and settled for boiling pasta to go with the marinara I made yesterday.
I’ve yet to cure my own but regularly smoke pork belly and then give it a quick fry for some pork belly tacos
OT: I have never heard of this before in my life: Opsilon Handpan
That’s actually pretty cool. Were you searching for ‘How even non-talented people can be talented’? Asking for a friend.
Popped up in a friend’s FB feed. I thought it was beautiful. Immediately bought the track.
I only knew of the Jamaican steel drums. I didn’t know there were other sorts.
These people have completely ruined me.
Watching it, I immediately thought “un-woke white girl culturally appropriates steel-drum playing island culture”
I mean they would have developed steel in 4000 years or so, if not for white debils ruining everything.
I had a nudge of that myself, but didn’t notice till you said that.
Thanks. :/
Good grief, that was a little stressful. So my wife is in Berlin and she wanted to upgrade her flight back to a better seat. Her booking is with WOW and their upgrade scheme is sort of bizarre. She couldn’t log in or look up her booking, so she asked me to help. First of all, their website is shit. But never mind. I couldn’t find it either. So called them *cringe*. So I’ve talked to them before, but the guys accent is so strong, I’m having a little problem. So he tells me ‘it looks like the website is experiencing technical difficulty, let me help you’. So I tell him I want upgraded seats for the return trip. Now he asks me who the owner of the card is, so I tell him my wife. Then he wants information and I tell him, I don’t know what card she used. So he tells me ‘Sir, you have to make payment now’ … What the fuck? What? No problem, I’ll use one of my cards. Guy was very nice, but it just seemed sort of odd to me. Is there something special about Icelandians?
“Thank you for choosing World Of Warcraft….”
I could kill 6 boars right now, and make bacon of all of them.
Ill share some Skyline chili with you?
(sans bun, for me)
I prefer Goldstar. Goldstar FTW!
That being said, my homemade is better.
Oh. You’re one of THOSE people….
/backs away towards door
Ever one in Hamiltucky say Tres is full of shit!
+1 on the homemade Cincinnati-style “chili”.
It’s a delicious Greek/Macedonian meat sauce. I’m not sure why it came to be called chili, but whatever the fuck you call it, it’s good, especially when you make it yourself.
“Someday, let me tell you about when I did a radon survey for a Section 8 in Hamilton last year.
RIght down on Front Street, by Pershing. Something else.:Someday, let me tell you about when I did a radon survey for a Section 8 in Hamilton last year.
RIght down on Front Street, by Pershing. Something else.”
I’m all ears.
Shit sorry, misthread. As for your comment, Akira, to me the main secret ingredient to great Chili, is cumin.
Greek/Macedonian
The Greeks are triggered by your suggestion that Macedonian is not Greek.
Someday, let me tell you about when I did a radon survey for a Section 8 in Hamilton last year.
RIght down on Front Street, by Pershing. Something else.
Re: shishitos, treat them like the Spanish treat padrons. Simple fry, drain, sprinkle with coarse salt, serve in a bowl with an appropriate beverage nearby.
As Tempura, too. Tasty.
Shisitos work well too with dipping sauce. A good simple one is yogurt, dijon mustard and siracha.
BACON!!! *faints into pan