SEA SMITH GLAD TO SEE YOU. GET IT…SEA, SEE! OK, SEA SMITH WORK ON ROUTINE MORE. HE WANT TO GO TO OPEN MIC NIGHT AT CLUB. SAW SIGN FOR OPEN MIC WHEN HE GO SEE OLD BAND PLAY. THEM LOSE STEP, BUT STILL HAVE PLENTY GROUPIES TO HANG OUT WITH. BY HANG OUT WITH, MEAN RAPE. SO SEA SMITH GIVE LINKS AND GO WORK ON JOKES.
- SEA SMITH SAD FOR PEOPLE WHO HAVE RUN FROM VOLCANO. SEA SMITH PROMISE HE NO MESS WITH RESCUE AND EVACUATIONS. BY MESS WITH, MEAN RAPE. SEA SMITH GO AND STAY NEAR LAVA … BEST HOT TUBBING!
- SEA SMITH FIND JOB HE NO WANT. TOO SHOOT-Y. OR SHOULD SAY TOO SHOOT-Y AT-Y. WHATEVER IT BE, HE NO WANT.
- SEA SMITH SAY “WHAT COULD GO WRONG?” SEA SMITH THINK PLENTY. NOT IT MATTER TO SEA SMITH. HE DNA EVERYWHERE. HA! SEA SMITH MAKE A FUNNY!
- CANNOT WAIT TO GO FIND SHIP! NAME WHAT MAKE SEA SMITH LAUGH. IF HE FIND SHIP THERE BE “BLISS”. BY BLISS, MEAN RAPE. LOTS.
SEA SMITH GO NOW, LEAVE YOU ONE FINAL JOKE. WHERE SHELLFISH GO WHEN BORROW MONEY? TO PRAWN BROKER! HAHAHAHA! SEA SMITH GETTING HANG OF JOKES!
Comments
153 responses to “SEA SMITH END WEEKEND WITH EVENING LINKS”
It’s all in the wrist.
All in the fin?
I have to wonder, is Sea Smith related to Old Greg?
That’s where I learned everything I know about the funk.
That was…HMesque.
I dont makes ’em, I just shares ’em.
JFC! odd………..
What kind of racetrack? Adblock Sucks
Sup Tres!
Hey YUFUS!
Awesome gig Yesterday, We were well received, and Blew a Few minds, (Head swelling).
Many Shots of Tequila and Whiskey later, I staggered home, a great party.
I woke up with no guitar, Vape, or my Bag of tricks, and I had an early Service call, so I went over to Stefans and gathered up my gear, and found out a large fight broke out about 1AM, with Riot Cops and Shotguns! One guy went to the hospital and one guy went to jail, I was fast asleep by then, Thank God.
/A short version of events
That’s what I was thinking. Dirt, turf, or steeplechase?
Go-karts, it appears, in the film clip in the linked post.
COOL! i love go karts!
Darnit, Swiss. Ignorance was bliss.
Stay off of cruise ships. Unless you like cruise ships. And in that case, please don’t leave cruise ships. They are full of sadness and fail.
Huh, the brochure said full of food, booze and fun?
Cruise ships are perfect for the Swiss.
Hmph. My childhood told me that cruise ships are full of adventure and romance.
…and love, won’t hurt any more.
My experience on a Caribbean cruise on the Chicken of the Sea bears out these words of wisdom. I tried to tie together empty drums to fashion a raft to escape to Cuba.
Don’t you dare steal that trademark.
“Boy, 13, who fractured his skull in seven places is hailed as a miracle child for ‘coming back to life’ after doctors predicted he would be a ‘vegetable’ and his parents signed papers to donate his organs”
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-5697063/Boy-comes-life-parents-sign-papers-donate-organs.html
Good thing he wasn’t in England.
The NHS would have smothered him with a pillow.
It’s like the Mail is trolling. Bravo.
Bio-ethicists look to expand their roster of reasons and justifications to kill people.
Even *if* he survives, do you really want a kid with a skull fractured in seven places? Think of his future. Kids at school can be merciless with their bullying.
God damn England and NHS.
“Celebrities round on DJ Khaled after he reveals he would never perform oral sex on his wife”
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-5696699/Celebs-round-DJ-Khaled-reveals-never-perform-oral-sex-wife.html
The SPLC applauds his refusal to appropriate Mexican culture by eating tacos.
Bravo, sir, bravo.
“It’s (going to be) extraordinarily useful to law enforcement everywhere.”
Cuz being useful to law enforcement is what’s most important.
Stay off of cruise ships.
Words to live by.
Count Dankula’s Speech At Day For Freedom
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-93pOkVdaTI
Bad, bad Potato! Start my morning with blaring bagpipes? *Whips out peeler*
Bagpipes are a violation of the NAP.
“naps are awesome”
https://twitter.com/kanyewest/status/993212368225124353
Great speech once you get past the bagpipes.
I clicked just for the bagpipes.
What’w Wrong with bagpipes? It’s not like they’re used in polka.
“Celebrities round on DJ Khaled after he reveals he would never perform oral sex on his wife”
I wouldn’t care even if I knew who “D J Khaleed” was. Unless he’s that idiot mayor of London.
Bring back Boris!
Although no fatalities have been reported, officials say lava spurting into the residential neighborhood has destroyed at least five homes.
No homo.
How dare you either assume gender or sexual preference of Mother Nature, you shitlord.
Up to 26 homes destroyed by sunset in Hawaii. None of this should be a surprise if you build your home on the slopes of a huge shield volcano which has been erupting non stop since 1983.
As a follow-up, more Old Greg and the story of the funk.
Mostly historically accurate.
“Woman Made Necklace From Labia For Inspiring Reason”
https://www.teenvogue.com/story/labia-necklace
Oh my God.
Something about that story just doesn’t smell right…..
Next MLW Fake Teen Vogue Cover?
I had a girlfriend that had that condition, not the cyst though. Very sensitive.
If you say you didn’t click on the “How to masturbate if you have a vagina” link at the bottom, you’re a damned liar.
I didn’t see that, thanks.
..
Does it become about something other than politics? What if I feel that sex education doesn’t belong in schools at all, let alone “medically accurate, which means scientifically based” sex ed?
No, no, no, no, no!!!!!
https://media.giphy.com/media/oLHaxZoXbcU6Y/giphy.gif
Maybe covered already, but: McCain doesn’t want Trump at funeral, friends tell White House
“I wasn’t planning on it.”
Wouldn’t it be great to bury both of them at once?
“I’m not going to the funeral. I do plan to go dance on his grave afterwards though.”
I wouldn’t want to go to that scumbag’s funeral, anyway.
“Most of the festivities surrounding #CincodeMayo in the US are textbook examples of cultural appropriation, relegating the history and culture of Mexican people to novelty items. Mexican culture cannot be reduced to tacos, oversized sombreros and piñatas.”
https://twitter.com/splcenter/status/992886675452977152
So you are saying you need to add tequila and jumper cables?
Don’t forget the cocaine.
And copious amounts of Catholic iconography with the Virgin heavily represented.
Just another day in Playa Del Carmen.
Specially in candles.
Heh, I passed this joint earlier today and that exact scene was playing out in front.
Rhywun, your asteroid book and my asteroid book use the same asteroid.
I have no idea what that means but OK.
In some cultures, it means you and Tulip are now legally married.
Simple Justice has a good take on this.
https://blog.simplejustice.us/2018/05/06/seis-de-mayo/
I never cared for celebrating Cinco de Mayo (because I’m a Maximillion and Napoleon III fan), but this past year I culturally appropriated the shit out of the holiday
This would be a good tweet to save for the next time someone acts like the SPLC is a serious organization that should be listened to.
textbook examples of cultural appropriation
If only there were some sort of government agency which could issue temporary use permits for legitimate adaptations of foreign or aboriginal culture. Maybe that would help.
I was against book burning until I read that.
And copious amounts of Catholic iconography with the Virgin heavily represented.
Needz moar buxom Aztecs.
On black velvet.
In that little boy’s smile?
You look like an Allanah Mhyles fan.
Not a fan (or hater); it’s more that the song was a hit my senior year of high school, which is why I have such vivid memories of it.
People close to Sen. John McCain have told the White House that the ailing Arizona Republican does not want President Donald Trump to attend his funeral
“Fuck him. Why should I go to his funeral? He’s not coming to mine.”
I’ve got the Culligan commercial song stuck in my head. It makes me want to go to Vietnam and drop napalm with abandon. Here, join me..
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=FkUVaFrF4f8
Hey Culligan Man!!!!!
I was expecting something more along the lines of this.
Will. Not. Click.
Yusef! Next time you go to Slab City, take a picture of yourself with a bindle.
Also, it might be the alcohol, but I’m finding this surprisingly relaxing.
I’m going next week and I studied The Fool, I have a great idea for the Tarot card, base on your idea,
Yippee!
That was fun.
The ’70s were the shittiest decade. It even had the shittiest war.
Yom Kippur? Yeah, that was kind of a drag after the thrills of the Six Day War.
I lost my virginity in the 70s. The decade wasn’t that bad.
Dammit HM. That made me puke. No kidding.
“Authorities had searched unsuccessfully for the killer for decades, but made a breakthrough when they uploaded the DNA profile of the killer to a public genealogy website and found matches with several relatives.”
/Police gather around the computer screen to process DNA.
Cop 1: We’re gonna get the son of a bitch.
Cop 2: Yeh.
Screen shop settles on former cop DeAngelo.
Cops: D’oh!
Well I was busy all weekend out of town helping my folks move – worked out pretty well overall. Slowly getting over my poison ivy from two weeks ago (went outside when I got home today and went nuts with the Round-Up just to be safe).
Didn’t have a lot of time for random crap this weekend, but I did whip up a quick comic video – some great indie titles came out last week (although I completely missed Free Comic Book Day on Saturday, my local supplier said he’d hold a couple issues for me): https://youtu.be/owgLNcehGbs Worth your time if you’re into weird, crazy stuff like me – something for everyone.
Checking to see if there is an appetite for a piece on Tora-san here at Glibs. I went to the Tora san museum yesterday and took some pics. My favorite Tora-san episode is the one where he falls in love with a mentally retarded lady. For some reason, it wasn’t creepy at all. Any thoughts on the man?
Read a couple reviews at dvdtalk.com (ie. https://www.dvdtalk.com/reviews/40750/tora-san-collectors-set-1/) that look interesting – but it’d be more interesting to hear it from your localized perspective.
I’m just a casual fan, but the older I get the more I’m enjoying his antics. Don’t know if he’s even known by the average westerner.
Still haven’t watched them yet, but I might add a couple to my netflix disc queue.
I know nothing about the man, other than reading this link. 100% interested in a piece.
Hope all well with you- have been following your camping (glamping?) adventures.
Thanks, RH. Back to work today. Half way through Harsh Mistress. Good stuff. Roadz!
I like the part where he goes back in time, gives birth to himself, slaughters a bunch of giant space bugs, then picks up a baby bug who is following him, raises it as his own child and sibling, then goes forward in time to when it’s an adult and he can legally fuck both it and himself.
Wow, a nice concise poke at every Heinlein novel (or at least the later ones). Well done.
Never heard of him until just now, but I really enjoy Glibs’ explorations. Particularly of things I know nothing about.
He’s a loser in love, heavy drinker with a loose tongue. Glibs need to give him an honorary degree.
Ugh, I’m already living that life.
Sure, yes! If it totally sucks (which is highly unlikely), it’ll just get off topic snark. Well, probably will anyways.
Never heard of the series before. Reminds me a little of the Carry On movies.
Tora-san and Maude?
A little late to the party, but, yeah! I’ve only watched the first two films, but I find them light and enjoyable.
To this day, when posing for a photo, I’m tempted to say, “Buttaaaahhhhh”, but I know I’d have to explain that and it would take too long.
This is a Fucking Great Beer! Belching Beaver Peanut Butter Milk Stout, My Mind is Blown!
/but you knew that
https://photos.app.goo.gl/WVLCGef3Cfjs4B1l1
Leave it to the hacks at NPR to fail to identify the real villains: the graybeards at NASA, for getting the bright idea to have the Internet decide the fate of these innocent children.
Using internet racists as steroids to boost a story. See, racism is everywhere. The internet proves it.
I hate You! and You! and You and You! every body gets Hated!
did I do it right?
Yes, you did.
Nice crystallization of everything I hate about America ca. 2018.
Listening to the septagenarian condemning 4chan made me giggle.
“The 17-year-olds, all juniors at Benjamin Banneker High School in Washington, D.C., created a simple way using copper shards, drinking straws and filter floss — simple, though I am not smart enough to understand it — to demonstrate how to purify water in school drinking fountains that may be contaminated by lead.”
Because readily available filters don’t work? And, schools are providing lead-contaminated drinking water?
I’m aligned, NASA sucks for setting-up this nonsense.
I’m sure it’s only the poor schools like in DC – you know, the ones where they only spend $20,000+ a year per student.
Most of these “mythbustings” are even dumber than the myths they bust. Did you know that “real Mexicans”–no, I’m sorry, “all Hispanics“–do not cook their food on stoves? Or that “true Mexican food is not cheap”–Mexico having been historically settled mostly by exiled Kuwaitis and Luxembourgeois?
Oddly enough, this one does not repeat the almost universal myth that fried-shell tacos are not “authentic,” instead correctly only saying they are much less common.
Good lord that’s tedious. I’ve suffered through the same version of why we don’t know what Chinese food is, too. It’s almost like immigrants adapting their food to American tastes is something to be ashamed of.
I take it Glibs already covered this a long time ago, no? Otherwise I am sorely disappointed.
Oh yes, complete with hot/crazy line discussion.
I feel like she’s misunderstood and i can be the man who can fix her
As long as she keeps the clown thing
This is way too dumb to wait until the morning links to post, so here ya go:
More on “central planning is stupid”. Or “why the federal government shouldn’t be in charge”. Or pick your interpretation:
Horses are an invasive species in the west. And they are overpopulated. And dying in bunches. There population needs to be cut way, way back. But whatever we do, we must not kill a horse:
Opening scene of Billy Jack – I cry every time. Later – pure rage.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aaqLRS81XtY
Little girls like horses. This seems like a problem with an obvious solution.
they’ve tried “adoption” programs a couple of time with no success. The horses are real shit – parasite ridden and full of other maladies. They’ve also grew up wild so they don’t do the ” My Little Pony” thing very well. Horse people are also even snobbier than dog show people about their animals’ pedigree.
Heh I was only joking.
Yeah, I believe that. Same problems with feral cats.
Can you do anything with those horses then? Seems a waste but you make it seem like their use would be limited. Certainly not suitable for putting into any kind of feed, e.g., presumably.
Horse https://youtu.be/bakD9PpiK0k
The Horse
…and what was he doing?
A favorite of high school pep bands across this nation. Gets the crowd riled up pretty good.
That song has dirty, nasty and vulgar feel. Love it.
Hunt both horses and little girls?
Or let the horses hunt the little girls?
Did this Begaye hack even give a reason for canceling the hunt? I can’t find one in either article. My suspicion is he wasn’t getting any takers for the fucking things, and he cancelled out of embarrassment.
I think I found a solution.
Um.
So the injuns killed them off, and the Europeans reintroduced them. Sounds like the EPA to me.
Early man was a fucking walking spirit of death. He would put the worst modern Captain Planet villain to shame. African animals could deal because we were from there. But the further and more isolated the place we arrived at, the less was left standing in our wake. Australia, and the Americas especially, were once teeming with megafauna diversity that barely survived much after our arrival.
Also, no, I never animated a commercial; I just started animating a few months ago. But I have directed/edited commercials.
Another pundit on Fox just evoked 9/11! Thank god they keep bringing it up, otherwise I’d forget when it happened.
It happened in A.D. 2001 in New York City, New York. The 9/11 observance commemorates the destruction of the original World Trade Center towers on that day by Islamic extremists using hijacked commercial airliners. It is a myth that it is American Independence Day; that is July 4.
Independence Day, that’s when we beat them aliens with a Mac virus. We smoke cigars on that day in celebration of Jeff Goldblum.
Re: Teen Vogue‘s “How to Masturbate If You Have a Vagina”: How has this not become a meme yet? Like, someone tweets something, whatever, and people tweet back a link to that article?
If Robbie thinks it’s only “internet tough guys” that would protect their daughters, he should try a little street experiment.
Robby just reached fucking moron in my mind. I didn’t follow him much at reason, so I know it seems like in behind the curve, but seriously. Does he think father’s are making sure guys don’t forget to open the door for girls? Or is he arguing that a dad shouldn’t threaten rapists because “your daughter isn’t your property”?
Not enough of you are following me on the twatter; you can get fun tidbits like this.
Classy ladies with painted on dresses.
http://archive.is/4i2AY
Good Lord #17.
I’m more of a girl next door kinda guy. They’re all a bit to risque for me.
My goodness.
If you were following me on Tweeter; you would have seen this as well.
I haven’t made meatloaf for dinner lately.
@*&^$#%^! burglar alarm went off at 2:00 am, so now I’m at work after having met the cops here.
It’s going to be a long day.
Rosie O’Donnel was brought up yesterday. Dude who was sentenced five years probation, 8 months detention for fewer violations chimes in.
https://twitter.com/DineshDSouza/status/993124792839692290
Not exactly apples to apples comparison since DSouza was making straw donations under other peoples names, but a violation is a violation. Or is it?
But democrats do it for the Greater Good so it’s ok
What up? We’re rhree
Why am I fucking awake??
You get more out of it than when you do it in your sleep?