Thursday Afternoon Links – Bird and Bone edition

Banquet Salisbury steaks recalled for bone contamination

Conagra Brands has issued a recall for Banquet Salisbury steaks that may be contaminated by foreign material.

According to the USDA, about 135,159 pounds of Salisbury steak products may contain “extraneous materials, specifically bone.”

Bone contamination. Sounds like a very awkward sexual innuendo a biologist came up with.

“So, did you get lucky with that girl at the bar last night?”

“Oh, yeah. She came down with a severe case of bone contamination.”

Slate culls some choice cuts from the Banquet user review site for us:

“The amount of bones in every piece we considered disgusting.”

“We were sadly disappointed that the Salisbury steaks were not edible because of the bones.”

“Me and my wife couldn’t make it through a single steak because of the amount of bones.”


The Hate Birds That Hate are just lonely and lashing out:

Lonely goose runs a fowl, causing chaos in DeBary neighborhood

For weeks, some neighbors said the goose has been nothing but trouble, chasing people and damaging property. Leah Jones Digges took cellphone video of the goose that she said ripped apart her neighbor’s window screens.”He’s also broken several windows,” Digges said. “You can’t even sit out in your yard in peace anymore because of this guy.”

Resident Jennifer Gesule said the goose will also go after neighborhood kids.

“He usually follows the kids home from the bus stop or he tries to attack everyone who is at the bus stop,” she said.

However, residents said the goose wasn’t always so fowl.

“He had a friend and then the friend passed,” Gesule said. “I don’t know what happened with the friend, but his friend died and that’s when the goose went a little bit crazy.”

Of course they are going to act this way with the so-called Mainstream Media giving them cover.


Sometimes a picture does say a thousand words… classy words…

Caption Contest, of course. Winner gets his home address posted on Woodser, the dating site for lonely Bigfeet.

And you can read the story, too, I guess, you know, if you want.


Louisana State Senate President John A. Alario, Jr.

Louisiana law to ban sex with animals wins Senate vote 25 – 10

The state Senate has approved a bill designed to make it clear that bestiality is illegal in Louisiana.

A law on the books prohibits “crimes against nature,” but it also outlaws so-called sodomy and was ruled unconstitutional in 2003.

New Orleans Senator JP Morrell says it’s important that the state has a way to arrest someone for having sex with animals.

He told fellow lawmakers, “God forbid you vote against this bill, good luck explaining it.”

Ten senators did vote against it.

The measure does also specify that previously illegal forms of “sodomy” are no longer against the law.

“Anal sexual intercourse between two human beings shall not be deemed as a crime,” part of the bill states.

The measure now heads to the House of Representatives.

Those 10 brave pervert hold-outs?

John A. Alario, Jr. (R)
Bret Allain (R)
Dan Claitor (R)
Jack Donahue (R)
James R. Fannin (R)
Ryan Gatti (R)
Gerald Long (R)
Beth Mizell (R)
Jonathan Perry (R)
Neil Riser (R)

One party is clearly dedicated to protecting your rights to have sex with animals and the other wants to strip you of these freedoms. Vote accordingly this November.

Also, it’s now a butt-loving paradise in The Pelican State, y’all! I have a great idea for a Lousiana license plate:

Anal Sex: It’s Not Just For Alabamans Anymore



And some music to help you wash that down…

Comments

467 responses to “Thursday Afternoon Links – Bird and Bone edition”

  1. The Late P Brooks

    Odious grandstanding douchebag does what he does best

    As Vitter testified in front of the Senate Judiciary Committee, Sen. Richard Blumenthal (D-Conn.) asked her if she thought Brown v. Board of Education “was correctly decided.”

    “Senator, I don’t mean to be coy, but I think I get into a difficult area when I start commenting on Supreme Court decisions — which are correctly decided and which I may disagree with,” Vitter responded.

    “Again, my personal, political or religious views I would set aside. That is Supreme Court precedent. It is binding. If I were honored to be confirmed, I would be bound by it and of course I would uphold it.”

    But Blumenthal pressed Vitter by repeating the question.

    Christ, what an asshole. I blame Number 6.

    1. Chipwooder

      She should have asked Dick why he was confused as to whether Connecticut is in Vietnam.

    2. R C Dean

      Sounds like a boneheaded way of saying “It doesn’t matter what my views are on settled precedent. Its settled, therefor I will follow it.” Because I’m an ass, I probably would have continued “Perhaps when I am nominated to the Supreme Court we can discuss what Supreme Court precedent I would vote to modify or overturn.”

    3. Number.6

      Blumenthal is an Olympic-level shitstain, even by this tawdry, feculent state’s standards.

    4. juris imprudent

      The correct reply was “Senator, are you familiar with Harlan’s dissent in Plessy? Had the Court followed his logic and conscience, there never would’ve been a Brown v. Board. You do know what I’m talking about Senator?”

  2. TK

    Re: The Bone Contamination Story

    I literally had that exact frozen dish for lunch today. I’ve been bone contaminated, and now I feel… shame, mostly.

    1. Stinky Wizzleteats

      Banquet meals are rank, they taste like someone ate a Stouffers, yacked it back into the tray, and stuck it in a box. They’re the Nick Gillespie of frozen meals.

      1. TK

        Yeah it was gross but they were 75% off!

        1. creech

          One resort hotel (((guest))) to (((another))): “The food served here is terrible.”
          (((other guest))) “Yeah, and the portions are so small.”

      2. invisible finger

        Caption:

        “Fuckin’ Canada Geese.”

        1. juris imprudent

          Still not legal in Louisiana.

      1. TK

        Gonna have to use that line next time I’m in the freezer isle.

  3. Caption Contest

    Why is the White House Listing?

    1. JaimeRoberto

      “Next time I dine with Romney, I’m going to force him to order the Salisbury steak.”

    2. A Leap at the Wheel

      While all the other boys scampered about and played stick ball outside, little Donny Trump had to stay inside and write “I will not expand gun control” six hundred times.

    3. Bobarian LMD

      “This would be a good place for a golf course… And a casino”

      1. Jarflax

        If he did this I would vote to repeal the XXIInd Amendment.

  4. F. Stupidity Jr.

    Lonely goose runs a fowl

    *smirks, gives writer the eyebrows-and-nod approval combo*

  5. Bobarian LMD

    That steak had so much bone in it, only your Mom could love it.

  6. TK

    Afternoon gaming lynk:

    Valve (Owner of Steam) changed its policies in wake of Facebook scandal (although its hasn’t been officially confirmed if the changes were influenced by the Facebook scandal).

    As this threat looms, Valve Software has announced this week that it is beefing up its security policies on its Steam PC gaming distribution service.

    …Valve announced that it is now hiding the contents of your game library by default. You can also hide details about your activity — like how many hours you’ve spent playing adult visual novels (live your truth!). This data had been public, and it was easily accessible by third parties using the official Steam API tool. That’s what powered services like the PC-game ownership-tracking website Steam Spy, which is shutting down due to this change, according to its owner.

    …Steam Spy provided high-level insights into how people buy and play games on Valve’s service, but it’s possible that someone else could use that exact same information to build targeted advertising profiles for individuals. No one has done that yet, but little was stopping bad actors from doing this in the future.

    So if an advertiser decides to use my gameplay data from Steam, they might be able to.. advertise more effectively to me? (gasp!) I don’t get the attitude that advertisers are somehow “bad actors” for using the tools legally available to them. I find ads less annoying when they’re for shit I actually care about. YouTube almost exclusively gives me ads for conservative groups, movies and video games. What’s so bad about that?

    I have an ex-roommate that used to flip out about advertisers. When I asked him why it’s such a big deal – he said that he’s “very susceptible to advertisements.” He explained that he has a hard time resisting the purchase of a product that has been well advertised to him. I simply don’t understand this.

    1. I find people advertising things I want to be even more obnoxious – because I have a policy of not buying something if I can remember seeing an ad for it recently (doubly so if that ad was annoying).

      Though the option to have more granularity in what game information is public is something I wondered about a while back.

    2. Bobarian LMD

      YouTube almost exclusively gives me ads for conservative groups, movies and video games. What’s so bad about that?

      Google is making money off it?

    3. mexican sharpshooter

      He explained that he has a hard time resisting the purchase of a product that has been well advertised to him.

      I feel sorry your roommate is that weak-minded.

      1. TK

        Ha! Classic

    4. R C Dean

      adult visual novels

      I am not sure what this is a reference to.

      1. Brett L

        Gamified cartoon porn would be my uneducated guess. When I get off the work computer tonight, I’ll edumacate myself.

      2. Playa Manhattan

        I don’t know, but it sounds like Choose Your Own Adventure porn.

        1. Pan Zagloba

          Pretty much, sometimes slightly more involved, with stats and shit, sometimes even less, just text and images you read like an actual novel. But mostly that.

      3. A Leap at the Wheel

        Comic books that you read online, often involving sexually mature people/cephalopods inserting things into other sexually mature people/cephalopods. Then removing those things. Then inserting them. etc. Sometimes those things are physical elements of said sexually mature people/cephalopods. See, eg, Kurt Eichenwald.

        1. Bobarian LMD

          See, eg, Kurt Eichenwald.

          I thought you said ‘mature’?

    5. Jarflax

      The only targeted ads I find offensive are the Google ones that pop up around gmail. I email a client LLC documents so Google decides to advertise legal zoom to my client! Damn it how can I properly rent seek if you go and tell my clients about options? Oh wait… I don’t really care at all

    6. commodious spittoon

      Is it possible that, I don’t know, he’s being well advertised shit he actually wants or needs?

      If I have to consume ads as the cost for using a free platform like YouTube or Steam I want the content to matter to me. I don’t want Steam attempting to sell me on dating sims. Shooters, yes. JRPGs, no.

  7. The Late P Brooks

    Caption:

    The view from Trump Tower is better.

    1. Tulip

      Winner

  8. Playa Manhattan

    “According to the USDA, about 135,159 pounds of Salisbury steak products may contain “extraneous materials, specifically bone.”

    I just assumed that there was bone in it already.

    1. SugarFree

      Bone-in ribeye, Bone-in pork chop. Bone-in Salisbury steak.

      I really don’t see what the problem is here.

    2. RAHeinlein

      Two words: Mechanically Separated.

      This is what happens when you don’t have LFTB available.

      1. Playa Manhattan

        Damned if you do, damned if you don’t.

        /pink slime

      2. Bobarian LMD

        LFTB — I know what LTB are, but is the acronym now using Fag?

        1. RAHeinlein

          LFTB = lean finely textured beef

          I have no idea what the rest of your sentence means…

          1. Bobarian LMD

            LGBT…

      3. Lower Future Trouble Back?

      4. nw

        I’ve wondered what the alternative is. Chemically separated? Doesn’t
        seem like an improvement.

  9. Caption:

    “I can’t believe I forgot to put on my Depends”

    1. Gordilocks

      “I can’t believe I forgot to The Hat and The Hair didn’t put on my Depends”

  10. Caput Lupinum

    New Orleans Senator JP Morrell says it’s important that the state has a way to arrest someone for having sex with animals.

    Mae’r defaid yn llawenhau, mae’r ffermwr yn crio.

    1. Enough About Palin

      Now THAT’S funny!

  11. mexican sharpshooter

    The Hate Birds That Hate are just lonely and lashing out:

    Thankfully the local weather has turned and those filthy Canadians went home.

    1. SugarFree

      I’ve always said we were building the wall on the wrong border.

    2. Juvenile Bluster

      Everything about summer here sucks except that there are no Canadians left around.

  12. Just knowing that there are tits in the world like this makes life worth living.

    http://archive.is/ahvPN

    10, 11, 14, 18, 29, 36, 38.

    1. Fishnets are like tattoos – they take something attractive and turn it ugly. At least you can get her to take off the fishnets.

      1. Chafed

        You, sir, are a monster. For the fishnets remark. You are right about tattoos.

      2. Trigger Hippie

        Fishnets AND tattoos for me, please.

        1. Mad Scientist

          Same here. I’ll take ’em happily.

      3. Number.6

        Fishnets are a fucking huge “LOOK AT ME!”

        If the view is worth looking at, I’m all for ’em.

    2. Sour Kraut

      19 Looks like Emily Ratajkowski.

      I like 16 but if I can have all three in 23, that’s a higher total.

      1. Greater total boob volume.

      2. slumbrew

        I’m certain 19 _is_ EmRat (pic is maybe a few years old?).

        #14 for me, please.

        1. I’m a well-established breast man, but 14 has spectacular gams.

        2. But Enough About Me

          #14 is indeed very striking.

    3. Homple

      23 and me.

    4. Rasilio

      How can you pass on #7 when she has clearly demonstrated her sandwich making skills

      1. slumbrew

        The sandwich-making is a strong plus.

  13. Raston Bot

    WaPo let one slip through the cracks..

    https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/made-by-history/wp/2018/04/11/why-killer-mike-is-right-african-americans-should-own-guns/?utm_term=.7205f79b98ba

    In his NRATV interview and subsequent apology, Killer Mike highlighted the importance of having a serious and sustained national conversation about black gun ownership in the United States. Wherever one stands on the issue of gun ownership, one must wrestle with the reality that firearms policy has for hundreds of years served to regulate the bodies and movement of people of color and indigenous people. Arming themselves has helped African Americans escape subjugation and enjoy the equal rights promised to them by the law. Given the fierce resistance to gun control, Killer Mike just might be onto something.

    1. Libertarian Moment™

    2. R C Dean

      firearms policy has for hundreds of years served to regulate the bodies and movement of people of color and indigenous people.

      Allah give me patience, but I am sick to death of this trope of calling people “bodies”. In this sentence, it is particularly stupid, as firearms policy doesn’t actually regulate your body at all. Of course, it doesn’t really regulate your movement, either (although it regulates what you can have while you’re moving around). Although I applaud the authors for pointing out that gun control is one of the last vestiges of Jim Crow, I have to believe based in that sentence that neither of them is very smart.

      1. Scruffy Nerfherder

        They use it because they want to connote the idea that they are seen as non-human. It’s an annoying trend.

        1. A Leap at the Wheel

          Its worse than that. It actually started out as an incredibly sharp and insightful critique of US chattel slavery. Field work literaly breaks the body of the slave, blistering the hands, breaking the back, and burning the skin. These slaves were capital investments purchased for the mechanical action of extracting a grain or cotton from a plant and putting it in a bag the same way a barrel is a capital investment to perform a mechanical action.

          So not only is it slavery, its the most dehumanizing kind. This is no paedago′gus tutor teaching Pliny the Elder about Greece, a respected and valued part of the family. US chattel slaver made men into shovels.

          As an insightful and cutting observation, it became very popular. As a popular turn of phrase, it is used by idiots who don’t grasp the implication of it, and now toss it around as a signal to show they’ve pledged allegiance to tribe of people who read Ta Nehisi Coates and don’t think too hard.

          1. R C Dean

            The fact that they dehumanize the people they claim to be fighting for just boggles the mind. They are telling us what I suspect is an inadvertant truth: They see minorities as objects, not as people. Of course, they see everyone as objects, not as people with inherent rights and agency, so this shouldn’t be a surprise.

      2. Playa Manhattan

        My body, my choice!

    3. BakedPenguin

      Hey RB, OT- I read your post about your dad. As someone who just lost a parent, I wanted to convey my sympathy.

  14. mexican sharpshooter

    Caption Contest

    It’s been 10 minutes. Where’s my Double Quarter Pounder?

  15. Tundra

    Caption:

    How the hell did Biden get back in here?

    1. He’s waiting to fight him.

      1. slumbrew

        ^ winnah!

  16. Rufus the Monocled

    Rufus has small feet so Rufus is out of the caption contest. But if Rufus has bigger feet Rufus would probably go with:

    ‘Are those Mexican landscapers legit?’

  17. But Enough About Me

    “Bone contamination”

    Man, I am so stealing this one.

  18. Bobarian LMD

    Anal sexual intercourse between two human beings shall not be deemed as a crime,” part of the bill states.

    STEVE NOT SURE HOW HIM FEEL ABOUT THIS. IF HIM USE TWO HUMANS AT ONCE, AM HIM STILL OK?

    STEVE LIKE HAVING MARDI GRAS PARTY.

    1. STEVE_SMITH

      STEVE SMITH MORE OF ONE-AT-A-TIME RAPESQUATCH. JUST MANY, MANY, MANY, MANY ONES.

    2. Mad Scientist

      WHAT IF HUMAN DIE DURING RAPE? AMS STEVE SMITH STILL RAPING HUMAN OR DESECRATING CORPSE? ALSO, NOT SURE STEVE SMITH IS HUMAN IN FIRST PLACE. BUT GUESS NOT MATTER. IF COME TO ARREST STEVE SMITH, STEVE SMITH COOPERATE WITH ARRESTERS. BY COOPERATE MEAN RAPE.

    3. R C Dean

      I think they just legalized anal rape with that sentence, on account of it applies to all anal intercourse, not just the consensual kind.

      1. slumbrew

        That was my first thought as well; unless “intercourse” is by definition consensual?

        1. R C Dean

          I think the definition now is intercourse without lawful consent.

          1. Bobarian LMD

            What is a four letter word, ending in k, that means intercourse?

            Talk.

          2. KibbledKristen

            Pork?

          3. egould310

            Bonk

          4. egould310

            Dink

          5. C. Anacreon

            Grok

          6. juris imprudent

            Punk?

    4. creech

      Jerry Sandusky approves.

    5. Grumbletarian

      Libertarian Moment!

  19. Caption Contest

    Didn’t I fire that guy last week?

    1. straffinrun

      The reflection in the window?

  20. Playa Manhattan

    Apparently, there’s some park in London where the pelicans do that all the time, which is odd because pelicans are obligate piscivores.

    1. SugarFree

      The heart wants what the heart wants.

    2. Jarflax

      I always thought there was something fishy about those damn pigeons!

    3. Tulip

      That video is horrifying. Note to self, never click on Sugarfree videos.

  21. Caption:

    I don’t have a caption but I can’t help but think this song is playing softly in the background.

      1. Gilmore

        I take some small pride in never having listened to a single Sonic Youth song the entire way through.

        there’s almost no one i can say that about. and i don’t even *dislike* them.

    1. Since the last thread is probably dying, I hope you appreciate this.

  22. PBRstreetgang

    Caption: *quietly singing*
    “Hangin’ around
    Nothing to do but frown
    Rainy days and Mondays…always get me down….”

  23. I never knew pelicans were so revolting.

    “Cannibalism of chicks of their own species is known from the Australian, brown and Peruvian pelicans.”

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pelican#Feeding

    1. SugarFree

      I learned a lot of horrifying things putting this post together.

      Like what baby pigeons look like:

      1. Sea urchins from Chernobyl.

      2. Playa Manhattan

        Mmmmm…. Cornish Game Pigeon.

        1. SugarFree

          That’s all squab is.

  24. Drake

    “Fuck I’m Awesome”

  25. kinnath

    Caption:

    When I find myself in times of trouble . . . . . . . .

  26. Tonio

    Caption contest entry:

    “Is that Steve Bannon or just one of the regular Washington hobos?”

    1. PBRstreetgang

      Nice

      1. BakedPenguin

        Second.

  27. LJW

    Caption Contest

    If I don’t move the protestors outside can’t see me.

  28. Chipwooder

    Caption: It’s been twenty minutes – where the fuck is Kushner with my Diet Coke?

  29. Scruffy Nerfherder

    Caption:

    I told Lewandowski that Hicks was gone, but that dumbass is hiding in the bushes again.

  30. Stinky Wizzleteats

    YouTube personality Styxhexenhammer666 announces his candidacy for Governor of Vermont on a pro-gun, pro drug legalization platform. Couldn’t be worse than what they have now.

    https://youtu.be/j-Q8t7K6Sas

    1. F. Stupidity Jr.

      I can’t wait until the gubernatorial debate, where he takes 20 minutes to answer a single question, pausing only to stir and sip his drink.

      1. Stinky Wizzleteats

        If he does it without a shirt I’m going to find a way to vote for him.

    2. straffinrun

      *Vigorously clinks coffee cup with spoon*

    3. Raston Bot

      and encourage the abolition of super PACs and corporate campaign donations to try and save our Republic.

      one of these things is not like the other
      one of these things doesn’t belong

      1. Stinky Wizzleteats

        Doesn’t quite pass the purity test does he?

      2. R C Dean

        Corporations already can’t make campaign donations. That’s what PACs are for – to allow corporations to have a separate fund/mechanism for bundling campaign contributions from other people.

  31. TK

    Caption:

    “Mayor Stanback sure has done well with the place”

    1. Tonio

      Obscure, but I like it.

      1. TK

        I feel validated. 🙂 I wasn’t sure if anyone would pick up the reference to today’s earlier glib comments.

  32. Caption:

    I wish I were Kevin Spacey.

  33. Scruffy Nerfherder

    Caption:

    If I pretend I don’t notice him, maybe Pence will take his mid-afternoon prayer group to his own office.

  34. The Late P Brooks

    whoopsie

    The National Transportation Safety Board stripped Tesla Inc. of its role in an investigation of a fatal crash involving one of its vehicles, saying the electric-car maker failed to abide by an agreement not to disclose information while the probe was underway.

    “While we understand the demand for information that parties face during an NTSB investigation, uncoordinated releases of incomplete information do not further transportation safety or serve the public interest,” NTSB Chairman Robert Sumwalt said in a statement.

    He relayed the decision Wednesday night in a call to Tesla’s Elon Musk, he said.

    The unusual move followed public statements by the company blaming the driver of a Tesla Model X who died in a March collision, in apparent violation of agency protocols. The NTSB guards the integrity of its investigations closely, demanding that participants adhere to rules about what information they can release and their expected cooperation. These so-called parties to investigations must sign legal agreements laying out their responsibilities.

    “It is unfortunate that Tesla, by its actions, did not abide by the party agreement,” Sumwalt said.

    Where’s our common sense Elon Musk control?

    1. Scruffy Nerfherder

      The NTSB is very pissy when it comes to investigations. They will not hesitate to sanction someone who doesn’t abide by their rules.

    2. Tundra

      Where’s our common sense Elon Musk control?

      It’s called the market. It sometimes takes awhile, but it eventually shows up.

      1. Bobarian LMD

        For very small definitions of common sense.

        And what does “stripped Tesla Inc. of its role in an investigation” actually do to TESLA?

      2. Rasilio

        To be sure the market is coming for Tesla. I wouldn’t bet against SpaceX however

  35. I. B. McGinty

    Caption entry:

    Get off my lawn!

    1. “I said-… oh, wait, that’s the secret service.”

  36. Just Say’n

    “One party is clearly dedicated to protecting your rights to have sex with animals and the other wants to strip you of these freedoms. Vote accordingly this November.”

    Wasn’t this a commentators whole thing at TOS….

    1. SugarFree

      SIV, the Chicken Fucker Supreme.

      1. tarran

        His handle was a fucking lie. It should have been TIV (closed borders *and* cock fighting).

        1. SugarFree

          He also had his panties in a twist about abortion and gay marriage.

          1. Just Say’n

            I once had a football player in college deliver a speech on why cock fighting should be legal in a communication’s class. His closing line was classic: “And, also, roosters have no souls”. He was a good guy otherwise

          2. Brett L

            So basically, he grew up on a farm with rooster?

          3. Just Say’n

            Basically. I give him credit for having the balls to make the speech. He also had a big chew in his mouth while he gave the speech, so he fit the stereotype well

          4. ruodberht

            “Grab its motherfucking leg.”

            That too.

      2. Just Say’n

        Put the history up again. I think Jesse linked to the first comments under a different name and then when he switched

        1. jesse.in.mb

          SF asked me to track my earlier comment down, but I wasn’t at a computer so here’s the thread from the other day

          Gather around sweet children to hear the lore of the land we once came from. Many ages ago, when neither Glibertarians nor SP were yet a glimmers in their fathers’ eyes there was a commenter at TOS who went by Single Issue Voter.

          Single Issue Voter|1.27.07 @ 4:51PM|#

          And who the Fuck (besides you) says I’m pretending to be “neutral” whatever that means?

          I’m a libertarian-anarchist.

          (My single issue for the 2008 POTUS race is legal cockfighting)

          I am arguing that there is NO common ground between the Democrat Party(and modern left-liberalism) and libertarians
          as Democrats do not believe in private property or individual liberty. I also add there are NO
          “libertarian-leaning” elected Democrats at the National level.

          Over the years, this voter with strong feelings about cockfighting or a desire to troll on the issue shortened his name and was forever mistaken for being a simian immune issue.

          SIV|6.4.12 @ 6:03PM|#

          I’m all over the place yonemoto. You just have to read the comments. Speaking of the “single issue” how is Gary Johnson on cockfighting/”animal cruelty” issues?

          And now you’re wise in the lore of the Glibs.

          And the full comment quoted for our lazier folks.

          1. juris imprudent

            The Hit’n’Run was something then. You should have seen the Hit’n’Run in those days.

      3. Tonio

        What do those acronyms stand for?

        1. Caput Lupinum

          Single Issue Voter was SIV’s original handle in the before times. He shortened it to his current acronym eventually. His single issue was the legalization of cock fighting. I assume by TIV, Tarran means Two Issue Voter.

          See Jesse for more details.

          1. Chafed

            It should have been HIV. That guy was a virus I did not want to be around.

          2. Tonio

            Belated golf clap.

          3. Playa Manhattan

            I believe Heroic Mulatto’s nickname for him was “Monkey AIDS”.

          4. commodious spittoon

            As opposed to what?

          5. Heroic Mulatto

            You are correct.

          6. Heroic Mulatto

            As opposed to what?

            The Brilliant Dr. Eye?

          7. Tonio

            Thanks. That explains so much. I’m pretty sure I mixed it up with him on animal cruelty at least once, and probably also state recognition of same sex marriage since the state obstinately remains in the marriage business.

      4. Bobarian LMD

        Not anything so crass as ‘fucker’.

        It was sweet, sweet love.

  37. Juvenile Bluster

    [Europa League]

    C’mon, CSKA. If nothing else, to see Troopz ranting about Wenger while fleeting Russian hooligans.

    I just realized I’m probably the only one here who gets that, but oh well.

    1. Rufus the Monocled

      Yeh, I want Arsenal to lose after that guy dove against Milan. I forgot his name.

    2. Brett L

      Fuckin’ Wenger. Nobody has squandered more talent and won less. Give him his gold watch and his pension.

    3. Rufus the Monocled

      Oh well. So much for that.

      1. Brett L

        Handball in the box? Is that what happened?

        1. Rufus the Monocled

          Which game are you referring to?

          1. Brett L

            Arsenal. It was 2-0 CKSA, then I saw something about a handball, then it was 2-1. I guess Arsenal got a garbage time goal, too.

          2. Rufus the Monocled

            I didn’t see it.

            VAR. Now. The sport needs it bad.

  38. Just Say’n

    Caption Contest:

    “So many losers out there. SAD”

    1. Tonio

      Nice.

    1. Scruffy Nerfherder

      ooooo… blocked as adult/sexually explicit

      1. straffinrun

        Really? LOL.

    2. Mad Scientist

      This is not my beautiful house!

      1. This actually is my beautiful wife!

      2. Bobarian LMD

        That is a good caption.

  39. Rasilio

    He told fellow lawmakers, “God forbid you vote against this bill, good luck explaining it.”

    That is the problem with laws like this. The merits of or actual need for the law are irrelivant it is nearly impossible for a legislator to actually rationally consider the law because he would forever after be known as the guy who voted to keep dogfucking legal

    I’m sorry but I don’t see an urgent need for such a law. If fucking an animal is so self evidently harmful to the animal then it can be handled under existing animal cruelty statutes. If it is not then I don’t see why it actually requires a law against it.

    1. invisible finger

      It’s possible they voted against it because they didn’t want to legalize sodomy.

      1. Playa Manhattan

        That’s exactly why they did it; it’s just funnier to accuse them of being sheepfuckers.

      2. Tonio

        ^This. Even though it’s a moot point after Lawrence v Texas. But they always hope that will be overturned so they want the laws on the books.

        Plus, I believe they can still arrest for that under state law even though it’s unlikely that a prosecutor would bring charges.

  40. CPRM

    Next town over is having a kerfuffle over hate birds. The birds are shitting everywhere, so the city council wants to cull them. People a very concerned about protecting those innocent animals.

    1. Gordilocks

      People in Shelbyville are stoooooopid.

  41. Stinky Wizzleteats

    Caption:

    I’m not too crazy about the darker folks but I’ll be damned if they can’t clean a mean window.

  42. Gordilocks

    Caption : I really miss Stormy. She really knew how to wield a rolled up magazine. Mmmmmm Stormy.

  43. straffinrun

    “Me and my wife couldn’t make it through a single steak because of the amount of bones.”

    You know who else gagged on a bone?

    1. Gordilocks

      Monica Lewinsky?

    2. Stinky Wizzleteats

      Ernst Rohm?

      1. Tonio

        I suspect he was a top.

    3. juris imprudent

      The Donner Party?

  44. mom gets publicly lambasted for giving daughter peanut butter and jelly sandwich at Target.

    A mother on a New York parenting blog wrote Monday that while shopping at the retailer, she gave her four-year-old daughter a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, and “a woman stopped me to lecture me about peanut allergies.

    The child’s mother then asked other moms on UrbanBaby if it was unacceptable to eat peanut butter in public.

    The anti-peanut butter backlash was swift and brutal. Most responses attacked the mother for potentially endangering children with peanut allergies. Some criticized her for feeding her daughter in a shopping cart, which they considered disgusting.

    “That’s really inconsiderate,” one person wrote. “So many kids have life threatening allergies to peanut butter. Eating it in a shopping cart GUARANTEES it will be smeared on the handle, etc. It’s really awful you would do this. Sorry, but imagine if it were your child with the allergy.”

    Another chimed in:

    “That’s actually kind of lousy of you. you are aware that kids with peanut allergies exist in the world, so it’s kind of a [expletive] move to let your kid smear peanut butter all over the child seat of a public cart.”

    GTFO. Never let the busy bodies in public get the upper hand in public. Miss hysteria over peanut allergies is completely out of hand and it needs to die.

    1. Christ. Speech to text and lack of proofreading make Homer go something something. S/Miss/Mass

      1. Bobarian LMD

        The Miss Hysteria contest was always the worst part of the Miss America Pageant.

    2. Brett L

      I hope the mom’s response was: “Fuck off. I hope your weak ass kid dies.”

      1. Bobarian LMD

        This should be the twitter link in the response.

    3. Mad Scientist

      That makes me want to smear peanut butter on shopping carts.

      1. straffinrun

        You haven’t been doing that? Am I the only one with common sense in the place?

    4. Raston Bot

      nearly every parent of a child of the age that can sit in a grocery cart has wipes on them.

      WIPE THE FUCKING HANDLEBAR.

      1. mexican sharpshooter

        *raises hand*

        I don’t have wipes nor would I use them if I did, because I want my kids to have an immune system.

        1. Ownbestenemy

          This guy gets it. Toughen up and rub some dirt on it

      1. Cool link, bro.

        1. slumbrew

          Goddammit – this

    5. straffinrun

      The [expletive] was”fucking sweet”.

    6. Playa Manhattan

      It was her fault for asking.

      Do you know where I DON’T get parenting advice? Strangers on the internet.

      1. Scruffy Nerfherder

        Did you know that barbiturates help your kids go to sleep faster? I recommend using them on school nights.

        1. Bobarian LMD

          Pro-tip- Don’t give them the amphetamines until you get to the daycare.

    7. Scruffy Nerfherder

      I think her biggest mistake was participating in a forum called UrbanBaby.

      1. slumbrew

        ^^ THIS

      2. Heroic Mulatto

        WASSSUP? How ’bout you come over to the crib and we can chew some teething rusks?


        UrbanBaby

        1. slumbrew

          Excellent – I had a similar thought at ‘UrbanBaby’

        2. Pope Jimbo

          YO DAWG I HEARD YOU LIKE TITTY MILK

    8. Ownbestenemy

      The reactions are a fucking product of being able to spout out inane and completely batshit asshollory comments in near anonymity without fear of being called a raving mad lunatic.

      1% of people have a peanut allergy. The chances that someone with that allergy goes to THAT Target and gets THAT cart are so fucking small. And then only worries if some ankle bitter was eating a PB&J and not worries about the thousands and thousands of other people who handled the cart deserve to be raging assholes.

    9. TK

      I don’t see why we won’t let the peanut floodgates open and finally get the genes out of the gene pool. Who the hell wants some weak-ass kid that can’t even eat a peanut, anyway?

      Its a joke- obviously. I do have a friend that has a death-reaction to peanuts. Its kind of a good point that your kid might smear peanut butter on the public shopping cart — but its no reason to flip out. That seems like an overreaction. If she’s going to feed the kid while its in the cart, just be sure to wipe the seat/handle down after you leave. Seems like a courtesy thing – because some people can die. And that’d be really shitty… but good for the gene pool. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

    10. mexican sharpshooter

      People give me shit for it, but you know what? THIS SHIT DOESN’T HAPPEN AT WAL-MART

      1. Heroic Mulatto

        You have to be human to have human allergies.

        1. mexican sharpshooter

          Fair point.

        2. Bobarian LMD

          It would suck to be allergic to humans.

          1. Russian Kia Drives Yusef

            It does…………

    11. Moms are the worst.

    12. Waterfall Insurance

      I remember my school in the late 90s telling us that if we eat peanut butter for breakfast to do a through job brushing our teeth before school. We also had a peanut free lunch table and the school stopped even carrying peanut butter in the cafeteria all because of one kid.

      1. I never heard any batshit peanut allergy nonsense through all grades

  45. CPRM

    Caption: Look at that squirrel, he doesn’t have to wear pants. Why do I have to wear pants….mirror…

  46. Brett L

    Caption: Is that Mueller digging through my trash?

  47. The Late P Brooks

    Easy money?

    The idea that higher interest rates don’t matter because they will simply reallocate cash between borrowers and lenders is misleading. It assumes that the easy money of the past decade was spent productively and is generating the earnings required to service the borrowing. In fact, to a substantial degree, borrowings simply financed consumption and leveraged purchases of existing assets rather than new investment. At higher interest rates, many borrowers won’t be able to service the debt they’ve incurred. The Fed and others had better be prepared for a return to “normal” that’s anything but.

    Umm, listen, Shirley- about that “stimulus”…

    1. Brett L

      At higher interest rates, many borrowers won’t be able to service the debt they’ve incurred. The Fed and others had better be prepared for a return to “normal” that’s anything but.

      Or, you know, signalling a raise in rates and doing so in small interest increments might cause the vast majority of borrowers to re-evalute their exposure to risk and do something different.

      **edited because Brett L can’t type gud**

    2. Raston Bot

      shit Obama’s entire 8 years in office was ZIRP. goddamn that fucker was useless.

      1. Raston Bot

        ^fact check: 7 out of 8 years. ZIRP from 12/16/08 – 12/16/15.

    3. straffinrun

      Soooo, we can’t raise rates because the debt is too high and we wouldn’t be able to service more debt? Seems legit.

  48. Gordilocks

    Caption : Smithers, release the hounds.

  49. Gordilocks

    Caption : The shitter at Mar-A-Lago has never seen Hillary’s ass.

    1. Bobarian LMD

      SAD.

  50. Rasilio

    Someone asked how the 3 Californias proposal would impact the various Federal Balances of Power in the Greatest Post Ever and I broke it down some but likely after everyone had abandoned the thread so I’m repeating and expanding here

    Trying to eyeball the existing congressional districts and place them into the prospective new states works out to

    North California
    D – 15 R – 2 Push – 1

    California
    D – 17 R – 0 Push – 2

    South California
    D – 8 R – 8 Push – 0

    Counts based on the CVPI analysis. The one district I am most unsure about is the 4th Congressional District. It looks like based on the map at the website that it is in North California but probably realistically belongs in South California. Also currently all 3 push districts are occupied by Republicans.

    The House would be effectively unchanged unless one of the new states gerrymandered it’s districts a bit more. I could see both Nor Cal and Cal becoming true one party states with no possibility of a Republican ever holding office but the net impact on house seats would be essentially 0.

    In the Senate you would go from 2 secure blue seats to 4 secure blue seats, 1 secure red seat and likely 1 seat that is continually contested in So Cal so the net effect would be either + 2 seats for the Dems or nothing based on which party carried the San Deigo Senate race.

    In the Electoral College it would be a pretty big win for Republicans as it would carve ~16 seats out of California’s Blue wall and turn it into a new battleground state that likely initially at least would lean slightly red.

    Politically I could see each party in general supporting the maneuver as both get something from it. republicans get a much easier path to the Presidency, Democrats get a slight benefit in the Senate making Republican majorities there harder to come by. That said I can’t see California’s current ruling elite going for it because of their unsustainable debt. Cal and Nor Cal having had much higher costs of living are going to be on the hook for a far larger slice per capita of the impending public pension tsunami than So Cal would and there is no way they would let those taxpayers leave without paying for it.

    1. Bobarian LMD

      North California would effectively be like New York. A geographically large conservative area being dominated by a small, heavily populated progressive area.

  51. The Late P Brooks

    Do you know where I DON’T get parenting advice? Strangers on the internet.

    Well, YOU’LL never be “Mother of the Year”.

  52. Rufus the Monocled

    God, I have to give a talking to a couple of lippy millennials. Wish me luck.

    1. Brett L

      “Listen, its always a good time for fucking, its never a good time for kids. Wrap it up!”

    2. Pan Zagloba

      “Bitches leave!”

      All you ever need to be an effective manager.

      1. slumbrew
    3. Mad Scientist

      Be sure to tell them how people behaved in your day!

    4. CPRM

      Do it in the form of PSA rap.

      1. C. Anacreon

        Not as bad as the radio PSA, where the white-bread woman goes:

        Don’t do drugs
        Drugs are bad
        And you’ll make your mother sad.

    5. invisible finger

      It’s your fault for offering to babysit children over the age of 15.

    6. Mad Scientist

      “This is your disrespectful, smarmy face. This is your disrespectful, smarmy face when I use it as a hockey puck. Any questions, eh?”

    7. Rufus the Monocled

      I considered opening with ‘listen you little stupid illiterate, hyperbolic cunts’ but decided on a softer approach.

      I had the chat. You know how it is. They’re contrite, and promise it won’t happen again ‘it’s just that I had personal issues’ blah, blah.

      I quell that shit immediately. Funny how they straighten up after they get called on bull shit.

      I explained the chain of command and no more lip. O

      Anyway. We’ll see.

      1. invisible finger

        Did you have the chat in English AND French?

        1. Rufus the Monocled

          These two are Anglos. One from Alberta.

          1. invisible finger

            I thought you were in Quebec?

  53. Gilmore

    “”Banquet Salisbury steaks that may be contaminated by foreign material.””

    I demand 100% American Bones in all my frozen ready meals

    1. Pan Zagloba

      That also works as a caption contest entry!

  54. The Late P Brooks

    If she’s going to feed the kid while its in the cart, just be sure to wipe the seat/handle down after you leave. Seems like a courtesy thing – because some people can die only an asshole leaves her/his kid’s grimy sticky pawprints all over everything the next poor sap is going to touch instead of wiping them off.

    1. Rasilio

      You mean you don’t like playing the classic baby game Poop or Peanutbutter?

  55. Enough About Palin

    “I’m going to have a statue of me put out on the lawn because I’m a great President. And unlike many of my predecessors, I’ve never owned slaves.”

  56. The Late P Brooks

    Soooo, we can’t raise rates because the debt is too high and we wouldn’t be able to service more debt? Seems legit.

    Oh, we will, one of these days. Just not yet. The time is not yet right.

  57. straffinrun

    How a ‘Cashless’ America Could Become ‘Gunless’

    DiNapoli suggested that these companies look into implementing ways to block credit card purchases of firearms, ammunition, and gun accessories. The implied threat was clear: stop extending credit to gun- and ammo-buyers, or risk having New York State investment money taken away from your bank or credit company because the left wants to ban guns.

    1. Heroic Mulatto

      Because cryptocurrency isn’t a thing.

      1. straffinrun

        He’s got an idea on that: DiNapoli suggested that these companies should consider whether gun transactions should be classified with restricted high-risk purchases like pornography, illicit drugs, and crypto-currencies.

      2. invisible finger

        It’s a thing. It will just be an illegal thing.

      3. Somalian Road Corporation

        That was the first thing that came to my mind, and I think the reason why it isn’t mentioned in the article may have something tangentially to do with the 2018 @aol.com email address.

        Not that I think the piece was bad otherwise, it’s just that “think-tank futurist” and that conspicuous absence made my eye twitch.

    2. slumbrew

      Fuck “cashless” right in the ear. The second that happens some central economic planner is going to go straight for negative interest rates – “We’ll _make_ people spend”.

    3. Raston Bot

      The implied threat was clear: stop extending credit to gun- and ammo-buyers, or risk having New York State investment money taken away from your bank or credit company because the left wants to ban guns.

      i wish NYS would. i wish Illinois would too.

      it’s beyond time NYSE and CBOE were completely decentralized and i think that would be the proverbial straw/camel event.

    4. Suthenboy

      The revolution LARPers really do want a hot war.

    5. Rasilio

      Yes no one who wants to buy a gun would ever be able to figure out how to purchase a supply of silver or gold coins to buy the gun with.

      No what he guarantees is in a cashless society all guns become untracable

    6. But Enough About Me

      The moment they try to go cashless, an underground economy based on alternative physical scrip will simply come into existence; prolly backed up or augmented by various cryptos, precious metals etc. Not to mention the ever-popular barter for smaller items.

  58. Gilmore

    For those who haven’t seen it yet: the worst “Lets go to War In Syria” non-argument i’ve yet read.

    Im slogging through it and giving it a line-by-line rip. will probably take a day.

    what’s worth noting is that no one makes these arguments because its far easier to simply avoid even trying to articulate specific reasons, which is what the pro-war media mostly does.

    why bother? most people don’t pay attention, and most people can’t think straight when they do.

    but what bothers me is the fact that anyone has the gall to introduce their piece with “Here are some good reasons”, and then proceeds to list zero good reasons. Or that no one else has yet bothered to point out how vacuous the case being made is.

    more than half the liberalish people i follow on twitter spent yesterday mocking Tucker Carlson for his anti-syrian-war rant.

    1. straffinrun

      You don’t have to read far before you come across opinion stated as fact: The Trump administration established a precedent in April of 2017 with its strikes on Syrian targets following Damascus’s gruesome release of sarin nerve gas on civilians.

      1. straffinrun

        And later we get this gem: Reestablishing deterrence is in America’s vital national interest. At the moment, that would likely mean disabling anything in the Assad regime’s possession that can fly

        That person is insane.

        1. Gilmore

          “Reestablishing deterrence””

          The entire concept of “deterrence” is to deter attacks against *yourself*

          Not “deter anyone, anywhere, from doing anything to some 3rd party”… because “Well what if America gets involved?”

          Its this batshit reinvention of what words means, and this sweeping assumption of necessarily authority over the entire planet’s behavior.

    2. Suthenboy

      No one has explained to me why we are at war in…how many places now? What will we win? What does winning look like? The only thing approaching an argument that I have gotten is the run-up to WWII. We let our enemies get too powerful and then it was very expensive to defeat them. Give me a break. The ME is going to unite into some kind of powerful enemy? The only thing they like more than killing us is killing each other.

      GTFO of the ME. I dont care if they all eat each other, really.

      1. invisible finger

        We’re staying in the ME until we’re more bankrupt than the Soviets.

      2. Psycho Effer

        I had this conversation with a couple of libertarian-leaning Trump voters at the office yesterday, about how we are about to start WWIII. They were like, “Are we not supposed to care about Assad gassing his own people?” My response, of course, was “No. Fuck them. Tell the Americans to get out of there and close the door behind them. Not our problem.” They thought about it and eventually agreed.

    3. mikey

      I think it comes down to – “We must do this because we have to do this.”
      That and bombing = stabilization.

  59. KibbledKristen

    MBC is reporting Mattis cancelled travel plans. Buckle up, boys! We’re going to (another) war!

    1. KibbledKristen

      NBC. Jeezus.

      1. invisible finger

        Wake me up when we beat Hitler’s record.

        1. F. Stupidity Jr.

          Wake me up when we beat Hitler’s record.

          SPLC Report: Users on hate site “Glibertarians.com” call for genocides in greater numbers than the Nazis!

          1. invisible finger

            I shoulda said “Mao’s record”

          2. invisible finger

            Actually, I shoulda said “Marx’s record”

          3. The Last American Hero

            Hey now, Freedonia only entered one war, and if you ask me, Sylvania was asking for it.

      2. It could have been MBC.

    2. straffinrun

      What is the best case scenario if they up military action in Syria? Even by their own rosey predictions, it sounds terrible.

      1. KibbledKristen

        Deposing Assad is a move with little chance of positive outcomes. Can we add “don’t depose strongman dictators” to the list of unwise military strategies, along with “don’t invade Russia in winter”?

        1. slumbrew

          and “Never go in against a Sicilian when death is on the line!”

          1. Juvenile Bluster

            HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

            HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

            HA…..

          2. KibbledKristen

            “Never get in a land war in Asia!” (which is also from Princess Bride, but true)

          3. Pan Zagloba

            Pfft, if Brits East India Company listened to it, there’d have never been a Raj!

        2. Suthenboy

          Deposing Gahdaffi with no plan or power structure to replace him was the worst FP action in history. I cant help but believe Obumbles did that on purpose. He spent 8 years shitting on everything American and that was his biggest turd.
          I notice the MSM does not report on what is going on in Libya at all. Dead silence from the shitweasels.

          1. BakedPenguin

            I notice the MSM does not report on what is going on in Libya at all. Dead silence from the shitweasels.

            Well, they can’t talk about slave auctions. Everyone knows only white people ever did that…

            ~~~Your comment done got Faeried~~~

          2. BakedPenguin

            Thx, edit fairy.

          3. BakedPenguin

            Fuck you, blockquote.

        3. invisible finger

          Why would Deep State want to have a strategy that won’t require a budget increase?

        4. Scruffy Nerfherder

          There are no positive outcomes for this scenario, period.

          The best thing is to stay the fuck out of it.

      2. Gilmore

        “best case scenario”

        Iran and Russia slink away quietly, and the Kurds and Turks sign peace agreement and everyone hugs and declares the USA the best nation on earth.

        oh, and i win the lottery.

      3. Rasilio

        Best case scenario….

        We limit it to a missile strike to start, Russia’s vaunted S400’s fail and they don’t escalate because they don’t want any prospective clients to know about the failure so they state publicly that they chose not to interfere in the interests of avoiding a nuclear tragedy

    3. KibbledKristen

      I’m gonna take a look at marinetraffic.com to see if there’s any indication off commercial traffic in the area being affected.

      Also, I believe the UK has issued warnings to airlines that flying to and from the Eastern Med is going to be dangerous in the near future.

      1. KibbledKristen

        So there are no commercial/private ships anywhere between Latakia and Tartus. A couple of Turkish ships bound for Iskenderun, but they’re swinging pretty far to the west of the Syrian coast.

      2. KibbledKristen

        No cancellations in and out of Adana that I can see. Damascus airport probably isn’t a good gauge, as they probably have very few flights these days regardless. There is a flight inbound there from Baghdad right now. I hope the callsign is “Shithole Airlines” (though, Damascus used to be a really beautiful city. Very glad I got to experience it.)

        1. Russian Kia Drives Yusef

          A lot of Air refueling and transport taking off from March ARB today, a Lot

          1. KibbledKristen

            Interesting…I wonder what the activity level has been at Incirlik?

    4. Tulip

      What do you expect when the Secretary of defense is known as ‘Mad Dog’.

    1. Fab Five Freddy hardest hit.

      1. C. Anacreon

        Yeah, he told me everybody’s high
        DJ’s spinning are saving my mind

        1. C. Anacreon

          Wow, I posted saying “everybody’s high” and it said it was post # 420

          *Twilight Zone theme plays*

    2. Suthenboy

      Again?

    3. Rasilio

      What’s the matter with them, they can’t at least hold it off till Cinco De Mayo so we can all get one last shot at drunken mexican ass sex?

    4. Number.6

      That’s the day before poor old Count Dankula gets sentenced.

      Connection? You decide.

  60. Suthenboy

    I dont get the goose problem. Do I have to post a recipe for plum sauce?

  61. Caption contest:

    Don’t move. Their vision is based on movement.

  62. Gilmore

    What’s that saying about

    “‘Racial pride is in unearned accomplishments of others, and yadda yadda yadda”

    i recall hearing J Peterson and others mentioning it, and its a quote

    1. Gordilocks

      Doug Stanhope has a bit about that as well, vis a vis nationalism.

      1. Heroic Mulatto

        *sigh*

        It was a simpler time. A time before the world went bugfuck insane.

  63. Pope Jimbo

    Minnesoda millionaire really urinates off local proggies.

    ST. PAUL—Millionaire Rob Undersander sat at a Minnesota House witness stand saying he received food stamps for 19 months to prove a point: Not everyone who gets the aid needs it.

    Democratic legislators did not like his Wednesday, April 11, testimony, particularly Rep. John Considine, D-Mankato.

    “You knew this was wrong and you did it anyway,” Considine said while staring at Undersander. “I find it pretty despicable. …. I am just sorry there is no way we can prosecute you.”

    You know why the big tuff DFL-er can’t prosecute the guy? Because legally he didn’t do anything wrong. Since he wasn’t pulling in any income – and Minnesoda doesn’t count other assets when deciding who is eligible for food stamps – he could get that money.

    The DFL-ers are really mad that this guy has shown how many people are sucking at the govt teat who don’t need to.

    1. invisible finger

      “You knew this was wrong”

      It ain’t wrong if it’s legal.

      1. Raven Nation

        “Once the government has declared something legal, it’s no longer a sin.”

      2. See Double You

        Sounds like he did the right thing by exposing the ridiculousness of the law. As Tonio said below, these Dems are pissed he made them look like incompetent morons. “Draft a better law next time, fuckheads” would have been an epic yet accurate concluding remark from Undersander.

    2. TK

      That is awesome and fucked at the same time. Wow. Had a friend once that would brag about sharing all of her food stamps coworkers (we didn’t work together). She gets so mad when anybody points out how fucked up it was. I don’t hang out with her anymore.

    3. mexican sharpshooter

      I applaud this man.

    4. KibbledKristen

      I like this guy! The millionaire, not the political douches.

    5. Scruffy Nerfherder

      Nice

    6. invisible finger

      “You knew this was wrong and you did it anyway,”

      The very definition of progressivism.

    7. Stinky Wizzleteats

      I remember years ago watching Ol’ Dirty Bastard go pick up his food stamps with MTV in tow. It was quite the show.

      1. invisible finger

        That’s OK, food stamps are for Democrats.

      2. Tonio

        Perhaps the inspiration for James O’Keefe.

      3. Gilmore

        And he was drunk as fuck too. Drinking vodka out of a plastic cup

        It was, in my mind, the greatest moment in MTV history

          1. Stinky Wizzleteats

            Awesome, hard to believe that was 23 freaking years ago.

    8. Tonio

      “[Usanger] said that he donated the equivalent of the food stamps to charities, his church and the needy.”

      And that’s what really pisses them off, that he was truly, as he said, auditing the program.

    9. See Double You

      “You knew this was wrong and you did it anyway,” Considine said while staring at Undersander. “I find it pretty despicable. …. I am just sorry there is no way we can prosecute you.”

      Man, you can smell the impotence.

      1. Pope Jimbo

        I am sure that there is an audit or two in that man’s future.

        At the very least all the orphans who die of hunger next time they fail to spend another couple billion on SNAP will be dropped off on his front lawn.

      2. Tonio

        It’s both impotence and incompetence. I suspect that those DFL turds voted for a food stamp bill that didn’t means test and now they are covering their asses.

        They are shitting themselves that someone might do an audit of the entire program, which could be bad for them next election.

        1. Pope Jimbo

          The local GOP could run with that idea to a huge wave of electoral wins in the state. But that would take brains. So they will let themselves get bamboozled and drop the issue.

  64. straffinrun

    Only an asshole would defend the concept of “taint teams”.

  65. See Double You

    “Caption Contest, of course. Winner gets his home address posted on Woodser, the dating site for lonely Bigfeet.”

    Here’s mine: “The Hair, missing the Hat.”

  66. Pope Jimbo

    As you may have guessed, the Mayo Clinic pulls a lot of weight in Minnesoda. The recently got a huge chunk of money to expand their main clinic in Rochester. Things have not gone as well for some of their other hospitals though. They operated two hospitals in Albert Lea and in Austen. Mayo says that the two hospitals are only 23 miles apart and by offering identical services they lost $13M the last two years. They are going to consolidate the operations. Some will stay in Albert Lea but most services will go to Austen.

    Needless to say Albert Lea has freaked out. They have formed all sorts of political action committees to stop Mayo. Normally I’d be totally on the Mayo’s side of this, but because they are such big corporate welfare jerks, I find it funny that the legislature is fucking with them. No idea why Albert Lea folks think they deserve a hospital that is losing money.

    I bring all that up because there was a secret meeting in Albert Lea recently and the local reporter says that the city council is talking eminent domain. Which she humorously writes up as:

    Eminent domain allows governments to purchase private property for public use when the property owner does not want to sell.

    Uh huh. I’m sure that is what most people think it is, but in this case they are talking about seizing the hospital to give to another provider (who is private).

    1. KibbledKristen

      Well, Kelo took care of that, eh? Perfectly legal, guvna!

    2. See Double You

      And “purchase” is really the wrong way to convey the core meaning of eminent domain. It’s called a “taking” for a reason.

      1. invisible finger

        It’s just fixing a price and enforcing it. Like taxis and utilities. If you’re a socialist, supply and demand setting prices is evil.

        1. See Double You

          Besides the controversy over the meaning of “public use” which gets all the attention, the meaning of “just compensation” as interpreted by the courts rankles me. The courts interpret JP to mean fair market value, which is bullshit, since the ordinary meaning of FMV is the price a willing buyer will buy and a willing seller will sell. Obviously, in ED cases the seller is unwilling. The government should be made to pay more than FMV, although I don’t know by how much.

          1. slumbrew

            Agreed – if they’re gonna fuck you, you should at least get some sort of premium to sooth the burn. FMV +X%

      2. Number.6

        Interestingly, they don’t (or didn’t) mince words back in the UK, calling it “Compulsory Purchase”

    3. So they should move out all the assets in the middle of the night.

      1. Russian Kia Drives Yusef

        +1 Colts

        1. (And yes, Maryland was threatening to take the Colts via eminent domain.)

  67. Waterfall Insurance

    Caption attempt: “The president going through his daily search of the curtains for James Comey.”

    1. mexican sharpshooter

      Related: In new book, Comey says Trump ‘untethered to truth’

      The 6-foot-8 Comey describes Trump as shorter than he expected with a “too long” tie and “bright white half-moons” under his eyes that he suggests came from tanning goggles. He also says he made a conscious effort to check the president’s hand size, saying it was “smaller than mine, but did not seem unusually so.”

      This book sounds like a hard hitting tell all.

      1. slumbrew

        Good to know that our country is run by Mean Girls.

      2. Somalian Road Corporation

        Yeah, but will Hillary be reading excerpts from it at the next Grammys like she did with Fire and Fury? That’s how you know you really made it.

    2. Pope Jimbo

      *snort*

  68. KibbledKristen
    1. F. Stupidity Jr.

      Easter morning, 1988. Our first one at the Salem road house, a few miles outside Victoria, TX. “Country living”, you know. Anyhow, my mom wakes my dad that morning with “Honey…there’s a kangaroo in the yard!”

      This is what the kangaroo looked like.

      1. Dat ass….

      2. Russian Kia Drives Yusef

        That’s a Joey is all, mate!

    2. slumbrew

      Manhattan

      That’s a fine idea, don’t mind if I do (literally just made one).

    3. Playa Manhattan

      It’s very easy to mistake a trash panda for a tiger.

  69. Just Say’n

    Anyone in the Chicagoland area considering going to TOS happy hour in River North Monday evening?

    1. Juvenile Bluster

      And if you are, can you smack my brother upside the head while you’re in the neighborhood?

      Thx.

  70. Derpetologist

    neither here nor there

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RAGcDi0DRtU
    According to a Finnish comedian. the most complex word in English is ass. Consider:

    big ass
    dumb ass
    smart ass
    bad ass
    jack ass
    fat ass
    ass hole
    piece of ass
    laugh my ass off

  71. R C Dean

    I like this Mulvaney guy that Trump appointed to head the CFPB. Elizabeth Warren sent him a bunch of questions she wanted him to answer, and he told her he wasn’t going to, because the way she set the agency up to be unaccountable to Congress means he doesn’t have to answer those questions. She can ask him questions when he testifies, but until then she can pound sand, because that’s the way she wanted it.

    Mulvaney, a conservative who was an outspoken critic of the bureau during his time as a congressman, told Warren in a letter sent Wednesday that the structure of the agency, which she helped design, shields him from accountability.

    “I encourage you to consider the possibility that the frustration you are experiencing now, and that which I had a few years back, are both inevitable consequences of the fact that the Dodd-Frank… Act insulates the Bureau from virtually any accountability to the American people through their elected representatives,” Mulvaney wrote.

    1. R C Dean

      Clicked too soon.

      Warren, unsurprisingly, is unacquainted with the Iron Law: Me today, you tomorrow.

    2. slumbrew

      That’s excellent. It sound like he may have actual principles. Shocking.

    3. Grumbletarian

      Trump has managed some very good appointments — Gorsuch, Mulvaney, DeVos, Pruitt — and at the same time some equally heinous ones — Sessions, Bolton, Pompeo…

  72. Juvenile Bluster

    My political life is becoming recursive. I can’t stand Trump. I can’t stand the anti-Trump narrative. I can’t stand the anti-anti-Trump narrative. I can’t stand the anti-anti-anti Trump narrative.

    It might go a few more antis at this point.

    1. KibbledKristen

      Same

    2. R C Dean

      I can’t stand Trump.

      I like him less every day. Today’s brainfart was that he wants to mandate 15% ethanol content for fuel year-round.

      1. Juvenile Bluster

        Wawa sells ethanol-free gas here. It’s amazing how much better my car runs on that versus standard gas.

        Unfortunately, it’s 50 cents more a gallon, and the increased gas mileage doesn’t come close to covering the difference.

        1. Russian Kia Drives Yusef

          Wha? This place, I do not know of….

          1. Juvenile Bluster

            It’s in the mid-Atlantic and Florida. Gas Station/Convenience Store. Awesome place.

          2. Timeloose

            Do you get the hoagies with Amorrosa rolls away from Philly?

    3. Derpetologist

      My advice is to start drinking heavily.

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gGHX_jsuRy0

    4. straffinrun

      The economist’s joke comes to mind. “How’s your wife doing?” “Compared to what?”

    5. Russian Kia Drives Yusef

      Just walk way for a while, Politics rots the Mind you know

    6. BakedPenguin

      I can’t stand Trump. I can’t stand the anti-Trump narrative. I can’t stand the anti-anti-Trump narrative. I can’t stand the anti-anti-anti Trump narrative

      Second. He was amusing for a while, now he’s just tedious.

  73. Juvenile Bluster

    Trump weighs rejoining Trans-Pacific Partnership

    o… ok? It would be a good thing, but strange.

    This is another thing (along with war) that Congress needs to take back responsibility for.

    1. Raven Nation

      I don’t know the details, but I’m pretty sure the TPP currently in place is not exactly the same as the one Trump pulled out of.

      1. NO TPP, whatever it’s iteration.

    2. The Last American Hero

      It’s a ploy to get China, I mean CHI-NA, to sit down and negotiate.

  74. Russian Kia Drives Yusef

    “Congress needs to take back responsibility for”
    Or You’re a Funny one

  75. Juvenile Bluster

    The good senator from Slothville is right. This is the worst idea.

    https://twitter.com/senatorshoshana/status/984429010024390656

    1. Sir Digby Chicken Caesar

      All apologies to (our) Jesse:

      Jesse
      @decadent_creed
      16h16 hours ago
      More
      Replying to @senatorshoshana
      Private enterprise is the malicious, controlling Big Brother everyone thought the government would turn into.

      Give it a minute, “creed”–you’ll soon see what the government has turned into.

  76. Derpetologist

    random thought

    Why would the Russians kill someone with a method that is so easily traced back to them? Is the idea to leave a big enough hint?

    If they really wanted to kill someone without being implicated, a gun or a knife or an ice pick would be better.

    1. Russian Kia Drives Yusef

      They Want you to Know, and Squirm cause you Can’t prove it

    2. Number.6

      Of course they’re sending a message. Giyorgi Markov, Alexander Litvinenko. All the same.

      Kill one man, terrorize one thousand. Go to Camp Pendleton and read it on the wall, carved in stone.

    3. Just Say’n

      Ice pick has been overplayed

  77. Gilmore

    Chris Hayes:

    If Racists dislike war, maybe war isn’t so bad after all

    Chris Hayes
    @chrislhayes

    And the idea that the opposition to strikes against Assad is such a defining moral question it excuses explicitly joining forces with reactionaries and white nationalists, is, to my mind, misguided, to put it mildly.

    1. Derpetologist

      wiki sez

      ***
      On November 5, 2010, MSNBC announced that Hayes would be filling in for Keith Olbermann during Olbermann’s suspension. However, the network later backtracked after finding out that Hayes had also made political contributions—the issue over which Olbermann was being suspended.[16]

      Hayes is married to Kate Shaw, associate professor of law at Benjamin N. Cardozo School of Law;[36] his father-in-law is veteran Chicago reporter Andy Shaw.

      Hayes’ brother Luke worked on Barack Obama’s 2008 and 2012 presidential campaigns.[42]
      ***

      They’re all in bed with each other.

      1. Just Say’n

        I like Andy Shaw. Too bad his son-in-law is a turd

      2. Winston

        Hayes’ brother Luke worked on Barack Obama’s 2008 and 2012 presidential campaigns.

        I am in shock…

    2. Just Say’n

      “These white nationalists don’t want to go kill a bunch of Arabs overseas. Let’s kill a ton of Arabs just to stick it to those white nationalists”

      Yeah, that doesn’t make any sense.

      I like how he hedges, though, by saying that somehow Trump’s drone strikes are worse than Obama’s were. Under what metric?

      1. Stinky Wizzleteats

        Obama did it out of love.

        1. Derpetologist

          Obama got a Nobel Peace prize, whereas John Bolton was merely nominated for one:

          https://www.thedailybeast.com/nobel-nomination-nonsense

          fun fact: previous Nobel Peace prize nominees include Neville Chamberlain and Josef Stalin.

    3. juris imprudent

      Trump’s greatest gift is to turn his opponents into even bigger blithering idiots than he is. How does he do it?

      1. juris imprudent

        I mean, we are being fucking governed by someone with slightly less intellectual horsepower than Chauncey Gardner, and STILL, his critics can’t crawl out of their own drool?

  78. KibbledKristen

    You know it’s warm weather when you hear the “Dixie” car horn loud & clear outside your balcony.

    1. The Last American Hero

      Hope the sheriff doesn’t hear or those Duke boys could be in trouble.

      1. KibbledKristen

        Someday the mountain might get them, but the law never will.

  79. Derpetologist

    god damn it

    https://www.cnn.com/2018/04/12/asia/afghanistan-taliban-ghazni-attack-intl/index.html

    14 killed in Taliban attack in Afghanistan’s Ghazni province

    ***
    The head of security for Ghazni province, Ramazan Ali Mohsen, said five people were injured in addition to the 14 dead. Other than the district governor, Ali Dost Shams, all the casualties were security forces, Mohsen said.
    Taliban spokesman Zabiullah Mojahid, in a statement to media, said the militants had taken the key parts of the district including the district and police headquarters. He said Taliban fighters had killed about 20 Afghan security force members.
    ***

    I just finished reading The Future of Land Warfare by Micael Hanlon. He wrote that in counterinsurgency, you need about 1 soldier per 50 people. For Afghanistan, that works out to about 700k troops. The Afghan army and police are about 320k. Foreign troops are about 13k.

    1. Number.6

      What’s the ratio of FBI agents to US Citizens again?

      1. Derpetologist

        about 1 per 10k.

        We are far from a police state, fortunately.

      2. R C Dean

        Looks like there are well north of 1mm cops in the US. Eyeball number would probably be around 1.25mm, and that probably doesn’t include TSA, corrections officers and others that aren’t technically law enforcement officers but sure smell like ’em. Total SWAG here, but I would say there’s probably 2mm cops and copalikes.

        There’s about 320mm people in the US, so that works out to 1 to about every 160 – 200 Americans.

    2. Gilmore

      in counterinsurgency, you need about 1 soldier per 50 people

      this might be worth referencing

      the short of it being, there are no fixed force ratios for anything.

        1. Russian Kia Drives Yusef

          Jew Girls ! YEA!!!!!

  80. Festus

    Caption contest – https://youtu.be/5rOiW_xY-kc

  81. The Last American Hero

    Caption attempt: Damn, that is one fine piece of ass that Kushner has on his arm. Oh shit, I’m doing it again.

  82. Derpetologist

    I’ve been reading Nothing To Envy. It’s a collection of stories from survivors of North Korea. There was a time in the 90s during the same when markets were semi-legal. Later, the govt cracked down on them because they didn’t want people to become to independent from the govt.

    MacArthur wanted to drop 50 atomic bombs on China and North Korea during the Korean war. I wish he got his way. Much misery would have been averted.

  83. Winston

    Rothbard on the Vietcong

    https://mises.org/library/never-dull-moment/html/c/498

    First, we should realize that the NLF are not simply communists, but a broad national coalition of numerous groups, including Buddhists, Catholic abbés, and middle-class parties; and in this coalition the communists play a leading role. Secondly, as a witness to this broad coalition, there is not a word in this lengthy political program about the establishment of a socialist society. On the contrary, the NLF platform is no more socialistic than those of the Democratic or Republican parties in the United States — and maybe a good deal less. Not only that: the major thrust of the program is the guarantee of the private property of business and especially of the peasantry, who are the vast bulk of the Vietnamese population. In addition, the program proclaims and guarantees the freedom of religion, of national minorities to have their own language and autonomy, and of speech, press, assembly, association, demonstrations, and forming of political parties, as well as “inviolability of the human person,” freedom of residence and movement, and the secrecy of the mails.

    On property rights, the NLF program promises “to protect the right to ownership of the means of production and other property of the citizens.” It adds that “the state will encourage the capitalists in industry and trade to help develop industry, small industries and handicrafts,” and will “give due consideration to the interests of small traders and small manufacturers.” Above all, the program repeatedly guarantees the right of peasants to their land, and promises to turn over any lands confiscated by the state (e.g., the “lands of the U.S. imperialists”) to the peasantry.

    There are other important aspects of the NLF program which have won due attention from the press, such as guarantees of equal treatment to defecting troops and a pledge of a foreign policy of peace and neutrality. But in the long run, the guarantees to private capitalist and especially to peasant property are the most important, for these guarantees, set against the anti-peasant policies of the Saigon puppet regime, go a long way to account for the puzzling fact that the undeveloped countries of the world tend to support communists rather than the United States. It is because the communists proclaim their support for national independence and for the private property of the peasantry, while the U.S. invariably backs colonial and feudal landlord regimes that are hated throughout these countries.

    1. Derpetologist

      14 yr old me responds thusly:

      https://youtu.be/CMX2lPum_pg?t=1m20s

      1. Winston

        Not allowed in my country…

      2. Number.6

        29 year old me responds thusly:

        https://youtu.be/r26krlXFmOI?t=66

        1. Scruffy Nerfherder

          I had forgotten they existed. Fortunately.

          Thanks for nothing 6.

    2. Suthenboy

      So, another self professed fan of liberty championing communism. Shocking. I am still waiting for the crowd over at TOS to come completely out of the closet.

    1. Russian Kia Drives Yusef

      I have looked for this for YEARS THANK YOU!
      Whoo, c’mon party people

      1. BakedPenguin

        We don’t need no water, let the motherf**ker burn
        Burn motherf**ker… burn.

        A bit nihilistic, but still, a good song.

  84. commodious spittoon

    Speaking of birds. I adore that little girl. Fuck pigeons. And fuck youtube commenters.

  85. Leroy

    The measure does also specify that previously illegal forms of “sodomy” are no longer against the law.

    “Anal sexual intercourse between two human beings shall not be deemed as a crime,” part of the bill states.

    What a load of bullshit. That is not at all what the bill states. From the bill :

    8 §89. Crime against nature
    9 A. Crime against nature is either of the following:
    10 (1) The unnatural carnal copulation by a human being with another of the
    11 same sex or opposite sex or with an animal, except that anal sexual intercourse
    12 between two human beings shall not be deemed as a crime against nature when done
    13 under any of the circumstances described in R.S. 14:41, 42, 42.1 or 43. Emission is
    14 not necessary; and, when committed by a human being with another, the use of the
    15 genital organ of one of the offenders of whatever sex is sufficient to constitute the
    16 crime.

    The new bill strikes out “with an animal” from line 11, and then adds an entirely new sub-section defining bestiality as a seperate crime. Basically, the new bill seperates out bestiality from ‘crime against nature,’ but leaves ‘crime against nature’ on the books.

    From what I can gather (after sifting through all the dishonest media reports of the most recent vote) republicans that voted against this bill were in favor of Senator Dan Claitor’s bill which was proposed on Monday. His bill would have removed the sodomy law from the book, but was voted down by…. the democrats. I wonder if this was all just a big ploy to score political points? http://www.nola.com/crime/index.ssf/2018/04/bestiality_bill_passes_senate.html

    The blatant dishonesty of the media is astounding.

    SIDE NOTE: I apologize if I screwed up all of the HTML. I have no idea what I’m doing and had to google the code.

    1. Leroy

      Damnit, I retyped part of this, and left out a key point. R.S. 14:41, 42, 42.1 and 43 are the rape statutes. So anal intercourse doesn’t qualify as a crime against nature ONLY IF it qualifies as a rape instead.

      Anal sex is still illegal in Louisiana.

      1. Suthenboy

        It must not happen then.

        *No one here pays any attention to that. A couple of years ago a dude got pinched for fucking a dog, but other than that people here dont care much.

  86. Winston

    https://hotair.com/archives/2018/04/12/former-trump-doorman-told-not-criticize-former-housekeeper-fathered-child/

    So apparently if the National Enquirer is spiking stories because they embarrass Trump that is a campaign finance violation. Do they really expect us to believe that the National Enquirer is the only entity to be doing this?

    1. Scruffy Nerfherder

      The Wapo and the NYT have never spiked a story about a prominent politician, ever.

      1. Winston

        Also I’m sure Trump is the first person to pay someone with an embarrassing story.

        1. Chafed

          Paying and getting caught paying are not the same thing.

          1. Winston

            That’s because the Feds and MSM usually don’t care…

      2. Winston

        This really is feeling like banana republic stuff. Trump is guilty of stuff the political class has been doing for centuries and will keep doing.

    2. Leroy

      The argument is a bit nuanced, but I still don’t think its a good one.

      Basically (if I understand it correctly) money paid in order to benefit a campaign, when coordinated with that campaign, has to be disclosed under campaign finance laws. There are exceptions carved out for the media, but those exceptions specify costs incurred in ‘covering or carrying’ a story, or in ‘distribution’ of a news story. The argument being made is that by sitting on the story and not covering it, National Enquirer doesn’t qualify for the exception. I think they’ll have to get a judge to agree, and also prove that the payment was coordinated with the Trump campaign.

      Am I understanding this correctly? I know we have glib lawyers in here.

  87. KibbledKristen

    Should I jinx it?

    Live po-po chase in LA

    https://www.facebook.com/CBSLA/videos/10156331236470859

    1. Russian Kia Drives Yusef

      go skiing FFS sake, car chases? you need Friends, come and play with us Westies….

  88. Just Say’n

    What a world we live in where Tucker Carlson and Tomi Lahren are the voice of reason and restraint

    1. Chafed

      You take it back. Take it back right now.

      1. Gustave Lytton

        WTF, can’t the rapture come before Tax Day? Gotta render unto Caesar first.

          1. Gustave Lytton

            Was worried it would be this.

          2. CPRM

            This is the only thing that comes to mind when I think of Blondie. (relevant lyrics: All alone on the overpass
            Wired and phoned to a heart of glass
            Now I’m falling in love too fast
            With you or the songs you chose)

          3. Some idiot already referenced it above.

  89. Russian Kia Drives Yusef

    Brent Barrie and Honest Abe, music
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Iqkg9uHNgRs
    Local brewery, nice Porter, Beer
    https://photos.app.goo.gl/lAgELwob5L2qAyyt2

  90. Winston

    http://dailycaller.com/2018/04/12/mueller-trump-obstruction/

    NBC News reported Thursday, “Three sources familiar with the investigation said the findings Mueller has collected on Trump’s attempts to obstruct justice include: His intent to fire former FBI Director James Comey; his role in the crafting of a misleading public statement on the nature of a June 2016 Trump Tower meeting between his son and Russians; Trump’s dangling of pardons before grand jury witnesses who might testify against him; and pressuring Attorney General Jeff Sessions not to recuse himself from the Russia investigation.”

    1. Gustave Lytton

      Obstruct justice or “obstruct” a kangaroo investigation?

  91. Juvenile Bluster

    Reaction to tonight’s hockey games, by order of start time: Yay, Boo, Yay, Yay (if it holds up), Yay (if it holds up)

    Better than yesterday.

    Fuck the Pens

    1. CPRM

      Reaction to tonight’s hockey games

      Hockey would be better if if it were played on a grass field, probably about 100 yards long, and the puck would be replaced with ovoid ball which has restrictions on who can move it at certain points on the field.

      1. Juvenile Bluster

        Hockey > Real Football > American Football > Basketball > Baseball

        1. CPRM

          Soccer is out; because it’s not a sport if you can’t hit someone. Hockey is out because sports that are only constant action have low standards for strategy. Basketball and and Baseball are out on point 1.

        2. Winston

          Real Football? Who made Ebenezer Cobb Morley the owner of the Word?

    1. CPRM

      I don’t trust heads that don’t talk.

      1. Gustave Lytton

        SWEEP THE LEG!

        I think I like Daniel-san less and less with each passing year.

        1. Gustave Lytton

          Weird. That was supposed to be a standalone comment not a reply.

        2. CPRM

          How can the white boy who was taught asian arts by a white boy ever overcome the white boy who was taught asian arts by an asian in the age of cultural appropriation? Maybe they are both the villains?

        3. Chafed

          Am I supposed to root for Cobra Kai? Because that trailer makes them sympathetic.

        4. MikeS

          Now that is a twist. I like it. Would watch. Much curious.

        5. Raston Bot

          That will work because Johnny was always the more interesting, complex character.. portrayed by a better actor.

      2. Does ZARDOZ talk?

    2. Chafed

      Love the song even though I don’t understand it.

      1. MikeS

        You aren’t smart enough to understand the lyrics. Just ask David Byrne, he’ll tell you so.

    3. Festus

      A neat version of my favorite Talking Heads song – https://youtu.be/cUEiMQfSrZw

      1. slumbrew

        That’s great, thanks for that link.

    1. Raston Bot

      Delta looks insignificant. Still fascinating the numbers are so close.

      1. Festus

        “Ya see shit. Shit that you can’t ever unsee.” It’s actually true. I’m no ball gobbler when it it comes to this but some of those people see some pretty fucked up shit. What about the poor tow guys? Nobody ever gives a shit about them even though they are on the scene just as quickly as the heroes.