Thursday Morning Links

The Women’s final for the Aussie Open is set, with the top two seeds, Wozniaki and Halep, making it through to face each other.  On the Men’s side, Federer will play Chung sometime soon and will take on Marin Cilic, who made it through earlier today…last night…well whenever they played. I can’t tell what time or day anything is being played there, what with ESPN posting scores for Thursday on Wednesday and Wednesday on Thursday and…oh God, I think I’ve gone cross-eyed. (No crazy-eyes jokes from any of the Glibs that have met me, by the way. I don’t need that shit.)

The two top ten college basketball teams from Ohio, Cincy and Xaxier, both won last night easily.  The Buckeyes didn’t play although they took care of business the other night and I didn’t get a chance to recap. Other Top 25 teams in action: Auburn won, Florida lost, Nevada lost in double OT and Rhode Island took care of business.

Just two games on the ice last night.  TWO!  Can’t they at least schedule a couple more back to back games before they give these guys four days off for the all-star game (featuring Kid Rock!)?  Anyway, the Blackhawks slide continues as they fall to the Maple Leafs. Meanwhile, the Kings doused the Flames, both of those games going to OT.

I’m sure there’s others shit happening in the sports world. I won’t bother covering the JV tournament in English soccer, sorry. And if there’s something else y’all want me to touch on besides the NBA, let me know.

Get it? Got it? GOOD! Now let’s move into…the links!

Idiot

Erykah Badu might want to consult a physician and have those meds changed. Or maybe not. After all, I hadn’t heard her name mentioned in years. And all publicity is good publicity. Or something like that.

David Cop-a-feel has been accused of sexually assaulting the oldest looking 17-year old in the world. Her chiropractor has “verified” her story. The “doctor” said the pain from it has caused ripple effects almost 30 years later and that her “patient” had a panic attack while discussing it recently. And if I know anything about the medical profession, its that when patients finally decide top confide in the doctor chiropractor they’ve put their faith in, the real truth comes out…then they get adjusted and everything turns out fine. If the doctor is worried about her panic attacks or anxiety, maybe she could wrote her a prescr…oh that’s right. She’s not really a doctor.

Butthhurt dumbasses are butthurt. Get over yourselves, freaks.  That is all.

The next step in the creation of a libertarian utopia has taken place. Sorry gang, but this is the only way we can keep pace with the looters that are otherwise gonna breed and bleed us dry.

Idiots

To say that GOP lawmakers are getting tired of the FBI and DOJ stonewalling would be a gross understatement. Elsewhere, polls are saying that a majority of Americans would like a second special prosecutor to look into the FBI’s shenanigans and believe there has been collusion…by federal agents in the Clinton and Russia investigations.  Go long on popcorn, people. This is getting interesting.

Apparently, people VOLUNTARILY working at a party in skimpy clothing and being encouraged to be as friendly as they want to be with the guests is a bad thing. I, for one, can’t think of anything more empowering than to offer, for a substantial sum of money, work to women and not even consider offering the same employment opportunities to men…and then telling those women that they’re free to engage in whatever level of fraternization they personally find acceptable and then to forge whatever relationships from the employment they deem appropriate.  Aw, who am I kidding? Its more empowering to shut the whole operation down, end the donation of millions of dollars it generates and shame everyone involved that has a dick between their legs.

Bunch of fucking Victorian prudish left-wing assholes.

Idiot

Its good to be the king. But not quite as good in an age where almost everything you do is caught oil camera.

Classic move used to smuggle liquor into sporting events employed to steal Hennessy. I prefer using a baby backpack, but I can accept their move as legitimate. Although I would never use it to steal, only to get booze into a sporting event that should be selling beer at the concession stands because its at the fucking Staples Center. (EDG repping LBC will confirm this story if needed.)

That’s it. Shit, I had a lot of links today. Sorry for stealing anyone’s thunder.

Today’s music is dedicated to the people in the last link. (I apologize in advance to anyone offended by me posting that morose fucker.)

Have a great day, friends.  A great day!

Comments

557 responses to “Thursday Morning Links”

  1. Apparently, people VOLUNTARILY working at a party in skimpy clothing and being encouraged to be as friendly as they want to be with the guests is a bad thing.

    When I’ve been at the strip club, I feel like I’m the one being exploited – cash magically disappears to da ladies all because of my male glaze weakness.

    1. Also these are some early links. Someone is a morning person!

    2. Dakotain

      My part time job is at a strip club. It is truly amazing what some dancers make. I recently seen a dancer get about $50k over a 2 week time from one customer. And this is a small ND club, not Crazy Horse in Vegas.

      1. Certified Public Asshat

        We might need more stories…

        1. Dakotain

          I have thought about doing a submission “Economics of a Strip Club” or something like that. It’s amazing how much money people will spend on to get a pretty girl to sit on your lap.

          1. compgrokker

            Do it.

          2. {|}===[|}:;:;:;:;:;:;:>

            How much starting capital is required for a strip club?

          3. Dakotain

            Interesting question. The place I work at is fairly small. So a lot of the capital expenses, like a liquor license, would be the same as any bar.
            The Northern is the only strip club in ND right now. Our closes competition is in St Cloud MN which is almost 2oo miles away.

            Biggest problem I see would be finding dancers. That would depend a lot on the location where you build. Most of the dancers we have are travelers. We get a bunch of Russian and Eastern European. There are around 100 dancers who rotate through the club with around 20 working at any given time.

          4. {|}===[|}:;:;:;:;:;:;:>

            I’m in Phoenix so we’d get quite a few through ASU.

          5. R C Dean

            Way back in the day I had a “talent agency” that managed strippers as a client.

            We had to keep their files in a locked cabinet or some of the files (which had pix of the talent agency’s clients) would disappear.

      2. Pics or it didn’t happen.

        1. Chafed

          What the bear said.

    3. I found those places stopped being fun when I realized I had daughters the same age as the strippers.

      1. Count Potato

        Pics or it didn’t happen.

        1. Well played.

    4. Juan-Baptiste Emmanuel Seguin

      Male glaze does not sound appetizing.

    5. male glaze weakness.

      Ewww.

  2. Tundra

    Good morning Sloop!

    Morrissey sucks, but it’s a nice tie-in with the lynx. Well played!

    1. It was a bold strategy playing Morrissey. But the tie in was too easy to not exploit. Also, Johnny Marr still rocked, even if he was stuck with Morrissey.

    2. Just a thought not a sermon

      Oh man, I had a roommate who was really into Morrissey. Bad year. Not the guy’s worst song by far, though. Actually, I don’t really object to most of his songs singly, it’s just they were all so one-note in tone. Come on, mix it up a little.

      Anyway, better than the semester I had to room with the Jimmy Buffett obsessive. Morrissey puts you in the mood to slit your wrists, Jimmy Buffett drives you to it.

      1. That should have been “a thought not a sermon” one day.

      2. Evan from Evansville

        Bad year, eh?

        “It’s the same old story. Boy finds girl, boy loses girl, girl finds boy, boy forgets girl, boy remembers girl, girls dies in a tragic blimp accident over the Orange Bowl on New Year’s Day.”

        “Goodyear?”

        “No, the worst.”

      3. Chafed

        I’m stealing your last sentence.

    3. Hey I like the Smiths and Morrissey’s early albums.

      1. SugarFree

        Loved The Smiths, couldn’t really follow Mo into his solo career. A few songs here and there, but without Marr the spark was gone.

    4. ElspethFlashman

      I figured out, by excessive listening to Morrissey, that his songs almost always follow the same rhyme scheme. This is especially evident in Bona Drag, just fyi.

  3. Just a thought not a sermon

    97) My wife was working on the crossword the other day and asked me for a five-letter synonym for spunk. Moxie? I suggested. No, the answer was pluck. We laughed at how old-fashioned these words sounded. Moxie, pluck, these are words from our grandparents’ generation.

    But why? These are great words for determination, people with a spirit to get things done. Why are these words out of date? And why did our grandparents need so many of them? Am I reading too much into this, or does this show a real change in our national character, that at one time we were overflowing with words like this, but now people just laugh at them?

    1. You’re reading too much into this. We have more words for more things today than ever before in the history of the English language.

      1. Just a thought not a sermon

        Yeah, for every variety of gender confusion.

        1. Yeah. We used to have thirty words for fortitude and two for genders. Now we have thirty genders and only use two words for fortitude.

    2. Slammer

      5 letter word for spunk is semen

      1. straffinrun

        I was gonna go with that, but I wasn’t sure if was a NYT crossword.

        1. Bobarian LMD

          I don’t see any spunk on that dress, but a brother would be willing to help her out.

    3. straffinrun

      a five-letter synonym for spunk

      Cream?

      1. AlexinCT

        Mangoo is 6 letters.

        1. R C Dean

          So is “smegma”.

      2. {|}===[|}:;:;:;:;:;:;:>

        Skeet.

    4. Bob Boberson

      “It’s a beautiful thing, the destruction of words. You wouldn’t have seen the Dictionary 10th edition, would you Smith? It’s that thick.”

      [illustrates thickness with fingers]

      “The 11th Edition will be that”

      [illustrates thickness with fingers]

    5. Rufus the Monocled

      I use nincompoop all the time.

    6. Suthenboy

      “My wife was working on the crossword the other day and asked me for a five-letter synonym for spunk.”

      Semen.

      Dummy, she was trying to give you a hint.

      1. Suthenboy

        I am always too slow

        1. Bobarian LMD

          A bit of a late comer?

          1. AlexinCT

            Get accused of that a lot..

            Better than the alternative though//

      2. Just a thought not a sermon

        I’m often slow on the uptake.

        True story: When I was a senior in high school, this one cute girl in my Spanish class, Shelley, was always giving me backrubs.

        Me at the time: Shelley is so nice.

        Me years later: You fuckin’ idiot!

        1. yeah I’ve got some stories like that… in biology class watching some video. Lights off. The girl in the desk next to mine kicks her shoe off, begins to rub my leg with her bare foot, slips it under the cuff of my jeans, and then begins to pull the sock down.

          Nervous Me: …

          1. trshmnstr

            Girl I had a crush on came over to my house to study. She laid in my bed and spent the whole time talking about breaking up with her boyfriend and being single.

            Me: *oblivious* What part of the class are you having a hard time with?

        2. robc

          Studying calculus with the hottest girl in my freshman class (it was GT, sample size was small, so this is entirely possible). She puts her hand on my knee.

          Me (1987): [oblivious]

          Me (2018): WTF is wrong with you Dude, make your damn move! Any move! That’s the frickin signal, you moron!

          1. Rufus the Monocled

            /gently places palm under her breast. Grins nervously.

          2. Raven Nation

            “make your damn move! Any move!”

            Today you’d probably be hauled up before a people’s tribunal.

          3. WTF

            How not to be guilty of sexual harassment:
            1. Be attractive
            2. Don’t be unattractive

          4. Gustave Lytton

            *sigh*

            I’ll go turn myself in.

          5. cyto

            Evidence to support this rules list:

            I was playing wingman to a lady at work a few years back. Some guy came up and asked her name, introducing himself…. he offered to buy her a drink and she declined. He left.

            She said he was a creep. And gross for just walking up and offering to buy her a drink. Who does that?
            (He was just average looking.)

            Minutes later: Tall athletic dude from “hunk” central casting walks up and says “If I told you that you had a nice body, would you hold it against me?” Really… he went with that. Several extremely bad lines and a rather fumbled conversation later….. she left with him.

            When I asked her what was up with that…. she said she knew he was an idiot, but he just needed to shut up and look hot.

          6. tarran

            So, the pretty and clearly-into-some-kind-of-alternative-lifestyle receptionist just was telling me about one of her tattoos (opening with “I think you’d get a kick out of this”) and shared with me that her dad was – like me, a Navy vet.

            Fortunately for me, I am happily married and don’t have to waste any time contemplating whether this was flirtation or merely idle conversation that had a little too much sharing…

          7. cyto

            Ok, my turn. Out of my long, long list of “jeez, what an idiot” missed signals, You’ve prompted me to dredge up the memory of the Victoria’s Secret employee.

            My wife and I were shopping at the mall at the height of the thigh-high stocking craze of the 90’s. A very, very attractive little petite girl in a black mini skirt was helping us at Victoria’s Secret. I asked her if the thigh-highs were uncomfortable and in response she took us around to the back and lifted her skirt to show us hers. She said they were great…. and recommended the loose frill panties made of a sort of slip material to go with them. She said they were sooooo comfortable and lifted the frill for me to feel, showing her goods at the same time.

            I uncomfortably declined…. and did not get the hint. The wife had to clue me in after we left the store. I was kinda new to the “couples shopping together for lingerie” thing, so I think I suspected that maybe this was something that women do with each other that men just don’t do…. And I also suspected that it was a very effective sales technique…. I dropped a hundred bucks at a time when a hundred bucks was a lot of money for us to be spending.

            In a perhaps not unrelated development… she never really had trust issues with me and other women.

          8. Bobarian LMD

            So… you’re saying that one’s going into the spank bank?

    7. I still use the words “reckon” and “yonder” regularly. I get odd looks from folks once in a while.

      Once in a while I use “groovy,” too, just to watch how people react.

      1. I said to a kid the other day who is helping me with auction prep “if I had my druthers I’d set up the sale like …”

        He was flummoxed to say the least.

        1. He was unaccustomed to your mellifluous verbiage?

      2. Juan-Baptiste Emmanuel Seguin

        Heh, I do the same with “dope” and “fresh”

      3. C. Anacreon

        I also like to use groovy, far out, right on, etc., to see if people think I’m an old fuddy-duddy. Good times.

    8. “why did our grandparents need so many of them?”

      Life was hard?

  4. The Late P Brooks

    These are great words for determination, people with a spirit to get things done. Why are these words out of date?

    Ask President “You didn’t build that”.

  5. Just a thought not a sermon

    “should be selling beer at the concession stands because its at the fucking Staples Center.”

    What? How do they make any money? Isn’t that where most of the money is made at sporting events?

  6. Letter: Trump’s policies are Hitleresque

    As one who lost family to the Nazis, I was concerned about the last presidential election, but not as concerned as I should have been, viewing Donald Trump as an extreme libertarian interested in fame and fortune, but as otherwise apolitical. I did not recognize, then, that he could extend his coalition of extreme libertarians, fascists, and right-wing evangelicals to embrace moderates. But he has, and now I’m very worried.

    Recently the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) were given a list by government officials of seven terms that they are forbidden to use in official documents. These forbidden terms are “vulnerable,” “entitlement,” “diversity,” “transgender,” “fetus,” “evidence-based” and “science-based.”

    Words have power. Their power depends on the specific words, how they are used, and who is using them. When words are banned, the ideas underlying these words lose their power and ability to motivate and sustain us. Trump believes that deleting these terms from official documents will make the underlying issues go away.

    1. Tundra

      I thought the CDC thing was made-up horseshit.

      1. Count Potato

        “In other words, what happened regarding these other terms (“transgender,” “fetus,” “evidence-based,” and “science-based”) was not that retrograde Republicans ordered career CDC officials not to use these terms but that career CDC officials assumed retrograde Republicans would be triggered by such words and, in an effort to avoid having such Republicans cut their budgets, reasoned they might be best avoided. With regard to “evidence-based” and “science-based” in particular, I gather the reasoning was simpler than that, and that the group thought these terms are so overused in the CDC budget documents they were discussing as to become nearly meaningless and that their use should be limited to where it actually made a point.”

        http://www.nationalreview.com/corner/454752/cdc-did-not-ban-words-yuval-levin

        1. Akira

          “Budget documents” is a key distinction here. They’re just not allowed to use them when asking for money.

          The media portrayed this as Trump banning the use of those words within their departments at all.

    2. Just a thought not a sermon

      I think this person should be banned from using words like “libertarian” and “Hitleresque”, at least until he knows what they mean.

      1. Akira

        I wouldn’t be surprised if some dunderhead actually draws some parallel between Nazism and libertarianism. I’ve seen someone argue that Hitler and Stalin were individualists because “they prioritized themselves as individuals over the collective”.

        1. AlexinCT

          When I get this sort of shit response from the douchebags that are excusing marxism, I always ask the moron saying it where we can go find the saints that will then be needed to run the state…

      2. cyto

        This is where you insert the video of Inigo Montoya saying “You keep using that whord…”

    3. None of that letter is based in truth. Yet it got printed.

      1. AlexinCT

        NARRATIVE!

    4. People are always going to argue about what is right and wrong, but our Constitution guarantees the right of free speech. The people of the CDC must fight for their Constitutional rights, and we must fervently oppose Trump’s Hitleresque policies to ensure that our nation and its ideals continue to exist and thrive.

      This idiot doesn’t even understand how the First Amendment works. Or a departmental memo. Or the English language, for that matter.

      I wish I had a photo of him so I could add it to the gallery of idiots in the links.

      1. Rufus the Monocled

        I always wanted to start a ‘Woodchiippers Hall of Fame’.

      2. Pope Jimbo

        “the gallery of idiots”

        Wait. Was this why you asked me for a pic of myself recently?

        Uffda, it is Jr. High all over again.

      3. Raston Bot

        here’s a photo of Fred Singer, Professor of Biology at Radford University:

        http://www.radford.edu/~fsinger/index.htm

    5. Slammer

      A CDC sounds like an organization that Hitler would have been in big favor of

    6. Winston

      Donald Trump as an extreme libertarian

      Uh yeah.

      1. thom

        It’s funny because the letter is about how “words have power”.

    7. Rufus the Monocled

      Riiiight. Because the left doesn’t change language.

      Anyway check this guy out:

      “Larry N. Eaton · Catawba, Virginia
      More frightening than having a leader like trump is the cult like following and normalisation of neo-nazis and white supremacist. That should wake up most Americans to a clear and present danger that we are on a wrong path. A disturbing quote I recently read went something like this “America has to wake up to the reality that 1/3 of the population would kill 1/3 of the population while 1/3 of the population watched like Germany did” I hope that this is not even close to being true, but we definitely need to stand firmly against those who would promote hate and intolerance whether they be neo-nazis, kkk or religious right wing extremist.”

      lol

      Did these people actually READ the history of Nazi Germany?

      1. Suthenboy

        very few people who use those terms have any idea what they mean.

        1. AlexinCT

          It would require schools teach real history and what not..

      2. Slammer

        Where are these fuckers seeing neo-Nazis and KKK?

        Other than their fever-dreams?

      3. The Sleeper

        Every day I’m learning more about how Nazi Germany cut taxes for almost their entire populace and encouraged people and businesses to become productive and wealthy independent of government affect.

        1. thom

          Not to mention Hitler’s policy of clearly demarcating and enforcing the German border that existed at the time of his election.

          1. Akira

            It really irritates me that people actually draw parallels between deporting people who have entered the country illegally and wholesale genocide against both immigrants and native-born citizens.

            If you ask me, it’s spitting in the face of Holocaust victims.

    8. Suthenboy

      ‘Evidence-based’ and ‘Science-based’ are substitutes for evidence and science. They have no place in official documents.

      1. cyto

        I don’t agree with this.

        “Evidence-based” is actually needed, particularly in the medical field. They still have a lot of “in my experience” going on that world. And a whole lot of just made-up-from-whole-cloth nonsense. Inroads are being made, and at least on the drug side things are largely evidence-based, but they still have a long, long way to go.

        It also demarks a difference with “Complementary and Alternative Medicine”, which is by definition not based in any scientific evidence.

        Although I suspect that most uses of the terms are simply shorthand for “my opinion cannot be questioned because I am the expert”, which would not be a legitimate use of the term.

      2. Bobarian LMD

        Nope, they’re substitutes for “I don’t have any Science or evidence to back this up, but… Hey look at that squirrel!”

    9. Libby

      Shit like this makes me so ragey.

    10. When using the term Extreme Libertarianz, please omit the first e in the word extreme, and use a z in place of the s at the end of Libertarians.

      Thank you,

      Xtreme Libertarianz.

  7. Tundra

    Why weren’t they selling beer? Because it was NCAA?

    1. My friends (back when I had friends) and I would bring a pint of whiskey into the hockey games. Buy beer, make boilermakers, get trashed…???.. profit!

    2. Yeah. Elite 8 game where the Buckeyes lost to Wichita State. We got tore up though. So it didn’t sting too bad.

    3. Pope Jimbo

      Maybe the NCAA saw the Gophers lose money selling beer at $7.25/cup and decided it wasn’t worth it.

      Fuck our land grant university is a hive of villainy and ineptitude.

      1. WTF

        …the Gophers lose money selling beer at $7.25/cup

        How is that even possible?

        1. Pope Jimbo

          The list of startup expenses that cut into the school’s beer profits ranged from extra security to $12,000 in plants to screen the A gate beer kiosk from the view of visitors to the Tribal Nations Plaza.

          You think an organization that has a Tribal Nations Plaza gives a shit about making money? There was no booster who was willing to pay for a plaza named after them? I’m sure there was, but we would rather virtue signal than take that filthy money.

          Also, needing to shield beer sales from the delicate eyes of the Norwegian bluenoses is so very Minnesodan. It is why we only got Sunday liquor sales last year.

          1. cyto

            Which is absolutely bonkers in a state where drinking is kinda the number one leisure activity. That, and building a fire at the end of a dirt road in the dead of winter so you have something to stand around while drinking… at least that’s what I’ve been told is the high-school kids’ favorite pastime.

            Oh, and dragging an outhouse out onto a frozen lake along with a few cases of beer so you can sit around a hole in the ice with your buddies and drink beer.

          2. cyto

            Also…. they draw 45,000+. How the heck could they not recoup a $12k investment in a single game? Call it $5 in profit per beer – they gotta be able to move 10k beers in a game, netting $50,000. Unless they are so bottlenecked at the sales point that nobody can buy a beer.

          3. If you look closely, this is net the vendor’s share – they had a bad agreement with the people who actually did the selling.

  8. straffinrun

    Wanted: attractive young women wearing sexy underpants to serve as hostesses for British business bigwigs at drunken old-boys-only charity affair.

    Clearly the solution is to get more women bigwigs in on this orgy.

    1. Stinky Wizzleteats

      Like Theresa May?
      *pukes into trashcan*

  9. You know who else saw something good in Hitler…

    1. Just a thought not a sermon

      Marge Schott?

    2. The guy who did his autopsy?

      1. Chafed

        Winner^^^

    3. Old Man With Candy

      The Grand Mufti of Jerusalem?

    4. Slammer

      Blondi?

    5. RAHeinlein

      Dennis Wilson?

      1. straffinrun

        Are you guys still planning a trip here next week? Lemme know.

        1. RAHeinlein

          Barring any crisis, we are booked to arrive on Tuesday . Staying in Tokyo until Feb 4.

          1. straffinrun

            I’ll be in Shibuya on Saturday, Feb 3. Working there until 6 or so. If you guys are near there (Shinjuku, Shibuya, Tokyo etc), drinks would be fun.

          2. RAHeinlein

            We’re at the Park Hyatt (Shinjuku).

          3. straffinrun

            Nice hotel. Near the Tokyo Metropolitan building. Are you with kids or just your husband? I know a few places in Shinjuku. A friend of mine has a very small bar in a place called golden gai near Kabuki cho. Not kid friendly, though.

          4. RAHeinlein

            Just my husband.

          5. straffinrun

            If you guys want to slum it and meet some locals, that little bar might be interesting for a few drinks. I have to work Sunday morning, so I won’t be getting lamp shade on the head crazy. I’ll be going through Shinjuku station around 7 on that Saturday. If you have something else in mind, feel free to offer it up.

          6. RAHeinlein

            Those options sound great – exactly what we are interested-in experiencing. Please let me know where you would like to meet – my suggestion would be the Hyatt if not inconvenient for you.

          7. straffinrun

            Alright. Looks like it will be a little walk to the other side of the station, so I hope a little foot time is OK. Yeah, I can swing by the Hyatt at around 7. I may bring a Japanese buddy of mine. He grew up in Shinjuku, so he’ll know more about it than me. I’ll be on the am links for the next few nights, so let me know if anything changes.

          8. RAHeinlein

            No problem walking and the more the merrier. Looking forward to it!

          9. straffinrun

            Oh, yeah, sorry guys. Any of you other degenerates around that night, first round or three on me!

    6. Suthenboy

      Most of the Middle East?

    7. MikeS

      Hugo Boss?

    8. Private Chipperbot

      Neville Chamberlain?

      1. MikeS

        Ooh! Good one.

    9. Chipwooder

      Franz von Papen?

    10. Gerry Rigg

      Subhas Chandra Bose?

    11. Hitler?

      The answer is always Hitler.

    12. {|}===[|}:;:;:;:;:;:;:>

      King Edward VIII

  10. Atanarjuat

    The best part of the FBI story is knowing that those Deep State fucks put so much effort into their conspiracy to help elect Hillary and then imagining what election night was like for them.

    1. straffinrun

      They’re probably taking solace in the martyr complex they’ve constructed for themselves.

    2. Pope Jimbo

      “How can this be? We ran the data through the same program that we used for the Iraq war and Libya intervention and all the scenarios said that Hillary would win and be treated as a liberator. I don’t understand it.”

      The Deep State might not be so bad if it was at least competent. Sure they break the law, but at least they really are cracking down on terrorism and other bad stuff.

      Unfortunately you get the same staggering incompetence combined with higher levels of unlawfulness.

    3. thom

      This. Seems like they’re the types that imagine themselves as the real power in the room, quietly making the real decisions, etc, etc.

  11. This is why you can’t afford to buy a house

    Americans are desperate for more affordable housing. Yet 1.4 million residential properties were vacant as of 2017’s third quarter. Even more telling: 75 percent of those vacancies weren’t owned by a former occupant, but by an investor.

    Welcome to America’s new housing crisis.

    To understand real estate, you first need to understand land, which occupies a very weird place in market economies. Most goods and services respond to changes in price signals: The price goes up or down depending on whether demand or supply is stronger. It’s a self-correcting mechanism. For example, if a wheat shortage drives up the price per bushel, that price will fall when more wheat finally comes to market.

    Not so with land. No matter how much the price changes, the supply remains fixed. Which means the price can’t self-correct.

    Now throw skyrocketing inequality into the mix.

    1. The supply of wheat on the market is not the total amount of wheat in the world.

      The supply of land on the market is not the total amount of land in the world.

      The supply is the amount people who current have it are willing to sell at the current price. The easier it is to make a piece of property, the more production can be ramped up in response to a price spike. Land is expensive (not impossible) to make. So it’s a matter of “what price will the current owner see as suitable to part with their current lot.” The supply is that which is available to be traded, and that does respond to price, albeit with less elacticity than more cheaply produced property.

    2. Just a thought not a sermon

      Yeah, it’s investors. Those wreckers!

      Not zoning, regulations, historic districts, prohibitions on building because some endangered bug nobody’s seen in 50 years once resided in the area, or neighbors who somehow have a veto if a developer wants to build something blocks away from their house, but investors.

      1. What’s “zoning”?
        -resident of Harris County, TX

        1. Just a thought not a sermon

          And Houston has some of the lowest housing prices of any big city in the country. Amazing coincidence!

          1. I thought it was because in summer, people fled Houston for Hell to cool off.

          2. Pope Jimbo

            Hell also has some pretty strict zoning laws (at least according to Dante).

            So better weather AND more social contract shit than Houston.

        2. robc

          Despite not having zoning, Harris County still has land use regulations.

          Get off your high horse (originally typed high house), you aint that pure.

    3. Semi-Spartan Dad

      What an idiot. If anything has affected the normal supply and demand cycle for housing, it’s the over-regulation that prevents new housing from being built and all the new ridiculous codes that prevents it from being affordable (e.g., requiring $60 breakers instead the just fine $5 ones).

      1. Chipwooder

        Exactly. Because of this, it’s almost impossible to build an affordable new house. Since it’s impossible to build affordable new houses, all of the new housing developments around us is gargantuan half-million and up houses.

        1. thom

          Or even modify an existing one. I wanted to add 400 sq feet last year and realized it was going to cost me over $200K. All the contractors, however, acted as though they were doing me a favor even talking to me since they are so overbooked. Just doesn’t seem sustainable.

          1. RAHeinlein

            A lot of regulatory capture by developers/ancillary construction services related to remodel codes. Adding a light fixture and need to open a wall – now required to bring all electrical, etc to code.

          2. thom

            I had another room where I wanted to replace one of two windows in the room. Code required I replace both windows because neither of the existing windows qualify as “egress windows” under the updated code. I decided not to do it (because of $), so thanks to the building codes I have a room with two non-compliant windows instead of a room with at least one.

          3. cyto

            I had some similar results.

            One really nice one… I wanted to enclose a screened porch, as is common in the area.

            I was informed that I had to bring it up to code. Since there were new setback requirements in effect, this meant tearing the whole thing down and rebuilding it 2 feet wide.

            Needless to say, I declined to spend the money on that project.

    4. leonadasiv

      “Not so with land. No matter how much the price changes, the supply remains fixed. Which means the price can’t self-correct.”

      This person needs to review the definition of silly, with regards to economics. Because Todd is false.

      1. leonadasiv

        This*

        I mean Todd could be false too, but I don’t know about that one.

      2. leonadasiv

        Supply*

      3. Akira

        He doesn’t seem to understand that you can unlock new, usable land out of a desert, a swamp, a vacant lot, or an abandoned building. You can also improve the utilization of existing land by bulldozing a strip mall and replacing it with a skyscraper.

        1. AlexinCT

          I bet he understands quite well that the problem are the various things others mentioned, but he is not angling for a real solution at all. Rather the agenda here is again to push marxist bullshit as a better option than the crony state we have now.

    5. mexican sharpshooter

      Yes Investors. Typically these investors are 1-2 person LLC that buy the house via auction, then put $30k worth of work into it because the previous owner foreclosed and left a dookie on the countertop (if they’re lucky) and sell it at market value. Those sons of bitches.

    6. B.P.

      “Not so with land. No matter how much the price changes, the supply remains fixed.”

      Hey Jeff, look out the airplane window when you’re flying from DC to your vineyard getaway in Napa sometime.

    7. No matter how much the price changes, the supply remains fixed.

      BULLSHIT.

  12. The Late P Brooks

    Odious boor crashes party

    There is no bigger story at the World Economic Forum than the first appearance of an American leader since 2000. Trump is expected to talk once more about the glories of his “America First” domestic and foreign policy, touting the supposed roaring success of the U.S. economy under his watch and reaffirming the nativist tenets that underline his worldview. He is also expected to extend a hand to a probably wary audience, pitching America as open for business and investment.

    “This is about an America First agenda. But America First does mean working with the rest of the world,”said Treasury Secretary Steve Mnuchin at a morning press conference. “It just means that President Trump is looking out for American workers and American interests no different than he expects other leaders would look out for their own.”

    “Supposed roaring success of the US economy”?
    I’m firmly in the “DJIA is not the economy” camp, but I have to marvel at their determination to deny admitting the obvious reality on the ground.

    1. Just a thought not a sermon

      I noted a few weeks ago how I learned that black unemployment had reached a historic low because Suthenboy mentioned it on here, and I did a Google search for articles. Barely a mention in the mainstream press.

    2. Brett L

      2-4% impromptu bonuses to employees making at or below the median income is also not a roaring success in an economy.

      1. These numbers do seem to indicate that we may soon have something that could be called a success.

        1. KSuellington

          The first three articles from a google search all specifically state in their headlines that the low black unemployment rate has nothing to do with Trump.

          1. Whose articles were they? Did you check what their arguments said?

      2. Akira

        But you see, those are just bribes from evil corporations to keep their workers in that False Consciousness™ so that they’ll continue voting against Their Own Interests™.

  13. Private Chipperbot
  14. Tundra

    The Islamization of Oslo

    Police efforts to get Groruddalen under control in recent years have been a bust. One problem is the difficulty of getting official permission for police to carry firearms—a policy change furiously opposed by Norwegian politicians and journalists. Another is the inability of top Oslo police officials to face up to the situation in the valley. (They couldn’t have been happy when a Stovner-based policeman admitted in a broadcast interview that cops avoided parts of Groruddalen out of fear, along with the sense that it would be “unthinkable” for them to enter.) But the fundamental problem remains the traditional Scandinavian approach to crime: seeking out root causes, treating offenders as victims of society, and seeing compassion as a cure for criminality.

    Interesting how the same story plays out in France, Britain, Finland, Sweden and now Norway. Oh, well. I’m sure they meant well.

    Also, I was a little surprised to read that the Norwegian cops don’t carry.

    1. Suthenboy

      “I’m sure they meant well.”

      Foreseeable consequences are not unintended. They imported bazillions of ready-made useful idiots to gum up society. Bring in savages, you get savagery.

      Things are turning out exactly as they intended.

      1. antisthenes

        Pretty much this. You don’t thaw out Simon Phoenix because you have good intentions.

        1. {|}===[|}:;:;:;:;:;:;:>

          He doesn’t even know how to use the shells.

  15. The Late P Brooks

    Now throw skyrocketing inequality into the mix.

    No.

    1. SandMan

      I read that as some people having better rockets than I do, NOT FAIR!

  16. Derpetologist

    the latest and silliest moral outrage

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bczH7OPRpsM

    synopsis: A Swedish clothing company made a line of jungle-themed clothes for kids. In the advertisement, a black child is pictured wearing a hoodie that says “coolest monkey in the jungle”. Naturally, the people who are hypersensitive to these things had a fit and eventually gangs of miscreants started trashing their stores while hooting like monkeys. The company apologized and the mother of the child model tried to calm things, but to no avail.

    1. So they’re saying there was a cooler monkey?

      1. Private Chipperbot

        Dang. Your comment reminded me of The Sand Pebbles. Need to watch that again soon.

        1. l0b0t

          DO IT! Go watch it right now; it’s such a fine film. Steve McQueen in a sailor suit firing a BAR from the hip makes me question my heterosexuality; he is approaching Tom of Finland territory.

          1. Lie back and think of him beating the shit out of Ali McGraw.

          2. l0b0t

            LOVE IT! I just spit up some coffee. I made wifey watch The Getaway last week; she was only familiar with the Baldwin/Basinger remake. She came away from it wanting to murder Sally Struthers.

          3. C. Anacreon

            Wow, right now I’m at a work event in a hotel conference room, which is, no lie, The Sand Pebble Room. *Twilight Zone theme plays*

  17. The Late P Brooks

    Also, I was a little surprised to read that the Norwegian cops don’t carry.

    I can’t help thinking we’d be better off if the majority of our cops were disarmed.

    1. And/or the majority of our citizens armed.

    2. thom

      Mandate that adult citizens in good standing carry. Prohibit cops from carrying. Make refusing to assist a police officer in distress a grave legal offense. Watch police actually turn into the deeply respected professionals they currently think they are.

  18. After The Hawaii Missile Scare, Pornhub Had Some Hilarious Data To Share

    Yep, Pornhub did a study of the data they received after the crisis, and it turns out immediately after Hawaiians knew they were safe, they were more than happy to check out some naked people bumping uglies.

    However, in the period where the crisis was in full effect, almost no one was on the site. Which goes to show that at least there is some morality left in the world.

    Search tags: Magnum PI shorts

    1. AlexinCT

      Want to tell me nobody said “This is it, I need to rub one out quick?”

  19. Drake

    NBC: Did McCabe Sandbag Flynn Into An Obstruction Charge?

    Probably. I doubt he would have shown up at a meeting with the FBI without a lawyer if he thought they were investigating him rather than having a working meeting related to the NSA. I think he would have fought the whole thing if they hadn’t threatened his kids. Scumbags.

    1. WTF

      This is why I don’t understand Trump’s supposed willingness to be interviewed by Mueller. It’s just an obvious attempt to set up some kind of process-related charge that has nothing to do with the stated purpose of the investigation.

      1. Chipwooder

        My guess is that Trump is just talking out of his ass (shocking, I know!) and has no actual intention of talking to Mueller.

        1. straffinrun

          His lawyers would never let him talk to them under oath.

          1. WTF

            It doesn’t matter, if Trump’s recollection of something is different than FBI “records”, Trump is guilty of lying to the FBI.

          2. AlexinCT

            ^^^^^THIS^^^^^

        2. Drake

          I would bet money they never talk – unless it’s a meeting where Trump fires him.

  20. straffinrun

    http://theweek.com/articles/750337/republicans-full-illuminatiRepublicans go full Illuminati

    In this bizarre fantasy world, the FBI — as conservative an agency as you’ll find in the federal government — is actually an organization committed to destroying Donald Trump, so gripped is it with pro-Democratic bias.

    1. Drake

      Being members of Congress, there is a simple way to break the FBI fucks who are stonewalling. Defund an destroy the agency. Start writing bills right now.

      Take away their fancy Hostage Rescue Team and give to the Marshals. Close down their palatial Quatinco academy. Strip away their funds and their responisbilities until there is nothing and fire everyone left.

      1. straffinrun

        Send in the US Marshals. That’s what I keep hearing. Wonder what that would entail.

        1. Drake

          An order from the Attorney General. They are part of the DOJ.

      2. invisible finger

        Exactly right. And I love how it shows just how much taxpayer money Maobama was willing to waste.

        Calling him Chocolate Nixon is too kind. Maybe Chocolate Maduro is more appropriate.

      3. If I were president, I’d be pardoning people in prison for killing FBI agents.

    2. kbolino

      the FBI — as conservative an agency as you’ll find in the federal government

      I don’t think that says what they think it says.

    3. Just watch The X-Files. They openly admit FBI at war with Trump.

  21. LJW

    TheWrap also talked to a chiropractor who treated Lewis, Dr. Kaisa Coppola. Coppola, who spoke to TheWrap at Lewis’ request, said she began treating Lewis in June of 2014 for lower back pain and digestive issues, but said it soon became evident that Lewis’ medical issues were “absolutely related” to her encounter with Copperfield.

    “As a doctor I can tell you that pain has created ripples of health effects,” Coppola said. “When you are taken advantage of at such a young age, it’s going to produce a hormonal reaction that is then going to have continued effects. it’s going to create a trauma reaction which will then trigger Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder.”

    Ah that’s cute he thinks he’s a real doctor.

    1. LJW

      *she thinks

    2. chiropractor

      I have some co-workers who swear by their chiropractor, who “straightens” their backs.

      I always say: “You know you could work out, do some weightlifting to strengthen your back.”

      Them: “But then my back would get hurt!”

      1. Pope Jimbo

        I like my chiropractor when I have a flare up in my back from an old injury. He helps with the short term pain. He was a former trainer for the Detroit Lions and also gave me a good set of exercises to do to help.

        But yes, like all chiropractors he does veer off into the weeds about the magical ability of chiropracty to solve all illnesses.

        I just view him as a specialized physical therapist.

        1. Chipwooder

          This. I’ve been to a chiropractor from time to time for back pain and it’s done the job every time, but I roll my eyes whenever he starts telling me about all of the other wonderful benefits I could get from chiropractic if I would just come in more often.

          1. Private Chipperbot

            It cures allergies!

          2. of the other wonderful benefits I HE could get from chiropractic if I would just come in more often.

            FIFY.

    3. Negroni Please

      I’m most confused by this line:
      “‘My therapist later told me that he made me write a contract to keep me quiet,’ she said.”

      WTF? Is this a hypnotherapy “recovered” memory?

    1. Slammer

      ?

    1. RAHeinlein

      IIRC, 30 is a-bit old for John.

    2. The Elite Elite

      I thought John was into fatties? Not curvy attractive women.

      1. SugarFree

        Look at John Jr. over here.

        1. The Elite Elite

          What’s so bad about her? Nicely tanned skin tone. Big breasts. Not too much fat on the belly, legs, and arms. She’s not bad looking, that’s for sure. Quite frankly it seems silly for her to be labeled a “plus sized” model.

          1. SugarFree

            If I can’t be mean to people on the Internet, what am I left with? My dead-end job? My crumbling personal relationships? My elderly cat and broken down body?

            Can’t I have anything?

          2. Wait, you were trying to be mean?

            I must have missed it.

          3. SugarFree

            If I suggest to someone that they are in any way like John, it is one of the worst insults I can muster.

          4. I’m disappointed. I thought you were smart enough to get it.

          5. The Elite Elite

            You can have your hat and hair stories.

    3. Evan from Evansville

      Psh. Totally would.

    4. Private Chipperbot

      Ugh. A neck tat? I guess she can tilt her head back and the roll will cover it.

  22. The Late P Brooks

    I noted a few weeks ago how I learned that black unemployment had reached a historic low because Suthenboy mentioned it on here, and I did a Google search for articles. Barely a mention in the mainstream press.

    Those aren’t legitimate jobs.

    1. Just a thought not a sermon

      Not enough community organizers.

  23. Winston

    Looks like 4 more years of Wynne.

    http://www.cbc.ca/amp/1.4503040

    1. Isn’t she the one who’s harassing Tim Horton’s because her minimum wage hike forced them to cut back on staff benefits?

      1. Winston

        Yes. She was in trouble in the June election but who knows…

  24. MikeS

    Burton said Lewis called her and said Copperfield used a pseudonym when checking them into the hotel: “Simon Templar,”

    Can’t this guy come up with a pseudonym that isn’t a character from a book?

  25. I’m Poppy is as weird as its namesake YouTube star, but less intriguing

    Poppy’s videos never draw a clear distinction between Poppy’s “real” life and her constructed reality. She’s a pop star who is, to some extent, a fictional character. And as her following has grown, she’s expanded outside the bounds of her YouTube channel. She released a studio album called Poppy.Computer last fall, followed by a live tour. One member of her devoted fanbase (known as Poppy Seeds) has even founded a religion known as Poppyism. Now, she’s appearing in a full-length web series.

    I’m Poppy, a 24-minute short film that premieres on YouTube Red tomorrow, is supposed to channel the weirdness of Poppy’s short videos into a more traditional TV series pilot. The video, written and produced by her collaborator Titanic Sinclair, is certainly weird. But unlike most of Poppy’s videos, it straightforwardly explains its weirdness — unless that’s just another feint in an elaborate narrative game.

    1. straffinrun

      Or it’s some people fucking around with some simple psychological concepts. Nah, let’s go with the illuminati.

      1. Private Chipperbot

        I’m Titanic.

        1. I’m Spartacus.

          1. MikeS

            I’m Batman.

          2. J. Frank Parnell

            I’m Tulpa and so are you.

          3. I’m Chevy Chase, and you’re not.

    2. Suthenboy

      Poppy seeds. This made me laugh.

      1. I have a feeling that SugarFree is somehow involved in this.

        1. SugarFree

          Only in the sense that I am jealous to not have thought of it.

    3. Rufus the Monocled

      Didn’t Andy Kaufman already do this?

  26. Winston

    So does this mean that Turdeau Jr. Has some dirt on Andrew Scheer to be released in Summer of 2019?

  27. RoadSplosives

    Working at beautiful Camp Ripley, MN today. Very nice crew out here so far. Mostly National Guard staffed. Hoping the fog lifts.

    1. Private Chipperbot
    2. Gah! When I was younger, our Division HQ was there (47th Div) Turn their patch upside down and it is the FLYING JOCKSTRAP.

      1. RoadSplosives

        That is an unfortunate logo!

        We are currently raking through piles of wettish sand looking for 30mm spent rounds. It’s 23 degrees and 92% humidity.

        That’s why we make the big bucks. Oh, wait…

        1. Tundra

          Why?

          See if they’ll let you drive a tank.

  28. Count Potato

    “50 Cent Accidentally Made Millions by Accepting Bitcoin for His Last Album
    Since it was announced in early 2017 that 50 Cent was no longer bankrupt, the rapper-turned-mogul’s financial situation keeps taking wild new turns in positive directions. Last July, he sold a $60 million share in Effen Vodka, and now it’s been revealed that he made millions by getting into the suddenly trendy cryptocurrency game early.

    According to a report from TMZ, 50 became the first rapper to accept bitcoin as payment for his Animal Ambition album upon its 2014 release. The project reportedly earned him 700 bitcoins in total. At the time, each bitcoin was worth $662, so 50 pocketed approximately $463,000 in sales.

    Sources tell TMZ that 50 left all 700 bitcoins sitting in his account for years, during which time the cryptocurrency coin rose from relative obscurity to become a money-printing machine. With bitcoin’s current value sitting right around $11,000, 50’s 700 coins are now worth over $7 million.”

    http://www.complex.com/music/2018/01/50-cent-bitcoin-millions-album-payment

    1. Mr Lizard

      So name change to Fifdy-bit?

      1. straffinrun

        Two bytes?

        1. No, Four Bits.

          It will both be fifty cents, and half a byte (so he’s still half a pimary unit of measure. I’ll give you that two bytes is half a 32-bit word, but it’s also a full 16-bit word…)

      2. invisible finger

        Four bit

      3. J. Frank Parnell

        Ten Bees

  29. Pope Jimbo

    The more things change the more they stay the same.

    Hennepin County Attorney Mike Freeman is going to use a grand jury to decide on whether to press charges against Mohamed Noor for shooting Justine Damond.

    Mike Freeman made a big show of not using a grand jury for Philando Castile when he was murdered. Now it seems he has chickened out in the Justine Damond murder and will use it.

    1. leonadasiv

      So this guy is a colossal dick.

      1. Stinky Wizzleteats

        So, sandbag the grand jury presentation and chalk it up to “Sorry, we tried.” Sound about right?

        1. Pope Jimbo

          The contrarian in me wants him to do exactly that. I want him to not charge Noor at all. Then I want to see if BLM protests at all.

          Alternatively if a bunch of white women form WWM (white women matter) to protest police brutality, how will the main stream media handle it?

        2. Tundra

          Maybe, but this is a really bad one for Freeman. Minneapolis is a political cesspool – either way you will have major blowback. Charge the asshole and you will have every community activist on TV every night screaming about how bad it is for the Somali community or some shit. DOn’t charge and you will have a lot of pissed off, wealthy South Minne proggies raising hell. It’s why Freeman has been dragging his feet.

          I am still waiting to hear just why the fuck the cops searched her house after the shooting (actually, I know it was to try to find something incriminating so they could craft a narrative. Fuckers knew it was a bad shoot from the first minute)

        3. thom

          I’ve seen speculation that he’s using the Grand Jury to subpoena cops who are refusing to talk with his office and force them to testify under oath.

          1. Pope Jimbo

            I’ve seen that too. The problem is that if you have a grand jury, the decision to charge has to come from them and no longer from his office.

            You can’t have a grand jury to compel testimony and then use a separate process to decide whether to charge or not. (At least I don’t think so).

            I really don’t know about the legality of all of this. It just seems like a distraction.

  30. Schneider: The Me Too movement is not hysteria

    Since the “Me Too” movement has taken hold, it’s received significant coverage as numerous sexual assault claims are brought against various celebrities and influential men. Recently however, some have criticized the movement for transforming into a witch hunt of sorts. The movement’s critics claim that its only objective is to tarnish the reputations of those in the limelight and sensationalize sexual assault.

    I resent this idea. The “Me Too” movement is one of empowerment — cultural revelation that signifies a turning point in the treatment and equality of women. This should not be dismissed as hysteria. Some critics feel the movement is embodying female helplessness by reverting to old ideas of sexual violence and women without agency. However, the focus should remain on dismantling a sex culture that urges women to prioritize the desires of men above their own. Don’t allow the fear of destroying the careers of talented men distract us from this.

    1. Schneider

      I was hoping for a hot take from everybody else involved in “One Day At A Time”, not just Schneider. Especially the super-hot-at-the-time Valerie Bertinelli.

  31. The Late P Brooks

    A conspiracy of petulant thumbsuckers

    A growing number of Davos attendees are planning to walk out of US president Donald Trump’s speech at the World Economic Forum this Friday (Jan. 26), several conference-goers told Quartz, to protest his remarks about African countries earlier this month.

    Trump repeatedly called African countries “shitholes” in a closed-door meeting about immigration, attendee Senator Dick Durbin and others have said.

    Boycotting Trump’s Davos speech was first broached by Business Leadership South Africa CEO (and Davos attendee) Bonang Mohale in an open letter. Leaving Trump’s speech after he starts is probably more powerful than boycotting it entirely, some Davos attendees speculate.

    At this year’s graduation ceremony at the University of Notre Dame, dozens of students and their families silently stood up and walked out as vice president Mike Pence spoke about freedom of speech.

    IGNORANCE IS STRENGTH

    That’ll show him.

    1. Why the fuck is our President and/or Dick Durbin attending this event on our dime?

    2. WTF

      Trump repeatedly called African countries “shitholes” in a closed-door meeting about immigration, attendee Senator Dick Durbin and others have said.

      They misspelled “reportedly”. Because Trump and a couple of others present say that he didn’t say shitholes.

      1. Pope Jimbo

        Have we discussed the idiocy on the 5th Column podcast yet?

        Welch and Moynihan were properly outraged that a President used the word shitholes. They didn’t stop and consider that it was supposed to have been a private conversation. Nope. It was horrible. It is so damaging to our interests. So I guess you are supposed to censor your language at all times. It is like LBJ never existed.

        Also, if it is so damaging for the world to hear about the president using the word “shitholes” why did Durbin leak it? If he kept his mouth shut, no one would have known and the US interest would be undamaged.

        1. WTF

          Also, if it is so damaging for the world to hear about the president using the word “shitholes” why did Durbin leak it?

          Because your party’s power is much more important than the welfare of the nation.

          1. Drake

            Imagine if butthurt Republicans had run out of LBJ’s office every time he used bad language.

        2. Brett L

          I had to stop listening. The amount of high dudgeon that Trump is high priest of the religion they claim not to have was killing me.

          1. Pope Jimbo

            I hate to admit it, but I sort of like the way Kmele gigs them about the fact that Trump is no better or no worse than all the others who came before him.

            It drives the others to distraction as they scream about him being a special kind of bad because he won’t go through the normal kabuki dance that is expected from pols.

          2. AlexinCT

            This is what angers these credentialed tools the most: he won’t let them set the tune…

        3. Libby

          Sometimes I read reddit/politics or reddit/news to see what the idiots are shrieking about and even a significant number of those mouthbreathers were saying that Durbin was wrong for spreading what was said in a private conversation.

      2. And even if he did, so fucking what? He made an accurate statement. The nations referred to are shitholes.

  32. Derpetologist

    US Special Forces unable to scale border wall prototypes
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_BlD61vodZI

    OK, how about digging under it?

      1. AlexinCT

        Demolition?

    1. That says a lot more about the abilities/problem solving of our special forces than the effectiveness of the wall.

    2. Suthenboy

      They didn’t have a ladder?

    3. l0b0t

      ::raises hand:: Why would one assign the task of breaching obstacles, either for real or in a test, to a small infantry unit whose primary distinction is being proficient in a foreign language? Were there no Combat Engineer, Sea Bee, or Assault Marine units available?

      1. Were there no Combat Engineer, Sea Bee, or Assault Marine units available?

        What does building bridges, laying airstrips or getting drunk in port have to do with scaling walls?

        1. Brett L

          Have you ever seen a wall big enough to stop a Marine from getting drunk?

          1. Yes.

            Now already drunk marines have gotten into surprising places (and been stopped by embarassingly easy obstacles too)

          2. Drake

            If the beer was on the other side of the wall, they would find a way.

        2. l0b0t

          …getting drunk in port…

          Most excellent! I would have expected a plasma pistol/chainsword quip from you but you took it in a different direction and it paid off.

          1. Well, if you were going to make a 40k reference – Assault Marines can take jump packs, which make the walls moot.

          2. l0b0t

            I once took great delight in arming my squads with jump packs and dual plasma pistols; leaping into melee with 20 following-fire weapons takes out ork and eldar bosses quick as a wink.

          3. My only experience with Assault marines tabletop was on the receiving end. The Marine player saw an undersized squad with a commissar and decided to leap into melee. Discovered the hard way it was my HQ. Company Commander and Lord Commissar with power swords diced the assault marines.

          4. l0b0t

            NICE! I was primarily a Guard (later Ork) player and love me some Commissars. Also, Human Bombs and Penal Legions for forcing openings and Whiteshields to screen the Roughriders while they exploit them.

          5. Units missing from the 8th edition Guard Codex:

            Penal Legionnaires
            Rough Riders

            I guess GW got tired of the innuendo.

      2. {|}===[|}:;:;:;:;:;:;:>

        Marines phasing out the assaultman billet sadly.

    4. thom

      Since illegal immigrants will surely find a way to scale it, it seems like there will be an unexpected benefit as our special forces learn new skills through observation.

    1. In that first list, notice what became of those words – The Saxon terms coninuted as the names of the animals because that’s what the farmers used. The French terms became the name of the food, because the people using those words didn’t have to deal with the animals directly (being imported aristocracy and general suck-ups from the locals)

      1. Winston

        I find it pretty interesting how for centuries the aristocracy did not speak English and the courts and parliament spoke French. This has changed but many legal terms are of French origin like mortgage, warranty or plaintiff.

        Also this means our current legal system has been influenced by foreign Invaders whose influence is still felt.

        Oh and much of our ideas for liberty were the Result of foreign invasion as well.

    2. Negroni Please

      Oddly enough I was an Anglo-Saxonist in a former life. My preferred way to drive home the point that Latinate vocabulary we inherited from the Normans is stuffy and lame compared to our monosyllabic Germanic linguistic origins is this simple example. Would you rather:

      Insert your penis into a vagina and copulate until completion?
      Or
      Stick your dick in a cunt and fuck it til you cum?

    3. Evan from Evansville

      My favorites for these are legal terms that use two words to describe the crime, where one term is Latin in origin and the other Germanic.

      Breaking and entering.
      Law and order.
      Aid and abet.
      Null and void.
      Cease and desist.

      Legal douplet

    4. Derpetologist

      ***
      In the 16th and 17th centuries, controversy over needless foreign borrowings from Latin and Greek (known as “inkhorn terms”) was rife. Critics argued that English already had words with identical meanings. However, many of the new words gained an equal footing with the native Germanic words, and often replaced them.

      Writers such as Thomas Elyot flooded their writings with foreign borrowings, whilst writers such as John Cheke sought to keep their writings “pure”. Cheke wrote:

      I am of this opinion that our own tung should be written cleane and pure, unmixt and unmangeled with borowing of other tunges; wherein if we take not heed by tiim, ever borowing and never paying, she shall be fain to keep her house as bankrupt.

      In reaction, some writers tried either to resurrect older English words, such as gleeman for musician, sicker (itself an early borrowing from Latin sēcūrus) for certainly, inwit for conscience, and yblent for confused, or to make new words from Germanic roots, e.g. endsay for conclusion, yeartide for anniversary, foresayer for prophet. However, few of these words remain in common use.

      Modern English[edit]

      William Barnes, a noted advocate of English linguistic purism
      A noted advocate of English linguistic purism was 19th-century English writer, poet, minister, and philologist William Barnes, who sought to make scholarly English easier to understand without a classical education. Barnes lamented the “needless inbringing” of foreign words, instead using native words from his own dialect and coining new ones based on Old English roots. These included speechcraft for grammar, birdlore for ornithology, fore-elders for ancestors and bendsome for flexible. Another 19th-century poet who supported linguistic purism was Gerard Manley Hopkins. He wrote in 1882, “It makes one weep to think what English might have been; for in spite of all that Shakespeare and Milton have done … no beauty in a language can make up for want of purity”.[1]

      In his 1946 essay “Politics and the English Language”, George Orwell wrote:

      Bad writers—especially scientific, political, and sociological writers—are nearly always haunted by the notion that Latin or Greek words are grander than Saxon ones.
      ***

      https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Linguistic_purism_in_English

      1. xenography always looks smarter than it is.

  33. Grumpy Cat snatches lump of cash in California court

    A California jury gave the furry frown queen more than $700,000 this week in a federal lawsuit over the use of her identity.

    According to documents obtained by The Washington Post, owner Tabatha Bundesen of Morristown, Arizona, won the lawsuit first filed three years ago against the Grenade beverage company.

    She signed on for the cat to endorse a “Grumpy Cat Grumpuccino,” but the company subsequently used the cat’s image to help sell other products, which an eight-person jury on Monday found was unauthorized.

  34. Count Potato

    “Dolphins ‘deliberately get high’ on puffer fish nerve toxins by carefully chewing and passing them around

    Dolphins are thought of as one of the most intelligent species in the animal kingdom – and experts believe they have put their ingenuity to use in the pursuit of getting “high”.

    In extraordinary scenes filmed for a new documentary, young dolphins were seen carefully manipulating a certain kind of puffer fish which, if provoked, releases a nerve toxin.

    Though large doses of the toxin can be deadly, in small amounts it is known to produce a narcotic effect, and the dolphins appeared to have worked out how to make the fish release just the right amount.

    Carefully chewing on the puffer and passing it between one another, the marine mammals then enter what seems to be a trance-like state.”

    http://www.independent.co.uk/environment/nature/dolphins-deliberately-get-high-on-puffer-fish-nerve-toxins-by-carefully-chewing-and-passing-them-9030126.html

    I was gonna get a job at Seaworld then I got high.

    1. leonadasiv

      “Dolphins are thought of as one of the most intelligent species in the animal kingdom – and experts believe they have put their ingenuity to use in the pursuit of getting “high”.”

      If they were so smart, they’d move out of their parents pod and get a real job.

    2. something dolphin rape something SEA SMITH

    3. Not to worry, Sessions is on it.

      1. WTF

        Puffer fish epidemic!!!

    4. Slammer

      And here comes the asshole Orca: “Intercepted!”

    5. topnotchtoledo

      Puff puff pass is good drug etiquette

  35. Nephilium

    More inside information escapes Google. This one accidentally shared publicly (but gave permission to keep it public) by an engineer who’s leaving Google.

    1. thepasswordispassword

      The only culture war meat is at the beginning. But I’m 100% on board with the main thrust of the rant that Google is garbage at APIs. I’ve looked at doing a few side projects that would integrate their services and immediately reached for the nearest alternative, usually microsoft services because if there’s one thing that they know it’s developers developers developers. That one paragraph worth of culture war is distilled prog bubble though.

  36. T H I C C

    http://archive.is/lIaQ1

    Number 5 can shamefully reject me any time.

    1. #17: Bobba Fett’s got some weird curves. I guess that time with the Sarlacc had an effect on him.

  37. Derpetologist

    ‘Full Frontal’ correspondents are serious about apologizing for Trump
    https://www.cnn.com/2018/01/24/entertainment/samantha-bee-correspondents-apology-race/index.html

    ***
    “Full Frontal’s” Allana Harkin and Ashley Nicole Black have said sorry countless times over the past two weeks.

    The correspondents have been traveling the globe, apologizing to as many people as possible for President Trump.
    Host Samantha Bee will reveal the “winner” of the “Full Frontal” apology race during Wednesday’s episode.
    CNN recently caught up with the comediennes, who also write for and produce Bee’s weekly late-night show.
    From DACA recipients to Hurricane Maria survivors, Harkin and Black said there were plenty of folks ready to hear some remorse — even if it wasn’t from the president himself.
    ***

    Comedy!

    1. I remember when late night shows were at least occasionally funny. Those were good times.

      1. Winston

        I remember when Jon Stewart and his I’ll weren’t political propaganda. Wait when the fuck that?!

        1. Winston

          *his ilk*

    2. Private Chipperbot

      Ugh. That’s so dumb. The commercials are non-stop. And racist. One of the ‘correspondents’ is yelling sorry and pointedly tells a white guy he doesn’t get a sorry.

    3. Stinky Wizzleteats

      I swear to fucking God, I hate Samantha Bee and everyone involved with her shithole of a show.

    4. The Elite Elite

      So, should Crowder have the people working for him go around the world apologizing for Justin Trudeau?

      1. This ‘skit’ by Bee’s people is really just finding a way to get the company to pay for their vacation.

        The appropriate response would be not around the world appologising for Trudy, just around a corner of Texas.

    5. Just Say’n

      Ban immigration from Canada

  38. Count Potato

    “Brooklyn Pizzeria Finally Invents Pizza That Looks Like Tide Pods

    The pods in question are stuffed with pepperoni and have mozzarella swirls on top that are dyed bright blue and orange — just enough WTF to perhaps act as a “gateway food” that lures Tide Pod eaters back to lives of real sustenance.”

    http://www.grubstreet.com/2018/01/vinnies-pizzeria-tide-pod-pizza.html

    At least they don’t have pineapple.

  39. Rufus the Monocled

    I still keep hearing ‘trickle down economics.’ Is that even a real thing?

    1. Akira

      It’s a smear term for any non-“progressive” version of economics. The term “trickle down” was never actually used by anyone who was advocating a supply-side or free market point of view.

      It’s a strawman argument, basically. They think the idea is “give the rich special tax breaks and subsidies, and the wealth will trickle down“. In reality, the view of most laissez-faire proponents is that the rich being rich should not be treated as some kind of evil thing that has to be stamped out. The existence of rich people does not make other people poorer; in fact, accumulation of capital in the hands of a small group is quite necessary for things like new factories or investment in a new technology.

  40. Derpetologist

    Conan shares angry Haitians’ message to Trump
    Haitians want President Trump to hear their point of view and Conan knows a surefire way to get the President’s attention.

    https://www.cnn.com/videos/entertainment/2018/01/25/conan-delivers-angry-haitians-message-to-trump.team-coco

    He jokes he will move to Haiti if the US does not get a new president soon.

    1. leonadasiv

      Why would that be a joke. It’s not like Haiti is a shithole it something.

    2. Winston

      How many rich white guys live in Haiti?

    3. Rufus the Monocled

      Conan is the classic and latest example of a smart-alec who thinks he’s smarter than he really is.

      These people never spend a single moment of intellectual reflection as a matter of principle. They just come out of the woodworks when their guy is not in power and feel all wobbly in the head whenever someone different comes along. Had they been truly informed, they would take it all with a level head.

      Instead, they engage in emotional trickery, lies and obfuscation.

      Conan is good at what he does but should perhaps consider remaining in his lane if this is the topic he chooses to try and shame a President.

  41. Derpetologist

    ABC: ‘Secret society’ text may have been a joke
    https://www.cnn.com/2018/01/25/politics/abc-news-fbi-secret-society-text/index.html

    Yeah, that’s the ticket!

    ***
    A text message between two FBI agents that launched days of speculation of a “secret society” plot against President Donald Trump may have been a joke, ABC News reported.

    Conservatives have seized on the exchange between FBI lawyer Lisa Page and FBI agent Peter Strzok, which was sent after the 2016 presidential election, as potential evidence of an anti-Trump bias at the FBI. Strzok was a member of the FBI team investigating Hillary Clinton’s email server and, later, a member of Robert Mueller’s special counsel operation looking into Russia’s attempted interference in the 2016 election.
    “The day after the election, the day after what they really, really didn’t want to have happen, there’s a text exchange between these two FBI agents, these supposed to be objective, fact-centric FBI agents, saying perhaps this is the first meeting of the ‘secret society,’” House Oversight Committee Chairman Trey Gowdy, R-South Carolina, said on Fox News this week.
    But ABC News reported Wednesday night that it got a copy of the text message Republicans appear to be referring to. The report said that from the message, it’s not clear whether the reference to a “secret society” was a joke.
    ***

    1. leonadasiv

      I am waiting for this memo.

    2. Tonio

      Everything I’ve read seems to point to joke. But it’s not the sort of joke an FBI agent ought to be making so an investigation is indeed warranted. Even if nothing comes of the investigation it will send a message to federal government employees. Also, good to see them on the receiving end of the process as punishment.

      1. R C Dean

        Everything I’ve read seems to point to joke.

        Meaning comes from context, and in the context of what we know about DOJ/FBI/Fusion GPS/DNC collusion to get Hillary elected and keep Trump out of the White House, I am not so sure at all this is a joke.

        1. commodious spittoon

          It seems like the sort of joke that’s just a bit too earnest to be jokey, like when you’re flirting with a girl and you’re trying to be jocular but you come on a bit too strong because you’re really into her. No, I don’t think Strzok or Page were literally going to form a cabal of anti-Trump conspirators. But a clique of hostile prosecutors who are willing to bend the rules against Trump in the same way they did to favor Clinton? Well, duh.

          1. R C Dean

            No, I don’t think Strzok or Page were literally going to form a cabal of anti-Trump conspirators.

            I think its pretty clear there actually was a cabal of anti-Trump conspirators, isn’t it?

          2. commodious spittoon

            I just mean the trappings of conspiracy and ritual don’t have to be literal even if the general sentiment of “Let’s get him” are there. It’s safe to assume Strzok was joking about the secret society and the insurance policy. The fact that he felt confident making jokes of that nature is plenty indicative by itself. And the whole thing hinges on sentiment rather than factuality. They’ll nail Trump’s hide to the wall if they can get him on a process violation, even if they never come close to proving an underlying crime. I think it’s a mistake to focus too granularly on the particulars of the texts rather than the general sentiment.

          3. R C Dean

            I take them seriously, but not literally. I don’t think there was an actual insurance policy that was going to pay out if certain expenses were incurred or events happened. I don’t think there was an actual secret society that had costumes and rituals and shit.

            But I do think there was a group of FBI/DOJ etc. staffers actively working to get Hillary into the White House “by any means necessary”, and I do think they believed that their illegal activities had given them the material to undermine, if not remove, Trump.

  42. The Late P Brooks

    Good grief

    Sex ed in US public schools isn’t regulated by the federal government, and the resulting patchwork of curricula is a de-standardized mess. Nineteen states require sex educators to teach that sex should only happen after marriage. Only 24 states and Washington, DC, mandate that schools teach any kind of sex ed at all. And only one — California — mandates that students receive education in affirmative consent.

    Long muddled self-promoting moan-and-groaner about why everybody in America needs to read her books.

    TW: Vox

    1. leonadasiv

      This is why progressivism is incompatible with any form of freedom. They are constantly worried that someone outside they’re bonds might be doing something different. They have no interest in live and let live.

      1. Winston

        Cosmos have a sad.

      2. R C Dean

        They are constantly worried that someone outside they’re bonds might be doing something different.

        Its worse than that. They are worried someone might actually have the wrong thoughts. They are totalitarians; they don’t stop at telling you what to do, they insist on telling you what to believe, what to think, and who to be.

      3. Akira

        They have a fetish for standardization.

        I managed to convince a “progressive” that the current college system is total shit and needs to die and that the private sector can and will come up with far better systems, and his reply was, “yea, as long as it’s standardized in some way”.

    2. The Elite Elite

      ZOMG! How dare different states be allowed to try different things! Obviously there should be a single federal standard for all!

    3. thom

      Unwilling to give Vox a page view. Are they actually presenting this as a problem? Strangely, it seems like most lefties I know would favor local control over something like this…

  43. RE: The pseudo-Geisha charity event.

    Since feminist have changed gears and now see women not as self-sufficient, competent individuals, but as pitiful, shrinking violets, I guess demonizing and criminalizing male libido is their only play. There are several societies, primarily in the Middle East, that take a similar approach to male/female relations. All that pent up, repressed sexual energy has to go somewhere. Let’s hope the sexbots come sooner rather than later or sales for pipe bomb materials will probably start going up.

  44. Chipwooder

    Here’s a fun local story – people freaking out about a house in their neighborhood being rented out on Airbnb. Drink deep from the well of mindless hysteria:

    “It’s just been a nightmare for us on this street in a sense that our quiet peaceful community is now filled with stranger,” Valerie Acosta said. “We never know who is going to staying across the street.”…..

    “She’s been renting out the house to upwards of 16 people a night, she also used it as a filming venue to commercials. At least two commercials have been filmed there, as well as allowed the renters to have a wedding and wedding rehearsal there,” said Acosta…..

    “To hear her say we haven’t been impacted was surprising,” said Acosta. “She is not willing and has never felt the impact of any of the renters and we have.”….

    Acosta says since the property was listed as a short-term rental, half of her neighbors in her once quiet cul-de-sac have moved.

    “Four families have sold their homes and moved out of Henrico County because they have been so concerned about this,” said Acosta. The Henrico woman said crime has climbed in the last two years as well and they have had to install security cameras around their property…..

    “It’s been horrible, the number of cars broken into in our neighborhood has increased, someone attempted to break into our back door. A house a few doors over was broken into, money was stolen, the master bedroom, the mattress was set on fire. We didn’t have those things happening prior to this starting up on our street,” said Acosta.

    While there was no evidence that any criminal activity was the result of the Airbnb rental, Acosta said she wanted to get back to feeling at home.

    I’m gonna have to call my mom and rag on her for it, Coventry is the subdivision right across from hers.

    1. Pope Jimbo

      “I don’t believe we all have the right to do whatever we want in our neighborhoods,” responded Acosta. “As citizens we have to be mindful and respectful of our neighborhood and our community. People don’t have the right in Henrico to run a hotel or wedding venue in a residential community.”

      I wonder how much money Valerie Acosta pays toward her neighbor’s mortgage? None? Well then she can fuck off about what happens over there.

      The picture of Acosta makes me laugh because she looks a lot like the crazy neighbor I have that was convinced that any strange car on our street was a child abductor looking to steal her daughters. She’d always ask us if we saw that “strange green car” and would sometimes call the cops if they drove through a second time. (We live on a back road in one of those subdivisions that have a zillion curvy roads. Before GPS we’d get stray cars looking for a short cut through our neighborhood).

      1. Chipwooder

        My mother-in-law is that person. She thinks about half of the population is child molestors.

        1. You can say that again.

      2. commodious spittoon

        Mom is constantly, bitterly embattled with her neighbors. Sometimes she has a point, like the guy who used his yard as an overflow lot for his auto body shop, but more often she’s just stirring shit, like going after the neighbor who put up a large house on the next street over, because it “ruined” the treeline for her neighbor. That latter shit definitely dilutes any legitimate gripes she has.

        1. commodious spittoon

          Also, I bet 90% of her issues would be resolved if she’d arrange to put up a wood fence in lieu of the chain link she’s mostly bordered by. Sure, that limits her sight lines somewhat, but at least she’d not be assailed by whatever her neighbors happen to be doing at any given moment.

    2. Tundra

      I don’t believe we all have the right to do whatever we want in our neighborhoods,” responded Acosta. “As citizens we have to be mindful and respectful of our neighborhood and our community. People don’t have the right in Henrico to run a hotel or wedding venue in a residential community.

      Wow.

      1. Chipwooder

        Welcome to the West End of Henrico, busybody capital of the world.

      2. Derpetologist

        Most disputes are not about threats to life or property; they are about hurt feelings.

        It took me a long time to realize that.

        Suppose instead of running an air b n b, the guy was just really popular and holding parties all the time. I suspect similar complaints would be made even though no rules were broken.

        Everyone wants to be king, but it’s impossible.

        1. commodious spittoon

          Definitely a Sayre’s Law equivalent for disputes between neighbors.

    3. R C Dean

      She is not willing and has never felt the impact of any of the renters

      At least in that excerpt, she never says what the impact on her actually has been.

      our quiet peaceful community is now filled with stranger . . . half of her neighbors in her once quiet cul-de-sac have moved

      Sounds like most of the stranger aren’t staying at the AirBnB.

      Four families have sold their homes and moved out of Henrico County

      If you move out of the County, you’re probably moving for reasons other than getting away from one neighbor.

      1. invisible finger

        OMG! STRANGERS!

        This woman want to live where there is no such thing as a stranger.

        Christ, what an asshole.

    4. Number.6

      North of the James problems that Midlothianites can laugh about.

    5. “Acosta said she wanted to get back to feeling at home.”

      Buy land, dipshit.

  45. Winston

    LBJ to Greek Ambassador

    https://en.m.wikiquote.org/wiki/Lyndon_B._Johnson

    Fuck your parliament and your constitution. America is an elephant. Cyprus is a flea. Greece is a flea. If these two fleas continue itching the elephant, they may just get whacked good …We pay a lot of good American dollars to the Greeks, Mr. Ambassador. If your Prime Minister gives me talk about democracy, parliament and constitution, he, his parliament and his constitution may not last long…

    Why can’t we have nice clean tactful tolerant guys like LBJ anymore?

    1. Chipwooder

      Did he show the ambassador Jumbo to get the point across?

      1. WTF

        Or deliver the threat while sitting on the crapper?

    2. Trump needs to hire a staffer to comb through the records of past presidents and find the most absurd things they’ve said. And then he needs to tweet a word or two and tweet them in a serious manner. Then when people flip out, he needs to apologize for tweeting it…tweeting it without giving credit to the president who used it first. And he needs to link to the public record where they said it for good measure.

      The. Left. Would. Blow. A. Fucking. Gasket.

      1. Grumbletarian

        This suggests that they still have unblown gaskets.

      2. WTF

        That would be great.
        “I never trust a man till I have his pecker in my pocket.”
        “I’ll have them niggers voting for our party for the next 200 years”
        Etc. etc.

      3. Derpetologist

        Here’s LBJ saying nigger on tape:

        https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r1rIDmDWSms

        I’m sure any minute now, the left will be demanding that he be unpersoned.

        1. invisible finger

          If that means we get rid of every program LBJ ever concocted that eventually came to be, I might get on board with it.

    3. invisible finger

      “If LBJ were alive today, he’d be totally woke. Because he was a Democrat.”

    4. whiz

      Here’s an interesting comment from him regarding the 1965 Immigration Bill:

      This bill says simply that from this day forth those wishing to immigrate to America shall be admitted on the basis of their skills and their close relationship to those already here. This is a simple test, and it is a fair test. Those who can contribute most to this country; to its growth, to its strength, to its spirit; will be the first that are admitted to this land. The fairness of this standard is so self-evident that we may well wonder that it has not always been applied. Yet the fact is that for over four decades the immigration policy of the United States has been twisted and has been distorted by the harsh injustice of the national origins quota system. Under that system the ability of new immigrants to come to America depended upon the country of their birth.

      Maybe Trump should be more like LBJ than just the use of bad language.

  46. straffinrun

    EL CHAPO
    I WON’T KILL MY JURORS …I Promise

    El Chapo says he’ll be gentle as a lamb with jurors in his criminal case, so it’s totally unnecessary to sequester the panel.

    1. Stinky Wizzleteats

      What a sweet guy.

  47. wdalasio

    Yeah, those Senators are so darned frustrated with the FBI that they’re renewing FISA authorization. At a certain point, shit or get off the pot. You don’t get to tell the rest of us how angry you are about their misdeeds while giving in to every request they dream up.

    1. Just Say’n

      ^ This.

      The hypocrisy here is so breathtaking. You got people who are totes police reform suddenly defending the FBI as beyond reproach. And then you get people like Anne Coulter who think the police are always right whenever they kill a guy in the streets suddenly concerned about FBI abuse.

      All the while, senators from both sides of the aisle are pretending like they didn’t just vote to increase the surveillance power of an FBI and a president that they have screamed are literally abusing their authority.

      1. Pope Jimbo

        That is why I loved that tweet from Greenwald calling out Flake for his hypocrisy.

        If you think DJT is Hitler, why vote to give him more power?

        1. Just Say’n

          No, you see Flake is beyond reproach. He’s the most libertarian-y Senator ever, because he said mean things about Trump. Flake is such a god damn clown. He compares Trump to Stalin in a Senate floor speech and then turns around and grants him more power.

          Regardless of his other politics, Greenwald is a good egg

          1. Winston

            According to Welch Flake is a decent guy who is principled yet likes to compromise. Which makes no sense.

            And Greenwald is one of those lefties that actually take the whole antiwar anti-surveillance state stuff seriously as opposed to for partisan political purposes.

          2. Just Say’n

            I’ll take a anti-war, anti-surveillance Leftist over a mild-mannered conservative authoritarian any day of the week

          3. Winston

            So all five of them?

          4. Winston

            I mean antiwar anti-surveillance leftists.

          5. commodious spittoon

            Trump maligns journalists and networks on Twitter: Democracy Dies in Dorkness.

            Obama surveilled and threatened journalists who published leaked information, while running one of the most opaque administrations: *crickets*

      2. wdalasio

        All the while, senators from both sides of the aisle are pretending like they didn’t just vote to increase the surveillance power of an FBI and a president that they have screamed are literally abusing their authority.

        The pathetic thing is that I suspect they genuinely are upset about the FBI’s stonewalling.

  48. The Late P Brooks

    people freaking out about a house in their neighborhood being rented out on Airbnb. Drink deep from the well of mindless hysteria:

    Every time I see one of these bullshit stories, I hope these people get a new owner-occupant next door neighbor who’s a 24-7-365 nuisance.

    1. Pope Jimbo

      That would mean that the neighborhood would have two 24-7-365 nuisances living there. Do they really deserve that?

  49. Derpetologist

    State Department: Four Americans killed in Kabul attack

    ***
    Four Americans were among those killed in an attack at a hotel in Afghanistan last week, the U.S. State Department said Wednesday.

    Two other Americans were injured in the attack at the Intercontinental Hotel in Kabul on Saturday that left a total of 22 people dead, including 14 foreigners.

    About 160 people were rescued after the Afghan army fought to gain control of the building at the end of the more than 12-hour siege.

    Glenn Selig, the president and CEO of Florida-based public relations agency Selig Multimedia, was among the Americans killed in the attack.

    Six men wearing uniforms of the Afghan army and armed with rocket-propelled grenades and other weapons took hotel guests hostage at the often-targeted hotel.
    ***

    Is there a pressing reason why US civilians must go to places like Afghanistan? Wouldn’t it be better to wait for the war to end?

    1. WTF

      You assume the war is ever going to end.

      1. Hrm… we are talking about Afghanistan. They’re not liable to change unless we have a total population replacement.

      2. Just Say’n

        As if it was ever designed to end. And now we are quietly sneaking into another quagmire in Syria.

  50. Just Say’n

    https://pbs.twimg.com/media/DURy-MJX4AAQJCy.jpg:large

    Greatest exchange on Twitter ever. To summarize:

    Rich American Liberal: Venezuela is doing pretty good, actually. I learned that from my post-modernist sociology professor. So, science.

    Guy in Venezuela: Actually, Venezuela is pretty terrible right now. You want to switch places?

    Rich American Liberal: Whatever. You don’t know what you’re talking about

    Guy in Venezuela: I fucking live here

    1. SugarFree

      In the before times, joe did that with rana, who actually, you know, lived in Venezuela. He spluttered for a while and then called her a liar. She had been on the board for months talking about living there.

      It was a damn fine time.

      1. Just Say’n

        Anyone who questions the Bolivar Revolution is a liar. So it has been decreed by people who live comfortably hundreds of miles north of Caracas.

        1. SugarFree

          In the months since November 2016, I wonder how joe’s TRUST DEMOCRACY shibboleth is working out for him.

          1. Just Say’n

            About as well as all neoconservative ideas turn out

          2. Winston

            Electoral college, racism and Russia denied the people’s will?

        2. Rufus the Monocled

          ‘Castro did soooo much for the revolution!’

          ‘Yeh but Cooba is a shithole!’

          ‘But he did soooo much!’

          1. Akira

            “Communist countries were years ahead of us on women’s rights!”
            Yep, men and women went to the same gulags and got the same caliber of bullet to the back of the head!

            “Communist countries were great promoters of arts and culture!”
            … With prompt disappearances of artists whose art seemed to have “bourgoise” or Western influences.

            “Communist countries had very high literacy rates!”
            Wonderful – your citizens were able to read all kinds of state-approved literature!

    2. Atanarjuat

      “and accomplishments I can’t remember”

    3. invisible finger

      The funny thing is the Rich American Liberal would have the same conversation 20 years ago with an American living in the Robert Taylor Homes, and they would both endorse the same candidate.

      1. Raston Bot

        murdered by hanging? i’m assuming it was torture to get the combo to the safe.

      2. Don’t read the comments.

  51. Pope Jimbo

    To be fair, our crazy lady actually helped catch some burglars once. A house was broken into a block over and she heard about it. She called the cops with the description of a car she had spotted that didn’t belong in the neighborhood. The cops saw the car at a nearby hotel and when they walked over to it, there was a lot of loot in the back seat, so the cops staked it out and caught the idiots when they got in.

    Crazy Lady was so proud of herself.

    1. Pope Jimbo

      Oops, this was supposed to be a reply to Chip above about his MIL.

  52. The Late P Brooks

    Glenn Selig, the president and CEO of Florida-based public relations agency Selig Multimedia, was among the Americans killed in the attack.

    Working for the Afghanistan Bureau of Tourism, I hope.

  53. Derpetologist

    Indonesia’s special forces drink snake blood to impress Mattis

    ***
    Indonesia’s special forces showed off their skills — including drinking blood from decapitated snakes and breaking flaming bricks — for U.S. Defense Secretary James Mattis during his visit to Jakarta on Wednesday.

    The demonstration came as Mattis seeks to expand military and counterterrorism cooperation with Indonesia.

    The U.S. Defense chief looked on as camouflaged men wearing war paint took part in elaborate and at-times dangerous feats of strength and skill. Some of the soldiers decapitated snakes, including at least one king cobra, and drank their blood. One man bit the head off one of the snakes.

    Others broke stacks of flaming bricks, while even a group of specially trained German Shepherd dogs got in on the action, descending from helicopters in a hostage rescue drill.

    One blindfolded commando finely sliced a cucumber held in the mouth of another soldier, while others rolled in broken glass, laid on a bed of nails and leapt through fire.

    One man appeared to be injured during a demonstration in which he was shot as he held a red balloon above his head for a comrade to shoot with a pellet gun.

    Mattis appeared entertained by the spectacle.
    ***

    On second thought, let’s not go to Camelot Indonesia. Tis a silly place.

    1. Gustave Lytton

      One man appeared to be injured during a demonstration in which he was shot as he held a red balloon above his head for a comrade to shoot with a pellet gun.

      Less drinking, more basic riflemanship would be my suggestion.

    2. The Last American Hero

      Is this the part where Indy pulls out his gun and just shoots the swordsman?

    3. Number.6

      Well, we know who to call next time there’s a hostage situation in a glass-recycling plant.

      Not sure what utility there is parachuting highly-trained dogs (or, as many Indonesians call them ‘food’) into an LZ unless you intend to set them to be shot at by over-zealous civilian police officers.

  54. A Fuggin White Male

    We found out the sex of baby number 3 today…. it’s another girl.

    Three girls for me.

    Pro… it is exponentially easier to get an athletic scholarship as a girl.

    Con… three weddings to pay for.

    1. Average wedding cost: $25,576

      Why you could get a Porsche instead. Remember Justice of the Peace.

    2. Many more boyfriends to threaten.

      1. Atanarjuat

        Warning: ^this will turn them into unrepentant whores.

      2. A Fuggin White Male

        On that note, I cannot wait until my girls are old enough to go shooting with me.

      3. One of the best things about having daughters. Wilt ’em in the living room and they stay wilted all night.

    3. Derpetologist

      The nice thing about boys is they can’t get pregnant. The nice thing about girls is you probably won’t have to bail them out of jail.

    4. If they’re all lesbians maybe you can split the wedding costs?

  55. Chipwooder

    Rhodes twice reassures us that Clinton will win. “I’m sure,” he says with a smirk on a trip to Southeast Asia. Asked later whether a Trump administration might endanger his accomplishments, he says, “I’ve never really considered that he has any opportunity to win the election.” So what does the speechwriter and former aspiring novelist have to say when Trump does in fact win? “I mean, uh, I can’t even [long pause] I can’t, I ca— [long pause] I mean I, I can’t, I can’t, I can’t put it into words. I don’t know what the words are.”
    <a href="Rhodes twice reassures us that Clinton will win. “I’m sure,” he says with a smirk on a trip to Southeast Asia. Asked later whether a Trump administration might endanger his accomplishments, he says, “I’ve never really considered that he has any opportunity to win the election.” So what does the speechwriter and former aspiring novelist have to say when Trump does in fact win? “I mean, uh, I can’t even [long pause] I can’t, I ca— [long pause] I mean I, I can’t, I can’t, I can’t put it into words. I don’t know what the words are.”

    Nelson Muntz “ha-ha” at Ben Rhodes

    1. Chipwooder

      and a ha-ha at me for making a complete mess of that

        1. Chipwooder

          A-Ha Unplugged is something I never dreamed I’d be lucky enough to experience.

          1. I’m a huge a-ha fan. There I said it. Own all of their albums except for the Unplugged triple-LP. They’ve been making great music for many years; favorite of mine in Analogue.

            Celice

        2. Bob Boberson

          The version thatmakes me yuk-yuk no matter how many times I watch it:

          https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8HE9OQ4FnkQ

          1. Count Potato

            LOL

          2. Bob Boberson
          3. Count Potato

            That is hilarious.

    2. Gilmore

      This entire piece is an excellent summary of things i said for 8 years regarding the Obama foreign policy team

      their main skill was in creating the *appearance* of success, with none of the substance. which is why a young fiction-writer was in charge.

      they express shock and dismay and disappointment when they learn that the deals they make (entirely without any enforcement mechanisms or approval by congress) are either ignored/broken by participants, or simply tossed out by the next president.

      1. R C Dean

        I think its consistent with Obama only ever wanting to “be” President, with all the ego strokes, perks, privileges, etc. that brings, and never having much interest in doing the President’s job. He was a celebrity, not an executive or administrator. He always preferred the press release to actual legislation or treaty.

        Which is why we are seeing his legacy is tissue-thin and easily discarded.

        1. Chipwooder

          He wanted to be head of state, not head of government.

        2. Gilmore

          He was a celebrity, not an executive or administrator

          You’re right, but i also think you miss that many good executives are simply “figureheads” or “salespeople” . Obama’s strength was selling. He was smart to emphasize that role.

          His flaw was that he was ALSO a micromanager who thought he was smarter than all his subordinates. Normally, the good ‘sales’ guy surrounds himself with people who can deliver good product. Obama didn’t trust ANYONE more than himself, and refused to let anyone direct policy other than him+Rhodes, neither of whom knew fuck-all about the subjects they were dealing with.

          the piece on Rhodes in the NYT went into detail on this:

          Part of what accounts for Rhodes’s influence is his “mind meld” with the president. Nearly everyone I spoke to about Rhodes used the phrase “mind meld” verbatim, some with casual assurance and others in the hushed tones that are usually reserved for special insights. He doesn’t think for the president, but he knows what the president is thinking, which is a source of tremendous power. One day, when Rhodes and I were sitting in his boiler-room office, he confessed, with a touch of bafflement, “I don’t know anymore where I begin and Obama ends.”… Rhodes quickly does the political math on the breaking Iran story. “Now they’ll show scary pictures of people praying to the supreme leader,” he predicts, looking at the screen. Three beats more, and his brain has spun a story line to stanch the bleeding.

          they were both the same type of person: people who are great at “explaining” shit, but don’t have a clue how things actually work. They have great post-facto analytical skills, and zero operational comprehension. AND total contempt for operational people.

          so Obama both ‘created’ the crap, and then expertly flogged it as the best thing ever. No one ever told him how bad his diplomatic projects were because he never let anyone smarter than Susan Rice (herself a 20+ career failure in the state dept) anywhere near himself.

          1. R C Dean

            many good executives are simply “figureheads” or “salespeople” .

            I get what you mean, but to me, those are people who have executive titles but don’t really function as executives.

            His flaw was that he was ALSO a micromanager who thought he was smarter than all his subordinates.

            Excellent point. To me, the one infallible sign of a good leader is that they surround themselves with the strongest people they can, and they listen to them. Obama was fundamentally insecure, I believe. His colossal vanity carried with it the niggling suspicion that maybe he wasn’t all that, so he protected his ego by surrounding himself with second-raters. Good leaders are secure enough in themselves to surround themselves with first-raters; good leaders aren’t worried that they will look bad in comparison.

      2. invisible finger

        Empty Suit. Empty Presidency.

  56. Spending the week in Silicon Valley has certainly been instructive. I am forced to wonder how much longer these tech giants stick around. In spite of the terminal wokeness of their employees, the execs still have to make decisions for the good of their bottom line. With insane people protesting and picketing everything, outrageous, artificially inflated housing prices preventing them from finding entry level talent and the most business a hostile environment in the US, I’d think they’re already quietly looking at other options.

    1. trshmnstr

      The execs are leading the wokeness. I work for one of those SV giants, and in my interactions with the higher ups, they just don’t see it. They’re getting paid well enough to miss the economic issues, and they typically sympathize with the lunatics, even if they’re not fully on board with each and every one of them. Heck, it took a shit ton of prodding to get rid of the (unwritten) SV-only requirement for my boss’ boss’ level.

  57. The Late P Brooks

    That would mean that the neighborhood would have two 24-7-365 nuisances living there. Do they really deserve that?

    Deserve’s got nothin’ to do with it.

  58. Derpetologist

    Silence of the Fish

    https://gfycat.com/InfamousAmusingCatbird

    Snake wears fish head like a mask.

  59. The Late P Brooks

    Rhodes twice reassures us that Clinton will win. “I’m sure,” he says with a smirk on a trip to Southeast Asia.

    It’s just like putting it all on “22” on the roulette wheel at Rick’s Cafe Americain.

  60. Derpetologist

    here we go again

    ***
    A California lawmaker introduced legislation Wednesday that aims to protect Californians from gun suicides, the San Francisco Chronicle reported.

    Assemblyman Rob Bonta, D-Oakland, introduced AB1927, in order to bar people from buying a gun if they are struggling with suicidal thoughts or fear they are a danger to themselves.

    According to Bonta, Californians who commit suicide after purchasing a gun most often do so within a week of purchase.

    Under the proposed bill, individuals struggling with suicidal thoughts can voluntarily submit their name to the state office responsible for background checks.

    The office would then alert licensed arms dealers that the person is prohibited from buying a gun. If the person could prove they were no longer suicidal, they could remove their name from the list, the report said.

    Bonta citited a report from the federal Centers for Disease Control and Prevention which claimed that more than 1,000 people died from gun suicides in California in 2015.

    “We know suicide can be an impulsive decision that most survivors regret,” Bonta said in a statement. “Guns are lethal and, unfortunately, rarely allow for second chances.”

    According to The Chronicle, his bill has found support among gun-control advocates.
    ***

    http://www.foxnews.com/us/2018/01/25/new-california-bill-aims-to-protect-citizens-from-gun-suicides.html

    1. Chipwooder

      They will also be forbidden from possessing ropes, over the counter medications, gas appliances, vehicles, sharp objects, bathtubs, plastic bags. They also will not be allowed to go to higher floors of buildings or use bridges for any reason.

      1. Tundra

        A pathologist I know once told me that helium is the way to go. Clean, neat and painless.

        Don’t tell California.

        1. Nitrogen will do the same job the same way – and you won’t go out with your last words squeaking like a chipmunk.

          1. Pope Jimbo

            Uffda.

            So your choice is to squeak through your famous last words or to giggle through them?

            Doesn’t seem all that dignified. Of course, I plan on being shot by a jealous husband as I am leaping out the window, so I don’t have anything too pithy lined up.

          2. “Why do you live on the fifth floor?” – Jimbo’s Last Words

          3. Tundra

            “Better wear a rubber, dude!”

      2. Derpetologist

        Last year, there were 30k deaths from opioid overdoses vs about 18k gun suicides. Maybe we should ban opioids.

        Yeah, that’s the ticket.

        interesting fact: worldwide, there are about 2 suicides for every homicide. I’m not sure how the figure changes if you count war deaths.

    2. Gustave Lytton

      And coming soon!– ability to submit your own name anonymously, right?

    3. Pope Jimbo

      Why not just mandate a 10ft barrel on all firearms. That should stop suicides.

      How hard was that?

      1. Two simple solutions – A: a string and a vertical post; B: a hacksaw.

        1. Pope Jimbo

          OK, add strings, posts and hacksaws to the prohibited list.

          And if you think that plan has flaws, don’t worry. It will only take a few more laws to fix your new criticisms.

    4. DOOMco

      how can you prove you’re not suicidal? you haven’t committed suicide?

    5. wdalasio

      Under the proposed bill, individuals struggling with suicidal thoughts can voluntarily submit their name to the state office responsible for background checks.

      For the love of God, don’t pass this bill. Anyone dumb enough to submit their name voluntarily is exactly the sort of person the human gene pool would benefit from eliminating.

  61. Count Potato

    “Tess Holliday Poses Nude for Women’s Equality: ‘Women Deserve Respect’

    Tess Holliday is posing nude — for a great cause.

    The model, 32, shared an unretouched photo of herself, naked, to advocate for women’s equality. Her husband Nick took the photo and added it to his Instagram account on Saturday, which Tess then reposted.

    “Women deserve respect, whether they are completely naked or covered head to toe,” Nick wrote.”

    people.com/bodies/tess-holliday-poses-nude-womens-equality/

    TW: “for there is no folly of the beast of the earth which is not infinitely outdone by the madness of men ”

    1. Respect is earned.

      Deserve has got nothing to do with it.

    2. Gilmore

      Yesterday i made chili to advocate for women’s equality.

      1. Count Potato

        Was it with a helicopter?

    3. wdalasio

      Dear God I did not need to see that.

      Advocating for equality? I’d say she’s advocating for equality to about 350 pounds.

  62. Derpetologist

    Man carries full-size cross to every country and through about 40 war zones
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=anIO0b6TIkQ

    wiki

    ***
    Early life and career[edit]
    Blessitt was born in Greenville, Mississippi,[2] and grew up in northeast Louisiana, where his father managed a large cotton farm. At the age of 7 he accepted Christ at a revival meeting.[3] In the late 1960s Blessitt began evangelizing to the youth of Hollywood, California. There he became known as the “Minister of Sunset Strip.” Blessitt preached to hippies, Hells Angels, runaways, drug addicts, teen prostitutes, flower children, would-be actors, and rock stars. In March 1968, he opened a coffee house called His Place in a rented building next door to a topless go-go club. It was there that he first made a big cross to hang on the wall of the building on the inside. He started carrying the cross on Sunset Strip from time to time.

    His first marriage was to Sherry Anne Simmons, whom he married within three weeks of dating.[4] Together they had six children: Gina, Joel, Joy, Joshua, Joseph and Jerusalem.[3] All his sons are named Arthur, and go by their middle names.

    In 1990 he married Denise. They have adopted one child, Sophia.[citation needed] As of the late 2000s, he lives in Denver, Colorado.

    Cross walk[edit]
    Arthur made the cross in 1968 to hang on the wall of ‘His Place’ on Sunset Strip, Hollywood. He made short cross-walks there. Then on Christmas morning in 1969, Blessitt began his journey with the cross, walking from Los Angeles to Washington, D.C. In August 1971, Blessitt made his first overseas cross-walk beginning in Northern Ireland.

    He has carried the cross to all parts of the world including war-torn countries such as Lebanon and parts of Africa to pray for peace. During the Cold War, Blessitt carried his cross into the Soviet Union, through Russia, the Baltic States, Ukraine and other countries. He has carried the cross through such places as Iraq, North Korea, Iran, Afghanistan, Somalia, Sudan, China, South Africa, Lebanon, India, Antarctica, Palestine, Israel, Cuba, Libya, Northern and Southern Yemen, Vietnam and Mongolia.

    During his walk around the world, Blessitt has held audience with numerous world and religious leaders including, George W. Bush, Billy Graham, Pope John Paul II, Yasser Arafat and Muammar al-Gaddafi and was arrested 24 times.

    On part of the cross-walk through Beirut, Blessitt chose to bring his son Joshua.[5]

    He completed every nation and major island group on June 7, 2008 but is still walking on.
    ***

    1. Pope Jimbo

      Please tell me that this guy is being sponsored by CrossFit.

      1. robc

        Booooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

      2. commodious spittoon

        literal lol

      3. Private Chipperbot
    2. robc

      Is Antarctica war torn?

      1. Derpetologist

        In the video, there is a clip of him evangelizing to penguins.

        I larfed.

        1. Pope Jimbo

          Don’t laugh. Antarctica has a real black and white on black and white violence problem.

          1. You know how penguins check the water for seals?

            They kick one of their weaker fellows in.

  63. Pope Jimbo

    U of MN dares to take free shit away!

    On Monday, the dean of education notified families that the U’s Child Development Center, which opened in 1974, will close in the summer of 2019. Almost immediately, parents — in this case, professors, staff and graduate students — formed a Facebook group, UMCDC Parents Organizing, to voice their outrage and plot a strategy to overturn the decision.

    The daycare was subsidized to the tune of $500K by the College of Education and Human Development each year to handle 140 kids. That is $300/mo.

    The dean makes some pretty good sense when she says running a daycare isn’t really part of her colleges mission and that $500K could be used better educating students.

    No mention is made as how much the parents pay to put their kids into the daycare. My guess is that it will be nothing.

    Lots of great quotes in the story from the leeches about how this is unconscionable. How can they take their free shit away?

    1. invisible finger

      Based on the SJW snowflakes, I think daycare IS the college’s primary mission.

  64. The Late P Brooks

    Mind readers

    In some ways, Trump’s decision to become the first American president to visit Davos since Bill Clinton did in 2000 was a predictable outcome for a man who, for decades, has sought acceptance by the rarified world of the ultra-rich. Now, he arrives at the annual party more powerful than them, eager to take a victory lap around those who excluded him for years.

    Yet for the third time, it’s a foreign trip that begins under the shadow of developments in the Russia investigation and special counsel Robert Mueller. Trump left for Saudi Arabia in May just as Mueller was appointed, departed for Asia in November as the first criminal charges in the probe were filed, and leaves this week amid new revelations of interviews with his attorney general and the FBI director he fired.

    Trump arrived in Switzerland on Thursday morning and plans to spend only one night. His brief appearance at the Davos forum has already caused agitation and eye-rolling among some of the gathering’s regular attendees, who wonder whether he’ll lambast or even shame them when he takes the stage on Friday morning. Trump’s advisers say he’ll link his governing agenda to the record markets and low unemployment currently fueling American growth.

    These people are so obsessed by Trump, and so fixated on projecting their own insecurity onto his actions. It used to be amusing, now it’s just a colossal bore.

    1. Winston

      Trump is a Republican and one they especially hate so they will keep this up until the Dems are in the White House again.

    2. wdalasio

      and leaves this week amid new revelations of interviews with his attorney general and the FBI director he fired.

      The news this week regarding the Russia investigation is mostly that the FBI was working as a wholly owned subsidiary of the Democratic party to fix the election for Clinton. I don’t think this road leads where they think it does.

    3. R C Dean

      a predictable outcome for a man who, for decades, has sought acceptance by the rarified world of the ultra-rich

      Not at all like the Clintons.

      I love the way Trump’s need for acceptance by the ultra-rich is stated as a fact, when as far as I know he never went to Davos during all those decades.

  65. The Late P Brooks

    The dean makes some pretty good sense when she says running a daycare isn’t really part of her colleges mission and that $500K could be used better educating students.

    I should be pleasantly surprised, but I assume they’ll divert that money to building more climbing walls and other life enhancing non-academic amenities. Maybe some additional safe spaces.

    1. Pope Jimbo

      The letter from Jean Quam, dean of the College of Education and Human Development, said the center would close in 18 months to make room to expand another early childhood program, called the Shirley Moore Laboratory School, which is used for research and training. Unlike the day-care center, the lab school is not full time and operates only nine months a year.

      So it sounds like there may be a daycare option for 9 mo/year if the parents are willing to let their kids be lab rats. I’d be interested in seeing how many electrical shocks you could give the kids before the parents decided that it wasn’t worth the free daycare.

  66. Just Say’n

    http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/local/breaking/ct-met-no-teacher-learning-20171212-story.html

    Call me crazy, but I don’t buy this garbage. Students pick their own educational pursuits and learn on their own time. No student will receive an ‘F’.

    Anyone who is familiar with the Chicago area and its surrounding suburbs will recognize that all the schools implementing this program are poor performing and usually in lower-income areas (with the exception of Ridgwood High School in Norridge). Seems like this is just a way for administrators to pretend as if they are producing competent students without any effort. Looks like its more to the benefit of bureaucrats over students.

    Vouchers would be a better alternative, but the unions won’t allow that. So instead let’s just push kids through the system and teach them nothing.

    1. Urthona

      All you need to do to not get an F at an urban public school is just even moderately try. Ask anyone who has ever taught at one.

    2. invisible finger

      ” “How do you want to learn today?” ”

      At home, douchebag.

    3. invisible finger

      Huntley is as bad as Elgin now?

  67. Count Potato

    “UConn Offers Counseling for Students Upset at ‘Even the Thought of’ a Ben Shapiro Speech

    Upon learning that conservative speaker Ben Shapiro had been invited to campus, the University of Connecticut immediately offered its student body counseling services.

    “We understand that even the thought of an individual coming to campus with the views that Mr. Shapiro expresses can be concerning and even hurtful and that’s why we wanted to make you aware as soon as we were informed,” stated a campus-wide email from associate vice president and chief diversity officer Joelle Murchison, according to an article in Shapiro’s Daily Wire.

    According to the email, there hasn’t even been a “date, location or time” confirmed for the speech — but apparently the school still believed that it was necessary to start offering time for counseling now.

    I like to think of myself as a sensitive person, but this is something that I simply cannot wrap my head around. There are a ton of people I can’t stand who are out there giving speeches every single day, and yet “the thought” of that has had absolutely zero impact on my mental health. It’s not “hurtful.” It doesn’t affect me. I have a life. I think it’s fine.

    What’s interesting to me about this particular story is that it wasn’t even a group of students who ran to ring that “triggered” bell. (Although I’m sure that would have happened eventually.) This time, it was the school sending out a preemptive email, basically telling students that they should be upset. Talk of oversensitivity on college campuses is so often centered on the students-are-snowflakes narrative that people don’t realize how often it’s the school itself that’s prompting these sorts of things.”

    http://www.nationalreview.com/article/455745/ben-shapiro-speech-uconn-university-connecticut-offers-counseling-students

  68. Ken Shultz

    President Donald Trump for the first time said publicly that he supported a pathway to citizenship for young, undocumented immigrants brought to the country by their parents, moving a step closer to bipartisan group seeking a way around an immigration-policy impasse but taking a position at odds with some conservatives.

    “We’re going to morph into it—it’s going to happen,” Mr. Trump told reporters at the White House. “It’s a nice thing to have the incentive after a period of years, being able to become a citizen.”

    Mr. Trump cited a time frame of 10 to 12 years for the young immigrants, dubbed Dreamers, to become citizens.

    —-Wall Street Journal

    https://www.wsj.com/articles/senators-resume-immigration-negotiations-1516834456

    Regardless of whether you support amnesty for so called “dreamers”, I’m not sure people really understand what’s being changed here.

    Anti-immigration folk (I’m not one) have long complained about “anchor babies” and argued against birthright citizenship on that basis. I don’t suppose it should be surprising that anti-immigration lobby got something wrong, but dreamers legislation is what the end of birthright citizenship looks like.

    I’m not saying that you won’t be an American citizen if you’re born in this country anymore, but they used to be able to deport people–because they weren’t born here.

    In other words, birthright citizenship isn’t an expansion of who is eligible for citizenship. It’s restrictive. Millions more people will be eligible to become U.S. citizens once they take away the ability to deport people because they weren’t born here. The anti-immigration lobby is about to be victimized by their own marketing.

    The good news for the immigration lobby is that “anchor babies” won’t be as much of a problem anymore. The bad news is that children won’t need to be born here anymore in order to qualify for citizenship.

    If Trump trades away the restrictive aspect of birthright citizenship for anything less than a secure border (rather than just funding for a wall), then the anti-immigration lobby is getting screwed over by Trump, whether they realize it or not.

    1. R C Dean

      Currently, birthright citizenship is one path to citizenship. There have always been others. Giving Dreamers a path to citizenship is just adding one more to the list of other ways to become a citizen. I don’t like it, but I don’t see how it fundamentally undermines birthright citizenship as a restriction on citizenship, because birthright has never been a restriction on the other ways to become a citizen.

      The anti-immigration lobby is getting screwed by Trump letting the Dreamers stay in the country at all, much less have a path to citizenship. It is an amnesty for a limited class of illegals, and we know how that works out. Something to do with getting more of what you reward.

      1. Ken Shultz

        Birthright was never the only path to citizenship, but I just don’t think this plays out the way the anti-immigration lobby thinks.

        If they thought “anchor babies” were a problem before, how will it be once the babies don’t even need to be born here?

        There’s no need to sneak across the border when you’re pregnant to have an American baby. You can bring however many children you want across the border at any time, and they all become eligible for citizenship just by virtue of being here for however long.

        That’s big and new.

        If I were Trump, and I wanted to keep my anti-immigration lobby happy, I’d insist on amnesty for present dreamers only–rather than making it an ongoing policy for future immigrants.

        We’re still talking about the same issues as before. It’s still about birthright citizenship and amnesty. It’s just that those are loaded terms, so they use words like “dreamers”.

        Meanwhile, the media has people thinking Trump is so anti-immigrant–even the anti-immigrant lobby believes it. I’m not sure average anti-immigrant folks would even realize it if Trump sold them short on immigration.

        1. R C Dean

          You can bring however many children you want across the border at any time, and they all become eligible for citizenship just by virtue of being here for however long.

          Can’t get through the paywall: is he actually offering a path to citizenship for anyone who enters the country illegally as a minor going forward?

          Even if he’s not, in the long run, we are setting up future amnesties for these illegals, just like the last amnesty for illegals set this one up by (a) creating incentives to break the law and (b) normalizing amnesties for those who break the law. If he is setting it up as a permanent, ongoing program, then I think he’s making a fairly serious electoral mistake that will piss off a pretty good chunk of his committed supporters.

          Functionally, there may not be much difference, other than we just amnesty them and give them legal status in batches every so many years.

  69. straffinrun

    The two extremes: The totalitarian extreme – Order but without freedom and the libertarian extreme – freedom but no order. I watched the entire video, but that part stuck out like a sore thumb. The only thing I can think of is that Sacks is using “libertarian” in a way that we wouldn’t use it because otherwise it means he’s ignorant or simply being deceitful.

    1. Order is an emergent property of human behaviour. With or wothout conscious direction, we organize ourselves.

      1. straffinrun

        That’s exactly what I mean. It appears that he’s mistaking libertine and libertarian. He wouldn’t be the first to make that mistake.

    2. Tonio

      Always assume deceitful, which includes wilful ignorance on their part. It’s basically a sticky trap which forces libertarians to explain why something isn’t actually a libertarian position, the classic example of which is teh roadz. They are terrified of any honest discussion of actual libertarian positions.

      1. straffinrun

        He implies that the best way to organize a political system is smack dab in the middle. Makes you want to smash the Overton window. One end of his spectrum is infinitely worse than the other by any historical measure.

  70. The Late P Brooks

    “We understand that even the thought of an individual coming to campus with the views that Mr. Shapiro expresses can be concerning and even hurtful and that’s why we wanted to make you aware as soon as we were informed,” stated a campus-wide email from associate vice president and chief diversity officer Joelle Murchison, according to an article in Shapiro’s Daily Wire.

    That’s fascinating. I’m going to go out on a limb, here, and surmise that there are a lot of UCONN parents (people who directly support the institution financially) who hold views which would make Ben Shapiro look like a goddam Stalinist. What should be done about them? Ban parents?

  71. Pope Jimbo

    You want accountability in govt? You want to see bureaucrats punished for breaking the law?

    Look no further than Wisconsin! Two of the people who were part of the infamous John Doe investigation had their nominations to other cushy govt jobs voted down!!!!!!

    How is that for punishment? Go full rogue and use the govt to hoover up millions of documents from your political opponents as part of a witch hunt and you will not get another govt sinecure.

      1. Rufus the Monocled

        Jesus. Christ.

        What assholes.

        Karma. I want to believe in it.

        1. Rufus the Monocled

          My first submission for the Woodchipper hall of fame:

          Judge Barbara Kluka.

    1. R C Dean

      The balls on those people – two people who were involved in illegal attempts to, not just influence an election, but jail their political enemies, sought positions on an elections board?

      Who the fuck nominated them?

  72. Tundra

    How Believing in Socialism Can Make You Miserable

    Share with your proggies and watch them get angry!

    1. tarran

      I did it as a comment on a facebook post by a commie. The result was hilarious. Everyone shut up except for a Stalinist and a Leninist who both bitched about the FEE being disinformers.

      By the way; if you really want to mess with the hardcore commies, whenever they criticize of free markets, point out how they are actually describing Soviet communism. In my experience, this happens 100% of the time. And they hate it.

    2. straffinrun

      By shifting the blame to others, they relieved themselves of responsibility over their own problems. They wasted their time and energy complaining, wallowing in self-pity, and seeking redress, instead of taking ownership of their lives and fixing up their affairs. As a result, their frustrations only compounded.

      There’s another group of socialists that don’t fit those descriptions in the article: The destroyers. Some people just want to burn shit down and have no moral dilemma when doing so. Their tent is so big for a reason. The perpetually aggrieved and the psychopaths make nice bedfellows, for a while at least.

      1. tarran

        Yep, Stalin was, by all accounts, a very jocular man.

        1. straffinrun

          Some people aren’t worth trying to figure out. Dylan Roof types. You just get rid of them.

    3. Resentment is at work when one so hates somebody for his more favorable circumstances that one is prepared to bear heavy losses if only the hated one might also come to harm

      Sounds familiar

      Would rather the poor be poorer so long as the rich were less rich

      does not repeat, but it rhymes.

    4. commodious spittoon

      The first commenter makes a good point, one I think should be rubbed in the faces of th ignorati for whom socialism is an article of faith:

      I’m not sure that everyone who calls himself a socialist really wants socialism. I think these students want the benefits of a robust, capitalist economy to be given to them for free. They want others to labor for their benefit. They want to be wards of the state, an elite.

      This is why I come down so hard on self-styled campus communists: forget for the moment their benighted commitment to a thoroughly discredited economic theory, what the fuck do they know about capitalism, from which they’ve received every benefit and for which they’ve yet to do any work? The striking thing to me at least isn’t just their envy, but their avarice. They have it backward in thinking that working hard and receiving the fruits of one’s labor is greedy. No, what’s greedy is enjoying the affluence afforded them by capitalism while expecting to pay back nothing but half-baked semiliterate pseudo-intellectual pablum.

      1. Slammer

        Well said.

      2. antisthenes

        If people weren’t prone to covet thy neighbor’s ox, there would be no socialism.

  73. Count Potato

    “Ghosts of the material world in early childhood education: Furniture matters

    This philosophically driven work is intended to trouble the position of the small chair in early childhood settings. It is theoretically driven by an aspect of sociological and cultural theory called hauntology, and by the theories of new feminist materialism. The work of Sara Ahmed influences the direction taken here. An assemblage of personal narratives, memories, works of fiction, history, conversations and media reports, along with the documentation of a performative act, is produced. The methodological approach is intra-active and diffractive. The article argues that the small chair is a contentious and ambiguous artefact, which is taken for granted in early childhood settings, but also problematic when considered from different perspectives – an apparatus that both supports and betrays the body/ies that are in contact with it. Chairs, as objects that furnish human lives, can also haunt those lives and give contradictory messages of power, comfort and suffering. Now and to come, the chair is a trace, a symbol, an instrument of torture and object of desire.”

    http://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1177/1463949117749599

    1. We use small chairs because children are small.

      No one is haunted by the child-sized furnature in their first grade classroom.

    2. R C Dean

      intended to trouble the position of the small chair in early childhood settings

      That’s some quality gibberish, right there.

      1. l0b0t

        So, what you’re saying is you plan to enter a classroom and shove a seated child about?

        1. Count Potato

          He’s saying he’s racist against ghosts and people who talk with furniture.

    3. WTF

      Horrifying that there are people who think that actually makes sense.

    4. Rope Snake

      Hauntology, you say?

      https://youtu.be/OqINetENovg

  74. The Late P Brooks

    Why I hate firemen “first responders”, ch 482

    The Fort Ellis Fire Department is joining the Bozeman Fire Department and the Traffic Safety Committee in calling for a reduced speed limit on Interstate 90 from Bozeman Pass to Belgrade.

    Officials are pushing to reduce the speed from 75 mph to 65 mph to lower the number of accidents and improve first responder safety.

    “We need to fuck over thousands of people just going about their day to day lives because we’re a bunch of trembling weenies who want to run everybody else’s lives. Fuck you, pussy, go work at 7-11 if you’re to askeert to do your fucking job.

    The last time I saw some idiot off in the ditch in Bridger Canyon, there were at least five cop cars strung out along the road with their lights on. Nobody was “endangering” the pussies from the fire department.

    1. Stinky Wizzleteats

      45 would be even safer.

  75. Ayn Random Variation

    The tax cut hit my paycheck today. $50 less in fed taxes. Best thing any president ever did for me. My prog friends who didn’t believe me that their taxes were going down are pissed lol. Progs are never happy

    1. Hmm – I’ll be interested in my next paycheck then.

    2. Rufus the Monocled

      During the Harper years families would get, depending on the number of kids, a child tax credit dumped into their accounts. We’d get something like $150.

      The Liberals killed that, limited TFSA contributions, tried to end income splitting as a tax strategy while claiming to be for a ‘strong middle class’. Meanwhile, they tried to pass a tax proposal that directly benefitted their rich crony friends while hurting SME’s.

      Miserable lying little fucks they are.

    3. My paycheck from yesterday had the exact same witholding as the previous two (which goes into last year).

      I think the Comptroller is slow at implementing the changes.

      1. Ayn Random Variation

        My pay period is through Jan 21, which is pretty current by most standards. Probably why I’m the first one I know to see the cut

  76. l0b0t

    Hey, OMWC, I’ve been groovin’ on this for a couple of days now. A 1949 episode of The Spike Jones Show with guest star Don Ameche doing an opera – This Is Your FBAida. Good stuff.

    https://www.oldtimeradiodownloads.com/variety/the-spike-jones-show/don-ameche-1949-06-25

  77. l0b0t

    I’ve been binge watching SNL for the past few weeks. I find the Randy Quaid tenure particularly underappreciated as I quite like Quaid. This creepy story has me sad.

    1. Raston Bot

      am i the only one who loved Martin Short’s time on SNL? i get that a lot from the extended family.

    2. Raston Bot

      Gulf Coast Furniture Stink Sale
      When Rudy Randolph Jr. (Randy Quaid) found his father dead in the family’s Gulf Coast Furniture Warehouse after four weeks, he knew just what to do, hold a “Stink Sale.” Everything must go!

  78. Raston Bot

    Home Depot paying out $1K bonuses in lieu of tax reform..

    https://www.reuters.com/article/us-home-depot-wages/home-depot-to-pay-staff-bonus-after-tax-overhaul-idUSKBN1FE1VF

    proggies still chalking these up to cynical CEOs supporting their Hitler-in-Chief.

    1. Raston Bot

      ^find/replace “in lieu of”/”because of” or “in wake of”

    2. The Other Kevin

      Saw an FB post the other day about Disney giving their employees bonuses. No mention of tax reform, just that Disney is finally doing what’s right for their employees. I didn’t even bother to start that fight.

    3. Dakotain

      From what I have seen from the few lefties I know on FB they have pretty much quit talking about economics. I have a cousin in law who grew up in Kansas. Big time progressive. He had lots of FB post about how “trickle down economics” did not work in Kansas. He has been pretty quite about the that topic for the last month or so. Now its all about social justice and how unfit Trump is.

      1. Raven Nation

        TBF: Kansas Republicans completely fucked up tax reform.

  79. Dakotain

    “Have we discussed the idiocy on the 5th Column podcast yet?”

    I was meaning to bring up the latest 5th column last week but got busy. I think I am done listening to that podcast. As great as Kmele is, I am getting really tired of Welch, Fisher and especially Moynihan.
    I started grinding my teeth when Welch was talking about immigration and the only downside he would admit was the suppression of wages. Zero mention of the welfare state. I get that you could argue that the moral and practical aspects of open borders trumps the downsides but to just ignore them is pure bullshit.
    The straw the towed the lions back (think I got that right) was Moynihan’s gushing about how dreamy Obama was on Letterman’s Netflix show. He talked about how much he missed having a charming president. There was no comment on how dangerous a charming and well liked politician is to freedom. We have a lot of low information voters in this country who will vote for the guy they would most like to have a beer with. Which means charming sociopaths win elections.

    1. Winston

      Gushing over “charming” politicos isn’t very rational. And already gushing over Obama? After Bill and Jimmy being slobbered over by libertarians I shouldn’t be surprised.

    2. Scruffy Nerfherder

      Wage suppression is an irrelevant issue in any case.

    3. antisthenes

      Even libertarians in general fail in this regard — giving up a little bit of money via the welfare state is not the worst of it; ceding political power to new citizens (if not the immigrants themselves, their children) is a recipe for disaster unless immigrants are assimilated into the broader political culture. The political division between American values and shithole values will make the polarization between elephant and donkey look trivial.

      1. Derpetologist

        Eh, I’m more worried about the nuts who were born and raised here as there are more of them and they can do more damage. Look at all the SJWs. They’re basically communists.

        As long as the US is full of colleges that are Marxist seminaries, I find it hard to worry about the effect of immigrants.

      2. Dakotain

        I am more concerned about how the welfare state allows immigrants to stay isolated. With welfare they are not forced to join the economy to survive. So they don’t join the workforce. Which means they don’t join and contribute to the “melting pot” idea that has been one of this countries strengths. This is why I think guys like Welch are wrong when they make the historical arguments supporting immigrants. Before welfare immigrants had to be part of “social fabric” of the US
        .

      3. R C Dean

        The concerning thing to me is less the impact of mass immigration on national elections (at this point, anyway), and more on its impact on local communities/elections.

        The problems arise when you get communities of unassimilated immigrants. I have lived near such communities in Wisconsin (Hmong) and in Arizona (Mexicans). Oddly, when I lived in West Texas about 90 minutes from the border, we didn’t really have a “barrio” like we do in Tucson – the Tejanos (descendants of Mexicans from back when it was still Mexico) couldn’t stand immigrants from south of the border and not many of them stuck around. Razorfist has a rant about how Phoenix has not benefitted from big chunks of it being Mexicanized that rang pretty true to me.

        These kinds of communities tend to stay pretty mired in poverty and general dysfunction, which unfortunately tends to spill over onto their neighbors. What’s more, they seem to stay pretty dysfunctional, whether from the second and third generations absorbing the community culture, or from a steady stream of new immigrants as the second etc generations move out. Basically, a big enough group of unassimilated immigrants turns their community into pretty much what they left behind, because culture doesn’t come from where you are now, but who you are. If they don’t assimilate, they don’t change, their culture doesn’t change, and their communities show it.

        This is the dynamic that most concerns me about mass immigration (and yes, we have had mass immigration from Mexico and now from points further south). Come here to be an American, and I’m your best friend. Come here to turn a piece of America into the shithole you left behind, only with better plumbing, and I’m not too excited.

  80. KibbledKristen

    Hilarity ensues at University of Kansas (TW: TSTSNBN + Soave)

    1. commodious spittoon

      Who expected MSG would be so salty?

      1. KibbledKristen

        I think they’re just tryna add some flavor to the campus.

  81. Derpetologist

    Oh, how I laughed

    The Wreck called Hillary Clinton
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xOwSaSl_PGk

    To the tune of “The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald”

    1. straffinrun

      Nice.

    2. Slammer

      heh

    1. commodious spittoon

      What over?

      1. straffinrun

        That H&M controversy. You really have to be a racist to think H&M was being racist.

        1. commodious spittoon

          D’oh. Glibs had one of its washed-out theme hiccups, I didn’t see the link until I refreshed.

  82. commodious spittoon

    Sue, baby, sue: Yale permits two accusers of alleged groping by conservative columnist to coordinate testimony during kangaroo court trial. I hope the guy makes a mint off the school’s alums.

  83. KibbledKristen

    SJW victim & Yale prof eviscerates Howard “Yeehaw” Dean.

    1. cyto

      Wow… that would be an awesome takedown if it had not been delivered via twitter.

  84. Derpetologist

    Iran has fired 23 ballistic missiles since start of 2015 nuclear deal, explosive report shows
    http://www.foxnews.com/politics/2018/01/25/iran-has-fired-23-ballistic-missiles-since-start-2015-nuclear-deal-explosive-report-shows.html

    ***
    Iran has aggressively pursued its ballistic missile program since agreeing to the 2015 nuclear deal, regularly launching nuclear-capable missiles in what critics consider a violation of the spirit of the deal, according to a report obtained by Fox News.

    The report shows Iran has fired some 23 missiles since signing the deal, including as many as 16 of which were nuclear-capable. The controversial deal reached with the Obama administration did not include a ban on missiles, and Iran and European signatories to the agreement stress international inspectors have certified Iran in compliance.

    But critics say the robust missile program shows the Islamic republic is bent on intimidating its enemies and preparing for the day when it can do so with the ultimate weapon of mass destruction.

    “Out of all the ballistic missiles Iran fired in 2017, only four or five missiles can be considered nuclear-capable. In 2016, Iran fired 10 to 11 missiles than can be considered nuclear-capable,” according to a report by the Foundation for Defense of Democracies. “It is highly likely that the administration’s threat intimidated Tehran, altering its flight-testing calculus.”

    The report also cites an Iranian outlet quoting Iran’s Islamic Revolutionary Guard Corps complaining of testing delays over concerns of a potential response by the United States.
    ***

    Maybe we should send them another pallet of money.

    1. commodious spittoon

      Let Israel off the leash.

  85. Tonio

    Yo, SP, the new bottom of page button works great. Thanks. Big help for mobile posters.

    But the new color scheme makes it difficult to tell when there’s a link tag everything is in shades of gray.

    1. Tonio

      Dammit, now back to blue. You messing with me?